


ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ ⁽ᵀᴹᴺᵀ⁾ (Book Two)

by Hydrakinz



Series: The Poison Trilogy [2]
Category: BayverseTMNT, TMNT - Fandom, TMNT2k14, TMNT2k16, Turtlecest - Fandom
Genre: Anal Sex, Blood and Gore, Drama, Drama & Romance, Explicit Sexual Content, Fanfiction, Fantasy, Fiction, Gay Sex, Immortality, Kidnapping, M/M, Oral Sex, Other, Pregnancy, Rape, Romance, Rough Kissing, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Sex, Slow Burn, TMNT, Temporary Amnesia, Terrapin, Turtlecest (TMNT), Vampires, Violence, beastiality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:28:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 51
Words: 171,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21672223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hydrakinz/pseuds/Hydrakinz
Summary: " ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ "ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀITS OFFICIAL, BOOK THREE IS COMING!This is BOOK TWO, if you haven't read book one then you won't understand the upcoming plotline. I suggest you read BOOK ONE if you haven't already. Thank you and Cowabunga!This Story Contains #Turtlecest.໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family.  The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.
Relationships: Donatello/Leonardo/Michelangelo/Raphael (TMNT), Donatello/Michelangelo (TMNT), Leonardo/Donatello (TMNT), Leonardo/Michelangelo (TMNT), Leonardo/Raphael (TMNT), Michelangelo/Donatello (TMNT), Raphael/Donatello (TMNT), Raphael/Leonardo (TMNT), Raphael/Michelangelo (TMNT)
Series: The Poison Trilogy [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1553749
Comments: 83
Kudos: 29





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms.
> 
> I didn't plan on posting Book Two on here until I finished it. But that is going to take me a long time, just like the first one did. Plus, I figured it would be better if I post it here 'early' so I wouldn't go through hell catching up with fifty chapters later in the future. And I also assumed that maybe some of my viewers don't really wanna bother with Wattpad, so, here's my gift to you. 
> 
> What Is Your Poison (Book One) is two hundred views away from hitting one thousand and that is INSANE. If you haven't read the first book, then please do before you continue on with this one or else this story will be SUPER confusing for you.
> 
> Anyways, for any further or do, I wish you well on your brand new journey if you've made it this far. 
> 
> I love you guys, and remember, Cowabunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

ᴾʳᵒˡᵒᵍᵘᵉ

It was a job. 

One job.

And the goal was to show no mercy. The guy on paper was into business. He liked flashing his loads to pretty women in the department. But soon, it turned into more. Underneath he was someone unrecognizable. 

The night was only just beginning and the swift but heavy movements under the barreling down rain was one hint to who was hired for the mission. They were quiet, experienced and professionally trained to the teeth. The boss knew they could pull this off with just two alone. 

"Richard Ramirez," spoke a gruff, but a light voice. 

"That him?" asked another voice, but this one was much deeper, much darker in tone. 

"Yeah," the other said, crinkling the image in his fist with a tight squeeze. 

Thunder crashed over their heads, but they didn't seem to mind the roars of weather. It had been said that tonight was going to be one of the worst thunderstorms all year round. But these boys didn't care. They lived in the thrill of it. 

A green hand-stretched over and took the image from the other and was practically stabbing through the paper with his stare. They were covered in black head to toe. This type of material in clothing would keep them hidden from anything and everything. 

Out of sight, out of mind was another goal.

"They ever tell this guy he's got a name that could never be forgotten?" 

The smaller one shrugged, "Whoever named him as a kid, wanted him dead," 

"Let's move then,"

They took off in the heat of the night just before leaping to the other side of the building they resigned on. It was pitch black and slippery as shit out here, but their skills made up for it. 

Once on the roof, one of them slipped down as quietly as they could, while noticing the night guards just below under a street light of some sort. They all had guns. One in hand and a pistol on the off-hand strapped to their thigh. 

The bigger intruder thought briefly about how easy this was gonna be. 

An In And Out Job. 

But either way- it was gonna get messy. Very messy. 

"Quiet," the smaller interrupted just before slipping into an open window on the top floor. 

"Yeah, yeah," 

Once they were both in, their new objective was to find Richard's office. Which was luckily on this floor. They had gotten lucky and skipped over at least a dozen guards. It'd be like some sort of boss fight in a video game before they even reached this dude if they alerted anyone or took the short route.

A few lights were on, and the place was dusty. For someone, a man of business, he sure didn't enjoy cleaning all that much. 

The smaller intruder crept along the wall towards the brightest light they could set their eyes on. And sure enough, once the room was made to peek into the office, a light-skinned man at the age of thirty maybe was sitting at his desk. But he was asleep and snoring loud enough to wake the whole north side of New York. 

The two pushed open the door, but still to be quiet. 

"Did you bring the rope?" 

The other nodded in reply and even found some tape in one of the storage drawers. 

Perfect. 

After they gagged and tied Richard up, he was carried on the larger intruder's shoulder and soon they vanished into thin air. As if they weren't even in the building. No alarms, no fights or gunshots were to be heard. It was a all heat in the moment type of situation. Luck was on their side tonight and luckily no one got hurt. 

Yet.

The two soon appeared heading towards an abandoned building a few blocks away from the town square. They took their time entering the shattered parking lot where bricks and dust could be swept up just be a sneeze at this rate, and sitting in the lot was a four-door SUV. 

As the intruders had gotten closer, the men in the car got out and only one seemed familiar. 

"No trouble?" John simply asked, motioning for the boys to put Richard down. 

"As requested, absolutely none," the smaller confirmed just as the larger threw the man from his shoulder, which shook him from sleep, and he instantly began panicking and squirming at John's feet. 

"For your first go, I'm honestly impressed. After all, this was your idea, Leonardo," John beamed glancing down at the squirming man. 

Leo glanced up at the larger form and removed his mask, as did the other. 

"We wanted to help," Leo explained, "Right, Raph?"

Raph chewed on a toothpick he soon put between his teeth just after taking off the balaclava, "Uh-huh. More like clean this place up. Nobody ever worries about the south side anyway and now we do," 

"Very well," John says, motioning his men to get rid of Richard and two of them came forth and lifted him from his feet and shoulders and put him in the car. 

"What's gonna happen to him?" Leo questions watching John's men carry him away. 

"Well, I'm stuck between killing the poor bastard or just throwing him in a cell for the rest of his life. But, that part worries me, he's uh, got a lot of money. I mean, I've got more, but there is a possibility he could get a lawyer, and have every inch of proof of being involved with the city murders and getting out clean. It's a battle between life and death here," John explains, waving his hand towards the turtles.

"Why not just kill him?" Raph questions with a sneer. 

Leo shoots him a glare, "Raph, if there is another choice other than that, the man would just suffer in prison for the rest of his life. He would suffer at nothing if someone killed him," 

"Relax you two, I'll figure it out. For now, here's your payment, as promised," John says just before handing out two stacks of bills to the turtles. 

They both were paid with enhanced utility for getting the job done right. Both at least one thousand apiece. Which wasn't much in Raph's eyes, but well worth it for his save bank. 

"Thanks again for this. We kinda need it right now," Leo says and John smiles at that. 

"I know, kid. Even though I said I'd take care of whatever ya need. But if you prefer to work at it hard, then fine, I'm okay with that too, but all ya gotta do is just let me know when you want outta the game. Now, both of ya's, get back home and be sure to check on Angel for me," John orders before walking away and getting back in his car, where the turtles were soon left to be alone. 

Once gone, Raph gave Leo a quick high five before leaving the lot. 

Leo wasn't so sure that this was what he wanted anymore. This kinda life. But he was just so damn stubborn and independent. He couldn't give up now, not ever. 

And Raph, well. Raph did it for the thrill. 

ᵀᵒ ᴬ ᴺᵉʷ ᴮᵉᵍⁱⁿⁿⁱⁿᵍ


	2. ᵂᵉ'ʳᵉ Fᵃⁿᵗᵃˢᵗⁱᶜ, ᴺᵉᵛᵉʳ ᴾᵃⁿⁱᶜ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ᴵ

ᵂᵉ'ʳᵉ Fᵃⁿᵗᵃˢᵗⁱᶜ, ᴺᵉᵛᵉʳ ᴾᵃⁿⁱᶜ

. . .Two Months Later. . .

[ Michelangelo ]

The sun was officially coming out. The heat on my scales was everlasting while I hummed with how good it felt. The stay in the penthouse has been, odd. But eventful. Nothing goofy has happened. And even nothing much has changed since the last time. 

And by last time, I mean last time I was able to smile without worry. 

Me and my brothers were changing every single day with the new techniques Leo has been teaching us. He's developed some moves for Raph's anger issues, Donnie's nightmarish brain. Which caused him to worry about literally everything- I mean, come on, that dude never took a break. 

And me, well, I've kinda developed my own. 

My mind is tuned with the history of the planet. And I haven't told anyone. Well, is that how you'd explain it? Don would probably say it some other way but my way was good enough in my eyes. 

I was able to channel my Chi with the history of my own life and the others. And even total strangers. For the past two weeks, I was able to concentrate better than I ever have in my entire life. Sensei couldn't even get me to sit down for more than two seconds before I was bouncing off the walls again. But, this new ability was something I couldn't figure out if it was bad or good.

Donatello would consider it good. He would probably even say that he was proud of me and how smart I've grown to be. Don't get me wrong or nothing I liked compliments. But I didn't think I was done learning just yet. 

When I woke up this morning- not to mention it was highly unusual for myself to be up around this time, I checked in to see if everyone was asleep. And sure enough, they were. Raph was snoring like some wild animal, which in our case, he technically was. It made me giggle when I passed his door. Donnie didn't make a sound when he slept but I figured that he was sleeping in Leo's bed, but he wasn't. 

I peered into Leo's room, and the curtains were drawn to dim out the sunshine. I figured if anybody that needed to be up it was definitely the fearless leader, himself. So, I thought I'd give him a good wake up call. 

If that made sense. 

Once I was in, I shut the door as quietly as I could and popped the lock. 

I was suddenly feeling a bit rebellious. But playfully rebellious. 

Leo was still our leader. But for some reason, he just wasn't acting himself. And neither was Donnie. Though the nerd seemed a bit happier than throwing up all the time. I figured that whatever was wrong with him had finally passed. Which I was glad for because hearing another person, even if it is your brother, it's gross A-F. If you know what I'm saying. 

Leonardo's room was pretty much the same as the rest of our bedrooms. But he always kept his clean. He spent time trying to teach the rest of us that, except for Donatello of course. Those two were like peas in a pod. I guessed they truly were meant for each other at the end of the day and so were me and Raphael. 

Leo's room was neatly decorated with his usual decor. Which were very few miscellaneous things. Like things involving swords and sharp objects. Chinese history of course. He loved the style and the language those people spoke. 

I knew very little words from the Japanese nature, but Leo sort of it knew it all. 

When I saw him in bed, he was sleeping on his side which was kind of surprising because being a turtle and all, it was sort of hard lying upfront unless you were getting banged of course. Then you don't worry about it. 

I wanted to giggle thinking about it and I bit my lip to silence myself. If I made a peep I could risk waking Leo and having him embarrass the hell out of me by asking why I was in his room watching him sleep like some deranged serial killer waiting to chop his shell off when he wasn't looking. 

I was kind of hoping to get lucky and not have him wake up at all during my visit. But with the simple plans, I had in mind, I knew that was going to be very unlikely to a certain extent. 

As I was wondering over to Leo's bed, I thought about what it was really like to be in bed with the one and only. And not by literally be in bed, I meant like, having him like, well, you know. 

I felt sort of shy being this close to Leo without having some sort of real reason. Even though I had an objective. I planned to do exactly what I usually have done to Raph on some mornings. 

Was that bad? Or maybe weird? I dunno. I just kinda felt like doing it for some reason and even with Raph, I just wanna do it, even if he doesn't ask me for it. On top of that, I kinda felt like Leo deserves this kind of attention. 

I inhaled a sharp breath before I made my bold move to crawl into Leo's bed. He didn't move once I was in and on my knees. The patterns on his skin and even the colorful markings on his shell were sort of different compared to the rest of ours. Donatello didn't have any, to begin with. He refused tattoos from a young age and even on the back of his shell, he had a few purple spots here and there, but it was very little. 

Compared to Leo and Raph, they enjoyed them. I guess it was kind of like a pain thing but I didn't want tattoos because of the pain. But because I thought it'd be cool to have some sort of image on your body that you could never wash off or replace. 

The thing about Leo was that I was inexperienced with his body and with the others, I kinda knew a bit of everything. Donnie, I'm sure knew a bit more than Raph did, considering they only did it like once. 

I was on a mission to find exactly what my big brother enjoyed and didn't. 

I picked up the ridge of the white blanket covering Leo's body and slowly pulled it down until his entire body was exposed. Yet he still didn't move. I definitely was striking gold in this ballpark. Leo was a very light sleeper which meant I was walking in very thin water at this point. But today- no, today was my lucky day which left me grinning from ear to ear. 

I also noticed that Leo wore no pants when he slept. Not even boxers or pajama bottoms. This dude went straight commando. I was kinda used to that but with Leo, it surprised me. I figured that by the end of all this, I'd have a lot to be shocked for. 

I reached forward and ran my index finger down the back of his bicep until I reached his elbow, then I carried on down the side of his shell until I reached the bottom. Once I got a little closer, I found Leo's tail. The tail was my most favorite part of my brothers except for a lot of other things and the smell. But the tail was like a sacred vault that you could only excess unless you had a password or something to get in. 

But Leo's tail was right here in front of me and I had to fight the urge to not touch it until I was ready to. I first had to get Leo on to his back. 

I slowly grasped his bicep again and kind of pulled him towards me. Which made him move on his own. He didn't wake up, thankfully and moved onto his shell and got comfortable again. 

Yes!

I could officially see his face. He looked kind of dreamy when he slept. Not ugly or just bland. He looked peaceful almost and he didn't snore. Plus, he wasn't wearing his mask. And to think the same thing about Leo as I did Raph, they both looked better without it. Even sexier. 

I swallowed the lump in my throat and wet my lips since I noticed that they were pretty dry at the moment. My eyes wandered down Leo's body until they stopped dead between his legs. His member wasn't of course out yet. But I could see an obvious bulge in Leo's plastron. 

Morning wood at it's finest was all I could think about. 

Maybe Leo was having a perverted dream. 

I finally decided to move down a little lower. I was sat on my knees just a bit between my brother's legs. I could see every inch of him from here. Leo wasn't as ripped as Raph was, but he was getting there. His body was kinda small, but his tallness made up for it including the amount of muscle he carried. 

I leaned down just between his legs and inhaled his scent. I then quickly positioned my mouth just inches above the bulge in Leo's plastron and planted a kiss there. Then another, moving my way down. I wondered if I could get my leader to drop down without having to wake him. I knew it was possible, but it was Leo after all. Stubborn, Independent and just in between being a Dom and a Sub. Nothing wrong with that of course, even though he fought with it every single time he was around Raph. 

I continued to kiss and occasionally nibble once I was between his thighs, I left a mark or two just there. I could obviously see my brother fidgeting in his sleep. He was fighting the urge to wake up, and at this point, I didn't really care. That was the joy in doing this for my brothers. 

When they wake up, to find me here, and feel what I'm doing for them only made me feel happy and proud all at the same time. I liked surprising them with these little gifts. 

I began to run the surface of my tongue along Leo's slit and with very little attempt, his member was slowly beginning to expose itself. Another proud grin was plastered on my face I'm sure during this. I kept licking until I could taste the salty substance leaking from his tip. 

I even began to wonder if Leo had the same problem as me. Neither Raph or Donnie was self-lubricating and only I had discovered such a thing since puberty started for me. 

"That's it, come to, Mikey" I coaxed quietly while watching Leo fidget some more until his fully hardened flesh was out in the opening. The smell of his sex ingulfed my nose and enlightened me to do such a thing even more. The smell was something that always brought me in. Each one of my brothers had their own musk, and Leo's was kind of honey-like but almost sweet. Oh, and of course musky. 

I was literally drooling from the sight in front of me and even from an angle, Leo's cock was pulsating just from how hard he was. 

Did I do that?

I leaned in and licked the tip with my tongue. Letting the taste explore my tastebuds. I couldn't help but want more. I licked down my brother's member until I reached the end and I went back up swallowing the head and lapping at the tip again with my tongue like a dog with peanut butter. 

My face was superheated and from the smell alone and Leo's body was turning me on more than I thought it would. I wanted to hold off until I was done with him. But I don't think I can fight my hormones. It was impossible. 

Leo was fidgeting some more. More than he was and from what I could see from below, his eyes even began to flutter. His fists were clenching the sheets. I knew I was making him feel good. Even in his sleep. 

I pushed an inch or two further into my mouth and suckled a little more but holding off from too much for now. Once I sank a little deeper, Leo stirred from his slumber and was looking all around the room until his eyes set on me and what I was doing. 

A gasp escaped his lips, "Mikey?" he croaked, sounding hot and heavy from sleep. 

I hummed, removing his member from my mouth and lapping at the shaft just on the side to give him a bit of a view, "Yes, big bro?" 

"Fuck, what're you doing?" Leo quickly glanced over at the clock, seeing that it was half seven. 

"I don't think I need to tell you, dude," I grinned, "You're a pretty smart, turtle, fearless," 

Leo's head falls back with an exhale, "Stop playing around, Michelangelo-- Woah, shit," he gasps again once I sank back down, swallowing just half of his erection. He pulled his head back up to watch me and I stared up at him with half-lidded eyes. My face was sure to be red as hell, but it made me look even better this way. I enjoyed the feeling of being full or filled. 

"Mm," I hummed around Leo's cock, sinking down a little further and handling the girth very well. Leo tasted sweeter than expected. And doing this for him only called to me in some sort of way. A naughty kind of way I guessed. 

Once my brother's member was fully inside of my mouth, the expression he gave me was priceless, "H-How the hell do you, ah, know how to d-do that," he half moans, knotting his fingers in the sheets again. 

I pulled all the way up and gave away with the pop of my lips while drooling again. I wrapped my fingers around the base and gave Leo an innocent look and shrugged, "Raphie gives me good practice," 

"W-What's the catch?" he asked on a shaky breath. 

I tilted my head at him, "No catch, just wanted to. So, relax for once, would you?" 

"Damn it, Raph is gonna kill me, Mikey," Leo sighed, and right as he spoke, I reached for his tail and gave it a light squeeze. He jolted upright in surprise, staring right down at me with wide but lust-filled eyes. I began to massage his tail while I slid my mouth back over his cock. 

I swallowed it whole and let my head bob up then down a couple of times until I felt Leo's hand at the back of my skull, praising me. He was sitting up now but was holding himself up with his hand pressed into the mattress. I felt his fingers press into the top of my head once I gained enough speed to please. 

"Mikey, shit, like that," he moaned above me, turning me on even more and urging me forward to take it even further. 

I pulled up again and released Leo just before circling the head with my tongue. I sat up on my knees and stared at his glaring face. He looked disappointed and well prepared to rip my head off. It was kind of adorable. Alluring even. 

"It wasn't my plan to make you cum, fearless," I whispered, leaning into him. I kissed his neck and bit his collarbone a couple of times and at this point, I could hear his breathing and even a growl from the nips I was giving him. 

"You're a tease, Michelangelo," he accused not touching me. Yet. 

"So I have heard, dude," I giggled, crawling into his lap, "Don't worry about Raph," I then whispered, grinding my hips down against him earning a churr from myself. 

Leo's eyes lit up at the sound of me and eventually, his hands found their way towards my pajamas. I knew that by the look on his face, he wanted them off immediately so, I slowly stood up on my knees again and with that, Leo pulled them down and ripped them away from both of us. We were both now fully naked and the space between us was quiet except for the excessive breathing and panting. 

He was truly intimidating and I wondered if he could be as rough as Raph was. 

"You've forced me into a rabbit hole," he whispers inches from my lips, eventually pressing into me. I reached for his face, but he grabs both of my hands and forces them on his chest instead. I let my eyes slip closed and pressed even harder into him. 

Leo finally lied back pulling me with him while his arms were securely wrapped around my shell. Without even noticing it I was wiggling my hips into finding exactly where my position was to get him inside of me. I was searching for my mating cycle here and then. I couldn't help but suddenly need even more than I originally planned. 

I quickly searched with my hand while my lips were still on Leo's and I found his cock between us and guided it towards the opening in my legs. I lifted my tail to allow access and with a single press, the head of Leo's member was penetrating me. I inhaled deeply at the stab in my lower half but quickly calmed myself that the pain would go away eventually. Leo winced against my lips and pulled away for a moment to catch his own breath of air. 

I groaned at the filling sensation riding in my behind just before I fully sank down on my brother's lap. "God," I groaned, needing this for so long. My curiosity had peaked long ago and for a while, I was just awaiting my chance. 

"Mikey," Leo rasped, gripping my thighs for support. His fingers dug into my skin and crawled to my tail, which I'm sure he knew I loved very much. I churred when he squeezed it and I immediately began to move faster. 

"L-Leo careful w-with that, ah," I whined, pressing the palms of my hands flat against his chest for better leverage. I sped up some more, letting my eyes close again. I was really enjoying myself and the feelings coursing through my shell. It felt too good. 

I felt Leo's hips twitch and he began to thrust upwards into me, churring in his own words and holding me by my hip in one hand and my tail in the other, "That's good, really good, baby bro," Leo moans fueling my veins. 

"More!" I churred, clenching my teeth feeling him go harder, and deeper, making me throw my head back in surprise. 

"Like that?" he panted thrusting up into me while now holding me by the curve of my hips. 

I nodded frantically and moaned louder, "Y-Yeah, yeah, like that! Fuck me, Leo, God, like that!" 

I reached for my own cock and feverishly began to rub myself to completion. Leo suddenly switched up our position and threw me down on my back and did exactly as I wanted. His forehead was pressed against mine once he found a rhythm and pounded into me just like how I liked it. I couldn't stop myself from becoming any louder. I threw my left arm around his neck and pulled him in even closer, digging my fingers into the back of his throat and curling my toes at the heat pooling my gut.

I was close. 

"Yeah, Mikey keep moaning like that for me, damn, I'm gonna cum!" he practically growled into my ear pounding into me even faster. 

I shook my head, "Can't, fuck, there, keep hitting there! L-Leo, ah," I churred, letting my cock go along with my release, which coated my entire upper body including my neck and even some on my face. 

Leo went for my lips and held me there in a kiss as he came, giving me the fuller feeling I desired for every single time I mated. It gave me an even better feeling due to the aroma of being claimed. 

Leo kissed me until he needed to breathe again. I honestly didn't want him to stop but I sort of felt as if he wasn't the type to just sit around and cuddle after sex. I pecked his lips one last time before he pulled out of me and crawled away. I was beginning to feel empty again. 

"Where are you going?" I quietly asked. 

Leo got up to his feet and pulled some pants from the floor he discarded the night before I'm sure and got them on. "Aren't you hungry?" he answered. 

"Oh, yeah. But is something bothering you? Did you not enjoy yourself or something?" 

Leo sighed and crawled back onto the bed and kissed me again, "Of course I did, Mikey. You definitely surprised me. I needed that more than you think," he said holding me by my face. 

I stared into Leo's sacred blue eyes that were almost like mine, but way darker. They told stories I couldn't explain, but something was definitely on his mind. 

"Okay but, is everything okay between you and D?" 

Leo's face fell a bit and he sat up on both of his knees and shrugged his shoulders. "Well, yes and no. We should get to breakfast. Now isn't really the time to be talking about my relationship with Donatello,"

Leo crawled off of the bed and went for the door, but I jumped up and stopped him, "No, now is a perfect time, Leonardo. I wanna know what is going on. I know what we just did doesn't really change much, but I'm tired of you being so locked up. So, tell me!"

My brother huffed loudly and stared over my head at everything else except for me, "Fine, you wanna know?" he asked, but didn't let me answer, "Donatello is pregnant," he said rushing past me and out the bedroom door, leaving me stunned. 

"Pregnant?" was all I could mutter. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	3. ᴷᵉᵉᵖ ᴵᵗ Qᵘⁱᵉᵗ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ||

ᴷᵉᵉᵖ ᴵᵗ Qᵘⁱᵉᵗ

[ Raphael ]

"The hell is french toast?" 

"Cinnamon Toast, Raphael," Jameson answered with a slight smirk. 

This dude and his accent were really startin' to get on my last nerve. We've been dealin' with him since we moved in this fancy dump. Why couldn't we just live someplace where a butler wasn't with it? It was like some toy that needed batteries, but these ones were actually included. 

"It smells rank," I grimaced while covering my snout just as Leo wonders into the kitchen. 

He gives the butler a respectful bow and sits next to me at the bar, "What smells good?" 

"Good? Are you kiddin' me, Leo?" 

"What? I like cinnamon," he says to me just before digging into the food on his plate. 

"You have fun groomin', Mikey?" I whispered nearly pushing him off his stool. 

"Watch it, Raph. And yeah, maybe I did, but he came to me," Leo shrugs, "Wasn't my fault"

"Oh yeah?" I grumbled, "So he crawled into your bed and said bang me, oh fearless leader?"

Leo stared up at the butler who was minding his own business scrambling eggs. 

"Yeah. If you wanna put that way then I guess you're right," Leo answered furthering my irritation, "I warned him about what you might do or even think about me and him messing around like that. But he told me not to worry about you," 

"You're being a tattle tell this morning you butthead," I heard Mikey whine from behind. 

He skipped into the kitchen and smiled up at me, "Oops," Leo laughed.

"You're the butthead for smooching with, Leo," I accused, making Mikey frown at me. 

"I need to talk to you," Mikey said giving me an honest look despise me being upset with him. 

"You're skipping breakfast?" Leo questions with a mouth full. 

"Yeah, just keep stuffin' your face there Leo," I remarked rolling my eyes and strolling out of the kitchen with Mikey at my heels. 

"Are ya mad at me, Raphie?" my little brother asks grabbing my hand and I resist pulling away from him and shake my head. 

"No, not really. I just don't like the idea of someone else gettin' on ya," I admitted going into the gym. 

"Well, I didn't like the idea of you being with Donnie or Leo," Mikey also admitted while stubbornly crossing his arms, "Ugh, now you've got me distracted!"

I stared down at Mikey for a second, then I sighed sitting on the bench left of the room. "How's about I don't?" 

"What?" he glanced up.

"What if I don't get with em' anymore?" 

"You'd do that?" 

I lied back and lifted the weights off of the set, "Why wouldn't I?" 

"Because I know I'm not good enough, Raph," I heard Mikey reply. 

I stopped dead in my tracks and put the weights back down, "Who the hell told ya that?"

"I dunno, I just kinda feel like it sometimes. Even though I hate the place, I miss Japan because then, it was just me and you. Sorta," 

"Oh, Mikey," I sighed, pulling him closer, "Do you remember the first time I told ya I loved you?"

"In the pool," he mutters avoiding my eyes, "The temple pool,"

"Yeah, and your dream," I grinned as he stares up at me. 

"Dream?" he asks. 

"Yeah, your wet dream, about a year ago now," 

"Oh. OH," Mikey flushes trying to pull away from me, "That dream," 

"Yeah, that dream and all those times when you played with yourself," I replied with a huge smirk on my face. 

"Those visions of yours are really becoming something huh?" Mikey nervously laughed up at me. 

"You wanna make a deal, little bro?" 

"A deal, Raph?" 

"Yeah, a deal that involves us being together as one, and we end this brawl between the four of us," 

Mikey stares up at me obviously surprised, "You mean like, be a couple?" 

I thought about it for a minute, "Well, yeah!" 

Mikey practically jumps into my arms, "Double Dog Deal!" he shouts, hugging my neck. 

"I assume this makes ya happy," I said, my voice becoming muffled from Michelangelo's tight squeeze. "Are ya finally gonna tell me whatcha was gonna talk to me about?"

Mikey suddenly got quiet and looked at me, "Oh, right, um,"

"Go on," I sang placing Mikey over my lap.

"Are you sure now is the right time, seems kinda, awkward to get serious now," 

"Mikey tell me, or else I'll just have to tickle it outta ya," 

"Fine, fine! Jeez. Leo told me some alarming news," he answered with slight panic in his voice. 

"And?"

Mikey began to twirl the ends of his mask, "Told me that Don was pregnant," 

I chuckled, "I'm sorry, what?" 

Mikey nodded, "I'm being serious, Raph," 

I frowned a bit and moved Mikey off of me and stood up, "How the shell is that possible?" 

Then something clicked inside of me. 

Donatello's explanation. I remember it. 

"Maybe Leo was just playing around," Mikey suggested with worried eyes. 

"Leo doesn't play around, Mike. Especially with somethin' that fuckin' crazy"

My head started spinning and deep inside, I started seeing stars and flashing images again. This was how it always started. 

Back at the construction site, the conversation me and Donnie had. 

More images flashed in my mind and suddenly I wasn't in the present. I saw blood, something white and the rest of us. We all were standing over an egg and Donatello was nowhere to be found. 

My mind flashes again, and suddenly a crack in the glass almost and before my very eyes I saw a baby, unlike any other human baby. Like us, like. . . me. 

"Venus," I muttered, completely blanking out. 

"Raph?" Mikey said shaking my arm to get my attention. 

"We need to find, Donatello," I concluded while quickly exiting the room.

"Wait, what do you mean? Why do we need to find, Donnie?" Mikey questioned while staying with me. 

"I need to find him to tell him about what I saw. I saw shit I didn't need to see!" I nearly shouted barging into Donnie's room without knocking at all. 

But he wasn't there, so I checked the shower. 

"Uh, Raph, he isn't here," Mikey cheered from the bedroom.

"Then where the fuck is he?" I asked, fully shouting now, "Donatello!" 

I stormed out of the room and going straight for the kitchen, "Leo, where is he?" 

"Jesus, Raph, what is it?" I heard Donnie call and when I saw him, I saw more blood in my vision. 

"You can't have the baby!" I blurted out. 

Leo sighs, "Mikey you do got a big mouth," 

"Shut up, Leo," I warned, "You caused this!" 

"What're you talking about, Raphael?" Donnie questions coming out from behind the island in the kitchen. 

"I saw it, saw you, you know," I tried and shook my head. 

"You had another vision?" Donnie quietly asks. 

"You died! You didn't survive the birth-- like April," I explained. 

"What?" Leo basically gasped, "You saw him die? When the fuck were you able to see that type of crap, Raphael?"

"Leo, you have no say in this shit! You caused it! Donnie will die because of you, asswipe!" I shouted in his face as Donnie backed away from both of us. 

"Actually-" Donnie interrupted, but continuing to do whatever he was doing with his food before I came through, "He wasn't the only one," 

Everyone including Mikey stared at our brother. My thoughts were suddenly boggled. 

What did he mean by that? 

"What did you say?" Leo questions, acting just as surprised as the rest of us. Mikey remained quiet but surprisingly excited. 

"You heard me, Leo," Don sighs, lifting his head to look at us.

"Yeah, we heard you. But we want you to explain what that means, in English!" he remarks. 

That couldn't mean what I think it did, right?

"Alright," Donnie began but placed his hands flat on the countertop to relax a little, "A few months back. Even before April found out about Codey. I was brushing up on my own studies. That involved our bodies. I even analyzed our blood,"

"Our blood, how did you even get our blood, dude?" Mikey then steps in, "Don't you gotta get that through shots or something?" 

"It's pretty easy to prick your fingers while you're sleeping, Mikey," Donatello answered, "Anyway- it came down to a specific thought. Especially after April announced that she was carrying- then I looked more into it. She provoked me into finding out if, well, if we," he motioned to us all, "Could have a family of our own- If we ever wanted to,"

"Did we ever say we did? Did I, Donnie? Did I ever say I wanted a kid, right now?" Leo barked but I glared in his direction. 

"Well, No," Donnie whispered. 

"Yeah! Exactly!" 

"Chill Leo!" I warned him off and he rolled his eyes. 

"Basically um, and Raph kind of already knows this. As I told him, it's possible within us all, including himself," Donnie explains, "And with all three of your DNA's, it became even more possible with me," 

My interest was suddenly peeked more than before, "Our DNA?" 

"Our blood?" Mikey asked. 

Donatello shook his head, "Um," he began, looking flushed, "Your sperm cells," 

Mikey suddenly bursts into laughing making himself echo all around the room. His hands were already on his knees to hold himself up from falling over, "Hah, wait, no, I can't!" 

I stared down at him with disgust, "But that means," 

"It means the kid belongs to us all," Leo gushed with more panic in his voice. 

"Correct!" Donnie chirps, seeming happy with all of this. 

"The kid, our, turtle, the baby! It's mine?" I asked getting closer to Donnie. 

Donnie looks up at me from the counter, "Yeah. Well, technically it's yours, Leo's and Mikeys," 

"How the hell did you even get, Michelangelo's sperm?" Leo asked coming forward. 

"The conclusion to that is Mikey never cleans his room. Like ever. Especially after um, relieving himself," Donnie answers clearing his throat. 

"But, ah, Jesus, how!" Leo asks, practically freaking out. 

"I gathered a sample from each of you in simple ways. From your bodies, after sexual intercourse, or after you've of course done what I explained with Michelangelo," Donnie said. 

"I need a drink," I sighed holding my head, "Or maybe someone to punch,"

"I figured you'd all be happy," Donatello frowns. 

"I'm gonna be a freakin' dad!" Mikey suddenly shrieks. 

"Did you mix the samples together?" I questioned further to my brother who nodded his head. 

"Yes. It made things a little funky. But it went through analyzation, and to my calculation and collaborations, it was a perfect idea," 

"You didn't inform us, Donnie!" Leo yelled slamming his fist on the counter, making him jump, "Mikey is better off having a damn kid!" 

"Hey! That is enough!" I yelled in his face, suddenly feeling heated, "You need to think about something else right about now! I saw him fuckin' die havin' that kid! Whether it's ours or not, he isn't havin' it!" 

"You can't be serious, Raphael," Donnie practically laughs. 

"I am not losing you over something you so selfishly wanted, Donatello!" I roared right back at him. 

"No, Raph!" Mikey then yelled, "You can't do that!" 

"It will kill him, Mikey!" 

"We can find a way!" my little brother argues, making me growl in the process. 

"And what if there isn't, huh? What if he gives birth, and he dies? What if we can't save him? What about the blood, the fuckin' mess we'd have to clean up! We lost, dad! April and even fuckin' Casey and you wanna argue with me about losin' my own brotha! Fuck you!" I shouted in Mikey's face, noticing the tears in his eyes. 

I exhaled tightly and made a decision whether to run for the door or stay and stand my ground. But before I could even make that decision, Angel came running into the room with a few pieces of mail in her hands. 

"You guys, guys! You have a letter!" she announced wiggling it in her painted fingers. 

"Oh great," Donnie said, cleaning up around the kitchen. 

"Let me see that!" Leo jumped forward before I could get the letter from Angel, "That envelope has a Japanese wax stamp on it. It's from the Tribunal," 

Me and Leo gazed at each other at the same exact time. We all knew what and why we got kicked out of the temple. But this letter, it had to be something more. 

"Well, open it," I said, gesturing off to the piece of paper. 

"It must be really important if it has one of those fancy stamps on it," Angel exclaimed, smiling towards Mikey. "Is the baby up yet?" 

"Let's go check, babe," Mikey answered leaving the kitchen with the purple-haired kid strolling in behind him. 

"We don't need this shit right now, Leo. The hell does it say?" 

Leo shook his head with an answered, but something told me with the way he was holding the letter, it wasn't good. "The Ancient One is coming to New York," 

My eyes widened, "What?" 

"Wow. I didn't think he'd ever leave, Japan," Donnie agreed, doing up the dishes. 

Soon, Mikey and Angel came back into the kitchen looking more chipper than I could ever attempt right now. But there was something Mischevious on their faces. 

"So, could I have your guys' attention for just a flippin' second?" Angel questions, holding her hands behind her back. 

Mikey giggles, "Only a sec," 

I glared at them both as Leo folds the letter back into its original form and slips it onto the countertop, where Donnie is listening intently. 

"Tonight, there is a party goin' on at the Downtown Underground," Angel explains. 

"Downtown Underground?" I scoffed. 

"It's a club, Raph," Mikey grins. 

"What type of party?" Donnie then asks strutting himself around the counter to stand by me. 

"Well, the place isn't exactly like any other place. But it'll be a costume party- you know, kinda like Halloween," she says. 

"It ain't October, Angel," I rolled my eyes. 

"Yeah! Well, October is every single day for me, big head, Raph!" she sighs, "Anyway- I'm going tonight. You guys wanna join me?" 

"No, no way- no parties. It's a risk of exposing ourselves," Leo interrupted. 

"Plus, we gotta worry about Codey," Donnie admits. 

"Don't worry about the baby! I've got you guys all covered with Jameson. Come on, Leo, let your brothers have a night away from all the stuff you guys deal with! You could have some real fun!" Angel explains, making each one of us look at each other. 

"Mikey wants to go, and if you guys don't, he is still going" Mikey announces in the third person. 

I glanced at Leo and tilted my head and gave him a convincing look, "It wouldn't hurt, bro," 

Leo sighed loudly which signaled that he had given in already and with a great big smirk on my face, and I nodded my head with approval. 

"Fine, but we're only staying an hour or so, and remember, no drinking!" Leo warns off, exiting the room with the letter in his hand. 

"So, we're like, actually going to a club?" Donatello asks with a sigh, sounding nervous. 

"Yeah, why not?" 

Mikey was practically jumping up and down he was so excited. 

"Just do me one favor," Angel says, catching my attention as I lean on the counter next to Donnie, "Just don't piss anyone off, tonight," she smiles. 

"Right. Leave that to Leo or Raph," Donnie announces before leaving the room.

Right. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	4. ᴸᵉᵗ'ˢ ᴳᵉᵗ ᴬⁱʳᵇʳᵘˢʰᵉᵈ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ |||

ᴸᵉᵗ'ˢ ᴳᵉᵗ ᴬⁱʳᵇʳᵘˢʰᵉᵈ

. . .6:15pm. . .

[ Donatello ]

Was the idea of this okay? I mean, in my condition of course. I wasn't even showing yet. But would I even? Would I have a bump? Probably not a big one. 

I was being too much of a girl in all this. I was still a male. A male terrapin, turtle. 

Those were the same things, Donatello. 

Right, right. Focus. Tonight was big- no, tonight was bigger than big- was I taking this too seriously? Maybe I was freaking out more than Leo did when I told him about the mutation of sperm I used for the baby currently baking in my oven. 

I kinda hoped- or even swore that I wouldn't get upset no matter how bad their reactions would be. I found out more than three months ago. That was a pretty long time, right? I wasn't even showing yet and that was a huge disappointment. 

Through another analyzation of my own blood, it turned out to be positive. I tracked the blood system for weeks. I kept my vitals up and was never eating unhealthy. Though, I'm not sure that my diet mattered much. 

But when it turned out to be positive, it was good. I cried. I shed actual tears over the news. It was so much work. So many testings gone wrong or even falling into the dirt and calling it negative. My research paid off, and no, no I wasn't happy it was over. The wait was over yes. But I enjoyed it. When I was alone or even during the dark hours of the night when my brothers were off sleeping- that's when I made my move. I collected as many samples as I could. 

Blood, sweat, skin-- which to make clear wasn't actually skin. It was more or less the skin we shed when it gets too dry or something. And then everything led to getting actual sperm. 

It wasn't that hard. But it was pretty stressful. During the time I luckily wasn't pulling through a heat cycle. It made things easier and less-- well, er, distracting!

I even figured out names in my mind a few times for the egg. But I wasn't so sure yet considering I didn't wanna find out about the gender until it was in my arms. But there were bad sides to hatching an egg in the open air. 

Turtle Eggs could take weeks before they hatch. And I couldn't exactly pinpoint when it would. 

But thinking about what I did now, it does sound a little crazy. 

I mixed the samples between the four of us as one. It turned out to be brilliant. And getting inside of me wasn't exactly difficult either. A little gross, but not difficult. Nor pleasing. 

But back to the whole club situation. 

Should I go? Of course, I should. My brothers would want me to. But a party? An underground one in fact. Which meant bad things. Or usually did. It meant basically that it was a black market type of place. 

Illegal Drugs, off the shelf alcohol which could knock your socks right off, and of course, people with weapons. And sex. Lot's and lots of unprotected sex and nudity. 

But I just realized. What was Angel doing in a place like that? She was only like, fourteen. And already had a nose ring and a tattoo on her shoulder of a purple dragon. Which was kind of odd, yet familiar. 

I wondered briefly if I should put some actual clothes on since I had them now. My closet was stocked full of materials I'd probably never wear. Though, looking through the choices of pants and shoes, were pretty exciting. 

Once in my closet, I heard a knock on my bedroom door and simply gave whoever was knocking a, "It's open," and continued swatching through my choices. 

"Don?" Leo's voice rose in the entrance of my room, and before I could get out of the doorway he was already there. I gripped the hanger in my hand that had a black and gray flannel shirt on it.

"Hey," he greeted leaning on the arch leading into the closet.

"Hi," was all I responded with before hanging the shirt back up. 

"You plan on dressing up for this party?" he questioned casually but obviously looking for a way out of how he acted earlier. 

"I was thinking about it," I answered readjusting my glasses. 

"You know you don't have to. Is' a costume party after all, and technically we're already in our costumes," 

"Yeah. I know. But I just figured since we can, why not?" I replied with a small blush on my face. "Plus, I kinda like some of these. I never really thought of the possibilities of wearing real clothes,"

"Yeah. Me neither. But uh, if you wear something- maybe I should too. Maybe all of us should. Mikey already said he's dressing up," 

"As what?" I remarked with curiosity because only God knows what he has in mind. 

"Said that Angel was gonna help him and Raph set up with it. But she'd never tell me what it'd be. But I can only imagine," Leo grinned. 

"Right." I paused a minute, "Were you serious about dressing in something too? I mean, I know how you are with all of this. This life really isn't for us ninjas," 

Leo shrugs crossing his arms, "Agreed. But, Raph spoke to me in some sort of spiritual way and said that us Turtles have gotta let loose sometimes. Other than the sex of course," 

"Oh," I answered, but letting my voice fall to a whisper, "Right," I nervously laughed. 

Leo uncrossed his arms and came forward while closing in on me, but I pretended to be interested in one of the hoodies on the rack. He was gonna tease me. I know it. 

"I'm sorry about how I acted earlier. It was uh, really immature of me. And I thought about it for a while and I'm actually kinda happy for you-- for us. All of us. Even though, I uh, still think it's kinda weird that you used all of our sperms and created a mutagen basically. But-- it's a baby. It's our kid. It won't be that bad. Right?" Leo explained off, making me feel so small compared to his height that was just below two inches from me. 

"Y-Yeah," I finally spoke clearing my throat, "It was all a big shock for me too. And so was you shacking up with Michelangelo," 

Leo stilled next to me, "About that," 

I immediately started giggling and shook my head, "Doesn't bother me. I mean-- we are already brothers, but now we're Eskimo brothers towards him," 

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right. So, it doesn't bug you?"

"Well, it shouldn't. But Raph already told me about his decision," 

"What decision? 

I sighed, "He said that he doesn't wanna be a posse anymore. He was ready to just make it official with Mikey and leave me and you to it. He still loves us, like, a lot. More than I originally thought he did. But he's serious about this," 

"Oh, well, he's being smart. We should just settle down with each other. All four of us can like, double date or something" Leo smiles at me. 

"Are you feeling okay?" I questioned suddenly, "Is Leo in there? What did you do to him?" I analyzed, adjusting Leo's chin and tilting his head back, which makes him laugh at me. 

"Cut it out! I'm just trying to be positive about all this- instead of being bloodthirsty angry all the damn time," he explains, "Is that okay with you, Mr. Hamato?" 

"Hamato?" I asked, then it clicked, "Right. Hamato Yoshi. I guess that is our sirnames. How did we not notice that years ago when the NYPD asked for it?"

"I'm not sure," Leo says before leaning in to me, "But I like it," he finishes kissing me. 

I exhaled through my nose without realizing the breath I was holding in and kissed back. Which quickly turned into a little more, but I put on the breaks and pulled a few inches away from my mate and stared at him with curiosity, "So, how was it?" 

Leo looks at me, quizzing me with his eyes, "How was what?" he asks leaning in again but I put my finger over his lips and laugh. 

"With Mikey, you doofus," 

"Oh," Leo replies with another smile, "Why do you wanna know about that?" 

"I wanna know if it was as great as it was when I did it with him?" I answered honestly which made Leo raise both his eye ridges at me in surprise. 

"You topping Mikey just sounds crazy-" 

"How so, am I not good enough as a top?" 

"Shut up, I didn't say that! It's just weird, okay?" Leo chuckled placing his hands on my sides of my shell and pulling me closer. 

"Hmm," I hummed nodding my head, "We gotta get dressed,"

"It was um, it was really great," Leo then says, "A little different. Exciting and Surprising but really hot," 

"How was it different?" 

Leo seems to blush at my question, "I was sleeping when he woke me up, and uh, he was well, he was giving me a uh,"

"Oh. He did that!" I grinned in response, "I remember when he did that for me. Wasn't exactly what I had planned, but it was, eventful?"

"Bet you didn't last more than five minutes," Leo teased. 

"Unfortunately no, okay?" I rolled my eyes, "Can we get dressed now?" 

"How was it with, Raph?" 

My eyes widened at his question once I was turned towards the hanging clothes, "With Raph? Um, I don't know, it was pretty different too,"

"How?" Leo asks, sounding as if he was getting a little offensive. Which I knew would happen if we even went near this subject. It was hard enough with him finding out about it. 

Thinking about it now. Like I have over one hundred times now. I knew exactly what to say. 

"With Raph, it's more with his scent. He's got this smell, this type of heat that just makes you wanna jump him," I said, flushing deeply at my words and the memories, "And the way he looks at you. It's so intimidating and dangerous. He looks at you like he already made the decision ages ago that you were his," 

I heard Leo swallow thickly and he nodded his head, "Yeah," he answers, sounding out of breath, "I uh, I know exactly what you mean," 

"It was honestly out of this world like I'm sure it was for you and Mikey," I said skimming through the shirts again until I set eyes on another flannel, but this one was a deeper gray and black, but with accents of purple in between the lines. 

"With me, when I wanted him-- which I can't deny Donnie, I still think about it,"

"And I don't? Raph is," I paused, trying to find the words for it, "He has it all-- well, we all kind of do, but he isn't just another turtle to me, not a brother, he's just special in his own way," 

"Are we bad for wanting him even if we are together?" Leo suddenly asks. 

I glanced at him and with a small smirk, "We're all together, so, no," 

"I wanted to kind of go back," Leo says, sitting on the chair that was just one big circle in the middle of the closet room, "And tell you what happened between us," 

"You don't really have to do that," I interrupted. 

"I want to!" Leo quickly said, "When we were in Japan. That exact night. Just minutes before Mikey was sent through that fucking window," he shook his head, "Me and Raph were fighting-- like always, I cut him up, he cut me up, we didn't hold back. I can't even really remember what we were fighting over. But. It was something important. I ended up knocking him down, and I was on top of him, and I was talking to him. Almost shouting and I was asking him why he hated me so much, and when I looked down at him, something just happened to me. He said he didn't. And it was in the heat of the moment. It was vicious and almost disgusting but I kissed him. Almost past the point of kissing him really but before we could get to that point-- that's when we heard you shout. It all stopped. Until we got back in New York," 

I stood still, listening closely but understanding the best I could while I avoided the images in my head of Mikey coming through that window. His body and what those people did to him. That man. The man he later killed when he broke into the lair. Which was something I still couldn't understand. No alarms, nothing was set off. He got in and just let everything go as if he wasn't there. 

Mikey changed that day. Killing someone. Which was also something I still hadn't accomplished yet. Nor did I want to unless needed of course. I didn't even like hurting bugs, let alone my brothers or a human being. 

"I understand, Leo," I muttered in reply and pulled the shirt I saw from the hanger and neatly hung it back up. The material felt nice in my hands and against my skin. It even felt expensive. 

"That would look good on you," Leo comments, making me look up at him. Immediately held it against my body as I turned to look in the mirror. And the colors sort of suited me. I noticed Leo staring at me in the mirror and I couldn't help but smile. And eventually he rose up from his seat and gave me a peck on the cheek, "I'll let you get dressed, and I'll uh, do the same so. See you when you're done?" 

I nod my head, "Yeah. Don't try and outdo everybody else," I grinned, and Leo did the same in response and left me alone. 

I exhaled deeply once he left and started preparing my outfit. Which just let to a plain pair of black pants and some matching shoes that were similar to converses but without the laces. And they were all black instead of white. 

Since I already showered this morning I just figured some perfume or something would do after I was dressed. But then I remembered that guys don't wear perfume. I hated the word cologne. It just didn't sit well with me. 

The pants fit fine as did the shoes, which was pretty surprising considering my feet were pretty big and I had only but two toes on each foot. But I guessed that Jameson guy was smart in that area and knew exactly what to buy for each of us. I could only imagine what size Raph would be. 

As I was standing in the mirror again, I slipped the shirt over my shoulders and began to button it all the way up until it reached my neckline. And with a few smooth overs with my hands I inhaled and breathed slowly at myself, being a little stunned from how I looked. 

I looked different. But a good type of different. Almost human. But then I worried if this was party attire or not. Or even fitting enough. But who cares, it was meant to be costumes, right?

Nobody has to know the real me. 

I gave myself one final nervous look in the mirror and even another breath before letting it out and leaving my bedroom and turning the light out. 

Once out, I went towards the living area, and when I got there I saw Raph standing by the couch, looking like a total grump. He was also wearing something. . . totally strange. 

"Raph?" I asked almost stunned. 

"Don't!" he warns crossing his arms. 

Across his chest was a black and red polka-dotted bra type thing with fuzz at the hemmings and he was even wearing wings and a little headband with antennas. And of course, a tutu with the same color and matching patterns. 

"A ladybug huh?" I questioned on the brink of laughter. He looked totally out of his zone but so adorable. 

"Shut up, Donnie," Raph barked looking me up and down, "You look nice," 

I smiled standing on my tippy toes excitedly and then touching back down, "Thanks," 

Raph nodded but then his whole expression changed when he saw something over my shoulder. I stared at him confused until I turned and saw what he was so shocked over. 

"The hell are you wearing, Raph?" Leo scoffs with a huge grin on his face while coming forth and stuffing his hands into the pockets of his slacks which were a light but dark mixtured tan color. He was also wearing some sort of dress shoes that were super shiny. And his shirt, it was all black, but buttoned-up except for a few at the top, which exposed his chest and neck a little. 

"Wow," I blurted out almost tempting to cover my mouth because I didn't really wanna say that out loud. And when I did, Leo's smile returned and his eyes lightened at my reaction. 

"It fits at least," he remarks before standing next to me, smelling of spices. It tickled my nose a bit but it smelt nice. He looked amazing in those clothes. Breathtaking really. 

I bit at the inside of my cheek trying to control my hormones. 

He looked too good. 

"I never expected for my brother to dress up as a giant insect," Leo then jokes, jabbing at Raph with his elbow earning a stalking glare from him. 

"The hell is takin' Mikey so fuckin' long?" Raph nearly shouts and moves towards his bedroom door which was a little closer to the main area than ours originally was. Raph banged on the surface, "Come on ya little twerp, I know it doesn't take that long for ya to get--" 

Before Raph could finish his sentence, Mikey's door swung open, "I am not a little twerp!" our sibling shouts in the other's face. He was dressed like a bumblebee. A literal bee. Almost similar to Raph's costume except it was yellow and black, and he even had a stinger on his butt. "Call me that again and I'll zap you!" 

Raph's face goes from anger to a huge grin in a matter of seconds, "Damn, okay-- I didn't know you could be such a stinger!" 

I facepalm myself hearing Raph's awful pick-up-line but Leonardo seems to find it funnier than his outfit. 

"This is what I'm rolling with tonight," I sighed. 

"Yup, so, let's bounce," Leo says reaching out for my hand. 

"So, we're bouncing now?" I questioned slowly taking his hand. 

Leo laughs again, being shockingly giggly today and seeing him flash a smile kind of opened up a whole new world for me. His piercing blue eyes and that huge grin just completed everything that was so buried deep inside of him. 

Later on, in the car, which was new. Angel got us a driver and just told them that we were friends going to the party. Everything felt odd. It even felt awkward because we were pretending to be like everyone else. We were blending in at an event I thought I'd never go to. 

I had hoped Codey was going to be okay while we were away. I felt irresponsible for leaving him there with a total stranger. I'm sure Jameson meant well. Really well because if he hurt one of us or the baby I'm sure John would have him beheaded. 

"You're worrying too much," Leo whispered into my ear, rubbing his hand over my clothed thigh. 

I tensed up and looked around the car nervously but we were all the way in the back. Raph and Mike were in the second row of seats in front of us. But the swelling in my pants wasn't helping and neither was Leo with his small touches here and there. 

"Sorry," I muttered in reply, trying to control my breathing. 

"You look so good tonight," he compliments while whispering into my ear again, forcing me to tense up even more. 

"W-We're not even there yet, Leonardo," I said going for his hand to move it off my leg but Leo and his dominant ego, he wouldn't budge and only gripped it tighter, making me bite my lip. 

"I don't think I can wait," he admits with a hot breath of air against my neck, sending chills down my shell. 

Shit. 

My face probably looked like a tomato by now. I bit into my lip harder and held back whatever whimper was threatening to erupt from my throat. I then noticed Mikey looking over his shoulder at us both and my blush only deepened. He winked at me then whispered something to Raph I couldn't bother caring about. 

"Leo," I gritted out, feeling his teeth at my throat now, with his hand moving up my thigh and getting closer to my crotch where my cock was on the peak of dropping down. 

I realized I wasn't wearing underwear and would that become an issue. Especially if I stained these pants. I'd be screwed. 

I leaned my head against Leo's and sighed calmly trying to control myself. But my body was no match when biting was involved. I just couldn't hold it in. It was my weakness. 

"So sexy," Leo whispered, making me gasp quietly. My eyes closed and tightly too. The confined space between me, my brothers and this car was driving me crazy. I could smell anything from miles when I was turned on. And the scents that were calling me from the person next to me and the two in front of me was a low blow. 

Fuck, control it, Donatello. 

"Damn, they are really goin' at it," I heard Raph quietly remark, which made me snap out of my daze and look right at him with lust-filled eyes. My glasses lowered as I noticed both of my brothers staring at me and Leo. But Leo paid no mind and kept going. I had to get him to stop somehow or else I was gonna ruin my outfit. 

That's when the vehicle suddenly stopped and a feminine shriek came all the way from the front seat. 

"Guys, we're here! Let's go!" Angel announced quickly climbing out of the car. 

I released a breath of relief when Leo finally let go of me and once I had my opening I climbed out just as quick as Angel did. 

I needed some air. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ] 
> 
> Hello, Hello, Hello!
> 
> Firstly before I start anything on what I wanna say-- I am so very sorry for all the sex and shit. But like, I'm in a super big/hormonal mood for some Turtlecest scenes that involve different things, like Leo fucking Mikey and of course the tension between the geeky Donatello and his mate but come on, I make it look so good!
> 
> Plus, if you don't like it, don't read it. 
> 
> Simple. 
> 
> Anyways. I planned on starting this novel a week after I finished the first one, but I'm having one of those adrenaline rushes for writing right about now. This is the second chapter I've published in one day besides five in one day and like that's the most I've done in a long-ass time. 
> 
> Also, a little bit of a heads up on Smut Warnings and crap like that-- I will not be putting them in anymore. (Why?) Because I wanna be a little evil bitch and surprise you with that shit. 
> 
> It's just who I am. I love these four that much! But yeah, apologies for all the smut and uh, the possible spam that has happened in the last five hours maybe. We are currently clocking four thousand characters. The last chapter was between two and three so, sue me! 
> 
> Anyway-- again. I love you guys, I love you for supporting me and my novel. And of course, my obsession! 
> 
> I'll see ya in the next one, twerps!
> 
> And hey! 
> 
> Cowabunga! 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz
> 
> P.s I'm adding the endnotes from this chapter on Wattpad because of the heads up I give on Smut Warnings. I will continue to let those types of things be surprises for my viewers. Enjoy!


	5. ᴮˡᵃᶻᵉʳᵒᵈ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ |||ⱽ

ᴮˡᵃᶻᵉʳᵒᵈ

[ Donatello ]

Dizzy. Spinning. 

Okay- just breathe! It's so simple. 

The air outside the car was a lot warmer than I expected. Dammit.

"I think, D is gonna faint," I heard my younger brother tease after hopping out of the vehicle to catch up with me. 

"He's just got blue balls, Mike, no biggy" Raphael laughs and I almost punch him. 

"You guys comin'?" Angel yells from the top of a staircase that almost looked like a subway entrance. But no, it led to a door down three flights of stairs. 

Leo was staying far behind in the group. Which I was thankful for. I couldn't help but feel relieved. Maybe I could actually focus. But what was I saying? I'm going to a freaking club! To a party! 

This definitely wasn't my scene. I could see it being the others. But for me, I would have rathered to stay home instead. 

Just breathe, and stay away from anything that could potentially harm you. Like, cocaine, or vodka. Anything flammable. Crap like that, Don. 

"This is gonna be so cool!" Mikey jumped, skipping along behind the teenaged girl we now considered an ally. 

"You have no idea!" Angel agreed, pounding on a metal door. And seconds afterward, a tall man with dark glasses opened it. But it was basically like a vault door. Where the heck were we?

"Angel Godi, back again?" the man questioned while she handed him a stack of money. 

Again, wasn't she fourteen?

"Of course, you know I can't get enough of this place, Javier! I brought a couple of friends tonight. I'm sure what I gave ya covered their expenses, right?" 

"We uh, we could have paid," Leo says out of nowhere, but he was out of sight. 

"It's totally cool you guys, I got you! Anyways, are we in?" Angel asks the burly man. 

The bouncer glances over us all and grimaces at Raph and Mikey's outfits, "A bunch of turtles. Which look, pretty damn awesome, so yeah, you're in. No more trouble, Angel," Javier warns Angel and stepping aside as she signals him the finger and rolls inside. 

Everyone was quiet and once we stepped through the door, I could hear the pounding of music not far from where we were. It was definitely house music or some type of Electronica. 

Inside was dark, but neon signs and long ropes of lightning were hung up everywhere, displaying quite a few quotes that either meant something personal or was just stupid to think about. 

We continued to follow Angel until we reached two double doors, and when she opened them, everything-- and I'm talking everything was right there in front of your face. 

The building-- or place, was bigger than I thought. Lights were flashing in millions of colors. People were dancing in cages and on stages, and even swinging around poles between women and men. The place wasn't homophobic which was kind of, Good?

"Holy fuck," Raph practically gasps. But I could barely hear him over the music. Though the good thing about being a turtle, no matter how far we were from one another, we could always hear when something bad was happening or at least bad enough. 

There were more than three bars. Couches with tables and chairs were sort of mix-matched in different places, and the room was completely loaded. I glanced up, letting the lights reflect off of my glasses and up top, there was another lounging area. With another dance floor, I assumed. It was probably the VIP balcony. 

"So, you guys want a drink or what?" Angel beams from ear to ear, and I quickly shook my head. 

"Hell Yeah!" Mikey shouts, but Leo completely interferes and steps in. 

"I told you no drinking tonight!" he scolds, making Mikey pout. 

"Aw, don't be such a party pooper, Leonardo!" Angel whines, pulling on Mikey's arm. Stating that these two have created some sort of bond. "It's a party! A nightclub for god sakes! You can't come to one of those without having a drink. At least one," she explains. 

Leo glances up at Raph who returned the look, "The last time he drank, he got all nutty" Raph says, bracing his hands on the railing that overlooked the dance floor. 

"Well, every club has drinks that don't have too much alcohol in it, so, let's go see our options! Mikey and Leo, you are comin' with me to the bar, and Donnie, Raph, make yourselves at home. Don't be shy and definitely don't be afraid to shake your butt a little, because they play some rockin' tunes!" Angel explains again, totally not making things even more awkward than they already were for me. 

But she did kidnap Leo and get him away from me. 

Once me and my elder brother were alone, I remained to stand close to him to avoid any confrontation from other people. But the looks bystanders were giving the both of us didn't exactly prove anything. Though these looks weren't bad. They weren't horrified, or scared. 

Maybe they actually thought we looked cool. Like that Javier guy did. 

"So, what exactly are we meant to be doin' here, Donnie?" Raph asked speaking directly into my ear so I'd hear him a little better. 

I laughed, "Like I'm meant to know, Raph! I've never been to one of these," 

"And I have? There must be at least a thousand people in here," 

"Likely more than that," 

"How many do ya think?" 

"I dunno," I huffed. 

"Ballpark it," Raph grins down at me, making me roll my eyes in annoyance. 

"Fine!" I crossed my arms, "I'd say at least twenty-five hundred or more," 

"Thirty-one hundred actually," someone announced next to me, nearly startling my shell. But due to the loud music blaring in my ears, it wasn't a chance. 

"Oh," I answered to the man who was obviously not too shy about his appearance. 

He was wearing some sort of lingerie outfit with a bunny ear headpiece, and the tail. 

"I'm sorry- didn't mean to scare you. I'm the owner. My name is Arnold Jones, but people call me Hun," he smiles, flashing his teeth at me while stretching his hand out to shake on it. 

I hesitated at first but drawn out my hand after a second and gently shook his hand, "It's fine, nice to um, meet you," 

"Wow, cool hands dude, bet that took you forever to make," he gushes, analyzing my hand before I withdrew it and shoved both into my pants pockets. 

"Yeah, uh, we like to go to a lot of carnivals. Show off the suits you know," Raph steps in with a sarcastic smirk on his face. 

"I think you mean, Cons, Raphael," I corrected making him glare at me, but I giggled at his face.

"Oh, right! Right! People love those Comic Con things, but hey you guys went to another level. Why not show it off in a nightclub, huh? Tell me though, is this your first time?" Hun asks with another smile but all while raising up a fruity drink in his hand and sipping on it. 

I could practically smell the liquor from here. 

"First time? Nah, man. We've been to other joints. But uh, not as cool as this one," Raph answers, as I glance up at him but I nod in agreement anyway, still feeling awkward as crap. 

"Hey thanks, dude! But no, no, I mean like, is this your first time here? Not many people know about it unless they hear about it through friends. I saw you come in with Angel Godi. That kid man, she's a keeper," he gushes taking another drink from his glass. 

"Angel?" I ask, "Yeah, but she's only like fourteen, right?" 

"Fuck no, dude, she's like twenty-something" he laughs almost choking on his drink.

Me and Raph shared another look, but with a quirk on my own lips this time. 

This guy wasn't very smart. 

"Right," I smiled. 

"So, I didn't catch you guys' names, I heard a Ralph in there or something?" Hun says, with another laugh. 

"Raphael," my brother snips. 

"I'm Donatello, but my brothers just call me, Donnie," 

"How about Big Daddy and Little Daddy" Hun grins, making me flush. 

Oh no. 

"Haha, that's funny!" Raph tries to agree, though I saw something in his eyes that signaled he sort of liked being called that. After all, it did fit him. 

Was I developing a Daddy Kink, right here, right now? Gosh, Donatello. You're seriously in need of a fix tonight!

"We should find the others," I state, grasping Raph's arm, "It was nice meeting you. Really nice place you have here, Arnold," 

"That's Hun to you, honey!" he yells after me. 

Raph starts laughing once we're alone again and I punch him in the arm. "What? Did ya just want me to say we were total virgins at this shit?" 

I frowned, "Well, no," 

"Alright. Don't be punchin' me then," Raph shakes off looking around us. His eyes were wandering everywhere and so was mine. I couldn't shake the nasty feeling in my shell. 

"You guys see where Mikey went?" Leo asks out of nowhere and I just stared at him and Raph. I wanted to sink into my shell and hide. Under these lights, even with how silly Raph looked, they both were stunning. 

"You lost him?" Raph barked over the music. "Course ya did,"

"I didn't lose him, alright? I just think he's a little out of hand. We were at the bar, which was, strange. But he and Angel ordered tonics. The bartender said that it only had a spoon of tequila in it. Do you guys know what that is?" 

My eyes widened, seeing that I was the only one who knew what it was. 

"That's one of the strongest tonics they could ever put in a drink. Mikey probably doesn't even know that. He just wants to have fun," I sighed rubbing my eyes beneath my glasses, "This isn't going to end well,"

"We gotta find him. Who knows where Angel took him," Leo agrees looking around, but his eyes were lingering on something I couldn't quite catch. 

"Maybe we should just try to have fun too," Raph then remarked, reminding me of my surroundings. 

"Donnie is carrying Raph, you know this," Leo warns off with a steer of anger in his voice. 

"Yeah, don't remind me, but come on- even if Donnie can't drink, then we can, at least one or two. I didn't particularly enjoy the feelin' of bein' totally swamped the first time, but like, we don't have to get drunk to have fun. Do we?" Raph goes on to Leo as if I'm not even standing here. 

But it made sense. If we didn't come here to have fun. Then what was the reason? To stand around and look like losers? 

"He has a point, Leo," I announced, putting my hands in my pockets again. 

Leo stares up at me for a minute, as if he's fighting with his own thoughts. Which I knew he was. He then nodded, "Alright, alright, fine. One drink. Nothing more than one, Raph," 

"Great! And in the process maybe we can find my boyfriend," Raph shrugs while walking off leaving me stunned. 

Did he just say that?

Outloud? 

"You okay?" Leo questions concerned while interrupting my thoughts. 

"Oh, um, y-yeah, just great. What're you gonna get?" I asked in return while we made our way towards the bar. 

"I'm not sure. There are hundreds of options. Sex on the beach sounds nice," Leo laughs, making me blush for the millionth time today. 

"Hah, that's an odd name for a drink. I wonder what's in it," 

But then, my mind suddenly turned into a complete blur. 

One minute I was walking with Leo, the next, the bar. I remember ordering water. Just water. Was it water? It looked like water. Was water a codename for some stupid alcoholic drink in this place? It wasn't that hard. Getting water wasn't that fucking hard!

Oops. 

I said water way too many times in that sentence. 

The music was back, but it sounded better. How did it sound better? A minute ago I was thinking that this song was awful but now, it was great! 

I felt some type of warmth. It was heat, this heat in the back of my throat. Burning and aching but maybe it was the drink? Again, I ordered water. Just water. Faucet water. 

I saw the lights again. Flashing in my face and bringing me back down to earth. I was standing in the middle of the dance floor now. People were all around me and the buttons on my shirt were halfway undone. But not completely thankfully. 

I was moving to the beat. I didn't stop even though my head was spinning again. It felt good. This, it was good. The music was basically pouring on top of me and the speed was a rush. 

I felt someone brush up against me from behind. Though I didn't know who it was, I continued. I didn't know what I was doing yet I kept moving and falling in with the beat of the speakers. 

"You can really move!" said a feminine voice, and when she spoke, I immediately turned to face her. The girl was kind of small and really short. But she seemed to be dressed like a fairy or something. I couldn't quite make it out right now. 

"Thanks!" I responded, tilting my head back just as her hands landed on my plastron. 

Wait. 

"A guy that can move, a turtle even," she giggles, "Reptiles are pretty sexy" 

I glanced down at her, still moving but not really knowing how to respond. The song in the club changes and the beat to this one was even better than the last. It was deeper, more experienced. 

"Come on, let's dance, hottie," the brunette giggles again. Which sounded sort of annoying and even for a second when I got a good look at her face, she kind of reminded me of April. 

I blinked rapidly and shook my head, "I don't really dance," 

"But you're doing it right now!" she gasps, "You're so good," 

Her hands were all over me now. Moving over my chest, caressing my neck, shoulders all while curling her fingers into the fabric of my shirt. 

Shit.

I felt a second hand on my arm, and as soon as whoever grabbed me, I was pulled away from the girl a good short distance, before they shouted, "Sorry- but he's off the market!" 

When I steadied myself again, I almost fell forward and braced my hands on the broad shoulders of whoever saved me and when I blinked a few good times again, I noticed that it was Leo. 

Thank God. 

"Leo," I breathed, hugging into him, "Where were you?" 

"I don't know, to be honest," he answered, keeping me close to his chest, "Like Mikey- we went to get a drink, and then you disappeared, so did, Raph. Hopefully, nobody pisses him off," 

"I seriously can't remember how I got here," I admitted licking my lips. 

"Yeah, I can't either. Did you order anything?" 

"Water,"

"Maybe it was spiked," he laughs leaning into me. 

"Spiked?" I frowned with a pout, letting my glasses droop from my nose until Leo scoots them back up with his green finger and nods at me, "That's just great," 

"Yeah, so great that I can't let you out of my sight now," he grins. 

"Wait, did you order anything?" 

"I beer, why?" 

"Oh, okay. You don't feel anything?" I continued to question, letting Leo hold me from falling over. 

"No. I can't get drunk from one beer, Don. Do you wanna sit? Maybe rest a minute?" Leo asks, rubbing the edges of my shell making me hum in response. 

"Dance," was all I could say. 

"Dance? You wanna dance?" Leo laughs, gripping my waist, "Fine, let's dance," he agrees, making me smile. 

"Let's let loose, as Raph would say" I slurred with a giggle, pulling on Leo's hand until we were a good middle distance in between the dance floor and soon his hands found their way to my thighs. Just barely missing my tail that was straining inside of my pants. I had nearly forgotten about it. 

"Then let loose, Don," Leo says into my ear reminding me straight from the car ride of what he started and now he was going to end it. 

The music began to move through my body again. Kicking my adrenaline into gear and shooting it straight to the top of the charts. My heart was pounding in my chest and Leo's musk was already swarming in front of me. His smell, I could practically taste it. 

I gripped on to his neck, and pulled him into a heating kiss and immediately his tongue found it's way in and twined with mine. Everything was so hot. The room, the tension, and the man in front of me. God, he was so fine. Not even the amounts of science could compare to how my brothers could make me feel. 

But then all things came to a stop when something was buzzing against my thigh. Leo quickly pulled from me and reached for his pocket and out came his phone. 

"Raph said, the second floor," he said swallowing the taste of his tongue to calm himself. I could tell he was holding back now. He knew I'd give in at any minute. 

"Let's go then," I bit back licking my lips again while Leo grasped my hand and pulled me with him. But making slow steps, according to help me from falling over. 

We reached another damn staircase, and when the bouncer in front saw us, he stood out of the way as if he was prepared for us to come by. Leo gave me an odd look and continued going until we got to the top floor and across the room, I saw both of my brothers. Including Angel. 

Mikey and she were dancing on top of a table made of glass. It instantly began to give me anxiety. Why was I being such a loser, right now? 

What?

I kept quiet as we walked closer. Whatever was in that drink, it was making me think differently. 

"Where the fuck have you, dudes, been?" Mikey yells all over the room when he sees us. 

His eyes were strangely wide and his pupils were dilated. As if he just drank a whole gallon of sugar. But I doubted in the back of my mind that that was the reason behind his actions. 

"Yeah, we've been havin' so much fun without cha!" Angel cheers continuing to dance on the table that seemed to handle both her and my brother's weight shockingly well. 

To the right in the corner on a leather sofa, Raph was sitting but from what I could see from here. He was smoking something. 

Holy shit!

"Raph, what the hell do you think you're doing?" Leo asked once we got close enough. 

He looked up at us both. Eyes flashing between me and Leo. "What's it look like?" he simply answered but is calmer than I've ever seen him after Leo practically scolded him. My brother exhaled a cloud of smoke that quickly surrounded us. It smelt of herbs. 

Marijuana?

"It looks like you're breaking a major goddamn rule! I told you only one drink!" Leo went on after I had sat down a couple of inches from Raph who rolled his eyes. 

He wasn't getting angry- or irritated. 

"Does it look like I'm drinkin', Leo?" Raph answers, sticking the lit cigarette shaped paper in between his lips and the end glowed once he inhaled again. "I had a few, but then the girl over there introduced me to this," 

Angel. 

"Jesus Raph, You're smoking fucking weed! Are you insane!" Leo literally screams in his face, but the other doesn't react one bit. He sits and just stares up at our leader with absolute no reaction in his face. 

"Yes," Raph answers breaking out into a heap of laughter. 

"Has Mikey smoked? He sure acts like it!" 

"Nah, brah, not at all!" Mikey giggles, waving his hands around with Angel, "Maybe a little bit of that stuff, uh, what was it called again, Angel-Cakes?" 

"Ectasy!" Angel answers over the music, stomping her feet on the glass table. 

Holy shit. 

I continued to not have words for this moment. I knew that this would happen. I knew we'd be around this type of stuff. But actually doing it? 

Leo just shakes his head and slumps on the couch next to me and reaches for the bottle on the table that my brother wasn't dancing on. From what I could see, the bottle was clear and had a V on the front of it. 

He tilted the bottle and drank whatever was left of the liquid inside. 

"That's it, Leo," Raph grins, "You wanna hit, bro?" 

Leo glances at me, then at our brother who was offering him a taste of what he was spewing down into his lungs. Leo seemed to of given up trying at this point and took the blunt from Raph and took a couple of breaths from it and sat back on the couch. 

How was he not coughing? Wasn't that what you do? 

Not always you idiot. Your turn!

I wanted to smack myself. My thoughts were literally giving me an attitude and even telling me what to do now. 

I looked at Leo who was now offering me a taste and I quickly shook my head, "No!" 

Just then, Mikey jumps down from the table, "Who else needs to pee?" he questions. 

I couldn't think of a better reason to raise my hand any quicker, but I did and got up from the sofa, followed by my brothers. God, why did they need to as well? I felt like I practically didn't know them at this point!

Donatello, lighten up, this is a one-night thing- fuck, drink some more, smoke something! Hell, even put something up your goddamn ass for once and enjoy yourself!

Jesus Christ. 

My hands began shaking once I got to the bathroom. All four of us piled in while there were only two bathroom stalls. But I realized by the time I got in there, I didn't actually need to pee. I just wanted a minute to myself and maybe talk some sense into Michelangelo. But now, I could see that that wasn't going to happen. 

Mikey went into one of the stalls and Leo followed into the second to relieve themselves. I moved to the sinks and splashed my face with some water before wiping my glasses with my shirt that was still unbuttoned halfway. 

When I noticed in the mirror, I quickly fixed that problem. But there was another. I looked even different than before. The clothes didn't make any difference now. But from the drinking- or whatever was in that drink, I looked, bad. Really bad. 

Irresponsible!

When I met my own eyes in the mirror, I noticed Raph staring at me from the wall he was leaning on. My guess, he didn't need to pee either.

He was giving me a look I was familiar with. But scared of and enjoyed all in one go. It was that same look from my dream. The look I kept thinking about for hours after we had mated. 

But I could be fooled. Maybe it was just the drugs. Yeah. Hallucination was a side effect of being drunk and or- um, high. But all while being strangely horny and turned on. 

Mikey came out of his side once he was finished and scrubbed his hands in the sink next to me. 

I looked over and couldn't help myself but ask, "You okay?"

"Never better!" he smiles excitedly, "Why?" 

I shook my head just as Leo finished up and came out, repeating Mikey's actions. I stood in silence as did the rest of us until Mikey said he wanted to get back to partying but when he went for the door, Raph blocked him and secured the lock, which looked like a dead-bolt. 

Shit.

"Party?" Raph scoffed, "We can party in here, Mike," he continued obviously sounding out of it. 

I needed to get the fuck out of here. 

"Come on, Raphie!" Mikey whined, stomping his feet on the concrete floor, "Angel is waiting for me," 

Our older brother got closer to his mate and pushed him against the wall, "That kid, can wait," 

I swallowed thickly before going for the door myself, but Leo grabbed me by the arm, making me flush deeply at his touch, "Stay," he whispered, "I don't really feel all that great," 

I stared at him and sighed, "I don't wanna be in here when Mikey and Raph start banging!" 

"Why?" Leo simply asks with smoldering eyes. 

"I-I, well, because, it's weird," I lied. 

"Or hot," Leo says reaching for the buttons on my shirt, playing with them. 

"You need to lie down. All of you do, and I need an ice pack," I admitted holding my head hearing the sounds of my brothers making out now. 

I tried to avoid whatever was going on between them. But I couldn't help but think about my dream again. That thing has become one of my obsessions. 

We were a pack. A posse of lovers and mates in one circle within the clouds. It was all so good until it was ripped away from me. 

Leo's hand was creeping at my neck now, trying to get one of the buttons undone, but I pushed it away and shook my head, "No, not now, Leo," I sighed again, staring at the ceiling. 

Soon, Mikey was going to start making noises and that was going to make things even worse. 

I couldn't just stand here, not looking- it was awkward beyond belief. Yet I took a glance at what was happening and sure enough, my brothers were officially in stage two of what they planned to do. Although, I don't think Mikey wanted to. But with Raph, who could resist?

What?

I bit at my lip, trying to pull my eyes away just as Raph bent Mikey over the sink, penetrating him. 

God, I need out. Right now. Right fucking now-- shit, stop cursing! Donnie! 

I grabbed my head reaching for the door again, but this time, Leo stopped me in a much different way. 

My brothers' moans were echoing all around me now. Leo shoved me against the stall walls, making them rattle and shake with how hard I fell against it, though, it didn't hurt. I was full-on panting now and Leo looked like a blue devil. 

He reached for his pants and got them unfastened in seconds. 

"Harder, Raphie!" Mikey churred, gripping the sink in front of him to keep from falling forward as my brother plowed into him and grunting as he did so. 

I couldn't help but watch them now, then back at Leo who grabbed the collar of my shirt and smashed his lips against mine. Our mouths molded together in a fierce fight for dominance. He gripped the material of my top and ripped it open. Buttons flew everywhere and something triggered inside of me. 

Let Go, Donatello. 

I quickly grabbed Leo's top and did the same thing as he did to mine. He was grabbing at my pants now and when he realized I wasn't wearing underwear, he seemed relieved. I practically jumped into his arms, letting him slam me against the wall again but this time, I moaned with the chills shooting down my spine. 

My legs pulled Leo in closer by his lower half and instantly I felt the pressure of his cock against me, "Leo, please," I begged, scratching the back of his neck. 

"Yeah, you want it, huh?" Leo rasps in response, pushing into me and forcing a loud gasp from my throat. 

"Want it so badly!" I admitted, no longer holding back due to my mind fighting with me. My brothers having sex just over my mate's shoulder and then his sick words. 

All of this, it was sick. It was disgusting but it all felt so damn right. 

"Gonna give it to you, baby" Leo pants, pressing his lips to my throat just below my chin. 

"Yes!" I moaned, tilting my head all the way back until I couldn't anymore. 

"This is so hot!" Mikey calls on the brink of cumming from the sounds of it. 

Leo starts to hit harder and faster, slamming into bits of me I didn't think I had. 

"Donnie," Leo churrs against me, twisting his fingers around my hip bones, nailing even harder, making the stall behind me make even more noise, "Holy fuck, Donnie, I'm gonna cum!" 

I grabbed ahold of Leo's shell and let my mouth fall open in a silent moan. Leo was thrusting deeper and deeper until everything suddenly blossomed and bloomed like a firework exploding into the sky. 

"Leonardo," I gasped loudly unprepared, "R-Right there! Shit!" 

Leo was panting heavily against my neck, milking himself for all he was worth until he thrust one final time and I was forced to release my climax on both of us. I couldn't hear my other brothers anymore, and soon, I couldn't even hear my own thoughts. 

Silence and Relief were all I needed. 

I breathed in deeply and let my eyes slip closed. My body began to get weaker, all while I felt some pain in my stomach. I didn't mind. I didn't care about anything anymore. 

"Donnie?" I heard a familiar voice say but it was muffled. 

Mr. Sandman, take me away!

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings To All TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> Once again, I am terribly sorry for all of the smut you've been currently witnessing (although I've enjoyed writing it because I'm a sick bastard)
> 
> But anyway I wanted to explain what exactly the point of this chapter was. 
> 
> The Turtles are so used to a routine they've been repeating for years. Which was fight the bad guys and never relax. For the second time since the last chapter, I based this one in Donatello's point of view (again) because he is the majority of the one who never, ever, sits down and takes it easy. 
> 
> This was one of those moments where all four of them step completely out of their boundaries and let things get really, really wild and messed up. 
> 
> They aren't teenagers anymore in my story and all due to being in their twenties, (except for Mikey he's nineteen still, but don't worry we will have a birthday chapter for him coming up really soon!) things like this are bound to happen. 
> 
> In real life, I have never been to a nightclub or drank alcohol or even done any sort of drug that could fuck me up, but I, unfortunately, know a lot about it. I know more than I should let me just put it that way but um, I really enjoyed the idea of this one. It's really different and definitely isn't something that will continue to happen. This was sort of a one-time-type-of-thing and maybe in the future, it'll happen again, but not for a while. 
> 
> A lot more shit goes down after this chapter ends. Like, so much. I have many plans for this book and it is a lot more than I had in mind for the first one. I don't think I've ever been so into writing like this in ages. I wrote out and published two chapters in one day and I'm always getting ideas for you guys!
> 
> As usual in my stories, there will be Easter Eggs and hints from here and there. 
> 
> Let's see if you can predict the future better than I can. 
> 
> Cowabunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	6. Sᵉˡᶠ ⱽᵃʳⁱᵉᵗʸ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ⱽ

Sᵉˡᶠ ⱽᵃʳⁱᵉᵗʸ

[ Leonardo ]

Loud bangs and soft smiles from the one I loved flashed through my mind. The images were flashing a mile a minute and gaining speed in my head like someone hit the fast forward button.

They were moving so fast that I couldn't even see them anymore. 

Something was drumming in my body and I couldn't tell if it was my heart or my head. 

Though, whichever it was, it was pounding hard somewhere deep. It hurt and with every waiting second, things began to come clear. I felt my body twitch at my awake and I couldn't make out the things in front of me. 

Where the heck was I?

I tried opening my eyes and when I finally peeled them open, I could see some lights, but everything was pretty dim. Though these lights weren't your regular ones. They were flashing from red, blue and pink. 

As soon as I saw them, a large lightning bolt of pain shot up my spine and into my head. I quickly grabbed my skull and winced at the harsh pounding that fully woke me up. 

"Hey-" someone dragged as if they were annoyed, "Hey man, it's time to go, the party is over,"

"What?" I croaked, massaging my temple and blinking a couple of times and glancing up towards a man who I assumed worked here. His badge was pinned to his shirt which read out the name, Derek. 

"Get up! You guys have to go. We're closing the place down," he answered with a roll of his eyes and wandered off with a broom in his hand. 

"Party?" I groaned silently and let my head fall face back down on the concrete floor. 

How did I even get here, and why am I sleeping on the floor?

I slowly tried to turn myself over and sit up, and when I finally managed to, everything began to click back in my head. The place around me. The nightclub, the costume party-- wait, what did I even do?

I glanced around the room, seeing all four of my brothers messily placed around the room. We were up on some type of balcony and the entire area was a complete wreck. 

Donatello was inches from me, but instead of sleeping on the concrete floor, he managed to land himself on a carpet of some sort. The shirt he was wearing was in tatters across his body and even his pants were undone, which caused me to notice that mine was open too. 

Did we, have sex?

Donnie's glasses were eschewed on his face, but they were fine from what I could tell. As for Raph and Mike, those two were lying across a wrap-around sofa that was made out of red and black leather. 

Mikey somehow managed to only get his legs on the couch, while the other half of his body was on the floor, admitting unbelievably loud snores. Raph being the giant he is was sleeping across the couch on his stomach, while one leg and arm were hanging off the side. 

Alcohol bottles and countless amounts of cups and empty glasses were around the room, on the tables, the floors spilled over and I could even smell the faint scent of many different drugs I didn't really want to name off at the very moment. 

What the hell did we do?

I moved to my feet as the room began to spin, but I kept my composure and definitely could recognize the hangover swimming in my head. I drank last night. What did I even drink? Why did I even drink? Why the fuck did I even agree to this crap?

I moved towards Donnie and carefully shook him by his arm. He didn't stir so I shook him a little harder, "Don, we gotta go," I said, wincing again at my head. 

He hummed from slumber and fluttered his eyes open at me, "Huh?" he spoke, sounding groggy beyond belief. 

"Get up," I huffed quickly fastening my pants, "Fix your clothes," 

I moved towards Raph and shook him just as hard and with less difficulty, he rose from sleep and groaned a loud moan and covered his eyes, "Ah, what the fuck?" 

"Gotta get up," I said to him rubbing my eyes. 

"Damn, for what, man?" he questioned trying to sit up on the couch, almost slipping once or twice, "Where the fuck even am I?"

"You don't remember?"

"I do," I heard Donnie say making me look towards him. The look on his face was almost horrifying at the least. He even looked a little greener than usual. 

"Get Michelangelo up, we need to get out of this place and figure out what the hell went down last night. There's too much alcohol around here and if I drank as much as I think, then we are all gonna be in big damn trouble," I sighed, peering around the lounge. 

"D-Did I drink?" Donnie questioned; as if I knew.

"I don't know, I don't remember anything except for coming here. That was the last thing I saw," I answered delicately as my head continued to pound. 

"Oh god," Donatello almost sobbed, and even for a second, I forgot what he could have been so upset about. I knew the answer but I couldn't bring myself to think about it further.

"Ow, dude!" my little brother squeaked as Raph landed a slap on his leg which immediately got him up, "The fuck was that for, huh?" he barked, trying to get my bigger sibling back but he failed since he was in such an odd position. 

I glanced around the room again and saw the stairs, "Gather yourselves and let's leave," 

"D, what time is it?" Mikey asked Donnie who was as quiet as a mouse. But he heard him and swallowed thickly from what I guessed the emotion building up right about now. 

He fiddled with his watch and fixed his glasses, "It's nearly noon," he answered. 

"Fix ya mask, numbnuts," Raph told Mikey who's bandana was halfway off his face. 

"It's day time, which means we'll need to move quickly-- can you guys manage that?" I questioned looking in between my siblings who looked like complete hell. They gave me silent answers which meant a definite No. "Once we're in the clear and back at the penthouse, we need to have a talk about this,"

"About what exactly?" Raph grumbled stroking a hand over his face, "We got fucked up last night, Leo. There's nothin' more to discuss," 

"That's exactly why we need to talk! Now let's go!" I ordered and went for the stairs which led down to the ground floor. I immediately spotted the exit and headed straight for it. 

All four of us managed to slip out without being seen and once we were outside, the pain in my head only worsened due to the sunlight. We made a bee-line for the penthouse, not really remembering where it was located. But with the help of Donnie, we got back safe enough. 

"I think I'm gonna puke," Mikey whined, clasping a hand over his plastron. 

"I needa get this stupid fuckin' outfit off, or else I'm about ta strangle one of ya," Raph went on, being the grump he is and went straight for his room down the hall.

"Once you're done with that, I want each of you in the living room," I said, noticing Donnie's stare. 

"How can you not remember if I drank?" 

I looked at him and shrugged, "If you did, I'm sure everything is okay"

"Okay?" Donnie scoffed, "You think all of this is okay, Leo? I'm carrying an egg and I drank- and went to a silly party! I could ruin my chances here. I feel completely irresponsible!" 

I softened a bit at the mention of the egg and only grimaced at the thought alone. 

"You probably drank a little bit- it's an egg? What type of damage can you do to an egg" I said, trying to reassure him, but not really caring about this at the moment due to not really being on board with the whole baby thing yet. 

"You act like I don't know what you're thinking, Leo. It's funny if you think I don't know! I know you hate this, but it's yours! It's all of yours and that may be weird to you, but I wanted it! And if you gave a crap about it at all, you'd at least show a bit more emotion and dedication towards the simple fact of me possibly killing the fetus!" Donatello ranted, sending a knife into my heart.

He then left the room while slamming the door to his bedroom which echoed throughout the entire place. 

I couldn't deal with this right now. I couldn't even think clearly so why was I bothering with my brothers at this worse of a time? I was an idiot to think of going to that party was even the slightest good. It never ended well with either of us, so what did I expect? 

A whole hour went by before my brothers returned to the living room. I didn't mind the silence, nor did I care about being left to my thoughts. I was told to take some medication for my head from Jameson, the butler. 

I nearly had forgotten about him. I wasn't used to having someone who was hired to help you. I didn't think it was necessary but I guessed I'd have to either get used to it or leave. Though, thinking about it now, maybe I could speak to John about it. 

As soon as I lied my head on one of the sofas pillows and closed my eyes for only a second, Mikey bounced into the room and parked himself on the other couch. There were ironically four couches in this living room. I had never seen anything more ridiculous. 

"Where's the other two?" I questioned him while opening my right eye to peer at him, and he stubbornly shrugged. 

"I dunno, dude. I think, Raph passed out again and Donnie is totally pissed with you,"

I reached up with my hand and caressed the front of my temple, rubbing it slightly and becoming completely frustrated. Why the hell can't they take one order I give them into consideration? They never listen! I don't even see the point in being a leader anymore. 

Maybe you shouldn't be. 

The words sat there in my brain for only a few seconds until I decided to finally get up and leave Mikey to himself in the lounge, but beforehand, I stop and point at him, "Don't move," 

"Yeah, yeah," he exhaled twirling his finger around the end of his bandana tails. 

I made it to Raph's room and didn't bother knocking on the door. When I walked in, he wasn't on his bed, which was surprisingly neat. But then I just figured it was Jameson again. I then suddenly felt sorry for him if he took care of Mikey's room. 

I let out a sigh only to realize the shower in the bathroom was running. 

Just go in there. 

I debated with that decision only immediately. 

Raph was undergoing a hangover. We all were. But if it was anyone you didn't wanna bother during one of those, it would be him. Though, I needed him to be with the rest of us. I needed to have a talk with everybody about what happened. I needed to remember everything a little bit clearer. And the only way I was going to get my answers, was through my brothers. 

Including my so-called partner. 

I took slow steps towards the bathroom, and the door was open by only inches, which was kind of relieving for me. I couldn't for even a minute figure out why I was nervous to talk to my own brother. We had already been through so much together but why was I nervous? I wasn't meant to get nervous. It wasn't in my nature. 

I reached out and pushed the tips of my fingers against the frame of the door and slowly pushed it open. The room was swamped with steam, and the heat was already smothering enough for me, but I couldn't stop now. I was already in. 

"Raph?" I managed to say while hoping he doesn't yell at me for not knocking.

"Get out, Leo," he drawled from behind the glass doors that were so steamed up, I couldn't even see him. 

"I need you out there," 

"And I need you ta leave me the fuck alone!" he growled, letting the sounds of his own voice echo off of the bathroom walls. 

"Stop screwing around!" I barked back pulling the shower door open, not caring if it angers him further. I needed him to focus at least once. 

Raph's shoulders rose up then down with the sight of me interrupting him. I was, for once frightened by him, but I couldn't let my guard go now. Even if he was dripping wet and completely nude right in front of me. 

He was glaring at me, "You're about ten seconds from gettin' your teeth knocked down your throat, Leo,"

"Cut the tough act, Raphael! I fucking need you out there with me! Donatello is pissed at me, and Mikey is just riddled with his hangover still," I ignored, reaching into the shower and switching the water off. 

"It doesn't surprise me that you got Don upset with ya again. You've been a dick about this whole egg thing" Raph answers just before climbing out of the shower and toweling himself down.

I splashed my face with some water and sighed heavily hearing my brother's words. I saw him staring in the mirror, "You can't say too much. Have you forgotten that it's yours too,"

My brother released a large breath of air and stormed into his bedroom, leaving me to myself in the mirror. I then peered at myself above the sink, not being able to understand how I ended up here. 

I wanted to punch my own reflection. But I refrained and left the room to go back into the bathroom, reminding Raph to meet the rest of us in the living room. 

By the time I was about to sit back down, I heard the doorbell ring. Jameson appeared from the kitchen and immediately went for the door down the hall. 

I figured that it was John or one of his boys. I was beginning to wonder when he was going to send us on another run. I felt like I needed it right now. 

"Leonardo, two men have made a surprise visit and have asked just for you," the butler announced just seconds before he returned to the lounge and when I looked up, the two men in behind him wasn't exactly the men you'd find roaming around in New York City.

The Tribunal Had Arrived.

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	7. ᴬ ᴳᵃᵗʰᵉʳⁱⁿᵍ ᵀᵒ ᴼⁿˡʸ Sʰᵃᵗᵗᵉʳ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ⱽᴵ

ᴬ ᴳᵃᵗʰᵉʳⁱⁿᵍ ᵀᵒ ᴼⁿˡʸ Sʰᵃᵗᵗᵉʳ

[ Michelangelo ]

What even was the date today? 

I couldn't think clearly and I felt like I could catch about a million Zs at this point. I wish I could remember when I passed out last night. I wish I could remember everything I did, but nope. My memory was wiped clean somehow. 

I do remember the killer music and busting some moves with Angel. 

But wait- Angel. Where the heck even is she? I didn't see her before we left. I was starting to think she just ditched us back there, and now, I was even realizing the reason for the number of people that Godi dude hires to watch over her. I was still all about fun, but- at this point in time, I was really hoping I didn't do anything more than dance. 

I was zoning in and out of my head when Raph came from the hall, sporting his usual attire, though he had sweat pants on. And damn, did they suit him. 

"Michelangelo!" I heard Leo bark bitterly, totally snapping me back into reality and forcing me to realize what was going on. 

I glanced towards the front entrance and saw two very familiar people standing there. 

I immediately stood up to my feet, nearly falling over in the process, but I managed to greet Gyoji and The Ancient One with a respectful bow just as my older brother did. Though, Raph didn't bother. He was obviously pissed that they were here. 

"Where the hell is, Donatello?" Leo quickly asked Raph and he gave him a slight shrug forcing irritation on Leo's face, but then he turned his attention towards our guests, "Why are you both here?" 

"Did you not receive your letter, Leonardo Son?" The Ancient One, politely asks.

"Yes, Sensei. I did. But you didn't mention anything about when you'd arrive, or even what the purpose of your visit would be," Leo answers while I stood close at Raph's side, still peering around to see if I spot Donatello anywhere. And I didn't.

"I'm sure Gyoji will explain exactly why we are here. Now tell them, you fool," The Ancient One demands while glaring sharply up towards his face. 

"We are here to apologize for our last encounter. Well, I am. I didn't specifically understand what I saw, and I was taught to show disgusts towards people like you--" Gyoji began to explain, but then Raph scoffs loudly and interrupts. Shit. 

"Ya know somethin' man? I don't really give a flyin' fuck what you're here for!" he bursts. 

"Raph!" Leo hisses in his direction, but I knew that it was far too late to stop him now. 

"I am who I am- and so is Leo. We all are, all fuckin' four of us! At first, we thought it was disgustin' too. But that didn't stop me from lovin' who I wanted to love, whether it's my brothers, or not!" 

"Raphael Son, that is the point of our visit," The Ancient One steps in, shutting my brother up in an instant. "We know about your relations. But there is a secret behind all four of you, that we needed to explain face to face. It's a secret your father buried deep and said to never tell you because he thought that neither of you, would take it as well as he predicted. Even I am afraid of the consequences," 

"What else could he have been hidin' from us?" Raph snapped back, balling his fists tightly at the mention of our father. 

"More secrets," I heard Donnie say from the corner of the room and for some reason, I felt even better to have him here during this. It felt incomplete without all four of us. It felt more likely traditional with these types of things. 

Leo almost looked relieved when he heard his mate enter the room. But then he turned his focus back on our guests, "Why exactly are you here, about my father? He was buried, Sensei. Why can't we just let him rest?" Leo asked, sounding a little on edge. 

"I expected this from you. But since Gyoji took almost a month to let me know about what happened between you three, I would have contacted you sooner. This moron had told me you two had just left without reason," The Ancient One explained. 

"Shut it, Raph!" Leo warned off before our brother could say anything and he continued, "Just tell us why you're here. For real!"

The Ancient One looked in between the four of us, possibly reconsidering what he was about to tell us. And from the look on his face and the tension thickening in the air, I was starting to feel sick. My hangover was officially skyrocketing and whatever was going to come up, was going to be messy. And gross. 

As seconds went by- I was feeling even sicker, but right when I was about to make a joke and lighten the mood, the cat was let out of the bag. 

"You four, aren't actually brothers," The Ancient One finally said, but speaking softly to the each of us. 

I placed my hand over my stomach and made a run for the bathroom, not looking back. By the time I got to the closest toilet my food from last night was already spilling over. My throat was starting to burn, and my lungs clinged for life. Everything was a mess, and my entire body was hurting so bad. 

But then it clicked in my head. The words, the sentence I had just heard minutes before I had to puke my guts out. My stomach cramped at the thought and for even a second, I felt my world crumbling around me. 

The memories, the pain, and every single lie I've ever been told crashed on top of my head. The images in my brain were despicably displeasing and became nothing but a dream. I felt like crying or even dying at this point. But I couldn't bring myself to think of leaving them right now. 

I suddenly felt like my whole life was a lie or even the reason behind my existence no longer mattered. I didn't matter, and neither did everything I've ever learned over the years. 

I was nearly twenty and now, I felt like nothing. I felt like I was no longer moving forward. 

"Mikey," Leo said knocking on the door, which made me cringe hard at his presence. I wanted to be left alone. I felt completely out of my shell-zone. "I know you're sick, but-- The Ancient One won't continue his speech unless you're there,"

"Go away! Ugh," I groaned leaning over on my knees, feeling like I'm gonna faint. 

"I'll give you five minutes. Join us again," Leo spoke, sounding less alive in my opinion, but I couldn't really tell the differences this morning- "I'm not asking you to either. So, do as you're told," he then added making me grip the edges of the toilet. 

I wanted to snap. But I couldn't make a scene. At least not until they were gone, then I will. 

I brought myself up to my knees and immediately brushed my teeth with a toothbrush that wasn't mine to wash away the disgust in my mouth. I then splashed my face with some water to maybe wake me up a little bit more, though seconds after I did it, I still felt like shit. 

Dude, when was this hangover going to go away!

I quickly searched the cabinets in the bathroom and popped a few Tylenol for my head and went back into the living room. My brothers were all sitting down, and when Leo noticed my return, he seemed a little lighter beside the current situation. 

Should I even still call them, brothers?

Was this even happening right now? God, I wished this was all just one big damn nightmare. 

"I wanna hear it again," Raph demanded towards our guests right as I sat down next to him. My head started spinning again as if the world was swallowing me whole. 

"Raphael, we've told you three times already!" Gyoji answered with a sigh. 

"Mikey is here now. So, tell the damn story again, before I rip your fuckin' head off!" he practically roared making my skull pound. 

"Jesus, dude! Would you quiet down!" I sharply said, smacking his shoulder. 

"It's simple. You four are legendary- but, your backstory is what covers the reality of who you truly mean to one another as blood-related. At least twenty years ago, you four were just pets people bought as companions," The Ancient One explained, for what I assumed the millionth time since I ran out of the room. 

"Ugh," I groaned, rubbing the tips of my fingers around the sides of my head. That stupid medicine wasn't working for me. 

"I don't understand. We knew that Sensei wasn't our real father- but this. How could it be? Me and my brothers spent years trying to figure out who we were as terrapins, as mutated reptiles. We spent time trying to figure out what our true purpose was growing up, and now, everything just seems so pointless," Leo went on, resting his head in his hands.

"I personally don't believe a word of it!" Raph growled with a low bark in his voice, making me peer at him from the side in the hope he doesn't shout anymore. 

"I'm sorry, Raphael. But it is true," The Ancient One replied with a bow of his head. 

"What about a blood test?" I heard Donnie suggest from the far right of me. He chose to sit all by himself on one of the white sofa's. I personally knew why- but I was worried for him even if I was feeling like total dog shit right now. 

"A blood test?" Leo repeats, making Donnie nod. 

"We could just confirm it. Though, we don't want to make you guys out as liars. But this is far too much to handle. I haven't even let it sink in yet because I either, don't believe your words," Donatello exclaimed towards our guests who understood where my brother was coming from. 

"How do we do that?" I finally spoke, making everyone look at me, all while forcing a blush on my face. Dammit. 

"You can set it up, right Donnie?" Leo asks, staring at him from across the room. 

"Yeah, I'll need some fresh samples of your blood," he answers. 

"How much exactly?" Raph butts in, sounding sick himself.

"For DNA, it'll probably take three vials if not four. So, it'd be good if each of us takes it easy afterward. Especially since some of you are extremely hungover from last night," Donnie explains, making me nervous. 

I didn't like the sound of needles. And I didn't like the idea of having to check our DNA to see if we are actually related or not. I wish I could forget today or even last night. 

"How soon can we do it?" 

Donnie slowly stands and shrugs at Leo, "Whenever you're ready- though I don't like this," 

"I don't think any of us do, Donnie," Leo agrees. 

After an hour of work. I was the last one to have my blood drawn. It only brought back memories of Japan, or even when we were put in cages. I didn't like this. It made me feel sicker, and it was the type of sick that had nothing to do with me drinking a shit ton.

The Ancient One stuck around while the time was counting down. Donatello had everything set up in a private room of the penthouse nobody used. I guess you could consider it his new lab. He let nobody in while he was analyzing the blood but after an even longer hour or two, he finally came out, holding a piece of paper in his hand. 

I was nearly asleep until Raph popped me on the leg to make me pay attention. After I was sat upright, I gave him a glare I hope he could never forget for the rest of the damn day. 

"Well, um," Donnie began, "The results are in," 

"Have you looked?" Leo asked standing up again and going for the paper in our brother's hand, but he refrained and didn't let him have it just yet. 

"No. I actually wanted Mikey to look," Donnie admitted walking towards me. 

"What?" I almost laughed, "You want me to be the first to see the results?"

"Why does he get to see first? Mikey doesn't even know what all this means!" Raph shouted trying to grab the paper from Donnie but I snatched it and shot him another glare. 

"Don't be an asshole!" I spat up at him, not being in a funny business type of mood. 

"Just open the damn thing!" he growled. 

I rolled my eyes and slowly unfolded the paper and scanning the page for any useful information I could understand. I saw some numbers. And all the numbers were labeled with our names. I slowly looked up towards my family then back at the paper, "What does it mean when two numbers are the same?" 

Donnie stared at me, clearly surprised, "It means positive," 

I slowly swallowed the lump growing in my throat, and I even felt a sudden need to cry. 

"Donatello, um," I tried, "Yours and Leo's are the same," 

A huge smile grew on his face as he looked at our leader while gripping his hand, obviously forgetting about being mad with him. My eyes flashed towards Raph, who was waiting impatiently for me to continue. But I didn't think I could.

"What about Yours and Raphs?" Donatello questions, squeezing Leo's hand. 

I shook my head uncomfortably, "We aren't a match. We aren't a match for either of you. Which means we aren't related- or even to each other," I drawled, staring towards Raph, who's face looked almost defeated. 

"Oh," was all Donnie could say after seconds of silence. 

"Why aren't we brothers?" I continued, almost feeling angry. 

"I-I don't know, Mikey" Donnie answered, looking devasted as Leo including Raph stayed quiet. 

Minutes passed and Jameson appeared from the hallway- bouncing little Codey in his arms. I almost forgot what was going on just looking at him. But then I remembered that whenever Donatello gives birth, I won't only be an uncle or brother. I'll be a dad. 

"I'm sorry to interrupt. But I think this little monster misses his true family" Jameson says with a smile, handing Codey over to Leo who happily took him. 

Once the baby was in the room, Raph went for the door. 

"Hey- where do you think you're going?" Leo whispers to him just before grabbing him by the arm to stop him. 

"I'm leavin' Leo!" he snaps back but jerking his arm away lightly. 

He immediately turned and left the room to only slam the front door seconds later. 

I felt a stab in my heart without his presence. Everything had just changed. How did it happen so quickly and so unexpectedly? My life was nothing without these four, and now, Codey. 

I was regretting going to that stupid party as the rest of us probably did. But no, now I truly wished I could do it all over again and stop myself from even leaving here. 

My life truly was crumbling- and now, my mate wasn't here to guide me. 

I wanted to die. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	8. ᴾʰᵃⁿᵗᵒᵐ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ⱽᴵᴵ

ᴾʰᵃⁿᵗᵒᵐ

[ Raphael ]

I wasn't in control of my mind anymore. I just thought that whatever happened, had to happen and whatever consequences came afterward, I would just have to handle them the right- or wrong way if it had to come down to that. 

I couldn't think for myself after I heard what they said. I felt completely disconnected from the situation and even my entire life at this point. I kept thinkin' about if they too, were thinking about the same crap. 

I didn't wanna be weak. I wanted to be strong- but I felt as if everything I put into loving each and every one of them had gone to waste in a single fuckin' blow.

I eventually stopped running when I found myself in an un-local area of the city border. 

The day was only wasting away with me standin' around like an idiot. I couldn't even remember the last time I was able to check the time. But it had been hours since I left that fuckin' place. I needed distance, or maybe some time of my own to think or to even process the simple fact that neither I or Mikey was related to the people we've known our whole fuckin' lives. 

I couldn't understand why we were never told about it. And I couldn't grasp the reason why it was only Leo and Donnie who were blood brothers. I suddenly was feelin' like a piece of shit for leavin' Mikey in the middle of that mess. But I couldn't just drag his ass around the whole city with me while I'm clearly angry at the whole fuckin' world. I didn't wanna risk snappin' at him. 

He's been through enough shit. 

I needed to find a distraction that was worth the time I was makin' out here. The clouds in the sky were darkening and I could tell that maybe we were going to get a storm soon. I didn't carry my phone with me, considering everything I had in my pockets was in my room back home just before I even took a shower. 

I felt like they were maybe trying to get ahold of me but if Donatello really wanted to, he could easily track me down. Though I wouldn't want him to, or even risk his own safety including the others, in this neighborhood. It was one of its worst. 

A light sprinkle of rain began pouring down over my head, and for once, it actually felt pretty nice. It put out what little fire was still burning in my gut from hours ago. 

In the distance from on top of a run-down apartment building- I could see lit neon signs that were barely working and blinking from the remaining juice left in the power in this pathetic excuse for a town. 

I couldn't really understand how I got this far without noticing but I didn't mind. A different place and somewhere I wasn't really familiar with could probably do me some good right now. 

But I could smell something in the air that didn't sit right with me. I couldn't figure it out. Maybe, copper? Blood? It wouldn't surprise me. But it was too quiet. Far too quiet. 

I checked my surroundings before hopping to another building all while sticking to the darkest places so whatever commotion going on down below wouldn't be disturbed by me. I didn't need a riot on my ass. Especially at this time of night. But- come to think of it. I was feeling particularly devious tonight. 

I figured that I could scare a couple of kids, or maybe a dozen. 

Leo wouldn't like the idea of that if he was here with me. Mikey maybe, but he's too shy around humans, and Donnie, well, he's fun, but not that fun. 

Dammit. 

I grabbed my head leaning over the edge of the building I was standing on and huffed loudly in frustration. I couldn't get em' out of my mind. The look on their faces, the pain they must have felt. I could tell that all of this completely destroyed them. At that point, I wanted to kill The Ancient One and his little sidekick right there on the spot. But spilling blood wouldn't make my brothers-- 

My eyes widened at the sudden realization and with a stab in my heart, I growled so loud that it echoed for miles and miles in this shit for nothing town. Things quieted down after a few seconds, but inside of my head, it would never. 

"Sounds like you're havin' some trouble," 

I quickly spun around when I heard the sound of someone's voice. It was pitch black out here and the sun had set hours ago. I remember Donatello always being the big expert in night vision all because of those stupid goggles he wore every single day. 

I readied myself, only to realize again, that I didn't bring anything with me when I ran off, including my weapons. If this dude was any kind of mutant or somethin' I was totally screwed. 

"The only trouble I'm gonna be havin' is puttin' you in a body bag pal!" I spat, putting all my defenses in my fists, preparing for anything funny from this wacko. 

But then again, maybe I was the wacko. 

"Cute," he responded, clearly proud of his comeback, "Very cute for someone as interesting as you," 

I felt the breath in the back of my throat hitch. I couldn't see this guy- or even spell him at this point. But the way he spoke. He spoke as if he was from another time, or maybe somewhere religious. I wasn't so sure if that made any sense. But I could hear it. And I could tell that he too wasn't human. 

I didn't reply to him, but I kept myself ready for anything that came at me. It wasn't long and seconds passed by without another word. I took a few careful steps back, making sure I knew exactly where I was going until I ran out of legroom. I was near the back end of the building now, and the only thing getting me off of it was for me to either make a run for it or jump. 

I wanted fun, but not this kind of fun. Especially if it involved me fighting someone like myself. 

I checked to my right, and nothing was there but darkness. I then switched to my left and saw nothing but a blur running towards me. A gust of wind knocked into me so hard I flew back, and nothing but the air could carry me. My head felt blank and I only could see the flashing images in my mind from that 'thing' I just encountered. 

If it even was a thing--

I eventually smacked into the concrete parking lot in the back of the building and rolled onto my stomach with a slight groan. If it wasn't for my shell, I probably could have broken something or fell even harder than your average turtle who weighed approximately three or even four hundred pounds in muscle mass and bone. 

Jeez, I was soundin' like Don now. 

Focus fuckwit, somethin' just hit ya and you wanna think about your weight?

I shook the stress from my head and slowly stood up to my feet, feeling a little wobbly for some reason. In fact, my entire body did. The hell? I had only been standing up for three seconds when the same impact that knocked me from atop the building in front of me, hit me again and I fell forward with another crash, and this time, it actually hurt. Which made things only stranger. 

It wasn't my head this time or my legs. Somethin' was burning- or stingin' like a needle, only times a thousand of those things. I hissed at the rage-inducing pain shooting up into my arms and for what strength I had left in my legs, I flipped over onto my back again and got a quick glance or two down towards where the pain was coming from. 

The rain was becoming heavier, and I could see the city from here. The big city with all of its flashing lights and skyscrapers. It was, for once. Beautiful. 

On my right wrist, and in the palm of my left hand, there were bite marks leading from a full mouth of teeth. A white substance was oozing from the marks and the pain was only getting worse. I couldn't help but make real noises from the feeling in my body now. 

"The fuck did you do to me!" I roared throwing my head back, feeling the need to cut my own arm off. I started screaming- and loudly. 

Things were getting blurry again. So blurry that I completely lost my field of vision and only now, was the time I wish I brought my phone with me. Only now, was a time I needed my brothers the most. 

Especially if I was going to die right here. Right now. I needed them. 

Even if they weren't actually my brothers. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> I'm finally caught up in chapters with Archive, and I can officially talk about things that are actually within the present time. But anyway- the first thing I wanna say is I'm sorry for the lack of updates, and on top of that- I'm sorry that this chapter was so damn short. It racks a good 1,500 characters and that's super short for somebody like me. 
> 
> I love writing really long chapters, but this one has a reason. There's a huge reason behind this chapter, and maybe some people will be into it, maybe some won't. But I'm bringing my OC into my novel, and he's gonna be kind of like a replacement of that prick, Casey Jones. 
> 
> Can you believe what he did to April and Codey? 
> 
> Also, if anyone has watched the 2003 TMNT show, then you probably know who Codey Jones is. Except in the show, his name is spelled Cody instead of Codey. But I thought I'd switch it up for my own fun reasons. 
> 
> What was your favorite season of the 2003 Series? Mine was definitely season's 4-7. 
> 
> Anyway- I'm definitely off track here. I'm gonna try to get back into the groove and continue posting this story because we are FAR from finished, so what're we gonna do about that? We're gonna destroy this, together. 
> 
> Feel free to leave suggestions, opinions or even ask me questions (if you choose) in the comments below. I adore feedback the most, it always puts a smile on my face. 
> 
> Thank you guys for 800 views on Wattpad, and Thank you for over 400 on here for "What Is Your Poison" 
> 
> If you haven't read the first book, then what ta hell are ya doin' here? 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	9. ᴱⁿᵈˡᵉˢˢ ᴾᵒˢˢⁱᵇⁱˡⁱᵗⁱᵉˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> Here we are, fresh new content. I'm finally caught up and you guys can finally see some brand new chapters that I am finishing in real-time. 
> 
> From now on, every single time I finish a chapter on Wattpad, I will be immediately posting it here. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this one, it was fun to write, and kind of sad because I feel for Mikey hard in these scenes. He's such a baby for Raph, but what he doesn't know, won't hurt him. 
> 
> Thank you guys again, and hey!
> 
> Cowabunga. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ⱽᴵᴵᴵ

ᴱⁿᵈˡᵉˢˢ ᴾᵒˢˢⁱᵇⁱˡⁱᵗⁱᵉˢ

[ Donatello ]

The faint voices from the television were disappearing into the back of my mind as I stood in front of the high ceilinged windows that captured the entire living room with barely enough light to brighten the mood. 

It was still raining and for once, I actually believed what the people on the news say about the weather. I didn't really feel like keeping up with my own researches here of late. 

It had been an entire week since we saw Raph. He left his phone and didn't take any clothes with him. Not even food. He just ran out that day and stayed gone. 

We figured it was just one of his spells again. He always ran away when things got too tough for him to handle. He wasn't too big on emotional status, but dealing with it alone seemed to be his favorite. But this was a spell that was lasting more than a day. 

It was a spell that was beginning to scare the rest of us, including Angel. Who had returned two days after Raph's disappearance. She at first wasn't really talkative. But she mentioned that her father grounded her for the rest of the month for going out to that nightclub again. 

When she said again it repeated in my head for a while and I guessed that we weren't the first people to get trashed with her. It would never happen again, that's for sure. 

Mikey, on the other hand, went mute. 

When he realized that Raph probably wasn't coming back, he changed entirely. I think we all did that day and to be honest, I couldn't blame him. 

Mikey tried distracting himself with Codey the majority of the time. I guessed he wanted to be around someone he didn't need to talk to. I knew who he wanted, and I knew why he was like this. There were many reasons actually- and I couldn't do anything to fix them. 

I felt like a bad brother, though, we weren't even blood-related, I still considered him and Raphael my brothers until the end. 

Leo didn't seem to be fazed, and I just assumed that it was his ego again. He always let it get in the way of everything and it bugged the hell out of me. But I didn't feel like starting a fight either, so, I left him alone unless he came to me. 

The thunder outside was lightning up, and the only thing I could hear was the droplets of rain, including the voices from the TV. Everything else didn't seem to have a sound. 

I finally peered down towards my abdomen, almost cracking a smile at the barely visible bump forming in my plastron. It was the only thing that could make me feel secure right now. 

I placed my hands over my stomach and gave it small rubs here and there, "Maybe you'll be the glue that brings this family back together," I whispered ever so slightly. 

A door then slammed, alerting me almost immediately and I quickly adjusted my glasses and turned away from the window, in hope that whoever came through the front door, was someone we really needed right now. 

"Hey," Leo greeted dryly when he entered the room, clearly drenched from the rain, but he didn't seem to mind.

I let out a breath of air, nearly disappointed, but relieved that at least one of us came back. 

"Find anything?"

Leo planted himself on the sofa, where our cat Klunk was sleeping and shook his head, "I picked up his scent somewhere near the southside, but I came up with nothing. I have no clue where that idiot would have gone. I don't even understand why he chose to leave right now,"

I slowly moved towards the opposite side of the couch and gave Klunk a few pats, "I could probably guess why- but Raph has always been so full of surprises,"

Leo didn't answer for a second, and from the corner of my eye, he seemed to be pondering with something in that head of his. He looked kind of cute when he was wet from the rain. 

"The scent I picked up, it was his. But it wasn't his muskily stench-"

"Then what was it?" I asked looking directly at him now. 

Leo bit his lip, and shook his head, "No, it can't be. Never mind," he answered waving his hand at me. 

"Tell me," I quietly begged, taking a minute to realize. But I waited. 

"I don't want you to worry and I definitely don't need Mikey worrying any more than he was," 

"Leonardo," I argued, knitting my brows together in a sudden burst of frustration, "Tell me!" 

Leo sighed and ran a hand over his face, "It was his blood, alright?"

I relaxed a bit, "That doesn't always mean anything bad," 

"But it's bad enough, Donnie," he replied standing up from the sofa, "We'll discuss more details later. I need a nap, or better yet, a bath or something" 

"Alright," I gave up, watching my leader leave the room. 

He was under more stress than before. Though, what was I even saying? The whole house was. I couldn't get things straight from here, but I couldn't worry too much. And if Raph got hurt while he was out there, maybe it was for a good reason. Maybe he was fighting someone who was trying to hurt someone else. Raph was by far the biggest out of the four, and I couldn't even begin to imagine someone hurting him. 

With our mutated blood, we healed faster than any creature, animal or human on the planet. A broken bone would take months to relocate itself in the tissues, but we would only need at least two weeks. Cuts and bruises wouldn't last long either, and eventually just like everything else, would turn into scars. We had physical proof of this fact. 

I slowly stood and debated whether I should let Mikey in on the news, but he'd instantly go into the conclusion of our brother being dead or something completely crazy.

I then figured I should check in on him. I haven't seen him the entire day and it was only noon. I knew he couldn't have been asleep, and Codey was napping in his crib, so both were fine. 

I took slow steps towards Mikey's bedroom. On his door, he had already hung up countless amounts of game or music posters to match his personality and for a second, I was happy he hasn't changed in that aspect. 

Or at least not yet anyway. 

At first, I wanted to knock, but if I did, I knew he'd probably just tell me to go away- so, I gripped the doorknob and walked on in. As soon as I entered, I was immediately greeted by the mess of clothes, knickknacks, and possibly some old toys. 

Gosh, Mikey was almost twenty and he still doesn't clean his bedroom. It made me cringe in ways I couldn't explain, especially with the smell alone. 

Mikey was spread out across his bed with a comic in his hand, and when he saw me, he lowered his head back towards the page and let out a sigh, "Get out, D," 

"Jeez, don't I get a hi, or something?"

"No," he grumbled, gripping the edges of his comic book. 

"Ah, I see," I went on, "I guess the grouchy Michelangelo doesn't want pizza for dinner tonight," 

I noticed the change in Mikey's eyes the second I mentioned his favorite food, but I could also tell that he was fighting the urge. 

I came a little closer, moving the crap on the floor out of the way with my foot, "I mean, if you don't want it, I can tell the guy never mind," 

"No!" he shrieked, almost throwing his comic book on the floor, "Don't you dare!" 

"Then stop being so grumpy and actually talk to me," I glared, suddenly becoming serious. 

He huffs, finally making eye contact with me, "Talk about what?" 

"I dunno," I shrugged, "Maybe, why you're so quiet here lately?"

Mikey cuts his eyes at me, "You know why, dude,"

"Raph is gonna come back, when will you learn that?" I questioned bitterly while crossing my arms.

"Easy for you to say!" he almost shouted standing up on his knees to get up off his bed, "You have Leo all to yourself! You don't even touch me anymore! Raph was all I had, bro, and on top of that, we aren't even related! You act like it's so easy! Like everything will be just fin--" 

I quickly leaned down, caressing the back of Michelangelo's head and pulled him in for a tight kiss, in hope that he shuts up for now and realizes that I too understand what he's going through. I'm just trying to be positive about it. 

I released Mikey from my grip, and he stares up at me only inches away as if he's surprised or something- "What was that for?" he questions, with big blue eyes shining up at me. 

"I figured it'd shut you up," I smiled, "I want you to stop worrying so much. Raph is fine, and yeah, he's a bit of an ass for running off like that- during that moment especially- but, he'll be back, this isn't the first time he's done this. It just wasn't this long" 

Mikey bit at the bottom of his lip, while looking off somewhere else, "I know it really isn't a good time. But, could you do that again?" 

I stared down at him almost laughing- "Do what Mikey?" I poked him, and he giggled. 

"Come on, dude, don't make me say it!" 

"Say it or else you won't get it," I remarked with a grin on my face. 

"When did you become so demanding?" he teased, biting his lip again which nearly makes me flush every time he does it. I only wondered briefly where this was going- and I needed to choose wisely. 

"Say it," was all I replied with and his cute face got as red as mine probably was.

"Kiss me," he said quietly while still looking up at me. 

I caressed Mikey's cheek with my thumb and slowly moved into his lips again, almost teasing him a little bit to make a smile reappear on my face. I placed my mouth over his and let the kiss start out slow, making sure that Mikey kept his underwear on and didn't go too fast. 

He didn't really understand this side of love, and today I wanted him to learn. 

He was already getting greedy which was something I was used to, but the moment Mikey tried to touch me, I grabbed his hands, letting a grin remain on my face as I kept them down by his sides and continued to kiss him lightly and passionately wanting to make it last. 

"D," Mikey breathed, trying to grab at my shirt, which was only a hoodie at this point, "Let me,"

"Don't want to move too fast, Michelangelo," I stopped, pecking his lips once. 

"I like fast," he nodded, leaning up to kiss me again but this time, he finally gets a grab at my hoodie, forcing his hands up the front, almost touching my stomach and rubbing the tips of his fingers against my chest. 

I felt myself getting heated almost immediately- but I didn't feel like it was the right time to be doing this. Mikey wasn't going to let it go though and that would be my problem. 

My older brother was missing and this wasn't exactly planned. In fact, it wasn't even my objective. I just wanted to check in on Mikey- not fool around. 

But kissing him always felt right, and fooling around with either of my siblings always felt right, and the secrets we kept from Angel or even Jameson was still hidden in this house, and sometimes I thrived on the thrill of being caught or something- it was so unprofessionally stupid. 

Screw it. A little won't hurt. Right?

Mikey reached into the front of my sweats and grasped my member tight enough to force a moan straight from my throat which seemed to be his goal. 

"You sound so cute when you do that, D," Mikey gushes, already pumping his hand around my growing erection. 

Dammit, my brothers always did this to me. It was so unfair. They made me feel so weak but in so many ways possible. I couldn't even begin to figure out how, or why this happens. I didn't need much, but just a little and I was ready to go every single time. 

My lips parted and were already getting dry from the current situation. I couldn't help but enjoy the power they always had over me. It was chilling- and completely unreal. 

"D-Don't," I managed, feeling Mikey's fingers curl around my shaft. 

"Don't what, D?" he giggles, "Looks like I've got you by the balls now, bro,"

"Jesus, Mikey-" I bit back, almost feeling lightheaded, "I w-want you to top me," 

Mikey's eyes widened at my sudden approach, "Really?" 

I quickly pulled from my brother and kicked whatever was in my way and crawled over Mikey's bed and positioned myself in the way I knew I needed to and bent over to the point where only my forehead was resting in the comfort of my little brother's blankets. 

I got my pants down, only to realize how fast my heart was beating and how hard I was breathing-- crap, what's coming over me? Was it the egg or something? 

I made a noted-reminder in the back of my head to run some tests after this. I felt like it was too early in the process to be having such strong hormones. A mating cycle wasn't even in cue for me. Or maybe, it wasn't anything at all. It was just something I simply was forced to need in the heat of the moment. 

"Damn, Donnie, are you serious about this? I'm not really uh--" 

"Just do it-- it's not hard, Michelangelo!" I said, speaking fast as if I was in a hurry or something. 

Chill out, Donatello. Mikey has never done this. 

I wanted to agree with my thoughts or even my worries. But I could care less. 

For once I was officially careless. I blamed my freaking brother, but it was mostly me. 

I think. 

I turned my head to the side just before making sure my glasses were removed and put somewhere safe in this cluster-fuck of a bedroom. Mikey seriously needed to learn to clean. 

I'd have to make sure to remind him after we were-- er, done. 

"I'd never thought anyone could look so hot like that," Mikey dragged, crawling up behind me, finally making his move which forced a sigh of relief out of me. 

I felt his hands again, and this time, he was actually going slow. Being gentle even. It felt good. But it wasn't enough, "Even if you don't know how- I just want you to do it," I reassure, reaching for my member, giving it a few tugs.

"Your wish is my command, D," Mikey grins, even though I could tell how nervous he was. 

I didn't want this to drag on for too long because the slow stuff was already out the window. That and I didn't wanna risk anyone catching us, even though, I don't think anyone would come in without knocking unless it's Leo. Plus, I did order food, but with that being said, I keep forgetting about Jameson taking care of things like that. 

Stop worrying so much. 

Mikey started rubbing his fingers over the surface of my shell, and I started groaning again when I felt him press into me. He at least knew how to do that part. A sharp hiss came from behind me, but it was a noise that only made me want this even more. 

"T-That's it, Mikey," I praised, being slow at pleasuring myself, "You g-got it," 

"S-Shit, D, is it meant t-to feel this good?" Mikey asked on a harsh breath. I felt his hands at my hips now and the tips of his fingers greeted my body with tightness, along with his own cock piercing the spot I needed it most. 

I started to move my hand faster, "Yes! Now, move. Fuck, you gotta move, Mikey!" I told him, almost rutting myself against my brother, needing the pressure. 

As soon as I said it, Mikey was starting out with simple, inexperienced thrusts, and it was enough, but only for a few seconds. I needed more. I gripped my cock tightly and moved my head again so I could see directly between my own legs. 

"D-Donnie," my little brother moaned, sounding so helpless yet so sexy at the same time. 

"Faster, Mikey!" I demanded, almost gritting my teeth. 

"T-Tired of you ordering me around!" Mikey responded with a sharp thrust of his hips that caused me to almost fall forward, "So annoying!" 

Mikey almost sounded angry- but maybe this is what I wanted from him. I've never really seen him get completely out of hand except for when he killed Toshiro. He did the world a favor that day. 

"T-Then stop bein' a little p-pussy and fuck me!" I growled, almost gritting my teeth again. 

Mikey instantly began to speed up, letting the sounds of skin against skin fill my ears. Shit, I needed more. It was good, the burn was really good, but it wasn't just enough. 

"Guess I'm not the only bitch in the family!" Mikey purred from behind me, landing a harsh smack on my behind, making me churr. 

"Again, faster, mm, so close!" I gasped biting hard on my lips, as Mikey fills me with the pounding of his own hips. 

"I wanna finish inside of you, dude, and you're not gonna stop me!" he pants, obviously admiring the control he has, "That what you want?" 

I let my mouth fall open and I nodded quickly and desperately- practically begging for my own release. I needed a final push, maybe if he just hit-- there. 

"Ah, there! Mikey- fuck," I writhed, sounding breathless as my free hand gripped the sheets. I gazed off between my legs with lidded eyes, noticing the cum dripping from my cock, and with one final, or even many pounding thrusts later, the tip of my erection spurted with cum, coating my little brother's bed covers. 

"Yeah," Mikey moaned, leaning over my shell, "Hah, fuck, Donnie, you feel too good! I'm gonna, finish--" he grunts, digging his fingers into my sides. 

I was still stroking my hand over my shaft when Mikey came inside of me just as his bedroom door opens like I felt it probably would have, and Leo peered at the both of us like he saw a ghost. 

At this point, I didn't think I cared. Especially if it was Leo. In fact, I was happy it was him and nobody else. 

"Dude, come on," Mikey pants, "Knock," 

I looked over, seeing the flushed look on Leo's face but he shakes his head, "When you're decent, I want you guys to come into the living room. I may or may not have a lead on Raph," he says, turning from us and leaving. 

I slowly sat up, letting my shell rest against Mikey who was just as puzzled as me, "Well, that went well," 

"More like a buzzkill, bro," Mikey commented just before kissing the back of my head and crawling off of his bed. I smiled to myself and was happy that Leo didn't yell at either of us or got mad, "Did I do good?"

I glanced at Mikey once I got my pants back up, "Of course you did, c' mere," I motioned, bringing him in for a final kiss, "I needed that, really bad," 

We shared our kiss for a few more seconds, and Mikey giggled out of nowhere, "Can't wait to tell Raph about topping you," 

"Oh yeah? You gonna kiss and tell already?" I laughed with him and pecked him again on the lips before we left his room. 

Once we got to the lounge, we were greeted by a new guest. Which was something I wasn't expecting to be honest. 

"John?" I said, as he quickly stood and gave both me and Mikey a firm handshake, "What're you doing here?"

"He's here about the lead," Leo answered for me and I stared at him already concerned. 

"Leo here told me about Raphael's disappearances a few days ago, and when he informed me, I sent some of my men into the city to look for him, between the north, and southside. And the only traces we've come up with would be in southside, New York," John explains, looking at each of us, trying to make the understatement he was hoping for. 

"Have you found anything important?" I questioned, which made the look on the man's face twist. 

"Lemme ask ya somethin' kid," John sighs, rubbing his temple, "Would your brotha ever hurt someone?"

"Absolutely not," Mikey quickly defends, "He doesn't hurt anyone unless they deserve it!"

"Well," John clears his throat, sounding nervous, "Last night around three o'clock, my men were reported dead down by the docks in southside. It was pretty gruesome," 

My stomach turned at the sound of John's words. He wouldn't. Would he?

"Raph couldn't have done that," Mikey exclaimed. 

"Mikey-" Leo interrupts, "His scent was found at the scene," 

"His blood," I agreed, reminding myself of Leo's earlier words. 

"Someone else was there too. Someone we don't know," Leo continues. 

"A stranger. But if they are with Raph, then, they have to know at least something?" I said, sitting down, needing a minute to put together some thoughts.

"Dude, Raph didn't kill those men!" Mikey says towards Leo, then back at John, "He wouldn't!" 

"Can you get me a blood sample?" I blurted out quietly while catching my brother's attention. Leo peered at me questioningly but agreed. 

"A blood sample from what, Donnie?"

"Raph's. I have a theory-- or something. But I need his blood from the scene. Or from wherever you found it. I need to analyze it immediately," 

"God, you guys are making him sound like he actually murdered those guys! He didn't kill them!" Mikey fussed, and Leo came in between us and shouted back at him. 

"Enough!" Leo warned, "We will find out. For now, John. Would you please continue to keep a lookout? But tell your men to keep their distance. At least from southside anyway"

John nodded and gave Leo his word before making his leave. Leo left soon after. Which kept me and Mikey in a state of mind where we didn't know where to turn. I was beyond concerned and worried. Mikey was going crazy and was in disbelief. Plus, on top of that, he was in complete denial that our oldest brother could have gone psycho and killed four men. 

I had hope in the back of my mind that everything would finally settle down. But no, it was one thing after the other and that was one reason to have sex more often. It was the only time that each of us got peace of serenity. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	10. ᴬ ᴶᵒʸᶠᵘˡ Cᵒⁿˢᵗʳᵘᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ"   
> ᴵˢ ᵇᵃˢᵉᵈ ᵘᵖᵒⁿ ᶜᵒᵐᵖˡᵉᵗᵉ ᶠⁱᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ⁱᵈᵉᵃ'ˢ ᴴʸᵈʳᵃᵏⁱⁿᶻ ʰᵃˢ ᶜᵒˡˡᵉᶜᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖˡᵒᵗ ᵒᶠ ʰᵉʳ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳⁱᵗᵉ ᶠᵃⁿᵈᵒᵐ ᵒᶠ ᵃˡˡ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ, ᵀᴹᴺᵀ
> 
> Read Book One Now!
> 
> This Story Contains #Turtlecest. 
> 
> ໓໐ຖ't likē, ໓໐ຖ't rēค໓.
> 
> In the second installment of The Poison Trilogy, the story continues but is a thousand times different than the last. The turtles continue to face treachery between the four. The boundaries they argue with daily and even the new arrival in the family. The plot thickens even as the seconds pass by and from here, they have decisions to make and possibilities to fight against. Donnie reveals a secret that shakes Leo to his core, and Mikey learns some new moves that surprise everyone. What else is there to happen? You wanna know? Then join me on this second journey and end it for real this time! Or maybe, maybe it'll never end.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ᴵˣ

ᴬ ᴶᵒʸᶠᵘˡ Cᵒⁿˢᵗʳᵘᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ

[ Raphael ]

"I curse my stars in bitter grief and woe, that made my love so high and me so low"

"I wish you'd shut up with your poetry garbage," I hissed, holding my head. 

"You may not like it, Raphael, but I think it's somethin' you need," Cade replied, signaling a single jab towards my attitude. 

My head wasn't straight since he came into my life. It had been a month already- and neither I or my brothers have seen each other. My new buddy mentioned that it was too dangerous. Even though, I tried explaining to him that I wouldn't hurt them. 

I could leave anytime I wanted to. I could go back, forget everything that has happened. But I simply couldn't. At least not for a while. But to my brothers, a month is longer than a while. 

Images of decrepit memories kept flashing behind my eyes. I felt my veins sting with the familiar reminder of the night my life got even worse than it already was. I felt different, both good and bad. I didn't seem to look any different, but something about my eyes was no longer known to me. I spoke as if, I too was from a different point in time. But I was still me overall. 

I had asked a thousand times or more, why Cade chose me. 

He simply answered honestly- the prick. Said that he thought this would be fun. He thought I, would be fun. And on top of that, he thought I was by far the most fascinatin' creature he's ever laid his eyes upon. The fucker was way too soft with his words. He kind of reminded me of Leo in a way. Leo always loved his books, his poetry too. Even though nobody knew it. But I did. I've seen em' and to be honest, they weren't that bad for a guy who acts like he has a stick up his ass twenty-four seven. 

"You're thinkin' about things again,"

I rose my head, making eye contact with my new friend who I still barely knew shit about, "I told ya to stay outta my head,"

"It's something I can't just shut off, Raphael. People's thoughts just waver me like a novel. You know? Sometimes I wish I couldn't hear people's thoughts, because as everyone knows, sometimes the truth is better left unsaid," he responds, being overly gentle with his words again.

"Yeah, well. Sometimes I wish I couldn't see the future either, but what is done, is done," 

I slowly sat back, letting my shell rest against the back of the couch. My mind was fuckin' with me. I felt guilty- disgusting even. But only if they knew. I wish I could tell them. I wish I could fuckin' show them what a monstrous mutant I've actually become. 

It was a couple of days after the incident. I was barely even going- but it was good enough for me. I couldn't then, and still don't understand what I am, or what I'm capable of. But the smell of someone else's blood, even if it's still inside their body- was purely intoxicating. 

. . . Two Weeks Earlier. . . 

I felt it. 

It was still burning- I needed something- anything fuck. I just needed something!

I pounded my fist into the ground, not realizing that I received no pain from it. My knuckles were battered until the flesh beneath my skin was showing. My entire body was vibrating and it felt like someone shoved a hot iron down my throat. 

"The fuck did you do to me!" I scream, letting my voice echo over the entire block. 

I was alone. I was literally talkin' to my fuckin' self. 

I inhaled the deepest breath I could possible and slowly stood up, almost stumbling over my own feet. I could smell things I thought didn't exist, and hearing- I didn't even know where to begin. 

"Is that him?" 

Was I actually hearin' shit now? 

I looked around, realizing how blurry my vision actually was. I walked forward, almost falling again. My throat was tightening like I was being choked. 

"Yo, man, you okay? John sent us," someone said, making my ears ring. 

But then something clicked. Something in the back of my head snapped and my vision became clear again. I peered around myself and saw more than three men coming towards me. They mentioned John. I wanted to ask how my brothers were. I wanted to return back to them. And most of all, I wanted to see Mikey's smilin' face again. 

These guys, as usual, John's men were always dressed to impress. 

I inhaled through my nose again, and the wind came over me, showing me exactly what I was craving at this very moment. I could see their lips moving and I knew that they were saying things to me. But I didn't care. I wanted this burning feeling to disappear. Even my thoughts were telling me to do unbelievable things. 

Just do it. Take a chance for yourself. Kill them, and then, you know what to do. 

Fuck, why?

The look in their eyes was suspicious, skeptical and definitely alarmed at this point. I knew they had guns on them. I could smell the copper. 

I bit my lip, and let the present time take me with it even if it was the most dangerous thing I could have ever agreed to do. 

I launched myself into the air, landing on the middle man and knocking the last two on their asses with my arms. I could hear the groans and moans from the pain I was causing them, but it was more like music to my ears and heaven to see blood spill all over my hands. 

The taste was more than satisfying- the bitter, metal, but sweet drink slipping past my lips almost brought me to my knees. It fueled the burn in my throat and it fixed everything. 

I was brought back to reality when my teeth were stitched into one of these dudes' throat. It was messy and nasty but so damn good and by far the best thing I ever put in my mouth. 

Mikey's face flashed in my mind and I released the corpse in between my fingers. 

What're you doing Raphie? 

Breaking rules, that's what he's doing Michelangelo. 

Leo came next. His face and his demanding stare and fucked up lecture that made me wanna rip his head off. He was always so smug- so fuckin' annoying! Always tellin' me what to do just like that bitch ass rat we called a father--

"Stop!" I shouted, hitting myself over the head wanting the voices to go away. 

The bodies in front of me only made it worse. The memory of that little boy who was murdered right in front of me came back again. The look on his face, the back roll of his eye sockets as his head was cut off. 

I mangled them. I made myself a mess. A mess I'd have to clean up. 

But now. I had only but one thing to figure out. My passion, desire, and obsession with another person's blood frightened me, and all at the same time excited me. 

. . .Present Day. . . 

"I need to get back,"

"I can't let you risk hurting anyone else, Raphael. You weren't even meant to hurt those people you already killed," Cade sighs but speaking calmly. 

"I already told ya, I won't hurt my brothers. I'm doin' good. Better actually-- especially since I finally have some sort of vision of what I'm meant to do to restrain myself. I don't even know if my brothers' blood will be something I'll want," I went on, wanting to argue the shit out this subject. But I couldn't bother. This shit was confusin' enough. I still felt like me, but didn't. 

"You'll want any if you can get your hands on it. I wasn't really expecting things to go this far between us. But I feel somethin' special about you. And I know I'm all but a mystery-- and maybe, one of these days I'll tell you my story- but for now, you have to listen to me," 

"You can't keep me from my brothers!" I nearly shouted, feeling myself already getting heated.

"No shouting- I don't like arguing with anyone. Especially if I care about them. It's a past thing" he explains, making me even more irritated. 

"Mikey needs me," I exclaimed, feeling extremely on edge. 

"Your lover?"

I glanced at him, and shrugged, "Yeah, my lover. My mate," 

"You miss him," Cade assumes, which he was right to guess. I missed all of them. I was an idiot to run out on them again. Instead, I got myself mixed up in this shit that's turned my life upside down. 

"You have no idea, alright?"

"I do," he corrects, watching me from the side, "I don't like talking about it. But I do,"

"You don't like talkin' about anything dude, so don't even try to relate to me," I said standing up, "I'm going back to them, and you can't stop me," 

Cade stands up, almost matching my height. He was a tall guy- and covered in ink. His arms told stories I'm sure, and so did the rest of his body. But right now, I couldn't feel the need to care. 

I was tired of sitting around and letting my thoughts consume me. My life was an utter cluster fuck right now, and I chose to leave the only people who could help me. Especially Donnie. Maybe he could do something about this. 

Maybe, he could fix me. 

Yeah. Fix. 

There wasn't a fix for immortality. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> This chapter was pretty short, but during this, I had a bit of writer's block. It definitely wasn't the highlight of Book Two, but I'm gonna try and do better for chapter Ten.
> 
> It is Ten after all. 
> 
> For the next one, I'm hoping I can make it a little less confusing and less all over the place with this part in the story but other than all that mess, I hope you enjoyed regardless. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	11. Sᵘⁿᵇᵘʳˢᵗ Sᵘʳᵖʳⁱˢᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Mikey's birthday and it's official, he's finally twenty years old. But when it's your big special day- there's always that one person you want to spend it with. And without Raph, he's miserable. Don and Leo try to cheer him up, but things always take a turn for the worst.
> 
> Mikey wishes for one thing on this day and after the disappearance of his beloved, the only thing he wants is to have him back, for good.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣ

Sᵘⁿᵇᵘʳˢᵗ Sᵘʳᵖʳⁱˢᵉ

[ Michelangelo ]

. . . June . . .

Man, it was still raining outside. I felt the need to get my board out and take it for a spin. But the weather only made fun times, less fun. 

I missed going outside. I even missed the sewers. And dad. 

"Aren't you going to open it?" Donnie asked with a huge grin on his face, forcing me back into the reality of what the world was celebrating today. 

My birthday-- shit. 

"Sorry, dude, was just thinking again," I apologized, crisscrossing my legs and pulling the wrapped gift closer to me. It was a pretty flat gift, and for once, I wasn't so excited about it. 

"Raph?" Leo asks coming back from the kitchen to toss me a soda. 

My frown faltered at the mention of my mate. It was a whole month since I saw him. I had hoped he was okay- or maybe doing something that didn't involve trouble. 

I missed him more than I could probably explain. I wasn't good with words anyway- so, why even try, Mikey?

I tore at the paper and ignored Leo's concerning question, and underneath all the DC/Marvel wrapping paper, I saw a new comic book. 

For even a second, excitement sparked me and I quickly ripped the rest of the paper off and revealed the newest in its series of the Garfield trilogy. 

It was still in the plastic wrapping and on the front was a limited edition sticker. 

I nearly squeaked with pure joy and hugged the book to my chest, "Can't believe you found it!" I gushed at Donnie who still wore his face splitting grin, while Leo shared the same happiness for me. It was nice to see a smile on everyone's faces for once. 

"I snagged it just before someone else could. But don't ask me how I pulled it off," Donatello wavers, rolling his eyes. 

"I can't believe you're still into those things," Leo comments sipping some tea from his mug.

"That's because you're more into classical books," Donnie teases, still smiling at me, "I'm just glad that you like it. I've wanted to see you laugh for a while," 

I glance down at my lap, where my new gift was resting and I couldn't help but wish Raph was here. If anything for my birthday-- why couldn't he be here? 

"Thanks," I whispered softly earning a small frown from Donnie. 

"I wish he was here too," he mentions honestly and I nod my head, understanding the circumstances. 

"I'm gonna go put this with the others," I say putting on a fake smile while I got up, and silently exited the room. 

I quickly closed my door and teared up. I hugged the comic close to my chest and laid across my bed and began to sob. I couldn't bring myself to be happy today. I couldn't even keep up an act around my own family.

Raph was out there somewhere. He was doing unspeakable things to John's men, and I didn't know whether I should believe it or not. Raph would hurt anyone that tried to hurt him, but doing it on purpose? I couldn't come to see it. 

With his chi, he could rip buildings down. If he was forced to get out of control, then maybe. 

I tried to be quiet, but crying I guess wasn't really meant to be a silent thing you were supposed to do. It kept coming- the tears kept rolling from my eyes no matter how badly I wanted to stop. I needed to remind myself to breathe, but then, I felt weak again. I felt like such a baby for doing this. I never did this. I haven't done this since-- since, well. Dad. 

A knock on my door immediately made me wipe at my face, trying to clean any evidence away along with the huge lump in my throat that wouldn't go away yet. 

"Mikey?" Leo's voice alerted my consciousness. 

"Heh, oh, hey dude!" I greeted, without looking at him, "Sorry this comic is super good!"

"You've always been a bad liar," he replies, making me sigh in defeat. I felt the bed dip next to me and Leo crawled up to my side, planting a hand over my shell, "You wanna talk about it?"

"There's nothing to talk about, Leo," 

"Mmhm, there's another lie," he says smugly before patting my head, "I know when you've been crying and I know when you're hiding something-- so, talk to me,"

"I just miss him," 

"Donatello is still analyzing the blood sample I brought back. He says it's taking longer than usual. He even said that the blood might not even be Raphael's. It's so broken apart," 

I glanced up at Leo, and found him staring right back at me, "What if he never comes back, Leo?"

My brother frowns at me, "Don't think like that. Keep a leveled head, and until he does, we have to keep moving forward. For Codey- and well, for the new baby" 

"Easy for you to say, dude," I mumbled finally sitting up. I leaned forward and quickly tightened my arms around Leo's neck and hugged into him the best I could. 

I guess I surprised him because it took him a second to hug back and when he did it felt even better. His arms were delicate around me, but so soothing and securing-- kind of like Raph's. 

"No more crying- you know I hate to see you cry, I always have, Mikey" he sighs, not letting me go yet. 

I sniffle a little bit and withdraw myself from Leo so I can wipe my nose again and I nod my head at him, "Would it be okay if I go out for a bit?"

"Where are you gonna go?" he asks, capturing my face with his darker blue eyes. 

"I wanna skate on my board. I haven't done it in ages since well, since the sewer," I answered honestly not really wanting to be reminded of my old home. 

"Don't stay gone too long-- and I mean too long as in after midnight. Okay?" 

I roll my eyes and Leo silently scolds me, "Alright, dude, I get it. At least give me some time. I'm not really a kid anymore," 

"You are at heart," he teases, tickling my sides and I immediately began to laugh. 

"No! No tickling! Stop, bro, you know I hate being tickled!" I chortled in response and tried to push his hands away but failed and he continued. 

"No more crying!" he laughs with me, "I mean it,"

"Alright, alright, I get it, dude!" I giggle one last time before Leo plants a soft kiss on my lips, surprising me. Though I instantly return the favor and kiss him back, taking my time with letting it last. 

I wanted to go out, but if Leo, of all people, is showing this must affection, I couldn't possibly leave right now. I loved it when he actually gave in to his needs and acted upon them. He wasn't just as rough as Raph, or dirty as Donnie. He was kind of in between all of those things and a little more. 

Leo was the first to pull away and I quickly caught him one last time and pecked him on the lips, earning a smile from him, "Go have some fun, but you know the rules," he says getting up from my bed and heading for the door. 

"Yes, fearless, your good pal, Mikey knows all about your juicy rules," I mock playfully and he shakes his head, continuing to wear that lingering smile of his. 

Once I'm alone, I finally suit up and go out. I hop on my board and ride along the top of the penthouse and jump to the one over, being cautious about my steps. 

The wind was pretty crisp, and it wasn't too cold, or hot. This was the type of weather you could easily do anything in. I picked a totally perfect time to leave. Though the sun was almost ready to set. I guess the day really went by with my birthday and all, and this was by far my worst one. But I had Donnie, Leo, and Codey. Even Angel stopped by for about an hour to give me my first bottle of tequila. But Leo immediately took it from her and scolded Angel for even thinking that type of gift was a good idea. 

I couldn't really blame him since the party- but it sure was fun. But then again, it sure was bad. I did drugs and drank things I couldn't even pronounce. I was stupid, and not the good kind of stupid. 

I went a bit south and found myself in an abandoned park. It looked completely empty and run down due to the playground being old and rusted. The seats on the swings were hanging off, and some were even missing and the slide just looked dangerous. 

I made sure to look around first before I entered the area, but I saw no one, and it was pretty dark here anyway. After taking a few more cautious steps, I stepped onto the playground, letting my toes sink into the mulch. 

It felt sort of familiar. Although this place looked kind of haunted. I didn't mind it for once. I wasn't scared. What reason did I have to be scared? Especially if some nut job wants to test me. I'd love some action right about now. I haven't used any of my skills in weeks. Or probably months. At least it felt like it. 

The wind began to pick up, and the area smelled like charcoal. Like this place was burned down long ago, plus the people who lived here. I couldn't figure out how I ended up here. I don't even know why I stopped to see the sights because naturally, I would stay away from dark corners like this. 

It was the south side. The worst place in New York City. It was kind of like Arkham, from the Batman comics. It was where people died the most. Where others went insane before they even got sane. It was a bad place. But why the hell did I come here?

In my mind, it was beautiful at first. It was magical from afar. But it tricks you just by its appearance. Something was calling for me. Something unknown. 

The gravel and dirt at my toes were beginning to shiver and shake. It rose a couple of inches from the ground, creating a shield around me. The air felt heavy and suffocating. 

"Mikey," 

I jumped around, landing solidly on my feet, and across the playground, I saw a shadow. Someone with red pupils. They were tall, completely faded. It was too dark. 

It knew my name. 

I didn't think about that just yet. I felt like the atmosphere was swallowing me whole. I needed to bolt for it. Don't look back Mikey-- this person, er, thing! It was about to have a meal. 

Maybe he just wants to talk. 

Not a chance. I could hear that thing breathing from fucking here!

"You stay away from me!" I called out, quickly turning again and running for the closest building to me. I flipped my board up and kicked the rockets into gear which gave me a boost and a perfect head start. 

As soon as I hit the top side of the old building I continued to run. I ran as far as the south side would take me. But the farther I went, the more I began to notice how unrecognizable these places were. 

Did I go the wrong way? 

I stopped to catch my breath and groaned when I realized, yes. Yes, I did go the wrong way. If this was a horror movie, I'd be like that one girl with a huge chest that falls on her face and gets chopped up by the killer. 

I heard a loud thud and knew right then, this thing followed me. But how? I was being so fast! 

I released a sharp breath and turned on my heel to swing at it. I was ready to fight and ready to protect myself. Hell, I just needed to fight in general. 

When I swung my fist, I was caught by surprise. I felt a hand on mine. A familiar hand. I slowly unclasped my fingers and glanced up at the figure in front of me, and sure enough, it was just as familiar as I knew it was. 

"Raph?" 

I couldn't even hear myself speaking. The words tumbled out, and I couldn't believe what I was seeing and I nearly dropped to my knees. The figure stepped forward, letting what was left of the light reveal who and what he was. 

"Your reflexes have gotten better," my brother comments with a single smirk on his face and he releases my fist, preventing me from punching him. 

It was really him. But, something was different. Something was off about him. 

"I thought you were dead," I finally spoke, almost sobbing on the spot as I practically flung myself at him, trying to give him the tightest hug ever. My arms were snaked around his neck, and I couldn't help but inhale his scent. I loved it the most and now, I could finally have it again. 

"Easy, Mikey" he warned, bringing me back down to my own feet. "You're lucky I'm even comin' this close to you, but I couldn't just miss today and disappoint you further than I already have,"

I stared up at him, completely confused, "Where have you been anyway?" 

"Dealin' with some stuff," he answered struggling to look at me. 

"Why couldn't you have let me know, or one of us?" 

Another thud landed nearby, and the only thing I could think about was maybe one of my brothers followed me. But that wasn't the case at all. 

"Because he's been with me," someone said, almost spooking me. 

I grabbed on to Raph's arm and stuck myself closer to him, "The hell are you?" 

"Easy-- didn't I tell you not to follow me?" my brother said, confusing me even more, "I told ya I could do this on my own!" 

"It's a risk, Raphael!" the dude shouted, "He's obviously confused enough, why put this kind of stress on him?" 

"You got no business tellin' me what to do, or say to my own boyfriend!"

"Raph, who the hell is this guy? And what are you talking about, stress, what did you get yourself into now?" I interrupted, pushing a hand to his chest and making him look at me. He quickly turned his head to my attention when I put my hand on him, and for only a second, I saw something different in his eyes. 

Raph sighs, "You wouldn't understand, okay?" 

"What do you mean, I haven't seen you in over and month and suddenly you wanna be secretive! Is this guy like your new fuck buddy or something?" I nearly laughed on a final breath, stepping away. 

"What, no!" Raph argues. 

"Enough. Both of you, fighting it won't solve what's going on here. Forgive me, for my manners, but controlling this man has been a royal pain in my ass for the past few weeks or so. But my name is Cayden. I've been mentoring your er, brother on his changes," 

I rolled my eyes, "I don't give a crap what your name is dude," 

"Mikey-" Raph warns.

"What changes is he talking about?" 

"Jesus, this is a mess," Cayden says, crossing his arms. 

"I couldn't let today be the day I wasn't around ya, alright? I can't tell you anything about what's been going on. I'm sure Donnie will figure it out sooner or later, he's always been the smart one, and so have you, little bro. Whether you're blood or not, you'll always be mine, so, Happy Birthday-- okay?" Raph says, making it sound like a goodbye or some shit. 

Today officially couldn't get any worse. 

I didn't respond to him, my head started hurting and maybe even the world was trying to swallow me again. If anything I was beginning to get angry. I was holding it all back for so many days in the grief for this one person. I simply couldn't hold it back anymore. 

I peered up at my brother, remembering his sweet but angering words. Then I turned my attention to the new guy in the picture. He said he was mentoring Raph. For what, I don't know. But he annoyed me just by looking at him. 

The look in his own eyes was pretty similar to Raph's. But he reminded me nothing of him. Shaggy black hair that hung almost in his eyes. All black clothing with an obvious pattern of tattoos and a few occasional piercings that made him look pretty presentable. 

Why was I commenting on this dude's appearance?

I curled my fists inward and let out a soft breath and in the back of my mind, I could still hear my brother's voice telling me to chill out. But the world around me wasn't moving anymore. I stopped caring. 

"I blame you," I muttered at Cayden, earning a look from the both of them. 

I swung my arm at him and connected my fist to his jaw. He didn't flinch, he didn't move. My whole arm felt like it was vibrating and I was suddenly welcomed with an amount of pain in my hand that immediately became unbearable. 

I fell onto my knees holding my wrist while hearing my brother shout at the other guy about what he just did. But even I didn't know what he did. My whole hand was burning and aching and I couldn't help but began to sob out of pure agony. 

"The fuck did you do!" someone shouted. Probably Raph. 

My head began to spin uncontrollably, and I went as far as seeing purple spots in my vision. I looked all around me, and the last thing I saw was the one I missed most. 

But I thought about it for a sec, and hey-- I got my wish after all. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> I'm sorry for the major delay on this chapter. I've been going through some things here lately that involve my health and of course, day to day life decisions that include socializing and again, stress. 
> 
> I'm super thankful for the feedback my story has been getting since I've posted both novels on here. It's gotten so much further from Wattpad and even here and I have no idea how to explain how happy it makes me to know you're enjoying this as much as I am writing it. 
> 
> I'm also going to try and start writing out proper summaries for you guys, but I won't expose the whole chapter because I love surprises in a good story- but I absolutely hate them in real life. Am I the only one? 
> 
> Anyway, I won't let this drag- I love you all and thank you again. For any further information, use my contact info in my bio, or simply leave me a comment. 
> 
> Cowabunga! 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	12. ᵀʰⁱˢ ᴵˢ ᵀᵒᵒ ᴹᵘᶜʰ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey returns home, except this time, he has an injury and it wasn't Raph's fault. His brothers are coming to a conclusion of what could be going on with their hot-headed sibling and finally, they nail the details. Or at least, they think. 
> 
> Leo starts thinking too much and even becomes angry with Raphael. What he plans to do is only a mystery that could end him up hurt, or worse.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣ|

ᵀʰⁱˢ ᴵˢ ᵀᵒᵒ ᴹᵘᶜʰ

[ Leonardo ]

"Is he alright?" 

"He's fine. Though I'm unable to tell by too much without being able to do X-Ray. But, I am pretty sure his hand is shattered in four different places. It might be a month or two before it completely heals. You should know how our bodies are. Mutation and all," Donnie answers not taking his eyes off of the computer screen in front of him. 

"What about his brain scans?" I glanced at Mikey, who was sound asleep on the table. 

About an hour or two ago, there was a company at the front door. And when we opened it, we figured it was someone who lived in the apartment building as well, or possibly the Tribunal again. Mikey was lying on the carpet in front of the door. His skateboard was missing and his hand was completely blue. We couldn't figure out how this happened. We wouldn't be able to until he woke up, which hasn't been likely since yesterday. 

"There are many unknown interruptions from yesterday's period until today-- it being twenty-four hours later I'm seeing some readings that are um, well, very strange," he finally answers adjusting his glasses. 

"What do you mean, strange?" I asked coming forward to get a look at the screen myself. There, I saw many different lines in a diagram that adjusted to Mikey's brain waves from natural living to ones that didn't match up at all. It was as if someone made these for him, or even he made these himself. But Mikey didn't have that kind of brainpower like Donatello did. He had abilities that involved many electrodes. He could manipulate the cities power supply if he wanted. 

"You can clearly see that whatever happened to him, wasn't on his own terms. It was another person or thing-- Though clearly not human. It's a bit intriguing if I am honest. I haven't seen brain activity like this in a long time," Donatello says, sounding a little more excited than worried for our sibling. 

"He's not a science experiment, Donnie, he's our brother!" I confronted, almost slamming my hand down on his desk. He glared up at me when I did so, which was a look I always feared about him. He had one of those death stares that nobody really enjoyed. 

"If you wanna figure out what happened to him, then I'd advise you to not shout in my lab again, Leo," he warns, making me look away from him. But just as I did, a groan sounded off the walls in the room, which made me immediately look at Michelangelo. 

He was waking up, looking a little groggy at first. 

I stepped forward and took his good hand into mine, "It's okay, little bro, you're home," 

"W-where's Raph?" he asks, looming around the room like he was somewhere unknown. 

"Raph?" I shook my head, "He's not here. You know that,"

"He was. He was here, with me. In s-south side," he argues, obviously confused. 

Whoever he was with, or whatever he got mixed up in, messed him up pretty badly. I was tired of crap like this happening to Mikey. He always seemed to take the worst of it all and no matter how good things got, it always landed back on him. 

"Okay, you said Raph was with you. Was there anyone else, Mikey?" Donnie questions while wheeling his seat towards the table. 

It took him a minute, "Someone else was there. He said he had been mentoring Raph. Basically taking care of him. I remember getting angry and-" he paused, glancing at his hand that was wrapped up pretty tight. I noticed Mikey's lip quiver, "I hit him,"

"Hit who, Mikey?" I questioned further, becoming a little heated myself.

"He said his name was Cayden. Raph told me not to worry-- that all things will come clear eventually. He looked different you guys. Like Raph, but- not Raph," Mikey almost stumbled over his own words and I growled lowly turning to Donnie. 

"You need to get back to work on analyzing Raph's blood. I'll help you. I'll do whatever it takes to find out what the hell is going on, because I can already tell that, that idiot won't set foot here to tell us himself," 

Donnie nodded with a small gulp in swallow, "It's not as simple as you think. I've told you. The sample, it breaks apart. It isn't even compatible-- wait," Donnie interrupted himself, wheeling his chair back towards the table opposite of us, "Give me your hand," 

"What?" I asked, "What for?" 

"You said you'd do whatever it takes, so, give me your hand," Donnie answers and I reluctantly drew my hand towards his and he took it while picking up a sharp shaped object from the left of me and I almost pulled away, "Stay still," Donnie added. 

"Donatello!" I nearly shouted. Was he seriously going to cut into my hand?

Donnie pressed the tip of the scalpel into the surface of my middle finger, surprising me a bit. I winced when the blade pierced my skin and immediately, blood rose to the top which gave Donnie the perfect opportunity for a sample I guessed he needed. 

But why exactly did he need my blood?

Donnie soon let go of my hand and took the sample that he put on a plastic plate and stuck it inside of a thing that he once explained that measured blood types, the mixtures and what not. He had a lot of this high tech stuff now, and I was completely lost with it. I was more used to the lair tech than anything in the world. 

I missed it. 

"Why do you need my blood? I thought you already figured out that me and Raph's blood wasn't compatible," I said, watching Donnie work. 

"It's not for that. I'm more likely seeing what will happen if I mix the samples together. Because in this sample of Raph's blood, it's obvious it's his, but then again, it isn't," he replied not looking away from the device in front of him. 

"He didn't seem like himself either. But then he did. Like he was being forced to control himself," Mikey commented from behind us, "His eyes, they weren't the same,"

I looked at Mikey over my shoulder as he lowered his head, not taking his eyes off of his bandaged hand, "What did you see?" 

"Red," answered Donnie who slowly pulled away from the microscope, and he almost looked pale. 

"Red?" I chuckled, uncrossing my arms from my chest. 

"Mikey's right. It's Raph. But it isn't," Donnie explained, looking limp, "His blood is almost like, glass, or even iron," 

Mikey sat up on the table and hopped off, "Raph's eyes were red," 

"Are you sure you weren't confused with his mask?" I laughed again. Feeling like this was some kind of joke. 

"Leonardo, you know for yourself that we aren't the only things in the world that are either mutated or supernatural!" Donnie interrupted, forcing me to stop laughing. 

I looked between both of my brothers, realizing that they were serious. The impossible had become possible and the unreal had become reality in the blink of an eye. There was an even bigger chance that Raph murdered more than three men, gotten away with it, and now he had someone mentoring him. 

Like Sensei did. 

"Then what is he?" I suddenly asked as Mikey arrived at my side. 

Donatello pulled the samples from the microscope and laid them aside to each other and pointed at the one on the left, "This one is Raph's blood from May, and then the other one is actually the one you collected from the sight in the south side. They both are completely different from the last. The color is even different," 

"It looks kind of, purple," Mikey said, as I stared at the samples. 

"Venom. It reminds me of snake venom," I said, pointing out the shiny coagulated liquid in the small plastic plate. It was as if someone dumped fairy dust in there. The blood was still red, but not red enough to be human or even our blood. Our blood was different from humans, but it still looked good enough for any young child's blood. 

"Raph definitely didn't have fangs if that's what you're saying" Mikey confirmed. 

Then it clicked, and I felt like Donnie was thinking the same exact thing because when Mikey spoke, we immediately looked at one another. 

"Is that even possible, for him?" I asked Donnie, staring at the blood again. 

"Possible? Yes, by a thousand percent. Our blood would be compatible with any further mutation. But this uh, mutation. Wouldn't be like any other type of mutation. It would more or less turn him invincible to the very um, brim. He would be unstoppable. He already sort of was, but now. If that's the case. We're too late," Donnie answers. 

"Can you guys speak English, because you've totally left me behind," Mikey whines, interrupting my thoughts. 

I looked down at Mike and shook my head, "We're just thinking about the possibilities. The men, at the murder scene. They had a few broken bones, but nothing gruesome, except for the amount of blood loss," 

"How much blood loss?" Donnie questions with wide eyes, and for a minute he almost looked cute. 

The memories of seeing their bodies came to thought. No stab wounds, gunshots. But then I remembered. I remembered something that completely slipped my mind that day. I was more worried about my brother being hurt. Or worse, dead. I didn't care or give a shit about those guys. John's men were always impolite anyway. 

While they were being loaded into the back of a van, I saw a messy gash on one of their throats. It was a bite, but not like other bites and it definitely wasn't human. Again. Nothing in our lives was human. Except for April's son, and even then, he was being raised by us, so even that made him less human. 

"Gone," I finally answered, making Donnie sigh. 

"I think we basically got our answer, Leo," 

"Wait!" Mikey exclaims with a frown, but he looked happy in some odd way, "Are you guys saying that, Raph, is a freaking vampire?" 

Donnie blinks, "Well, sort of. Yeah. But I wouldn't technically call it a vampire. I would psychologically say that he is in fact a fledgling immortal," 

"We need to find him. Immediately. I wanna speak to this, Cayden. This guy doesn't even know Raph, and I'll make damn sure that he knows that,"

"Leo, that might be dangerous," Donnie informs with a sigh, "There's a reason why he's not coming home, and we just figured it out," 

"That other dude did mention that he was risking my safety," Mikey adds, "Raph even pushed me away when I tried hugging him,"

"He was trying to avoid killing you, Mikey," Donnie says, putting a hand over his shoulder, earning a frown from our little brother. 

"He wouldn't do that, would he?" Mikey asked, looking up at each of us with his big piercing blue eyes that truly broke my heart. He was being put through so much, and Raph was one of those reasons. 

I wondered what he even did to that guy when Mikey broke his hand. He brought him home, and that was it. No letter, or explanation. He was really beginning to get underneath my skin again. I didn't wanna start fights with my brother. Especially now that I know what he's possibly capable of. I couldn't help but become angrier than before, because Mikey was grieving and so was the rest of us in some sort of way. 

I haven't been able to actually sit down for a whole month and not have a reason to think about the last few months. It was completely different now. Life was, I was. My brothers were by default. 

I needed to speak with Raph. Get his attention and ask a few questions that he probably doesn't wanna answer. Without Mikey worrying him at my side, I could get him to open up. If not, then I'll force it out of him. 

"Where are you going?" Donnie asks, grabbing my hand. 

I turned my head to look at him and he obviously didn't want me to leave, "I wanna talk to him. I wanna figure this out even if it's dangerous. But if he hurts me, it'll be something that he has to deal with. Not me," 

"That's the thing!" Donnie growls, "I don't want him hurting you! And if you're going- then we all are," 

I look towards Mikey, "I don't think it's the best idea to bring him along with us," 

"Why not?" Mikey says, "It's not like I'm gonna break my other hand, dude!" 

"He could have killed you! That guy who actually broke your hand could have done much worse, who knows who he is, or even how old he is!" I said to Mikey making him cower. 

"Alright, Leo, that's enough," Donnie defends, "He didn't know. He just misses his mate. We all miss him, and you do too!" 

I frown and look down, "I'm sorry. I'm just trying to figure all of this out. I'm tired of going through these spells with Raph, and I'm definitely not prepared for what he's become, I don't think neither of us is,"

"If you go, we all go talk to him. If it's dangerous, then we're meant to stick together like a team, in case it does get bad. Like we used to," Donnie says, caressing my cheek, "Don't you ever miss those days?"

"Donnie's getting all mushy!" Mikey teases breaking my frown, and I broke into full-on smiling as I hugged both of my brothers close to me. Mikey giggles when I do and Donnie happily returns the favor. 

"I miss them more than you think," I say with a sigh, squeezing them tightly. 

"Then let's do it more often because I sure miss kicking ass with you guys," Mikey chuckles, finally pulling away and making sure he doesn't hit his hand on anything. 

"I'll be sure we start on some training again. And maybe, I'll even let you guys join me on the next job, John gives me," I grinned, earning one in return from my brothers who looked equally as happy as I was feeling right about now.

Though, I couldn't help but think about the upcoming few days. We needed to think of a plan, or just simply go over there. I don't know. I needed to figure it out. And soon. 

I was tired of the negative, and I was tired of playing nice. 

Enough was enough. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	13. ᵀʰᵉ ᴹⁱˢᵗᵉʳ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, we travel back in time to give you all a little backstory on my OC. I'm sure some of you didn't want this. But he is a completely new character that I'm adding in this series because I have no use for him in other places except for my novels and the only novel I'm working on is this one, so. 
> 
> If you wish to have more backstory then I will gladly give it. But if not then please enjoy the upcoming chapters for Pick Your Poison, because it's gonna get a little tricky. 
> 
> Merry Christmas!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣ||

ᵀʰᵉ ᴹⁱˢᵗᵉʳ

Over a century ago, the immortal blood of a boy was born. He grew up to be a reader. He was taught to have a love for writing from his birth mother. His father simply taught him nothing. 

He was your typical everyday child who played in the sun and never got in trouble. His head was full of the blackest hair and his father had once mentioned that he reminded him of a raven and that one day he would make the world crumble at the very tips of his fingers. 

He was right. Except, he crumbled himself instead and went completely under the realm of natural reality. As the years grew grey- his father became abusive and eventually his mother had passed due to a plague. 

She couldn't read to him anymore, but he could remember her face and sweet words. During the services, a woman with red hair, who he had been told was his mother's sister, said that if he ever needed anything- to come straight to her, and not a single other. 

He was confused and conflicted due to never knowing about this woman and he had wondered why his mother never mentioned her. But he let it go and went on to become someone completely unknown.

His father became weaker, and soon he too was becoming sick. The boy with raven hair didn't seem to care, but he still managed to make sure he lived anyway. And during those days, he pulled a box from the top shelf in the master bedroom and found his mother's old sheet music for the piano downstairs. 

He was immediately drawn to it because this music was the only thing that helped him get through the times without her. He was alone in this world, at least to him, he was. Even the school system didn't seem to help. 

By the age of nineteen, Cayden Anthony Jacob Prince had bought his own book store and met a pretty lady by the name of Lillian Alyssa Myers. She became his everything as the days went by and not a single tear had dropped since the first day he laid eyes upon her. 

Her hair was in waves of strawberry blonde locks, and her skin only reminded him of the sweetest pale plums. He was taught to be poetic, yet drawn to ladies of opposite color in personality. He loved an adventure, a challenge. That reminded himself of how his father was and he personally hated it. He, unfortunately, had many perks from the man who beat and abused him as a child even if he didn't clean something the right way. It was an everyday thing really. But eventually, Cayden grew used to it, and eventually, he got too big for it. 

He was packing on at least six-foot in height and he grew up to be a naturally muscular man and quite thin, and nothing no more thought to mess with him. Cayden was also always outgoing and that was what kept him close to people of his time. He made many friends. But didn't keep them close for very long. 

Some time into the months of the nineteen-hundreds, he disappeared. 

A fire started later that evening at the Old Saints Book store and a body was found. But it wasn't his. The woman, the young girl Cayden helplessly fell in love with was found and pronounced dead in the rubbish. And then he too was officially pronounced missing not long after. 

Even though the police didn't blame him for such an accident, he still blamed himself and in the end, Cayden hit rock bottom and never got up again until one fateful night during a visit in his favorite bar. 

It wasn't much of a choice that was in his hands. It was in societies and he already felt less a man for letting his lover die. And now, things were only just beginning. 

That night, a familiar face showed up, which led Cayden to believe that he was speaking with his aunt. His mother's sister. But this woman, her face was so crimson, so unnaturally beautiful. It practically made him sober on the spot. But nothing could faze this man. As he so thought. 

The woman spoke softly and poetically which reminded him of his mother again. She manipulated him into opening the flood gates of his emotions with the swoon and sway of free drinks because he couldn't pay for his own. It was her very own mind game, and soon, he had noticed something different in her eyes. It didn't take a genius to see it. And being completely drunk didn't seem to stop that from happening either. 

So, he left. He felt it. He could basically smell the danger behind her voice. The temptation was real. But he couldn't let this happen again. He wasn't ready. Not after Lillian. Not ever again. 

He was cursing silently to himself when he wandered into an alleyway and was greeted by at least four men, and one held a gun to his face. He didn't react at first, but he immediately felt afraid as this has never happened before. Not even back home did these sorts of events occur. 

"I-I'm sorry, but I don't really have any money, fellas," he had told them but they all laughed and shuffled around with him anyway and began to grab at his clothes and search his pockets. Finding a wallet, with only a single picture inside. 

When the man who pulled the wallet out, found the picture, that's when Cayden came to the reality of the situation and snapped. He tried to snatch it back, and these Swiney thieves only laughed it on because of how weak he was due to the alcohol and continued their play. 

He was getting angry- and dizzy but when he went a little too far and reached for the gun, the trigger was pulled and the bullet fired, echoing for miles in this small garbage for a town. 

The raven-haired boy that everyone once knew as sweet, kind and outgoing was of no more than someone who tried to defend himself during a robbery and was shot. 

A single wound between the eyes did the trick of course, and when someone finally found him, the picture from his wallet was placed on his chest in pieces as if someone had completely shredded it as a pity joke. 

The police had been called, and when they described an appearance, one of the officers recognized him and immediately took the job for himself. But when he and the medical team arrived, his body was found missing. 

Someone had stolen it. Or in their report, the man wasn't shot. 

"Maybe he just got up and walked away" the male paramedic commented surveying the area in the alley. 

The officer scoffed standing inches from a pool of blood that was nearly dry by now, "A man can't get shot in the head and walk away, Tommy!"

"How would you know, we have all kinds of crap going on now. You' see that incident where the lady jumped from a four-story building and survived? Come on, man. Maybe it was just a prank call, and that's just ketchup," he laughed packing up his gear and putting the bag strap over his shoulder. 

"Yeah. Right. Right, that's ketchup. I've been on the force for nearly twenty years, Tommy and you wanna tell me that, that's fuckin' ketchup! Get back to work!" the officer shouted rubbing the space between his eyes, still fixed on the bloodstain. 

Who even was it that made the call? One of the people from the bar perhaps. Maybe the owner? Or just a citizen that didn't know how to help him. It was a woman that didn't reveal her name. She was practically screaming into the phone that she found a dead body at Tompson's bar near the alleyway. 

She hung up not long afterward. And now, this whole thing was just another mystery to add to the files in a drawer somewhere. Many cases go unsolved and this one was unique for some reason. At least to Officer Petty. 

That was just that, and that's where it would be left because, after that fatal night, no one, or nothing came to conclusion to where Cayden Anthony Jacob Prince had disappeared to. His body was never recovered. But not long after, more people ended up missing and the cycle continued.

[ Cayden ]

A Diary Entry

To my stars, I curse in a bitter vow. I have become something I have no control over. I have a thirst, an appearance I can't come to grip with. My eyes no longer remind me of my mother, and my skin no longer remind me of the Seattle sun in late July. 

I've become some monster from a storybook I read as a kid. Perhaps Dracula wouldn't agree and neither would my dreadful father. 

I miss music and the wake of sleep. I've counted at least one hundred and thirty-seven days since the last time I slept. So I remember. I'm not sure. But I'm pretty sure I feel the same way every single day. I look the same, and nothing ever changes like my life had had a lock put on the timer fragment. 

It's as if I don't age. 

It scares me, but it's also thrilling. But, maybe I'm the crazy one. I'm the one who should be in a mental ward for people who believe they are completely invincible. 

I've seen it on television and in the books of course. But this nagging feeling in my throat keeps burning and aching and when I look in the mirror, my eyes look like crimson orbs, or maybe the reddest of rubies. I couldn't choose which is more beautiful. And most importantly I couldn't quite understand why I was enjoying this. It felt so interesting-- and I felt better than I have in months. Not since-- Lilly. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song Dedication.
> 
> Carter Burwell - Love Death Birth (From The Original Soundtrack Of Breaking Dawn Part 1)


	14. ᴱⁿᵈᵗᵃᵖᵉˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coming up on "Pick Your Poison" 
> 
> Donatello finally tracks down Raph, and the four meet eye to eye for the first time since his disappearance. The three get introduced to Cayden and Leo get's a warm welcoming into the future and is pushed to his wits when a final decision is made that could change their lives forever.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

ᶜʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣ|||

ᴱⁿᵈᵗᵃᵖᵉˢ

[ Leonardo ]

"Are we going out today?" disturbed Mikey who was meant to be keeping quiet and trying to concentrate on his own meditation. 

I slowly opened my right eye to peer at him under the dimmed lighting and nodded my head "Yes. We just have a few more preparations to make before we make any more mistakes" 

"Mistakes?" Mikey scoffs planting himself on the rug in front of me and now I was fully looking at him. His face was scrunched up which made his bandana crinkle. He was adorable when mad, but we had to focus on the new plans I was making as promised to Donatello. Which couldn't join us today. 

"Yes, Michelangelo. Mistakes. We've made enough of them since last year and I'd rather not let them repeat. We have practiced training and made quite the improvement," I say cracking a smile at him who remained grumpy. 

"I still have trouble with those sharp objects," he smugly said positioning his legs over one another in a crisscrossed formation. 

"I told you if you keep at it, you will get the hang of it. And why worry so much? When you're in the zone as the rest of us, you completely forget that you were bad with them. I've seen you kick some major tail with those weapons since you got them," 

"I try--thanks," he answers with a light blush on his face, "So, when are we going out?" 

I exhale, "After this session. For now. I need you to do exactly as I do. I wanna teach you something that Master Splinter taught me when I was a kid,"

"Why did he only teach you the cool stuff?" Mikey moans getting into position in front of me, finally obeying as I say. 

"Because, Michelangelo. When the rest of you were younger, you three didn't really care about this kind of stuff. I did. You cared about running around and playing with toys. Donatello loved his science and not even Shredder himself could pull him away from it. And, Raph," I paused, frowning suddenly, "He was always mad about something" 

"He always thought you were the favorite, dude," Mikey comments making my shoulders lower in a shrug. 

"I miss him too, alright?" I defend, regaining my stance, "Now focus and watch that hand of yours. Don't need you crying again," 

Mikey leans forward and shoves me so hard that I fall back on my shell making me laugh as he crawls over me, completely throwing the meditation session out the window. 

"You ass, I didn't cry!" he says shoving me again and I continue to chuckle. 

"Mikey we're meant to be practicing!" I say trying to get him off of me but he won't budge. 

"Say you're sorry!" Mikey demands sitting on my stomach now. 

I narrow my eyes at him, "No way, I didn't do anything!" 

"Then I'm not moving and I'm pretty sure I've got some pretty bad gas sneaking up on me, dude, and I don't think you want that," he smirks making me roll my eyes at him. 

"How childish, Michelangelo. But I am, sorry" I grit, holding back my own frustration. 

"Now say I'm the sexiest and that I'm the best brother in the whole wide world," he demands further with a growing smirk on his face. 

I growl and just as Mikey starts to laugh at my reaction I flip myself over and catch my brother by the arm and shove his face into the place matt. I sit on his carapace and keep my hand on the back of his head making him struggle, "How's about you say that I'm the best trainer in the whole wide world?" 

"Get off!" he whines struggling underneath me, but I pay no mind as he's fully frustrated me now, "Leo!" 

I glance down at him and slowly crawl off to stand up, "Don't demand me, again," I say to him pointing a finger just as the door to the dojo opens and Donnie appears looking clearly excited. 

"You guys, I found him!" he shrieks running from the room as me and Mikey share a look and follow him. 

The three of us end up in Donnie's lab again, where he's pointing at a computer screen and there, I saw a red blinking dot on the cities worldwide map. I immediately was filled with questions of how he managed to get into NY's security system, but I couldn't bother. 

"That's him?" I asked as Don answered with a quick nod, sliding over to another table making the wheels beneath him on the chair squeak. 

"I've been analyzing the hell out of his blood and it's truly remarkable, Leo!" Donnie gushes nearly making me smile, "I was able to track his exact location because of it. Can you believe it?"

"Don, you're meant to be resting," I said stepping closer to the screen, watching the blinker. 

"I couldn't bring myself to lie there and do nothing Leo. I'm the only one who knows how to do this kinda stuff, and something just told me to keep trying and I was right" he answers leaning back in his chair as I glance at Mikey. 

"So, what do we do now?" 

"Well. The next move to make is to find him. We gotta get some true answers on whether Donnie's science is correct or not. Which, it most likely is, but, having it first hand would be even more satisfying" I say to Mikey thinking for a second. 

"He seems to be staying in an apartment complex kind of like our old one. But, nicer, you could say. His new mentor must own a lot there or something. It's best if we all go, right now," Donnie suggests standing up from his chair, making his growing plastron become a little more obvious. 

"I'm not sure it's safe for you," 

"Leonardo, I told you. We all are going-- I might be a little slow. But I can still fight if I need to," he reassures placing a hand on my shoulder. 

After that, a word wasn't spoken between the three of us. Especially Mikey. When he officially knew that we were going after our brother, he acted as if he was nervous. Though I couldn't quite blame him. Plus he needed to realize that these types of surprises weren't really something new to us. 

Once we made it to the south side of New York, Mikey was first to show us exactly where he saw Raph and of course where he broke his hand. The place wasn't as different as I imagined it would be. It was all run down and honestly at this point, I couldn't even begin to grip my mind around the fact that some people still live here. 

But how I wouldn't know. Donatello mentioned that Raph's new mentor was held up someplace nice. But what would be considered nice in a place such as this? 

"Here," Mikey announced as we arrived on top of a roof with wide-open spaces and a pretty good view of the entire area. It wasn't exactly a skyscraper view, but it was enough to see from A to B.

"This was where you last saw him?" I questioned peering around the area with my left katana drawn at my side. Donatello seemed to be ready for a fight as well as he already had his bo out and everything-- it kind of made me proud to see him on defense so quickly. 

"Yeah. He was alone at first. But then-- then that Cayden dude showed up, trying to tell me that if Raph was around me it could be dangerous for me. And for him because of the um, the murders," Mikey answered lowering his head. 

"So, it really was him," said Donnie who put away his weapon scanning the area with his goggles. 

"I guess so," I mumbled, speaking quietly as I walked forward and scouted around myself but decided to just go for the gut feeling in my stomach and took a big breath of air in through my nose and sighed cooly before shouting out, "We know you're out there, Raph!" 

"Leo!" Donnie scolded me in a whisper like scream but I brushed him off and continued. 

"We just wanna talk. So, show yourself so we can get this over with!" I added in while stretching my arms out, letting my blade remain in between my grasp. 

Silence cowered over us like a cloud for the next few seconds as if something big was meant to happen but it didn't. We waited for what seemed like ever and just as my little brother was about to say something-- I held up my hand to silence him and down came a crash and I glanced up, seeing something familiar. Someone tall, someone different, someone completely under the weather of evil. 

"Go back home, Leo," said the beast. Though friendly-faced but different. 

My brother came into what light was left of this night and I nearly took a step back, "Where have you been?" 

"Places," he answered bitterly glancing behind me, signaling that he's spotted the company who's joined me on this journey and in his eyes, I finally could see what Mikey kept telling us. I could practically smell the difference in our brother. It was strangely arousing and all so heartbreaking at the same time. 

"You truly are someone else," said Donnie who gripped the bo in his hand again, but keeping behind me, "Why don't you let us help you with this?"

"Because you wouldn't understand!" Raph answers clenching both fists. 

"Is it because you'll hurt us?" Mikey questions, "Because I think you already accomplished that by leaving!" 

Raph's face twists at Mikey's stab and he looked down momentarily before shaking it off, "It's true. I don't wanna hurt you. I could kill ya. Cayden, he says that even if you're mutants like me, I'll still want your blood. And I think he was right because I can smell it from here. I can even hear the thuds in your chest. The stretch and throb of your fuckin' veins!" he curses making me frown. 

"You're coming home with us," I said without demand, "I don't care what this Cayden thinks. We will help you. We will cure you!" 

"And what if I don't wanna be cured, huh?" he argues making me look directly at him, "I've never felt more alive than I do right now!" 

"You aren't even you, Raph!" Mikey shouted, making me tense up, "Do you have any idea what I've been through without you? Do you even care anymore!" 

"Mikey!" I warned, grasping his hand as the look on Raph's face softens as if the old him is still in there. Which it is. And I know exactly how to get it back. I glance up at my brother, "You're scared, Raph. Why would you want to be with someone you don't even know?" 

"Scared?" he chuckles, "You're joking right, Leo? Always the one with the lectures, the assumptions, the fuckin' leadership that you clearly failed on. I mean, look where that got dad," 

"Raphael!" said a stranger who made himself known just as everyone froze in place and out of the darkness came the myth himself I could have guessed alone, "Don't say things like that. Don't ever say such things to people you love. You'll regret it later," he says collectively making his appearance clear. 

Under the lighting, you could obviously tell that he too wasn't human. 

"You must be the new mentor," I greet him holding my composure together with low eyes and just as I spoke he tilted his head towards me and came forward. 

"So, that's where that name comes from. You must be, Leonardo?" he says jumping down from the ledge and holds out his hand while pulling off a leather glove to reveal his inked skin, "Cayden Prince. It's a pleasure to finally meet another young blood of Raphael's," 

I look towards my red-banded brother and grin for just a second as I reach for Cayden's welcoming hand just as he gives me a look that nearly blinds me as if he's warning me. 

When I lock grips with the new stranger everything around me falls like the world became my very own canvas. I was unable to talk or move. My hand though was floating as if he was still holding it in this make-believe world. In front of me, I saw someone not only like myself with a shell but skinnier and a bust for a plastron. He was a she. A female turtle. She was beautiful and shared a similar blue mask like mine except for a single braid going down her back as she spins and flips two spread out fans in between her fingers skillfully. 

She was obviously well trained. But by who? Did she have a master, a sensei like we did? 

The girl turns, throwing her fans in the air and catching them with a single backflip which she lands perfectly then smiles directly at me and bows with honor, "Thanks, Dad," 

I felt my hand withdraw and Cayden let's go of me and the dream disappears. It falls away like a candle melting beneath the lit flame upon its head. My eyes felt large and I slowly backed up, hearing whispers I couldn't quite make out. 

"Leo, are you alright?" questioned Donnie who broke me from a trance I was apparently in. He grabbed my arm, becoming more defensive than before. 

I blinked, "I-I'm fine,"

"I should have warned you. My Apologies about that, I tend to get a little curious with new people. I've seen quite the same visions with Raphael and my word, are they eventful," the stranger says as I gawk at him. 

"What even was that?" I then asked, slightly surprised. 

"He showed you your future, Leo," answered Raph who climbed down from the ledge and was now at eye level. 

I shook my head, "I saw someone, someone--"

"Venus," Raph interrupted mocking my movements. 

I quickly gave a glance at Donnie's stomach, "Beautiful," was all I could fathom.

"I've come to grip with a decision for the rest of you," Cayden says gaining my attention again. 

"Who said you could make any decisions for us, dick? You broke my fucking hand, bro!" Mikey comes to a yelling pitch just before I'm having to step in between the two so he doesn't injure himself further. 

"It wasn't my intention. Believe me, Michelangelo. I've actually come to the thought that maybe it would be a good time for Raphael here, to return to his rightful time,"

"I'm not goin' back there, Cayden!" Raph disagrees only making the tension thicken. 

"Shut up and hear me out. It is possible to go without feeding-- and I'm sure the rest of you have at least a million questions, and I can gladly give them as long as Raphael here promises to never turn another," Cayden explains, stretching a hand towards our crimson sibling. 

"What do you mean turn another?" Donnie steps in. 

"For him to fully commit to his new lifestyle, there are rules, changes to go through. We haven't even fully gone through a proper introduction, but as I said. Hear me out. In order to fully commit he has to kill another and feed them his own specimen," 

"Wait, are you saying there's a chance he can be saved?" I ask, without thinking as Raph silently argues to himself. It was purely obvious. 

"Yes, but it's risky-- though, it isn't something he wants. But out of the respect of myself and the return of my own apologies, I'd give this to you. And Raphael, this chance for your family to have their brother back," Cayden says gesturing to the three of us.

As this man speaks, my mind isn't entirely made up, but for even a second. I had a thought. A really bad one too, but it could possibly change everything about me, my family and of course my brother who has wanted it since he was old enough to voice it. 

I glance up at Raph, and part my lips, "If you come back, not for me, or Donnie. Not even Mikey if you're gonna be that selfish, but for the child our brother is carrying-- which is apart of your DNA. I can offer you one thing in exchange for your return," 

I see a glimmer in his eyes just as the conversation around us dies down, "Alright?" 

I peer at Donnie and sigh, "You come back, I will no longer be a leader and you will step up to the plate and claim the spot you've been dying for since we were born," 

"Leo!" Donnie says practically punching me in the shoulder, but I ignore him. 

Me and Raph share a look for what seemed like minutes until a huge grin stretches across his face, "Deal," 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	15. ᴾʳⁱᵐᵉ ᵀⁱᵐᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Raphael finally agrees to come home, Leo orders a meeting in the dojo about Raph's leadership and Donnie and Mikey have a heart to heart and possibly a confession. Then things get heated when Mikey finally breaks down and says what he's thinking about the whole situation.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣ||||

ᴾʳⁱᵐᵉ ᵀⁱᵐᵉ

[ Donatello ]

Once we were back home, I couldn't hold myself back any longer with anger. Leo completely crossed the line and I was baffled with confusion.

"Are you insane?" I shout as soon as we walk through the door and the only thing that my mate could do was look at me, "You have no idea what you've done and letting Raphael be in charge will not be a walk in the park! He doesn't even care about making this family right anymore, he just cares about it for the control!" 

"I know, alright!" he interrupts, rubbing his head, "I know why he's always wanted to be in charge. I know exactly why Donatello, I'm not stupid! It was a decision that was made for specific reasons and those reasons will be taught to him as time goes on," 

I shake my head, "Sensei wouldn't want this. He would completely go against it," 

"Then I guess he'd have to get over it," announced our older brother who just walked in the door and for once he was alone. Though in the light, he was more different than I thought. It made me curious but scared all at the same time, and now, he as a leader. Nobody knew what would happen. 

"Yeah, welcome back, asshole," I said glaring at Raph who only kept a grin on his face that called selfish to me. 

"Hey- that isn't a way to be talkin' to your new leader, huh? So, how's about you tone down the attitude before I start up my own Hashi chamber," he smirks at me with piercing crimson eyes that only seemed intimidating and dangerous, but I knew deep down it was just a mask. 

"We need to start by having a meeting in the dojo to get things started with your uh, leadership," Leo explains clearing his throat as our older brother practically stands over him. 

"Fine. For one last time, I'll obey by your say, Leo," Raph says walking past the three of us, obviously knowing where the dojo is. Leo follows him, which leaves me alone with Mikey and I sigh loudly needing to sit down. 

"This is completely crazy" 

"What does this even mean?" Mikey questions, planting himself next to me. "He's so different, D,"

"You're telling me, Mikey-- I don't know what Leo was thinking!" I grumbled to myself, rubbing my temple frustrated. 

"You need to take it easy though, Don. Me and Leo I'm sure will figure something out and for once, you don't need to worry-- in your condition at least," he says staring at my stomach and I look down at it myself, nearly forgetting for the millionth time. 

"I keep forgetting" I mutter, rubbing my hand over the back of my neck, "And I keep reminding myself that Raph doesn't care that it belongs to him too," 

"I miss him. I miss the way he used to be," Mikey mumbles to me, curling his fingers around my hand and bringing it into his own and I frown. 

"It's not too late. None of it is, Mikey-- if we can't make him as normal as we are about now, then, we can just help him be the way he used to be," I say trying to reassure him but his own frown never fades. 

"I hate it here, dude," he suddenly answers, gripping my hand. 

"I thought you liked the penthouse?" I asked glancing at him from the side and he looked even sadder than before. 

"Well, I don't Donnie. I miss the sewer more than I ever did. I thought I liked it here. I really did because it seemed great at first! It even sounded awesome like wow, a new life, new stuff and technology and all the food I could ever ask for, but dude, it isn't. I'm really beginning to hate it. I miss being somewhere of my own style, my own, what's the word-- habitate?"

"Habitat?" I tilt my head and almost laugh. 

"Yeah!" he beams, earning a giggle from me, "My own habitat. I miss it," 

I look down, "I can see why-- I wouldn't wanna change my use for technology right now, but being back in our lair would be nice. I sometimes feel like we never have privacy with Jameson always caring for Codey-- which I feel bad for. I mean he does everything for us," 

"That's the issue, D," Mikey sighs, "And now-- now my own goddamn boyfriend doesn't even notice me," 

I look over at him and come close to tears with the subject and I have to ignore the gut feeling and stand up, taking his hand and squeezing it tight, "Who says you need him?"

Mikey stares up at me almost immediately and bites his lip, holding back a smile as he jumps up and hugs me tighter than I think he's ever gripped and I grin and slip my arms around his smaller waist. 

"You and Codey are pretty much all I've got any more," he mutters into my neck as I hold him close to my chest, letting my fingers draw light circles over the patterns on his carapace. 

"You've got someone else too," I whisper in return, almost forgetting that we aren't alone. 

"Leo doesn't care, D," 

I laugh softly and take his hand, stepping back. I place my brother's hand over my stomach and let him feel what I've been feeling for the past couple of days, aiming to hopefully make him happy and as soon as he feels a kick, a smile grows on his face. 

"What was that?" he questions in shock, putting both of his hands over my plastron. 

"Babies tend to do that, Mike," I smile at him as he's practically freaking. 

After a few more seconds, Leo emerges interrupting the moment, "Are you two coming or what? We don't have time to be standing around feeling each other up!" 

"Shut up, dude. Donnie was showing me how badass our kid is gonna be and I hope when he or she comes out, they kick your ass," Mikey states, pulling away and gesturing for me to walk along with him. Which I do. 

Leo soon joins us in the dojo when I sit down by my little brother and in front stood our even older brother, looking proud and smug as the new leader in charge. As Leo would call it, he did this for reasons. But what reason did he have for giving up what he rightfully owned?

"So, where would you like to begin, Raph?" Leo questions, politely placing his hands behind his back to show the respect that isn't needed here. 

I didn't wanna be apart of this. It was stupid and one of the stupidest things my brother could have ever done and that's saying a lot for all the silly things that we've accomplished to do over the years. 

I watched as Raph glanced around the room and tilted his head at me, "I don't wanna be tracked anymore when I leave," he said, making me bite my tongue. He then looked at Mikey who looked just as uninterested as I did, "And you. I don't want you givin' me shit for drinkin' a cold beer or somethin', because I am over the age of twenty-one and not even you can stop me now,"

"Fuck you, dude," Mikey mumbles off, catching Raph's attention making him growl. 

"That will stop as well. No more of this immature bullshit that Leo has obviously failed to teach the two of you, includin' himself. You ladies need to realize who's in control now and when I say jump you don't question how high. You just do it!" 

I lower my head only slightly just as Leo catches my glare and he obviously can tell how upset I am. I'm as far beyond the line where I wanna punch him or worse. Our red-banded brother isn't the same, and he sure as hell isn't capable of running an entire team the way I know Leo can. He had his slip-ups, his mistakes and even his moments. Like the time he nearly killed me. 

I still think about it. But I've forgiven him. I'd give anything if it didn't happen, but I'm unable to turn back time. At least not yet anyway. 

"You should already know the rights, the wrongs and the rules you make are in your own time," Leo explains, standing stationary with his hands remaining behind his back.

The room falls quiet after a few seconds and Raph glances towards my mate, "I do have one singular request," he says lowly and everyone except for Leo looks at him as if he knew what was about to come out of Raph's mouth. 

"We've been over this in the past, Raphael. It isn't happening!" Leo denies, ruling me confused. 

"Hand em' over, Leo, or else I ain't stayin' here in this dump!" Raph demands as I stand up, triggering Mikey to follow in my steps. 

I watched silently as Leo removed his katanas from his shell, but they weren't unsheathed. They were fully covered as he handed over the two blades and stood with his head lowered. 

"The hell are you doing?" I cursed, "You can't take those!"

"Oh, but I can, Donatello. Leo here is gonna experience fightin' without these for a while. And when I feel ready enough, I'll give em' back to him," Raph answers, putting the blades on their stands that were positioned on a table against the wall where candles were lit as usual. 

"You can't expect me to let you take the only thing he's ever known to fight with!" I threatened, stepping forward but Leo stops me by putting a hand over my stomach and giving me a look of reassurance. 

"It'll all be fine. We can get along just fine and I'm sure, Raph has a bunch of new ideas for us. Right?" Leo smiles with a lie, hoping to get our brother's attention.

"Sure do," he answers until something caught his eye and I follow it towards Mikey who looks so angry he could burst. 

I go over to him and grab his hand, being unable to recognize his current state, "Mikey-- don't," 

"I don't know what happened to you," he mutters to our brother who didn't change expressions or even the position he stood in. 

"Mikey," I whispered, feeling his hand begin to shake. 

"I don't know who made this choice for you, nor do I wanna know, bro. But mark my words, I'll kill whoever did. And if it was you who selfishly chose it upon yourself, then I promise you'll lose everything you ever thought cared about you!" Michelangelo practically bursts, as I began to notice the tears rolling down his cheeks and even the ground shaking beneath our feet. 

"You gotta calm down," I continue to whisper to him, gripping his hand tighter as the pupils of his eyes dilate and turn bright orange. 

I think fast and replace my hand with my stomach, letting him feel the possible kicks again and during this, the look on Raphael's face almost brought sadness to me. It had changed all because of our younger sibling's tone. 

Leo was the second to walk over and take Mikey's other hand, "Come on little brother. How's about we get you some food, and we'll go see, Codey. We haven't seen him in what felt like ever," 

"I hate you," Mikey then says towards Raph and cools off to the point where you can see his natural blue eyes and he stops shaking and quickly leaves the room. 

I looked at my older brother and shook my head, "You have no idea what you've done," 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Late New Year Wishes!


	16. Cᵒᵈᵉⁱⁿᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Don and Mikey return to the fields and discuss what there is to do about the changes being made. Raphael has gone rampant and nothing they think of can possibly change it until a familiar face finds them and offers his hand in the situation. And during this, once again, another decision has to be made, but this decision could end up with another loss, or possibly a broken heart.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣⱽ

Cᵒᵈᵉⁱⁿᵉ

[ Michelangelo ]

"So, why're we back here?"

"I needed to get away from him, Donnie," I silently muttered sitting down in the grass and hugging my knees. 

"We haven't been here since we lived at April's place," he mentioned walking around in the grass, making me realize that every flower that used to be here was now gone. 

"I miss her," 

"I think we all do. I think something somewhere inside of Raphael snapped when she died. When Dad died, and then, finding out that we actually aren't related broke him. I think Leo feels the same. He just doesn't show it," Donnie says finally sitting by me, but being careful. 

"They both are doing it all wrong and I don't know how much longer I can handle it, Donatello," I confess, holding my head in both hands. 

"I'm not sure how to make of last year and now. It's almost Leo's birthday and soon, it'll be Raph's. I doubt even Christmas will be the same," 

I squeezed my eyes shut, letting reality hit me like a ton of bricks, "What're you gonna do if Raph doesn't want you having the baby?" 

Donatello glances towards me with large eyes, "He said he saw me die while having it. I'm not sure that I heard him correctly but he did mention a name," 

I blinked, "Venus," 

"The name of the Chi warrior. I haven't run any tests of late. I'm unable to do some on myself without the help of others and I sure don't need my brother telling me what to do with it. I'm having it whether it's a risk to my life or not," Donnie says, lying back in the grass. 

"I can't let you-- we, can't let you die. Nobody else is fucking dying Donnie!" I respond, nearly coming to a shout. 

"Mikey if something happens, there's nothing we can do about it. Plus, I'd like to think positive about the situation. It's only an egg and even after it's out, we will still have to wait for it to hatch," he sighs, rubbing his eyes beneath the frames of his glasses. 

"We gotta do something about Raph," I shook my head, standing up. 

"He's immortal now. His mind is probably swarmed with at least thirty different personalities and he's chosen the pick of the litter and that pick is bad. It's really bad. And Leo, I don't even know where to begin with him. I still can't believe he remotely gave up his leadership," 

I walk around a bit, making circles through the space me and Donnie were speaking in and a possible lead popped into my head, "What if we talked to that Cayden, dude?" 

"What more could he help us with?" Donnie questions, sitting up, "He's done more damage than he has helped, Michelangelo," 

"He said there was a way" I interrupt, "He said there was some sort of way-- or possibility to make things right again,"

"I don't think he cared all too much anyway, Mikey" Donnie tries to argue as another scent lingers into the area, and I quickly turned to catch wind of the intruder we were just talking about. 

"Funny running into you two," the vampire says with a slight smirk, "Don't worry though. I'll keep my distance and your thoughts left alone,"

"How'd you find us?" Donnie questions standing to his feet. 

"Oh. It isn't that easy to avoid such familiar voices, Donatello," Cayden says with such praise, "How's the offspring doing?"

"You mean our brother?" I questioned bitterly.

"You mean your lover, Michelangelo," he quickly corrected, almost surprising me, "I was told quite a lot by him. He definitely doesn't hold back when vulnerable, and this thing I've created, or awoken inside of him wasn't exactly what I had in mind. You have to at least believe me on that," 

"I believe you didn't know what you were doing-- and you especially didn't know who you were messing with!" I growl at him, "You've screwed him all up and now, only God knows what he's gonna do as a leader," 

"Do you two honestly imagine that I have no idea what I've done? I've ruined another family. And when I say another, I mean another. I've never seen one so precise like yours is though. I find it intriguing and trustworthy in many different ways. And honestly, your idea of asking for my hand in your favor was your best bet, because I do want to help you and of course him," he explains, reaching a hand out that I immediately looked at and noticed the gloves he was wearing and that reassured me at the slightest from our last eye to eye. 

This guy could do things that I didn't even think was possible. I thought they only existed in the comics or movies but now, I see the world for what it truly was. Especially after Bishop and all of his antics. And now, if Leo wasn't going to be the leader he needed to be, I guess it was my turn to finally grow up and make the true moves that needed to be done whether it was a risk of getting hurt or even someone killed. 

I reached forward, hesitating at first and I looked up at Cayden and nodded my head, "You aren't going to like, send me on a wild epic roller coaster ride, are you?"

A smile spreads on his pale face and he shakes his hand, "Of course not. I will give my sincere apologies to your brother, Leonardo for making such actions," 

"Can you control it?" I questioned curiously. 

"I can. But sometimes my own curiosity gets to me and I can't simply help from reading someone's future. Or even listening to their thoughts," he answers, grabbing ahold of my hand before I even could make a decision, "But it tends to frighten people, so, today I will refrain, Michelangelo," 

"It's very fascinating," said Donnie who was at my side, standing at the same height as our new friend. 

"You think so?" Cayden replies with a slight smile, "You seem very interested in pretty much anything involving me, Donatello," 

"It may be a stupid question. But how do you know all of our names? I'm sure Raph told you about Mikey- but the rest of us, I doubt it," my brother asks once I'm finally able to retrieve my hand. 

"Raphael spoke highly of the little one here," he grins at me, making me blush an obvious red, "He rarely would tell me much about you or even Leonardo. He mentioned there were others, and of course your father. Though I am sorry for what happened to him,"

"Did he also tell you that Leo refused to let us kill the person who murdered our father?" I asked quickly with a furrowing brow. 

Cayden's face softened at my question, "Leonardo was correct to make a decision as such. If I was the same person as I was so many years ago, I'd of ripped his head off without command or choice. But now, I can reason with my anger no matter how hard it is for me. He chose to not kill that man because he knew spiritually that the man would suffer with what he did anyway. And for him, that was good enough. Even though, the rest of you may have disagreed,"

I crossed my arms, realizing that maybe it was the right decision to make. 

"How do you plan to help us with our brother?" Donnie steps in, obviously not being afraid of Cayden anymore. 

When I looked at his face, I didn't see Raph's eyes, I saw someone softer, and gentle. Someone who was completely fearless but had the heart to admit he still felt emotions. Cayden's eyes weren't red like Raph's were. I'm sure there was a reason behind it, but for now, I didn't bother asking about it. They reminded me of fresh honey and summertime lemonade. I couldn't quite describe it without using such words, but they truly were beautiful up close. I felt a sudden need to know him more. As I was thinking this, Cayden locked eyes with me and bowed his head. 

"Walk with me," he says, motioning for me and Donnie to follow him, and we do, "I have a hard time sitting still, so forgive me. This field is an excellent place to read, or think in. And for my decision on your brother, he needs to realize his wrongs. He needs to see the truth behind what he's become. I didn't influence him to kill those men that were looking for him, and if I tried to stop him, it would have caused more issues," 

"Leo giving up leadership seems to be a game to him. He keeps telling us that he did it for a reason," Donnie says, stepping over the grass in the field. 

"Keeps telling us to wait for the right moment," I said glancing up at my brother. 

Cayden hums, "The right moment and for a reason just sounds like he's doing almost exactly what I explained. When Raphael mutated into something more, I didn't know he would grow such an impulse. He's a wild animal when feeding and being around him when he's angry in the state he's in now, would be suicide to anyone who isn't immortal," 

"We have capabilities of being immortal. But it's mostly because of our blood and of course our shells. It's just facts from the mutagen," Donnie explains, making me think about the true possibilities of us dying or how much it would even take. 

"That's what's truly remarkable about you four. It's nothing like I've ever seen," Cayden says, stopping in the middle of the field, "For Raphael to change. Something drastic needs to happen," 

I looked up at him almost baffled, "What do you mean drastic?" 

Donnie shares the same look just as Cayden notices the bump in my brother's stomach, "You're pregnant," 

Donatello nods and pulls the hoodie he was wearing a little lower to cover the bump, "Drastic," my brother pauses, "Like death," 

"Not happening!" I blurted out, walking away. 

"Michelangelo, it isn't always that. But something needs to happen for him to open his eyes and see what he's becoming! There are ways to reverse the mutation, but now, after he's fed as many times as I've seen on the news. There's no possible way we can help him," Cayden explains trying to stop me. 

"I hate this," I say holding my head, "All of it. This new life, this crap!" 

I felt a hand on my shoulder, "If it'll help at all, I will return with you and be of help along the way" Cayden suggests as I turn to look at him, "It's the least I can do," 

"What else have we got?" I question looking up at him with sad eyes. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> I hope your new years started out as happy as you hoped it would. This chapter was a little short, but it's all apart of the plan. I really hope you're enjoying the delicious drama I am cooking up for the rest of you, because we haven't even begun. 
> 
> It has to get worse before it gets better. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	17. ᴵⁿᵈᵉᶜⁱˢⁱᵛᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During a meditation session, Leonardo gets interrupted by his brothers and an unexpected guest. Cayden breaks it down to him and revives himself as an ally, a friend who can help with their drowning sibling who's beginning to be potentially a threat to him and their whole family. During the conclusion, Leonardo gets a call from the devil himself where the three of them get sent on a wild goose chase and a scare of their life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> I've decided to release the next two chapters early. 
> 
> Why?
> 
> Because I think I've enjoyed writing here the most. It's been extremely helpful and honestly so positive for me. It's kept me going and kept me writing and the motivation sticks with me like glue. These next two chapters was honestly a treat for me to finish up and release for you guys. It's emotionally unstable, action-packed and of course, dramatic as hell and to top it all off, sadness awaits you. 
> 
> Will Raphael finally come to grips with his new body, heart, and mind? 
> 
> For future updates, follow my Instagram or my Wattpad. (It is not required, but if you wish to know when I'm updating or even hints on when the next episode will be finished and released, then feel free) 
> 
> Wattpad : Hydrakinz  
> Instagram : burakkumun
> 
> Until next time, turtle titans, Cowabunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣⱽᴵ

ᴵⁿᵈᵉᶜⁱˢⁱᵛᵉ

[ Leonardo ]

Outside, it began raining again. Since last year, this was the most I had ever seen in Manhattan. The weather reminded me only of sadness and despair, but to many others, it was relaxing and even somewhat peaceful. I've been told that rain can even help others sleep but to me, it's frustrating and incapable of my own sleep schedule.

I slowly shut my eyes and let the waves of new-age fill the air. Though I've never really thought about music until recently and adding it into the schedule with my meditation, helps. I begin to swim with my thoughts as my inner circle refreshes itself and even the smallest bit of positivity clears my head. 

Use what you were taught, Leonardo. 

Don't be stupid. Focus, Mind, and Body. 

I inhaled through my nose and let my mind wander for a few seconds and even hoped in the back of my brain somewhere that nobody would interrupt me, though by me wishing this, I probably would. 

The first thought that came to mind was my father. And thinking this now forced memories over my shut eyes and the void behind them turned into something more visible. I saw images of different scenarios. Me and my brothers as kids, running and playing without a care in the world and when trouble would run across us, the only one we had there, was our dad. We wouldn't be alive right now if it wasn't for April, but Master Splinter gave us true life. He gave us childhood and most importantly, he gave us what every child could dream of having growing up. 

Love. Care. Protection. Discipline, and Knowledge. 

There were bumps down the road and many different hiccups to overcome, but we got through it. We got through every single one because of him. Because of what he taught us. I wouldn't even be who I am today without him. 

Sensei, I miss you. 

We all missed him. Though Raphael, I have no opinion on him anymore. I look at him and see a different brother I grew up with. A different face I learned to hate and eyes that I am beginning to care less, and less for. I wanted to help him. Change him. Do something that could possibly bring the brother I loved and hated all the same, back. 

"Leo," whispered a voice, that surely stopped all my thoughts in progress which ignited a loud sigh to erupt from me, "Is Raph around?" 

"He's out right now, Michelangelo," I answered untangling my legs from one another and turning my head towards the door and there I found my little brother and a complete stranger. 

"Where is he?" he continues to question while stepping into the dojo just as Donatello joins in behind them and as soon as they close the door behind them, I notice exactly who is with them. 

"What is he doing here?" I asked, slowly getting to my feet and collecting my weapons only to realize that I no longer had any. I immediately clenched my fists and took a deep breath, looking towards my brothers. 

"He's here to help, so no fighting-- please," Donnie pleads, stepping in front of our potential ally as if he was protecting him. 

"How is he meant to help, Donatello?" I exclaimed, "He isn't welcome here and he sure as hell can't be of any help now!" 

Cayden came forward, "Please, Leonardo. Hear me out," he says with calm eyes, "I mean no harm,"

I stare eye to eye with him and relax in my shell, obviously not having any choice in the matter anymore, "Fine. Let me hear how the person who started all of this is going to make it all so much better for this fucked up family!" I said, coming to a low growl in my stomach. 

"I understand your anger. In fact, Michelangelo showed me great strength when we met in the field and I'm sure if I let him, he would of straight kicked my ass for even being three feet of him. I've come to realize my definite wrongs and I relate to you on many levels with the situation. You gave up your own strength to show reason to your older brother. You know what needs to happen without anyone telling you. You just refuse to admit to it," he explains, knowing that I know he can hear my own thoughts. 

"Look, he's gonna be back soon. He mentioned that he was looking for someone. I don't know who. But when he gets back, I don't exactly know how happy he's going to be when he sees you. He hasn't really been in a good mood for the past two days and I'm assuming it's because he hasn't-- well," I shook my head, "Killed anyone,"

"I can handle what Raphael throws at me. Don't worry about me. Focus on your brothers and only them. For right now, we need to keep our focus on what his next move is. Because it's more than obvious that he hasn't fed in a while. I'm sure he's out looking for someone to sink his teeth into as we speak," 

"Guys," Donnie interrupts, "Who's phone is that?"

I looked towards the table against the wall and noticed my phone buzzing like crazy and almost instantly I knew who it was calling. I didn't take my eyes off the ID until I was able to reach the phone and pick it up and right as I answered it, I stared at the three in the room, and the look on their faces was known to me. 

"Yeah?" I said into the speaker, lowering my head. 

"Hey- I got a job for ya and the other two ladies. You up for it? Wait, no. Of course, ya are! I nearly forgot that you'll do whatever I tell ya to do," Raph snickers into the phone, making my blood boil, but I endure the silence creeping over me and the entire room, and from what I could tell, Cayden could obviously tell what my brother was saying on the other end, though the phone wasn't even on speaker. 

"Great. What's the job?" I simply asked, rubbing the space between my eyes. 

"Alright. Here's the deal, there's gonna be someone I'm gonna need ya to get for me," 

"Someone? Raph, I'm not kidnapping someone for you!" 

"He's an enemy so, chill, would ya?" he states with an obvious eye roll on the other end. 

I shake my head and turn around to avoid my brothers' eyes, "An enemy? What other enemies do we possibly have in new york still?" 

"Our old pal Baxter Stockman is back in town, and tonight at the grand openin' appearance, he and his valet are goin' to be there. We are to be told that he's back makin' moves with his science crud- which I don't really give a shit about, but I hate the guy so do me a huge favor, and grab him up for me, yeah?"

"So, you want me to kidnap one of the world's greatest professors, for what? To kill him?" I question unable to move. 

I heard another laugh on the other end of the line and it only infuriates me further, "Not exactly-- but only a little bit. The guy was apart of Shred-Head's plans and we never knew what happened to the guy-- but I do now," 

"And how did you manage that--" I asked baffled, just as a scream came from Raph's end of the phone and I held it a few inches away from my head. 

"Don't worry bout' it," he finally answers, barely putting up a struggle as whoever was with my brother was choking on his own blood in the background. The sound made my stomach turn, "Just get the job done and I might just tell ya the story behind our old pal's return," 

When Raph is done speaking he hangs up the phone, leaving me standing there frozen almost. I slowly lower the phone in my hand and put it back on the table, tilting my head. 

"It's something bad isn't it?" I hear my little brother's voice break out of a question I'm sure he wasn't dying to ask this time. 

I turn and look directly at them, "He wants us to capture Baxter," 

"Baxter?" Donnie repeats, "The, Baxter Stockman? From like, four years ago?" 

I nod, looking at Cayden, "I'm gonna need you to stay here. Be here when he gets back because I'm sure he'll be waiting and I'm sure he'll time us," 

"Of course. Is there anything else you want me to do?" he cooly asks, not taking his eyes off of me. 

Pictures flooded my mind of Codey and I couldn't help but think of Jameson too. 

"Where's Codey?" I suddenly questioned, looking towards my mate, where he was locked hand in hand with Mikey and it nearly brought my lips to a smile. 

"He's with Jameson, like usually. Why?" Donnie answered and I swallowed the nervousness and felt almost sick with the thought.

"Wait. Who's Codey?" Cayden asked, holding a hand up in front of everyone. 

"He's the baby we sort of adopted from our best friend. She died a couple of months ago during the birth, and since then, we've been taking care of him," Mikey shrugged. 

"Jesus, a baby? Is it human?" 

"Yeah, what's the big deal?" Mikey said, obviously not thinking as far as me and Cayden was. 

"He could be in danger, Mikey," Donnie answered looking down at him, "Have you seen Jameson at all today?"

I rubbed the back of my neck retracing my tracks, "I woke up at eight this morning and since then, I've mostly been in here. I took a shower around eleven, grabbed some lunch and I didn't even think about it until now. I haven't seen him since yesterday!" 

"What fucking time Leo?" Donnie cursed at me, making me take a step back. 

Mikey released Donatello's hand and quickly ran from the room. We all took off after him, and the first room he went for was Codey's nursery. 

"He isn't here!" our little brother shrieked, running into me trying to leave the room and I caught him by the arm, pulling him against me, "No!" he fought, "That bastard probably killed him!" 

"Michelangelo!" I shook him, "We will find him! Raph wouldn't be that cruel!" 

"Would he?" Donnie added, looking at Cayden who stood quietly after the question was spoken at him. 

"It's a possibility. That's why I asked if the boy was human. And if the butler is too, then it's an even bigger problem. We need to find them immediately" he answers with light words that seized to surprise me. 

I shake my head, "We need to focus on this job!"

"Leonardo, I don't give a shit about the damn job!" Mikey yelled in my face, shoving me forward and moving out of my arms to get by, "D, is in no shape to be going on jobs!" 

"I can handle it, Michelangelo," Donnie sighs, "Can we just get it over with so I can figure out what happened to Codey? I'm trying to imagine that Jameson took him out for a walk in the park, not dying due to our bloodthirsty demon brother biting his head off!" 

I watched Donatello walk past me and towards the front door, already holding his bo staff in hand as Mikey stubbornly follows him. I glance towards Cayden and nod at him. 

"If Codey returns, whether it's with Jameson or not. Keep him safe," I mutter before running off to join my brothers. 

During the travel, we get soaked by the rain and this time, the air doesn't feel as fresh as I had hoped. Nightime was finally setting in and to Donatello's calculations, the banquet or whatever Raph spoke about was starting around seven, when it was only six-forty-two. 

"Talk to me, Donnie. I need a location, something" I said, speaking quietly as we approached a building with flashing lights and a red carpet out front. 

Donnie shook his head, lowering the goggles over his eyes, "I won't be able to see much in this rain. But I can bet that he'll probably be at one of the tables in VIP. It's going to start lightning soon, so, that means they completely closed down any chances for paparazzi to enter, or even get pictures,"

"What's VIP mean?" Mikey questions, crouching next to me. 

"It's like a word or something stupid for someone who is very important," I answer, watching over the edge, "Donnie, do you have your binoculars on you?"

"In my bag in the second pocket," he says fiddling with his goggles as they glow an obvious green color around the frames. 

"How do we plan on kidnapping some dude who is probably six feet tall and at least three hundred pounds?" Mikey points out just as I put the binoculars to my eyes and focus in through a window that pointed down directly over some of the tables inside. 

"He's approximately two hundred and ten to be exact and six foot three inches tall--" Donnie states, just as I reach over and cover his mouth. 

"I don't care how much he weighs, or how tall he is. We'll just steal his car and bring him home that way!" I confirm, climbing over the edge of the building and hopping over to the other side. I make a quick run for the closest door I could get my eyes on and at that, I motioned for my brothers to come forward. 

I reached for the knob and checked if it was locked and sure enough it was. Donatello crouched by the door and pulled out a small blow torch and cut straight through the lock on the entrance and as soon as he got back up to his feet, I immediately let them go in first and I followed closely.

"This door should lead us to an overhang near the stage, and just west of there will be the table, Baxter will be scheduled to be seated in," Donnie says activating a holographic mapping of the building and sure enough the VIP section is west of where we're currently standing. 

I quietly signaled my brothers that I was moving up further and I headed towards the catwalk to look over the stage and the entire room was booked. There wasn't a single seat that wasn't taken and tonight gave away that something really important was going down out there. I didn't bother caring though. I wanted to be in and out and without Donatello and his gadgets, this mission would be more difficult than my usual trips. I don't even remember the last time I was in a serious fight. At least one without bloodshed. But I had a feeling that tonight was going to change that fact.

"Mike, Don," I wave, crouching just beneath the railing so I'm still able to see over the crowd, "Move in, quietly"

I looked straight ahead, hearing the subtle steps my brothers made as they had gotten closer. The catwalk creaked and even wobbled a bit as we three turtles sat on top of it, but I figured as long as we didn't cause too much of a ruckus we'd live long enough to find Baxter and get the hell out of here. 

"Is this thing stable?" Mikey asked, keeping his steps steady for once. 

"Stable enough. Just like we're gonna be quick about this, so, Donnie, find him would you. I'd really like to get back as soon as possible," I huffed, still having the binoculars in hand and as soon as Donnie started looking around I used my own way to and from here, I couldn't really spot anyone I knew. 

"I'm really worried you guys," Mikey sighs, distracting me. 

"Everything will be fine. It'll be even better once we get outta here," I say still looking around, still not having any luck, except for a few news reporters I've seen on television. 

"But what if Raph really does something stupid, Leo? I don't think I can control myself anymore if he hurts Codey. That old dude, James. He's pretty cool, but-- Codey is like our kid, like our little bro. Even though we already kinda have one on the way" Mikey rants on, only making me think about what could or couldn't happen tonight. 

I prayed in the back of my mind that once this job was done, we'd go back home, Codey would be safe and maybe Cayden has talked some sense into his so-called-offspring. 

"He won't, Mikey" I simply deny lowering the binoculars around my neck, letting them dangle.

"Uh," Donnie mumbles, adjusting his position, making the catwalk creak again, "He isn't here," 

I narrow at him, almost laughing though trying my hardest to be serious about this whole situation but I can't help but call bullshit. Raphael wouldn't lie, would he? 

"What?" I asked, "What do you mean he isn't here?"

Donatello lifts his goggles from his eyes, looking up at me, gripping the edge of the railing to keep himself steady, "He isn't here, Leo!" 

"That can't be, but Raph said--" Mikey began but I interrupted with a large growl coming to realization. 

"Forget what Raph fucking said. He lied!" I cursed, regretting my dirty mouth, but I simply couldn't bother caring at this point, "Get him on the phone, right now!" 

"Did you not bring yours with you?" Donnie asked, obviously disappointed with what time we've completely wasted. 

"No, remember, I left it back home in the dojo?"

"Unfortunately Leo, I didn't bring any of the stuff with me that I'd usually bring on a trip like this. I decided not too because it weighs me down right now, and most importantly-- I didn't think I'd even need it!" Donnie sighs, as the three of us stand up. 

"Shut it, drama creams, I brought my cell with me. But you owe me big for making me call Dracula," Mikey demands, rolling his eyes giving me the sudden urge to scold him for such a childish manner but I refrain because now really isn't the time to lecture my baby brother. 

The crowd below us was beginning to get a little louder just as Mikey got his phone out and scrolled through his contact list and dialed our brother's number and it started ringing. 

I snatched the phone from my little brother, earning a loud whisper of, "Hey!" from him.

The call rang a few times and it was making me completely impatient, which was entirely rare in my case, "Pick up the damn phone, Raph!"

"Quiet, Leo!" Donnie scolded just as the call was answered. 

"Raph, you have some major fucking explaining to do! We got all the way over here and Baxter Stockman isn't even here!" I shouted into the phone, not realizing how exactly loud I was getting.

"Leonardo," said Cayden on the other end and I fell silent, "Baxter Stockman is dead,"

"What's he saying, Leo?" Mikey questioned from behind me and I blankly tuned everything out. 

"Someone else is here. A woman. Plus Jameson and Codey still haven't showed up yet. I'm sorry to inform you as such, but I need you to get back here as soon as possible," he says and I quickly end the call, gripping the phone in my hand. 

"He's dead," I muttered. 

"What?" Donnie asked, "Who's dead, Baxter?"

I handed Mikey his phone back, and just as I was about to give them both an answer, the catwalk popped and creaked one last time, and the chains on the far end holding it up gave away. 

"Donnie!" I shouted, grabbing for his hand and thankfully I caught it and pulled him up before he could fall. 

"Dudes, I don't think now is a good time for par core!" he yelled from below us, hanging onto the edge with one hand. 

I leaned over, "Come on, little bro, don't look down!" I say reaching over the edge of the catwalk that I'm sure people were freaking out over, considering the screaming and running away part but I didn't seem to care no matter if the people or security saw what was going on, I couldn't let him fall. 

Mikey struggled to pull himself up high enough so he can grab my hand and as soon as we were in arms reach, I grabbed his wrist and pulled him up with the help of Donnie and once we were in the clear, we got out of there as fast as possible. 

"Thanks for that, dude. I could have broken another bone or something!" Mikey says as we run and jump over to the next building panting. 

"We need to get home, now!" I announced, running a little faster and I didn't even notice how much Donnie was falling back by a few feet. 

I eventually stop and look back, "Come on, D," Mikey said, running ahead, but he stops too, resting his hands on his knees. 

"I can't go as fast as I used to. This running and jumping-- you gotta remember," he says, caressing the front of his stomach. 

"Hop on my back then, we've gotta get back," I quickly said not wasting any time, but Donnie thought it was some sort of joke, "Come on,"

"You can't be serious, Leo," Donnie nearly laughs. 

"I said, hop on my back!" I demanded as my voice came to a shout and he immediately obeyed and jumped on my shell and hooked his legs around me. 

"Man, you're stronger than I thought. With that baby inside of him, I was sure Don would have put on at least a hundred more pounds," our little brother giggled just as we got another running start and made a beeline straight for the penthouse. 

"What did he say on the phone, Leo?" I heard Donnie mutter behind me and at this point, I was struggling to keep up with my own brain. 

"It wasn't Raph, it was Cayden. Said that Baxter was already dead and that there was someone else there. A woman, he said something about a woman," 

"What about Codey?" Mikey added in from the right as we hopped another building and continued our run that slowly turned into a light jog. 

"No news. He hasn't returned yet," I answered with a frown and honestly I thought we all shared one in those final moments. 

After another mile, we finally returned home and hit the elevator with the luck of avoiding the front desk clerk and I smacked our floor number on the wall and the doors closed. I rested against the wall and silently prepared myself for what was about to happen, not knowing if or when someone would die. Again. I don't think I could handle seeing any more of what I had to see in Japan. Though, I doubted I could ever get my wish on that one. 

As soon as the elevator doors opened, I was the first to exit and Cayden was there to greet me as if he knew I was going to be there, which I'm sure he did. 

"Where is he?" was the first thing I asked. 

"He's in the dojo," he sighs, "He's actually pretty calm right now"

"What's been said, what about the woman you spoke of?" 

"Come on," 

I didn't bother looking back for my brothers, I had only one thing on my mind and stopping my brother from killing any more innocent people was my job and only priority. 

Once we're at the door, I slowly make my way inside, already feeling the blood in my veins beginning to boil, "Raph, you have some serious explaining to do!"

Inside, the lights were dimmed down again, and just mid of the floor, I saw a woman. Her hands were tied in behind her back and there was tape over her mouth. Even her clothes were torn and they seemed to be very high in brand from what I could see. Even her jewelry looked expensive. I felt frozen even though I was moving forward and once I was able to get a good look at her face and the black hair surrounding her figure. I immediately knew who my brother kidnapped. 

He was going to kill her. 

"Karai?" 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	18. ᴾⁱᵗʸ ᴾᵃʳᵗʸ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing off from 'Indecisive' Donatello begins to battle alone with his protective fear for Leo, Mikey and of course the familiar face his demonic brother had captured. It all ends here. 
> 
> Or does it?

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣⱽᴵᴵ

ᴾⁱᵗʸ ᴾᵃʳᵗʸ

[ Donatello ] 

The scent in the air made me sick to my stomach. In the corner, I saw a body. Someone familiar, someone I admired at one point. Someone I quickly learned to hate. 

I hated seeing corpses, I even hated the smell of their blood. But being a creature of reptilian heritage, I couldn't ignore it. I couldn't hold my hand over my snout and rid the smell. It wasn't that easy when even smelling it meant you had to taste it. And now, I was at least one hundred and ten percent that my red-banded brother could do more than taste it. 

"What is she doing here, Raph?" Leo asked him, as I watched our friend squirm on the floor. 

"She's our guest, Leo," he answered with a smile, making me swallow the bile building up in the back of my throat. 

"What do you mean? Let her go!" Leo yells, "Untie her, right now!" 

"Are you orderin' me around again, dear brother?" Raph remarks, standing up straight, displaying his full height and stature, which honestly made me fear him, but now wasn't the so-called time for fear. But only fear itself. 

I heard Leo sigh and when I looked at him, his fists were clenched at his sides, "You've taken this proposition to a whole other level! So, yes, yes I am! I'm demanding you to let her go, Raphael," 

"Is that an order?" Raph questions with a slight smirk stretching on his lips. 

I stepped forward, nearly leaning on my mate, "Leo, I don't think this is a good idea," 

Leo tilted his head towards me, silently contemplating his next decision, which wouldn't end well for any of us if Raph even came close to hurting my brother, "It's not only an order. It's a threat alone that you back down and neal," Leo finally answered with a richness to his voice, his accent and the fact that he was serious made my spine straighten. I looked forward, watching our brothers reaction just as Leo added a final line, "Now,"

"Leo!" Mikey whispered nervously grabbing his arm, as did I. The ground beneath us began to rumble and shake just like it did with Mikey before. But this time, I didn't think it was him who was doing such actions. 

The look on Raph's face was almost oblivious to what he just had heard. He looked so stunned that even I thought he didn't hear what Leo had to say but the next move to be made wasn't by any of my brothers, but our new friend. 

"Raphael," Cayden spoke, sounding calm, collected but seemingly frustrated. His hand stretched outwards as if he was reaching for our brother, "I'm sorry to say this, friend. But, Leonardo is right. I'm sorry I did this to you. But you're taking advantage of its power, it's ability and the likes of innocent lives all around you. You could hurt someone you really care about. Like I did," he pauses, sounding hurt, "So, listen to me now, or else you will regret it for the rest of your life!"

"Please, Raph," I heard Mikey plead, knowing that our brother would hear him.

Something was awakening in Leo as Cayden spit his words at our brother, and during such, I didn't think twice to keep him calm. Now wasn't the time to start an even bigger fight and even bigger fight meant bloodshed, it meant that fighting Raph was suicide. We all knew it. 

Silence filled the air and the only thing to be heard was the soft, gruff breaths of air coming from the four of us, including the muffled screams on the floor. Raph's expression changed and now he was slowly making his way towards us but stopping after five steps as him and Cayden came eye to eye. 

I gripped Leo's arm, trying to pull him back but nothing could move him, he felt like a brick wall. 

Raphael popped his lips halfway open, narrowing his crimson eyes at our friend and simply said, "I'm done takin' orders," 

Raph swung his fist upwards, knocking Cayden into the air where he flew over the three of us and smacked into the dojo door. It was all just a blur and Leo wasn't there anymore, I couldn't feel him at my hand any longer. Suddenly, water bursts through the walls. The piping in the drywall was sticking outwards like some sort of hose as water gushed from the ends, immediately spilling onto the floors, making the ground beneath my feet shake. 

The water distracted my brother enough only to realize that Leo was no longer in his reach and I had enough room to twist my leg and upper kick him in the jaw to get away but by the time I turned and went for the door, dragging Mikey with me, Raph caught the tails of my mask and yanked my entire body backward forcing me to fly into the back wall where we kept candles lit. 

"Donnie!" a familiar voice yelled. 

The wax from the candles tipped over, stinging my skin and I winced loudly trying to crawl away. The loud thuds of my brother's footsteps approached me and when I looked up, Raph wrapped his fist around my throat and picked me up, slinging me down, again and again, making me scream out in pain. 

"R-Raph!" I managed, gripping his arm tight enough to leave bruises, "You h-have to stop!" 

The water from the pipes was gushing out harder, quicker, filling the entire room with it as it somehow wasn't escaping through any holes in the room. 

"Raphael!" Cayden shouted, "Let him go!"

I felt the power in my veins clinging to life as I clawed at my brother's forearm. His fingers were wrapped around my throat and I could slowly feel my life slipping away and even my vision was slipping as he choked me. I could hear yelling and the muffled screams, the water. It felt as if the whole building was coming down. 

Donatello, let go. The walls are crashing down and so are you. It's time to stop fighting what's inside of you that is trying to get out. Let go, let the pressure crush you and fill your lungs with the need and obsession to breathe. 

The nerves in my fingers began to tingle and bright patterns of purple covered my arms, wrapping around my hands, wavering through the dark violet cloth on my body and for even a split second, I saw my brothers face, the anger behind his eyes and the pain in his expression. 

Let go. 

Bolts of electricity surrounded my vision, penetrating my cells and shooting straight through to my veins and out of my fingers. His entire frame lit up like fireworks before my very eyes, and Raph let go of me causing me to immediately gasp for air falling to the floor where I caught myself on my bo, that too had the waves of electricity ghosting over its very firm handle. 

The patterns and shapes on my skin never disappeared as I finally stood up, facing my brother who also was breathing very heavily. He narrowed his eyes towards me, ignoring the cracks in the floor that I was sure were about to give out. I gripped the edges of my bo, sending wave after wave of lightning-like speed down through the shaft, fueling my veins of adrenaline and making me forget entirely for the chances of who I hurt, injured or possibly killed at this moment. 

Ignoring my own thoughts, I leaped into the air while switching on the stun effect in my weapon, I slammed down on the ground, twisting and shifting creating a wall of bolts and crackles that reminded me of the stars in the sky that were sure to explode. The floor gave out on my final move, making reality seem like a dream. 

Everyone who stood fell through to the apartment below, crashing and breaking furniture along the way and the only thing in the back of my mind was the noises of breaking glass and maybe the safety of the brothers I actually cared about. I landed on my feet, noticing Raph struggling to get up. 

Behind him, as water poured from the room above, soaking the carpet, I saw Leo. He was covered in cuts and as he was getting up, shards of glass fell from his skin, creating a circle of broken crystal at his feet. He glanced up just as a droplet of blood ran down the side of his head and over his olive cheek. I immediately noticed the cut on his left eye. 

Leo wasted no time and ran at Raph who got up sooner than expected obviously healing from the blow I gave him. Leo punched and kicked his way towards my brother, but Raphael dodged every single one of them, and on his back was something I finally was able to see. 

Leo's katanas. 

Raph was quick to react just as Leo readied himself for another punch thrown and he grabbed the right blade from his shell, unsheathing it and revealing the dried blood that was somehow already on the sharpened edge. My brother quickly span the weapon in his hand, and my eyes widened when I noticed exactly what he was about to do. 

"Leo!" I shrieked, letting the world fall from underneath me. I couldn't even move. My feet felt stiff like they were glued to the ground. 

He was going to kill him. 

Another kick delivered to Raph's chest knocked him back, giving him the perfect chance to swing the blade towards my mate, spinning it until it was straight to a point and just before the end reached Leo, stabbing him, someone replaced him with themselves and in front, I saw a ghost. Someone who let out only but a gasp and a small cry. 

The blood immediately soaked through his hoodie, rendering him speechless. Tears filled his eyes and one single tear fell down his cheek just as the room fell completely silent. 

"M... Mikey?" was all I heard from my deranged sibling just before he yanked the katana blade from his body and dropped it on the floor. 

Michelangelo's eyes were shot and now began to close on their own. He opened his mouth, coughing ever so slightly and spraying our brother in the face with his own blood trying to laugh, "I told you, nobody else--" he struggled, "Is dying!" 

[ Raphael ]

Look what ya did. It's all your fault. I guess your nightmare really has come true, dickwad. 

I felt the sweat trickling over my face, watching my little brother fall. 

What did I just do? 

I held my hands up, and they were covered in blood. The smell filled my nose with such brittle aftertaste and suddenly the look of it alone made me come close to throwin' the fuck up. 

The look on his face, the smell of his own blood. I dreamt of it before. I've seen it happen before. I've seen him die in my head a thousand times and I swore to myself that I'd never let it happen for real. And here I am-- killin' him, myself.

I could finally see it all right in front of me. The look on Leo's face told it all and the stares that were locked in place weighin' me the fuck down felt heavy on my shell. I needed to get out. Leave and cause no more trouble for the only thing that ever gave a shit about me. The only people who ever loved me for me. The people who now hate me for what I've become and I had nobody else to blame but my fuckin' self. 

I clenched my fists, ignoring the aching feeling in my throat as I turned towards the windows in the stranged apartment building that I wasn't familiar with and ran towards the glass, crashing through and falling down at least twenty floors until I crashed into the road below, not givin' a fuck who saw me as I was leavin' everything behind me. The rocks at my toes were now dust as I took off running again. I climbed and tore at whatever I could get my hands on and didn't stop until the thunder roared over my head. 

The rain spotted my skin, washing away what blood was stained on my very flesh. I got halfway up the side of the hospital building when I nearly gave up, throwing myself up and over, landing straight on my knees. I released a sob of disgust and horror and fell forward, digging my fingers into the concrete, cracking it. I began to pound my fists into the ground as hard as I could, wanting to feel the pain I knew I deserve.

I lifted my head, grabbing for the mask on my face, tearing it off and I threw it down letting the heavy rain cover me like a protective blanket. I rocked back and forth and begged for a second chance, and deep down, I knew it'd never come. 

I punched the ground again, gritting my teeth and releasing the loudest cry I think I've ever spoken in my entire life. 

Mikey--

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Song Dedication)
> 
> Show Me How To Live - Audioslave


	19. ᴬ ᴿᵉᵍʳᵉᵗᶠᵘˡ Sⁱˡᵉⁿᶜᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing straight from Pity Party ; Michelangelo takes his last breath. Donatello argues and sets Leo straight one last time before one of the biggest decisions in their brotherhood has to be made in order to keep the team intact.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣⱽᴵᴵᴵ

ᴬ ᴿᵉᵍʳᵉᵗᶠᵘˡ Sⁱˡᵉⁿᶜᵉ

[ Michelangelo ]

In my head, in my mind, I saw things nobody else would want. I heard the disgust in people's voices when they saw me. When they saw my brothers. I remember his words. Sensei. I hear them repeating in my head like a siren spinning on top of a cop car. 

People fear what they do not understand. 

I heard him, I hear him now but I come to question with how long it was going to take for them to understand me. I wondered how long it would take for me to look in the mirror and fully accept the flaw that I am. The person who made me feel everything and above had betrayed us all in one day and now, I feel nothing of myself. 

"Michelangelo!" 

Muffled voices. They were faint, but I couldn't make out what was being said. I figured that maybe this was what heaven was like. If I even deserved to go there. I've heard theories my whole life about it, about hell and about the books of God and people like me not being welcome in such a place. If it even was a place.

"He's not breathing!" 

Whoever was talking about me, I wished I could answer them. I wish I could tell them that I am still here, that there's still life left in me. At least give them a sign. The darkness was slowly consuming me. I fluttered my eyes once, barely making out the blobs of white or black above me.

Doctor's maybe?

"You gotta do something, Donnie!" 

Leo. 

I felt like smiling while hearing the sound of his voice. I knew by then, I was safe no matter what. I knew that after what happened they'd understand. They'd be proud. Sensei would be proud, but scared. But it'll all be okay. They'll find a way to save me. My brothers have always found away. Even if one of them wasn't here to join in on the adventure. 

"I have a pulse," I heard Donnie say as I felt him grab my hand, "But I can't help him here, we need to get him somewhere professional!"

"Well, we can't go to the hospital and the fire department is already on their way! I've tried calling John six times, but he isn't picking up!" 

Fire department? Oh. 

The building-- I nearly forgot. The water, the candles. Raph nearly killing Donatello, and then Leo. But he didn't succeed. I stopped him. I stepped in and actually made something of myself for once. And Codey, we couldn't figure out where he was, or Jameson. It was so much all packed into one and now, now I probably was never going to get to meet my daughter. 

Venus. 

Raph predicted it. He saw it all just before his very own eyes and even for a second I did too. My mind since my Chi has completely changed the way I look at the world, at certain things and specifically my brothers, my lovers. It helped me discover the meaning of love and pain. Even grief. But now, I had to be happy with my choices. I had to use what I was taught, what Master Splinter thought I never paid attention to. 

[ Leonardo ]

Stress fueled my veins, and now my pain no longer concerned me. Minus the cuts and bruises, I didn't care. I didn't care about anything anymore. I let my mind slip, my true feelings and what I wanted to do got to me and doing so, it caused more issues than I had originally thunk. 

My little brother's blood was on my hands and Donatello's bruises were my fault. 

"He's lost at least forty-percent of his blood. There's a possibility I can help him, but I'm gonna need to get him to my place," Cayden said, hovering over me, waiting for my approval. 

"Whatever it takes," I say applying pressure to the wound on Michelangelo's stomach, but the blood already soaking through his hoodie had filled up the rag I got from the bathroom in this place, that currently had a gaping hole in the roof. 

"I have a car nearby so just wait for me here and I'll return as soon as I can," he promises while running towards the broken windows. 

"Where are you going? You won't survive that jump!" Donnie basically shrieks, grabbing Cayden by the arm. 

He looks at my brother, "If Raphael can, then I can," he simply says just as Donnie let's go and our friend jumps out of the window. 

I glance down at Mikey gripping the rag in my hand that's covered in his blood. My fingers are shaking and the sting in my sides was beginning to get to me. I could feel myself getting weaker, but not weak enough to stop moving-- I couldn't give up. I couldn't let myself fail any further. And on top of that, I couldn't keep my eyes off of my little brother. He was a mess. An unavoidable mess that I wished to God I could change. 

He jumped in front of me. Saved me. Sacrificed himself for me. For someone so blind.

"Leo," Don said, interrupting me, "Leo, he stopped breathing!" 

"What?" I finally lifted my head up, looking away from Mikey's face, watching as his chest no longer risen and fell, "Mikey?" 

"Michelangelo!" Donnie half yelled, making my hands begin to shake much worse. 

I gripped Mikey's hand, leaning over him and resting my forehead on his shoulder, "Don't go. Not like this. Please. We can't lose you. We've already lost, dad. Raph," I grimace, "Now you, Mikey!" 

"Leonardo," announced someone who I obviously knew, "We need to get him to my home. I can help him there," 

I turned my head just barely as I looked up at my friend, "How the hell can you help him, he's dead!" I screamed in his face, still sitting on my knees. 

Cayden frowns at me, "I know you understand loss and grief. Amongst many other things, Leonardo. But trust me, I can help him. We just need to get him to my car, and I give you my word,"

Donnie reached across our brother and gripped my hand with tears streaming down his face, "Leo, please, listen to him!" 

"I don't want him to be one of those things Donatello!" 

"If it means bringing him back, then what other choice do we have?" he questions making me cringe at the choice barreling in my head. 

I stand to my feet, wincing at the pain in my side and I nod my head regretfully, "Fine. But we'll need to take the elevator. We can't just jump off as you did," I say to Cayden as he fully agrees, lifting my brother into his arms, automatically volunteering to carry him. 

Just as our friend was taking our dead brother into the elevator, I gave Donnie a final glance just before catching a glimpse of something over his shoulder. Someone maybe. Then I remembered Karai. 

How could I have completely forgotten about her?

I walk passed my brother and over to her squirming body that somehow survived the crash and knelt down, being quick to untie her wrists and remove the tape from her mouth. She was clearly not injured except for a few scratches. Before she was able to speak a word, I helped her up to her feet where she took a moment to catch her breath then finally face me with the sharpest glare I think I've ever seen on a woman, and even a moment, the expression took me back and reminded me just how much I miss our April. 

"I think you have some explaining to do, Leonardo," she says, reminding just how sharp her accent is, and on top of that, the memories I have fighting this woman for years.

"We don't have much time, Karai. My brother, he is--" I paused, taking a breath and sighing at just the thought of what's going on. 

Donnie grabs my hand, trying to reassure me in some possible way and nods his head, "Look. We are sorry that you got mixed up in our brother's mess, but we have to go, if you truly want your answers or to even catch up, then I'll send you our coordinates as soon as we arrive. Please, get yourself out of here," Donnie explains, rubbing the knuckles on top of my hand and soon he's pulling me with him towards the elevator and with that, we hit the bottom floor where Cayden is waiting for the two of us in his car. 

Mikey is lying in the back seat and Donnie crawls in with him while I sit in passenger and slowly sink into the leather and shut the door. I look at Cayden and he questions if we're ready and I tell him to hit it with a flat tone and he steps on the gas, taking off towards the south side of the city. 

During the trip, which takes a whole thirty minutes, I can't help but wanna sleep right here with the wind blowing in my face and the night sky rolling over my head. If rain and thunder weren't annoying enough, then the stars in the sky were the only thing to relax me at this very moment. 

"Where do you think Raphael went?" Donnie mumbled from the backseat as he catered to our little brother, holding his head in his lap near his bloating plastron. 

"Who gives a fuck where he went," I stated, curling my fist tightly and resting it on my head. 

"Mikey needs him," was all my mate muttered, finally shutting up. 

I couldn't bear another word about Raph. I didn't wanna be within ten feet of him if I could help it. He lost control right in front of me. But I did too. I lost complete control and nearly pulled a building down. We couldn't go back, we couldn't turn back now and getting my brother back, my true brother including my Godson was my only objective. 

As soon as we arrived on the south side, I was welcomed with the imagery of the vision Cayden basically handed off to me when we met. Her movements were so smooth, so pristine. It only reminded me that it was going to be me, the rest of us who will be training her and turning her into what I saw in my dreams. 

Now, when I looked at my mate, I only regretted hating such an idea. I rebelled against the thought of becoming a father, despite losing my own, I couldn't think about it. Especially without Donatello consulting with me, or even the rest of us first. But now, I don't rebel against the idea, I more likely praise it. 

"This is it," my friend announced, stopping the car in front of an old apartment building I assumed was his and before I could ask questions, he flipped the sun visor and down came a button. He pushed it and in front of the car, a garage door opened and quickly he drove in, leaving the night sky behind us. 

Once inside, I wasn't expecting the place to be so clean and organized. Here, I felt like I was back in the penthouse, but this was much, much more different. Once Cayden was parked and I got out, stepping onto what I assumed was marble floors, I got a good look at his car, considering this was by far the brightest room I think I've ever been in. He had more than three cars in this garage and who knows how big this place actually was. 

How rich was this guy to begin with?

From the back of the car, Donatello slides out just as Cayden comes around and takes our brother into his arms, carrying him towards a staircase that led deeper into the building and for even a second, I took a look at Donnie and we both shared an expression of confusion and followed our new friend down into an area that was stocked with cabinets, counters and a table in the middle that was long enough to fit Mikey on. 

"I know you two must be riddled with questions to ask me, but you must understand that I've been through both world wars and an epidemic. Since I was born I've had this nagging urge to help others instead of myself, so, for the last forty years, I've taken dozens of college classes for art and of course, medical," Cayden explains, moving around the room with a slow pace for once, "Does that about cover your curiosity, Leonardo?" 

I nod my head with a near smile, but I ignore the sudden burst of positivity and push it all aside as I leaned over my dead brother, fighting the built-up tears. 

"How much do you know?" Donnie questioned, taking a seat on the sofa by the door that slid to a close after we've walked through it. 

Cayden stopped after removing a few things from the cabinets, "What do you mean?"

Donnie sighs, retrieving his bo and putting it away "How skilled are you with this stuff, how do you plan on bringing our brother back?"

"We agreed that he'd come back as one of those things," I commented bitterly crossing my arms, and rolling my eyes. 

"Yeah, but, how exactly is that process done?" Donnie continues and just him talking about it infuriates me, but I no longer have a choice in this matter and if making my brother's life worse than it was before meant bringing him back, I'd do anything. 

I watched as Cayden began to clean the blood off of Mikey, including the stab wound the size of my own blades, "The process can be up to three days, or as far as transformation, maybe a week if that. But that depends on the person. For Raphael, it was only a day" 

"A day?" Donnie nearly gasped, "He transformed in a whole day?" 

Cayden nods, clearly surprised himself, "I expected it to take much, much longer with his size. The bigger the human, or even the muscle mass, it takes awhile. As I said, I expected it to take longer. With his size, and of course, his mutation. His blood would have fought against my venom," 

"His body wouldn't have been capable of it. As if it was denying the change, denying further mutation in his bloodstream," Donnie simply said, "But it was possible. So, how'd you do it?" 

Just as I watched Cayden tend to Mikey's wound the best he could, he shook his head, "It was a lot more complicated than I had originally thought. When I bit him, it was on the hand," he said, showing us both exactly where Raph was bitten and on the palm of his hand at the inner corner of his thumb was the location, "After it was done, he fainted from the pain. The venom, the feeling of it. It's more than just the word painful. It's more likely to be excruciating than anything or even beyond that, specifically for him. But after he had fallen on the ground, I knew that there was more that had to be done than just a single bite on the hand," 

"What about Mikey?" I finally asked, being done with fighting my curiosity. 

"Michelangelo will be easy," Cayden answers quickly, "He's a very small er, turtle. But with so much blood loss, I'm not sure if it'll go as planned," 

"Will he need more?" 

"Possibly. But human blood won't cut it," he replies looking at me.

"Then take mine!" I immediately said, holding both of my arms out but wincing from the loss of contact on my ribs. 

"Leo, you are in no condition to be donating blood," Donnie stepped in, taking my hand while looking at our little brother.

"And you're pregnant, so that's out of the question," Cayden states, stepping away from the table to throw away the gauzes covered in Mikey's darkening blood. Which only meant that he was fading further and further away from us. 

Donatello sighs and releases my hand, sounding tired, "Then we only have one option," 

I peered at him, almost with a glare, "No,"

"Leo," Donnie argues, blinking at me. 

"It's Raph's fault because he's dead, Donatello!" I came to a shout, making my mate look at me wide-eyed, "It's his fault because we lost someone else! Dad is dead, April is dead, Codey is missing and now our little brother is fucking dead, and it's all that idiot's fault!"

Donnie stared at me for the next few seconds, not saying a word, but just as I finished talking I noticed the tears in his eyes and I immediately regretted what I said. 

"Donnie, I--" I reached for him but he stepped away. 

"Don't!" he shouted, smacking my hand, "He hurt me too! Did you ever think about that? I'm carrying your egg! It's all of yours, and you didn't even bother asking if I was okay! If the egg was okay! Yes, dad is dead, April is gone, and Codey-- don't even talk to me about him, but you, and Mikey-- Raphael," he pauses, sobbing out a breath of air, "Get your shit together because now we have to get my best friend back!" 

I stand there, trying to swallow the lump in my throat while silently cursing to myself of my big mouth. I slowly glance at Cayden just as Donnie storms from the room as quickly as he could. 

"How fast can you get the venom in him?" I simply questioned, earning a surprised look from my new friend. 

"Right now. But, the procedure will be useless without Raphael's blood," he answers honestly with obvious care in eyes, "You need to let me look at those cuts," 

"I'm fine," I defended, shaking my head and ignoring the pain in my ribs again, "I need to find Raph," 

"Do you even know where he'll be?" 

I huffed, going for the exit, "I gotta pretty good idea," 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	20. ᵀʰᵉ ᴮʳᵉᵃᵏⁱⁿᵍ ᴼᶠ ᵀʰᵉ ᵁⁿᵇʳᵉᵃᵏᵃᵇˡᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael fights with his guilt and reunites with Leo during a struggle of his life and finds out that he may be the only source to help, heal and configure their dead baby brother.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴵˣ

ᵀʰᵉ ᴮʳᵉᵃᵏⁱⁿᵍ ᴼᶠ ᵀʰᵉ ᵁⁿᵇʳᵉᵃᵏᵃᵇˡᵉ

[ Raphael ]

I cursed the poison in my veins as I bit back the brittle, iron flavor in my mouth that I no longer wanted to taste that seemed to keep me alive. But most of all, what kept me the angriest. 

I traveled far, not really knowin' where much else I'd be going and then I found a way out of the madness called this world and kept my head low during the journey. I needed to escape someplace known, but unknown if you caught my drift. And in this city without managin' to cross the bridge, you had to choose one place or the other unless you're filthy fuckin' rich. 

Those ignorant pricks got to choose wherever they wanted to go when it came to vacations. I hated to admit it, but I envied humans even more now than I ever did in my whole life. I wished I could walk these streets and not have someone scream at me because of the way I looked. It was all fun and games at first, but now, I truly wanted normality. I wanted to end my road of destruction and pain that I left in my wake wherever I went. Especially tonight, it all came tumbling down right in front of me and it took exactly that to make me see who I've become. 

The son that was never favored but only hated. The brother who belittled and bullied. And the lover who abused and used. And now, the killer, the messy drinker who put the blade of a leader straight through the only living being who loved me for me. 

Looking around, I finally found what I was looking for and sure enough, everything was still here.

The Lair. 

It was in pieces, but things, very little things were still there. With the rock and rumble, I could still see through it all and imagine myself back to the way it used to be. Before I became what I am, and before I even admitted to myself, to even my brothers that I was gay and fully committed to what the humans called incest. Someone who was, and still is, so full of himself that he became blind to his own actions and words. I knew deep in my heart that Sensei would be ashamed of me. 

I created a clear path towards the staircase, that was missing a few steps of course, but I made it up anyway and went straight for Mikey's room. Once inside, I managed to find out that the place hadn't been completely destroyed. I then thought that whoever was hired to rig the bombs in this place did a pretty lousy job. 

The night April died, when Leo admitted his fault for the lair being destroyed, I couldn't respond with much but wanting to strangle him. But for what he did, he did it for us. For the possibility of us being exposed to the world. To a world that didn't welcome us, or even want us. 

At Mikey's old dresser, in the top drawer, I found a t-shirt with one of those silly characters he loved so much on the front. The smell of him, his scent, filled the room like smoke just as I pulled the fabric upwards to my snout and I took a small inhale, letting the scent remind me of my little brother, and how annoyin' and lovable he truly was. 

For the next hour, I explored the lair, letting memories fill my head of my first kiss with Mikey or just my first kiss in general. The talks with Donnie about how I'm feelin' when I couldn't go to Splinter about it. Then Leo. God, Leo. 

I sat down on the ground where the lounge used to be, remembering Leo's face when he practically begged for me to take him in the vilest ways that I refused time and time again, but fearless bein' fearless, he never backed down from a fight, or something he wanted. If he wanted it, he got it. 

Images flashed through my mind of hours earlier. The look on his face, the cuts, and bruises on his body from the glass and broken down furniture I threw at him and then, Mikey. He stopped me from-- 

Fuck. 

I held my head, rocking back and forth until an idea popped into my mind just as the roar of thunder crashed over my head. Those men, John's men. They carried guns with them. And here in the lair, a few dozen weapons were confiscated for Donnie's apparent research. Especially since late twenty-sixteen. They had to be here somewhere. Somewhere still in the lab. 

I rose to my feet, peering around the room until I found the door to my brother's old lab, but it was blocked by a few pieces of rubble from the top floor. I was quick to remove it, as I grabbed the edges of the concrete and threw it off to the side with a grunt, becoming very eager to get inside. I try to calm down and open the door like every other person would and walked in. I Immediately brought myself back to all of the times I've come in here, asking for Donatello's advice about what I should or shouldn't do. 

I could see it clear as day. 

How do you know when someone likes you?

The voices of our conversation echoed in the back of my mind, taking me back. 

Does he get that look in his eyes when he sees you?

My brother's tone was so rememberable. The genius knew exactly what I was talking about when I asked, every single time. He had an answer for everything and now, he carries my child in his stomach like it ain't nothin' and now he hates me. I tried to kill them. I tried to end their lives all because of how I felt. Because of how angry I always am. 

I put my fist through the wall to my right and yanked it all the way out and put it back through as hard as I could without flinching a muscle. The place was already a mess, and almost completely destroyed at this point, but it was still somethin' and somethin' wasn't just nothing in my eyes. 

What look?

I wanted to make something of this place again. 

You'll just know, Raph. Believe me. 

I shook my head, trying to rid the voices I kept hearing inside of me and moved on, looking around the room and next to Donnie's desk I saw a locker that he always kept specific things in that none of us were allowed to touch, or even see. But I had to get inside, I needed one of those guns. 

After pushing whatever out of my way I walked up to the secured doors, seeing that there wasn't a lock on it when there was. There used to be. I know there was. I knew for a fact that there was a lock on these doors and only Donnie had the keys. 

Unless...

"Looking for something?" 

I quickly turned, and in the corner of the room, I saw the face I never expected to see at a time like this. I stood up straight, cowering to him and lowering all of my defenses at once. 

"How the hell did ya get in here, Leo?" 

He came out of the darkness, revealing the disaster I clearly remember causing on his body, including the cut above his eye, "The roof," he answered, pointing at the ceiling where a large hole is.

"What'd you do with the guns?" 

"I tossed em," he simply said, crossing his arms over the other and peering up at me with obvious hatred. 

"Why?" I quickly questioned, anger already fueling my veins, "I fuckin' needed them!" 

"For what?" 

I scoffed, "Is that important?" 

Leo got closer, testing his limits with the smell of his own blood, "I know something that is important here," 

Tell him to step back, to walk away from you. Tell him that you don't wanna hurt anyone else and that you're done with these games you keep fooling yourself with. 

Looking down at my brother was almost shocking as it was intimidating for me. I couldn't bother fightin' it, or him anymore. I had no right. At least no rights at all from this day forward. 

"Where'd you put the guns, Leo?" I asked again with little hesitation. 

"I told you. I tossed them. And if I need to be any more specific than I am right now then allow me to be precise about it," he says, being soft about his words which always frustrated me. Leo's face turned inward, looking me dead up at me, "Mikey's dead," 

What? 

My expression fell, "He's dead?" 

Leo nodded, holding back whatever rage I could feel radiating from his body and he peered at me with sad but angry eyes. The ones I knew the most, "He died, and you're to blame, Raphael. And after you killed him, you leave us all alone to deal with it. You run off, like always, like you always do!" he shouts, shoving me backward, completely catching me off guard, "And now what? You come back here to remember the good old days when we were just coming out and discovering ourselves, where you break into our brother's lab to steal a gun, to what? To kill yourself?" 

I lowered my head and away from him, denying silently of everything he's currently throwing at me, "Leo--" 

"Were you, or were you not wanting to?" he questioned, shoving me again, but this time a little too hard and I backed up into one of the shelving units and knocked everything down. Leo kept pushing and pushing and for the third time, he shoved me against the brick walls. 

"Yes!" I screamed in his face, finally making him stand down, unable to believe I just said it. 

Leo's face straightened, "You know all those years as kids when we were growin' up, learning to fight and beat the so-called bad guys, I never thought that you'd be the first one to become more coward than dad was," 

"Shut up, Leo!" 

"Admit it, Raph," he smirked up at me, "Admit that you're a fucking pussy! So much of a pussy that you murdered your brother and left us to clean up the mess!" 

"Shut up!" I yelled, on the brink of tears just as my knees give and I fall with a thud, landing hard in front of my brother, "You don't think I don't know?"

"I don't know anything about you anymore!" he yells in return. 

"I don't even think I know myself anymore, Leo! And if Mikey's dead, then what am I even here for?" I simply ask, not being able to lift my head high enough to face my brother again. 

"Bringing him back," 

Leo's voice cracks when he says the words and I finally look up at him with wonder, "What do you mean, bring him back?"

"I'm not really into the idea. But Cayden explained to me and Donnie that he could be brought back with the help of your blood and believe me, finding you and asking you to come with me was the last thing I wanted. I hate the sight of you, and looking at you disgusts me, but if it means bringing our little brother back, I'll take my chances," he says, furthering my frown as I finally stood up, feeling a weight being lifted from my chest. 

"Donnie made ya come," I said conflicting myself to look at Leo who fought the same battle. 

"He more like said that we needed you," Leo exclaimed, walking away from me, looking around, "I didn't think I was right at first when Cayden asked me did I know where you'd be, but I was," 

"I didn't know where else to go," I inhaled, looking about just as my brother did while trying to push away any possible memory of this place. 

"Well. Now that we've finally caught up, we need to get back. Immediately," Leo demands, walking away from me, but before he reaches the door, I have him by the wrist and against the wall. He immediately gives me a horrid expression along with a warning but I blankly ignored it and gripped tighter around his wrist, "Raphael, I am in no mood to play your stupid little games. We need to get back, now!" 

"Look, I know. But can I have five more minutes to just talk--" 

"No, Raphael!" Leo yells, interrupting me, trying to yank his arm away from me while pushing against the base of my plastron with the other, "I need to get back to Donnie, and you need to--" 

I moved quickly towards my brother, capturing his lips in a small kiss, then another before pulling away to look at his face, which was ridden with confusion. I then noticed his cheeks reddening and I couldn't help but feel proud for finally turning my brother speechless. Leo's hand caressed my cheek, moving down, fingers dragging over my throat, making me question the tension in the air because I knew deep down that he too was just fighting the temptations. 

"I need ya to know how sorry I am," I muttered, resting my forehead against his. Letting our eyes drop down a level to where it's less anger and more focused vision from this point forward. My goal was to get his guard down, to finally get him to listen because I was done fighting with him. 

"Raph," Leo breathed, shutting his eyes to avoid me, "We can't do this. Not now,"

"Do you understand how sorry I am?" I spat at him, calming myself before I spoke again, "Do you understand how much I've realized? How much of a foolish idiot I've become since this curse I've been so helplessly blessed with!"

Leo continues to struggle in my grip and I slam his hand into the wall, keeping him there, "If you're so damn sorry then prove it by saving our brother!" 

"I don't want him to be like me, to be what I am!" 

My brother finally looked up at me, focusing his eyes and finally calming down, "I don't want it either, because there's a chance he can become something much worse without your blood. But if it means saving him, and bringing him back, then I'll risk it all. Because I'm tired of losing people I love," he says, furrowing his brow bones at me, "Including you!"

"Oh, Leo," I sighed heavily sliding my fingers between his and holding them tight, "I'm here," 

"You weren't!" Leo answers quietly while knotting his digits with mine before leaning forward, "You weren't you. You weren't my brother, my Raph," 

"I'm done not bein' who you or the others want me to be. I'm tired of livin' that life, Leo. After all these years, I can finally say that you were right. It's about time I grew up," 

Our eyes meet and only for a second, I saw how happy he was when I said what I said. I saw the tears, the pain I've obviously caused him. Including the rest of us. I couldn't bear it any longer. Too much guilt was hangin' over my head and after what I did, I couldn't turn back, but only go forward to what really needed to be done for me. For the only people that I have left willing to accept who I truly am in my new form. Mutant or not. 

I brushed my snout against my brothers, letting his lips touch mine and with him giving in with full permission, he kissed me, allowing the two of us to throw every inch of tension, pressure, and power out the window. Leo got out of my grip and threw his arms around my neck, molding into my touch as if he's becoming completely submissive, which came as a shock. Especially right now. 

"We need to get goin' Leo," I interrupted, feeling the strength in my body rising for some reason. 

"A little longer," he said, kneading his fingers into the back of my neck, "Like, this, please." 

I cursed inside my head for starting something so dangerous. I began to remember the words of my master, though I wouldn't call him that to his face. But, it would be the correct term I guessed. He told me the risks of sexual energy as an immortal. You could kill your lover, depending on the form, of course. I thought of it for only a second then but now, I'm actually considering it with how I'm feelin' right about now. 

I rested my hand on the brick wall above Leo's shoulder, fighting the urge as we kissed again, lighting a flame within me that I needed to put out. I didn't wanna risk hurting anyone else. My brothers may have been mutants, and to others, we were untouchable, unkillable and very unlikely to get injured. But hurting each other was a bigger risk than a nuke fallin' on our heads. Alone, we were the only things that could truly hurt one another.

Leo dragged his fingers down my throat and over my chest as I licked his tongue, earning a small moan from my brother's lips, making him finally pull away and look up at me with greed. 

I could see that he wanted it. Wanted me. In that way. For it to be in that way, I knew it had been a very long time for both of us, together. I wanted it just as badly as he did because doin' it with Leo was somethin' else. It was somethin' I couldn't really explain by itself. I could say the same for the rest of my brothers, and they knew this too. They felt the same as I did when it came to mating or just kinky fuckery in general. With Leo, there was spice. Something fierce and troubled. It was a force that just begged to be reckoned with. Donnie was sweet, but he loved control. It was obvious. But as soon as he has exactly what he wants, he doesn't need it. Then there was-- Mikey. 

Raphie. 

His innocent voice played in my mind. I saw his smile that caused the dimples and creases on his cheeks to appear. How light and feathery his laugh was. Then sex-- Jesus. 

But most importantly his heart. Mikey's heart was the only thing that mattered most to me about him. It was pure, and he was smart while no one else knew it. And, not even until now, did I know it. And because of me, that heart wasn't beating and only I could help fix it. Repair it. 

Resurrect it. 

I saw a twinkle in Leo's eyes as I thought this and I took his hand in mine, reminding myself that now, everything would maybe be okay as long as I can find a way to control myself. 

"Let's get back. I have a brother to save," 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	21. ᴰᵉᵐᵒⁿ ᴺᵒʳ ᴬⁿᵍᵉˡ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the following up from Chapter Nineteen, Raph and Leo return and the process of saving Mikey begins with not only facts but a truce into a brand new brotherhood.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣ

ᴰᵉᵐᵒⁿ ᴺᵒʳ ᴬⁿᵍᵉˡ

[ Donatello ]

"Won't you eat something?" 

"No," I answered, holding my hand over my stomach, trying to grow some sort of connection with my own fetus that I nearly craved, "I'm not hungry" 

"You need to eat. Plus, people love my cooking" Cayden brags, placing a plate down in front of me, which was filled with what looked like pasta and some other things that counted as a salad. 

"People?" I questioned glancing up at him, "Do you have other friends?"

"Well," he pauses, draining a cup of tea, "Not exactly but I do have a past of culinary experience. Plus, my mother loved to cook and play music, so. Whatever she learned, whatever she could do, she taught me," 

I looked back down at the plate and leaned forward, finally taking my hand off of my stomach to grab the spoon, "Can you eat this stuff?" I ask, taking a small bite and to my surprise, it was actually pretty good. 

Cayden narrowed at me with amusement, "Of course. The only thing I don't do is digest as you or other humans do," 

"What else can you do?"

"Why don't we discuss what you, can do, Donatello?" he asks, leaning on both elbows over the marble countertop. 

I lowered the spoon, swallowing from my recent bite, "Me?" I then paused, "There's not much to know about me," 

My friend laughs, "What do you mean? There's plenty to know about you. From what I've heard and seen, you are the smartest of your brothers and possibly the wisest," 

"Wise?" I repeat, "Me, wise. That's uh, that was usually Mike's department. He learned quicker than any of us during training and not either of us knew he did until later. Until it was too late,"

After the words left my mouth, silence sat on top of my shoulders like a cloak. I already could feel the sting in my eyes and I lowered my head, suddenly losing my appetite. 

Cayden immediately noticed the change and cleared his throat, "Hey- hey," he says, planting a hand on my shoulder, "I'm really sorry, Donnie. I shouldn't have said anything" 

I shook my head, moving out of my seat and away from him, "Don't. I'm just--" 

"In shock,"

At the sound of the booming voice entering the room, I quickly turned my head towards it and saw both my brothers standing there, drenched from the rain.

My heart sank at the sight of Raphael and the dark look in his eyes only told me stories I couldn't describe right this second. I took a small step away from the table and caught myself on the china cabinet. Right then, Leo moved towards me but I held my hand up to stop him. 

"I did as you said, Donatello," my mate confirms with soft eyes. 

"Nice to see you, Raphael," Cayden greeted, earning a stretched look from my sibling who then turned his sights back on me from across the room. 

"I need to see him," Raph says quietly, breaking the awakening silence filling the room like smoke. 

"I-I don't think that's a good idea," 

"I wanna see him, Donnie," Raph demands, stepping forward, making it obvious of his clenched fists. 

My brother didn't have his mask on. Maybe it was lost, destroyed or worse. I didn't really care right now. I didn't wanna know what he's been up to since--

"Let's take the time to get comfortable. Would either of you like some tea or food?" Cayden offers, taking two extra cups from the cabinet.

"No, no, thank you," Leo answers, sitting in my chair at the table while covering his ribs with the palm of his hand. 

He's still injured. 

How could I forget? 

"Leonardo, when you are ready I want you to come and see me in the study upstairs so I can tend to those wounds, and perhaps ease the pain with your bones," Cayden says going for the door, but pauses just before he leaves, "And one more thing-- do not break my house, please," 

As our friend disappears, I finally gain enough courage to look at my older brother and the stare he was still giving me sent chills down my spine, "Why do you need to see him, right now?" 

"Leo explained I could fix him," 

"Leo told correctly. There's a without the choice, possibility that your blood and Cayden's venom could return life to him. But not in the way we would attend," I explain, leaning on the cabinet behind me. 

"He would be like me," Raph mutters, causing images to cross my mind that I'd rather avoid. 

"We don't want that. But it's our only choice," Leo exclaims, "I'd rather him be with us again as someone we don't even know than dead,"

My older brother catches my eyes again and exhales through his nose, "I've already spoken to Leo about what happened. But now that I'm in front of you, Don, I can't tell ya how sorry I am. And for the next week, or even years, I can already see that I am goin' to have to say that a lot. And for once, I don't really care. I'm lettin' the ego you always point out between me and Leo go. I'm tired of hidin' in the shadows. I'm tired of bein' someone I'm not and now, now I've realized what I am. What I'm capable of doin' and being around you. And this time, ya beat my ass until I could see straight. And I just wanna thank you for allowin' me to do this," 

I couldn't bear to rip my eyes away from him and once again, the sting in my eyes returned and this time I let the tears fall, "Follow me," was all I could say before going down the stairs from the kitchen to the basement. 

Raph was behind me, and the thought alone frightened me, but I couldn't help but have a sudden need to touch him. To let him know everything is okay and will be okay but I'm too bitter, too angry to even imagine that happening right now--

As soon as we got to the bottom of the stairs, my brother takes ahold of my hand, completely catching me off guard and holding it up to his cheek, forcing me to caress it and during this, I wanted to hit him, but I couldn't. 

"I want to know that you forgive me before I do anything further," Raph says, squeezing my hand against his cheek, "I won't beg but if I need to, I will,"

The darkness was swallowing me and brother's shadows as he forced me to caress him. From the lighting, I could only see half of his face, and for even a second, he looked good under all of this. His eyes weren't as evil as I remember. Instead, they were sad and completely broken in pools of green and yellow right in front of me. 

My tears from before dried on my cheekbones and I looked away from my brother for only a moment, "Things have to change, Raphael,"

"And they will," he breathes, "You have my word, Donnie, I swear to you,"

I bring his head closer to mine until our foreheads touch, and now, I could feel and smell so closely to his musk that my knees nearly buckle from underneath me, "I missed you so much," 

I felt a hand on my hip, then at my stomach and I knew my brother was feeling around for the baby, "Is she okay?" he questions, obviously hesitating with his words and I nod at him, putting my own hand over his. 

"From what I can tell, she is. The worst that could happen would be the egg cracking and I so far know nothing about its progress, but she's fine," I reassure, nodding my head again. 

"I was worried sick about her. I saw so many things in my head, Donatello," he sighs, continuing to feel of my stomach, making my face heat up, "I thought I--"

"Raph," I say letting my voice tremble with stress, "It's all fine, I'm fine, and Leo, he's just-- I don't even know and now, Mike-" 

Raphael cut me off with a kiss on the lips which caused a small whimper to escape my own, and with hesitance, I kiss back, sharing the same passionate greed behind my very tongue. I wanted to kill him, claw him or push him away. One of the others, but I couldn't. Having him back felt just as good as it was before and I never wanted him to leave again. I didn't want anyone to leave me again. 

I needed my Mikey. My Raph and my mate, Leo to all be one again. We needed each other to be as one or else Venus would be born wrongfully and less protected. She needed all four of us as one heart and one heart alone. 

[ Raphael ]

Don tasted like mint with a teaspoon of blood and copper on his tongue, and when I finally released his hand and backed away from his lips, his face was flushed and the heat rolling off his body only told me something I needed to avoid. I had bigger issues, and frankly more important ones to think about and to deal with. Though deep down inside, I wanted my brother just as much as he was wanting me right now. I knew they both did. 

"Take me to him, Donnie,"

My brother stared up at me with fear in his eyes but walked away allowing me to follow him into a lower level and into another room that smelled of rubbing alcohol and cleaning chemicals. 

In the middle of the room, a long metal table was displayed between a bunch of cabinets and other storage units, and on the table, I saw my worst nightmare right in front of me. 

I felt my legs go numb, and my fingers began to tingle and whatever was left of my heart, had shattered into tiny little pieces. Donnie walked ahead of me, being on the other side of the table, "Leo didn't want me to, but I cleaned him up the best I could. And the bleeding-- it was just too much. I'm surprised it stopped when it did. I guess even us mutates aren't as immortal as we thought," 

Staring at my little brother's body made me wanna crawl into a hole and die. I didn't feel worthy enough to even be standing here with him or to be in the presence of my other brothers. 

Michelangelo was pale, and the blue around his fingertips, eye sockets and mouth made me wanna break down. I couldn't believe what I was seein' and the reality of it, and me knowin' it was actually real broke me further than I thought possible. The dream I had before Sensei passed away became a true nightmare displayed in front of me. The blood that was stained on his mask, the wounds. 

"Raph?" 

I blinked, swallowing the huge lump in my throat and I broke, looking at my brother, "I-I'm sorry. I'm just havin' a hard time, lookin' at him like that," 

"Yeah. Try seeing him go, and carry him, tend to his wounds while he isn't even there. But I'd rather not think about how he got this way or why it happened in the first place. Mikey wanted to save Leo from you. He told me he was tired of losing people. And when he said that, he meant it," Donnie says, cleaning the remaining blood from my little brother's hands. 

I close my eyes, trying to hold back the emotional bile in my throat, "Can you give me a minute alone with him?" 

Donnie and I share a look for a whole five seconds and then he nods, "I need to check on Leo anyway-- and when Cayden gets done tending to Leo's wounds, I'll let him know when you're ready to prepare," 

"For what?" I quickly ask, unable to hold back my frustration. 

Donnie lowers his head, walking for the door, "The mutation," 

Once he's gone, I release a breath of air I didn't know I was holding-- though now, I didn't have the need to breathe or worry about my heart pounding too quickly after a workout. I felt more human than mutant right now. I felt fear and more heartache than I could explain. 

I moved closer to Mikey's body and looked down at his hand, attempting to touch his fingers and hold it in mine. I curled my own fingers and took his hand in mine, feeling how cold his skin was, when before, it was always warm and comforting like summer heat. 

His warm-blooded days were over with. 

My eyes moved to his wound, which was wrapped and covered with bandages that were badly stained with his blood. The smell made me sick, and for once my throat didn't burn at the intrusion. I didn't crave the kill or the prey bowing at its last fight of mercy for me. 

I then looked at his face, and I knew then that he suffered. He looked peaceful but in pain. And all because of me, I knew why he felt and looked this way. He had a plot and a plan all set up the next time I snapped and when it happened, it all fell through exactly the way he wanted it to and he jumped the gun and sacrificed his life for one of us to not only prove a point but to put the word inside of me to know that he, life or death, would never let anyone hurt his family. 

"I'm so sorry, Mikey," I whispered, squeezing his hand in mine as droplets fall from my eyes and into the palm of his hand, staining his pale, olive skin, "I hope you'll be able to forgive me when we see each other again," 

I stand over my little brother and lean all the way down until I'm inches from his face and I press a kiss to the middle of his forehead, "I'll make it better, I'll make it all go away," 

"Raphael," 

I slowly shut my eyes, knowing the voice from anywhere, "I told Donatello to give me a minute," 

"Yeah, I know you did. But I don't care what you want right now," Cayden says, walking around the table as I avoid his eyes, "Leo had told me about what happened in your old home,"

I narrow at my maker and stand up straight, "What about it?"

"You know suicide isn't possible for either one of us, Raphael. Why on earth would you even attempt it?" he snaps, crossing his arms over his chest. 

"I didn't attempt it! I just-- I thought about doin' it! I didn't wanna live anymore. I didn't even know Mikey was dead! I didn't know what I did, was that bad!" I retorted with a shout of my own, refusing the anger already building deep inside of me. 

"You need to come to grips with yourself, and your mind, Raphael. I don't need your brother coming to me and telling me these things about you again. Yes, you did what you did. But now, now you can make up for it. I'd give anything to have a second chance as you do. I've always wanted to fix what I did and have done to many-- including you and your family. So far, you've been one of my best creations, and now, I'd really like it if you help me undo something to heal many broken hearts," he says, staring at me with serious eyes and I shake my head, unable to hold back the tears. 

"You swear it'll work?" I questioned, allowing my voice to shake with emotion as I released Mikey's hand, putting it back where it was. 

"With your blood, it will," he confirms, as I look down at my little brother, nodding my head. 

"Whatever it takes, Cade," 

After the words were spoken from my mouth, my friend was gone, leaving me alone with my mate only to return wearing a pair of white rubber gloves, and a silver platter with a few things on top. I could see three different needles and other generic things that allowed you to transfer blood, of course. 

Not long after Cade returned, my brothers entered the room, looking a little better than before. Leo no longer smelt of blood and was covered in bandages. Donnie helped himself to whatever was in the cabinets and pulled out what I knew was called a banana bag in some places. 

"To complete the process, we're gonna need a few vials of your blood. It won't take long and then we'll inject my venom," Cade says, making me hold my arm out before cleaning a certain area with an alcohol wipe, and without a warning, he sticks a needle in one of my veins with a tube attached to it and not even a second later, I saw the familiar dark red substance pass in through the tube and into the bag Donnie got out of the cabinet. 

"I thought ya said, vials?" I comment, looking at Cade. 

"This bag will equivalent to how much blood Michelangelo will need. I already have my own vials prepared. I usually am always prepared for something like this. You four aren't the first I've helped during times like these," he says, leaving the needle in my arm as I remain still. 

I watch as Donatello assists Cade with the vials and another needle that goes into Mikey's arm, which begins to transfer the blood from the bag into his body and eventually the needle in my own is removed and replaced with a bandaid, that I didn't necessarily need. 

"How long will this take?" Leo questions from the corner of the room, obviously not wanting to be apart of the current activity. Which I couldn't blame him for. If I had a choice in the matter, I wouldn't be apart of it either. 

"Michelangelo's body will need a few days, at least. Perhaps, three. Or maybe a week. I'm never sure. He is a mutant turtle with many different organs, and of course, blood type. The point of me needing Raphael's blood to complete the process was because, with Michelangelo's type, I've tested his blood, and my venom. He fights it. Just like Raphael's did. His cells denied further mutation," Cade answers, watching the blood drain from the bag and disappear into Mikey. 

Donnie's eyes wander to mine and once again, we share another look of mysteries, "I can only imagine what Raph went through," he says, surprising me. 

Cade sighs, catching my attention again, "His case was much, much serious, and it took more than a week. On top of that, he was still changing while awake, so, I had to keep a very close eye on him," 

"Didn't seem to keep an eye on him too much, considering he killed three men and left a blood trail which led us straight to him," Leo grins from the corner of the room and I tilt my head at him, and his smile widened. 

"Let's just focus on Mikey here," I say turning my eyes back to my little brother, watching Cade do his thing with other needles and whatnot. 

In the syringes he was using was a grey copper color, and one by one, he put them in Mikey. 

After ten minutes of working around the clock, Cayden announced that the procedure was finished, and now all we had to do was wait. 

He reassured us that our brother would be fine. That he would return to us soon. That we needed to be prepared for anything to happen. And that there was a possibility that if and when my little brother woke up, that he wouldn't remember us. That he would possibly attack us, or want to escape immediately. He would be just as bloodthirsty as me. 

A newborn.

A part of me was fully prepared and the other was dreading the day when he opens his eyes because the baby blues I knew of him, would no longer exist until his thirst was under control. 

The three of us gathered around Mikey on the table, where I removed his mask. Leo did his gear, and Donnie his weapons. I held the fabric in my hands, gripping it tight enough to shred it, but I couldn't. I wanted to forbid myself to help bring my little brother back with a curse that he would never rid of. But bringing him back in one, big dangerous piece, was the only thing I cared about now. 

I couldn't wait to make it up to him. 

I couldn't wait to meet the Mikey we all feared most. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally here! 
> 
> I really hope you enjoy and hopefully you don't cry like I did while trying to finish this one up. But hey that's what emotional drama is meant to be about!
> 
> Cowabunga! 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	22. ᴳʳᵒʷⁱⁿᵍ ᴾᵃⁱⁿˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raphael continues to grieve over the death and sudden change in his life while he and Leo make amends over a glass of bourbon which leads to shattered glass and a reminder of a broken heart including the conversation of their nephew, Codey and how to find him again.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣ|

ᴳʳᵒʷⁱⁿᵍ ᴾᵃⁱⁿˢ

[ Leonardo ]

. . . Forty-Eight Hours Later . . .

Another bed, another strange place that I am waking up in. The mattress though was comfortable and that was something I could at least give Cade for letting us crash here with him after we ruined John's penthouse. Just like we ruin everything else. 

My ribs remained a little sore and the bruises were disappearing finally and for once I didn't feel all that weak, even though It's only been a few days since the accident. 

Though, as the days went on, Donatello seemed to be getting weaker and weaker. He was able to walk with the help of his bo and usually snapped at those who tried helping him. But I already knew that he would crash before the baby was born. He was fighting it every day and even realizing that his body may or may not be compatible with the fetus. None of us knew anything for sure, and it terrified me. The thought of losing Donatello was something unexplainable and it put me in the situation of Raph and Mikey. 

I could only imagine how he must feel for losing his mate. 

After a shower, I go into the basement, where I find my brother sitting in the same spot as yesterday. He hasn't left Michelangelo's side since we injected him with Cade's venom or hasn't spoken to either of us. Like he's protecting Mikey's body or maybe waiting for him to leap up like a zombie. 

"Have you slept?" 

Raph didn't move as I spoke and walked a little closer, "No. I don't really need ta anymore. Even though that asshole upstairs said I did," 

"You should rest. He'll be fine, it just takes a while," 

"I have nothin' better to do, Leo," he mumbles, refusing to look at me as I'm standing on the opposite side of the table. 

"You kinda do. I don't wanna argue but you gotta take care of yourself too, Raphael. Just because you're immortal, that doesn't mean you don't have needs. Like bathing-- you smell like death!" I confront, waving my hand in the air and I earn a glare from him. 

"Screw you," he growls, finally standing up from the chair by the table and walking upstairs, where I follow him proudly. 

"I'm sure you wanna," I mutter, rolling my eyes, not realizing that my brother stopped walking up the stairs until I run into him and nearly falling backward and he catches me by the arm. 

"If you keep makin' comments like that then I might. And that's not a threat, Leo. It's a promise," he says, releasing my arm and climbing the stairs, leaving me a little stunned but then I shook it off, and followed him up the stairs and into the kitchen. 

"Donatello plans to do a check-up on the egg here soon, are you gonna be there?" I ask my brother, trying to get his mind off of whatever was in that big head of his. 

"How does he plan on checking it?" he finally asks, as I sit two glasses on the table, debating on water, juice or perhaps alcohol. 

"Apparently with his mind. You haven't noticed how bad he's getting- have you?" I questioned, finding a bottle of bourbon in the cabinet which forced me to grow hesitant but I came back to the table anyway, figuring that both of us needed at least a bit of relief from all the stress going on. 

"Don?" Raph continues, watching the liquid pour into the crystal glass in front of him, "I have-- I just try to ignore my vision as much as possible. I've seen him die too, you know?"

I stop pouring and pause a moment and then I resume on my own glass, pouring the equal amount and I sit down, letting the creaky noises from the chair beneath me disturb my thoughts and I shook my head, forcing the image from my mind, "I'm sure you've seen us all die," 

My brother reached forward and curled his fingers around the glass, analyzing it with a quirk of his lips, "What's with the bourbon?" he asks, bringing the rim of the glass to his lips, inhaling the scent then meeting my eyes with the darkest gaze I think I've ever seen, "I thought ya didn't drink, Leo," Raph finishes while downing the alcohol with a single tilt of his head and he delicately places the glass back on the table, sliding it forward with his finger.

I swallowed the growing lump in my throat and shrugged, "It might take the edge off," says, still not touching my own glass. 

"That is the point of bein' drunk, ain't it?" he replies, dawning the realization over my head. 

My mind went back to that time in lair when we got drunk for the first time. We were all over each other like a bunch of wild teenagers in heat. Now, times like that are just memories. It made a frown appear on my face, which my brother soon noticed. 

"I guess so," I finally replied, looking inside my glass, swirling the liquid around, debating whether to actually drink it or not. 

"What's the matter now?"

Oh. 

"Nothing I was just thinking about things," I answer, still playing with my drink. 

"You gonna drink that, or?" 

My eyes flick up in his direction, "Oh, um, no. Sorry," I quickly say before sliding my glass over to him. 

He chugged it down within seconds and I slowly stood up, taking the empty glasses with me over to the sink just as I heard Raph's chair scoot back, "Gimme another,"

I shake my head, washing the glasses out with warm water before putting them away and back in the cabinet, "No, two alone was enough, Raphael," I simply replied while neatly folding the dishtowel and putting it on the countertop and when I turned around, my brother was so close I wanted to jump out of my skin. 

"I said pour me another, Leo," he demanded, staring down at me with a simple expression. 

"I hope you two aren't fighting again," mumbled the voice of my mate who just saved my ass.

Raph slowly turned his head enough to look over his shoulder at Donatello and blew out a hot breath of air through his nose, "Fearless won't let me drink," he says, crossing his arms over his broad chest. 

"He is right to not let you. We need a clear mind right now, and I'd rather have you both sane enough to realize that I'm six months into pregnancy and that the egg is healthy-- especially after the fight. It has seemed that when I use my Chi, the protection over my own body gets stronger, including the blood flowing in my veins," Donnie speaks, crossing the room to place a hand on the counter next to me and he looks between us with bright eyes. 

Neither of us was wearing our masks. Which felt unusual for me, but the others, I'm sure they were glad. It wasn't exactly necessary for us to wear them in the first place. This was just another sanctuary under the protection of two of the most dangerous demons on the planet and for once, I felt eternally safe without my gear, hidden identity or my blades. 

"Did Cade already check you?" I questioned calmly to Donnie who nodded his head. 

"I would have waited. But I just let you sleep. And Raph, I know you care for the egg-- but right now, I think you just need some time to recover. Especially since Mikey's injections. Just please, no drinking-- at least, no more than a glass," he begs, watching my older brother's face. 

Raph shrugged his shoulders, "Six months, huh?" 

I nearly cracked a smile, "And healthy? Sheesh, I kinda wish you guys could have seen that vision I saw. I at least know that she's gonna be one helluva fighter,"

"I sorta already saw it," Raph confessed, "Like, ages ago. I've seen the fetus kill Donnie before and after birth, and I've seen her when she's quite old and becoming as professional as either of us combined," 

"I'd rather not know about me dying" Don sighed, leaning on the counter, relaxing his torso as I spotted his rounding stomach, which suited him in the strangest and beautiful ways. 

I reached out, caressing Donatello's stomach and feeling around for any kicks and soon little drum beat sized thumps are felt at the palm of my hand and I nearly gasp from the contact, thinking I would never get an actual reaction. Donnie puts his hand over mine, smiling at me. 

"She's comfortable," muttered Raph, who watched my hand with intent eyes.

"Comfortable?" Donnie questioned, "You can hear her?"

Our brother nods as Cade enters the room, carrying a metal tray and then he places it on the table that was filled with bowls and silverware, "All immortals seem to share the same abilities when it comes to children. I can only imagine if Raphael and Mike would to have a child. It'd be against major rules," 

The three of us turn to look at him like he said something that only the pope would have shared and I gawked at him, "Major rules?" 

Cayden straightened his spine and adjusted his glasses, "By the word of the demon gods, immortal children were always forbidden," 

"Why?" Donnie questioned, sitting at the dining table. 

"Unstoppable," Raph interrupts, "This is what I feared about Donatello, Cade. Can this happen to him?" 

Cade glances at Donnie then catches my eye, "The egg isn't mutated any further than it already is if that's what you mean. Donatello was impregnated months prior to Raph's changes and um, of course, when you two had sex," 

"At least that's a relief," I breathed, running my hand over the back of my neck. 

"Immortal children are forever moving-- but in the worst ways. I've been brushin' up on my reading or at least, what ya showed me. It's not the type of thing you wanna be messin' around with," Raph says, lowering his stances to the floor where he hung his head low. 

"When did you start reading?" Donnie commented before I could even ask him myself. 

"I told him to brush up on his new heritage. It's better that he knows the ups and downs, and the risks of other immortals that he may or may not meet in the future. The books I've written teaches restraint, and a much more peaceful nature for the crave of human blood," Cayden explains, continuing on, "Whenever Michelangelo completes his mutation, he will need to study them immediately. It won't be easy and it definitely won't be like all the other newborns I've seen. Even fledglings learned quickly-- but with Michelangelo's temper that I know deep down that he has, including his attention span that will force him to focus on but one thing and it's the one thing he'll want most,"

"We can help him," I said, looking at Cade with concern in my eyes then at Raph who seemed more down now that we were discussing the topic of our undead little brother, "Right?"

Cayden balanced himself on the surface of the hard washed wooden table and looked at me, speaking honestly- "I can't give you an exact answer, Leonardo. It won't be easy. But as long as Raphael plans to stick around, I think we'll have enough muscle on our backs to last until he gains control over himself,"

I looked at my red-banded brother, letting my eyes scan his expression from the side, "I don't think he'll be doing that anytime soon," 

"I'm done talking about, Mikey!" Raph erupted, slamming his fist on the dining table where Cayden quickly removed his hands as the table cracked and fell apart with a loud crash. The bowls and plates hit the ground, shattering into pieces while the silverware clanks loudly on the floor.

Donnie scrambled from the wooden chair, quickly moving away from the mess now scattered across the floor as each one of us shared the same look while staring at Raph who looked to be fuming out of anger. I heard Cade release a large and loud sigh as he crossed his arms, "Didn't I tell you to not break my house?"

"I'm tired of hearin' about him! We don't even know what he's gonna be like, we don't know if he's gonna be dangerous! Who's to say he will be? Not every fuckin' vampire will be like me, or you!" he points at Cade, earning a glare from him, "I trust in Mikey that when he wakes up, he'll still be my Mikey!" 

The look in Raph's eyes was pure emotion and at this point, I could see his tears. I knew then that it was time to finally shut up about his mate. About his death, and his changes. It needed to stop and In some messed up way-- I could mentally feel his own heart losing a piece each time Mike was brought up. 

"Look," Cade said, holding his hands up, "Why don't I get this mess cleaned up, which will only take a few seconds and everyone can just relax a bit?" 

"Actually-" Donnie said, "We might need your help with something else," 

Our friend moved around the room at lightning speed, cleaning up the broken glass and removing the table from the middle of the room and then, he was done. I was pleased with his supernatural speed. I had fought things in the past that could do things similar to him, but not like this. I remember learning to move with their speed as well as my own which I quickly grew used to. It was one of the most difficult tasks to learn as a ninja. 

Cayden while drying his hands and looks to Donnie with a delayed expression, "What's wrong now?" 

"We actually need to find someone. He's a rich man," Donnie says, twiddling with his fingers nervously and I already knew who he was talking about. 

"John Godi?" 

"We still have to find Codey" I spoke up, coming to the realization that neither of us has thought about him since the fight. 

"The child. Right," Cade remarks, placing his hands on his broad hips which were always covered in some sort of black clothing. 

"I've been trying to call him. But my calls keep getting sent to voicemail. Like his phone is off. I've tried to get a direct signal to his cell, but everything ends up completely off the grid like he doesn't even exist," Donnie says, beginning to worry me, "I feel like he'd be the only one to know where Jameson took Codey and why," 

"The child was in a dangerous home. No, it wasn't right for him to take him as he did. But I'm hoping that each of you was at least the smallest bit happy that he wasn't there when the fight went down. He could have gotten hurt and nobody wants that," Cade says, making me look down at the ground. 

"What if he's dead?" Raph mumbled off, as I snapped my head towards him. 

"Codey isn't dead!" I defended, raising my voice. 

"Not Codey-- John," Raph says, causing me to lower my guard altogether, "He couldn't have just disappeared in thin fuckin' air. He's not answerin' his phone, and his voice mail is disconnected by the sounds of it and there is no news on him," 

"How would you know?" I asked bitterly not understanding when Raphael became the brains of the group. 

He cut his eyes at me from the side, obviously angered by my comment but for once he stops and looks away from me, saving the rest of the room an argument I'd actually rather not get into. I had to keep reminding myself that Raph was still Raph, but not fully. He could snap my neck if he wanted and wouldn't think anything of it until later. I didn't wanna fear my brother because of this. But knowing it, I couldn't help myself but enjoy the thrill. The fear and maybe the adrenaline of testing his limits with anger. He was so fascinating and just now, I understood Don's amazement with such things. I used to think they were so childish and such a waste of time. I wanted to be professional at what I do and think less of my wants and more of the needed protection for my family and making my father-- my Sensei proud. 

Now, that meant nothing to me. 

"We need to find Codey before Mikey wakes up," Donnie demanded, interrupting my thoughts. 

"Then it's settled, we go to his fuckin' house. He'll answer to us one way or another. And if not to you--" Raph says, meeting my eyes as his own was no longer green, "Me," 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	23. ᴰᵉᵃᵈᵐᵃⁿ ᵀᵉˡˡ ᴺᵒ ᵀᵃˡᵉˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michelangelo faces the truth of his return, and someone special shows him the way.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

ᶜʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣ||

ᴰᵉᵃᵈᵐᵃⁿ ᵀᵉˡˡ ᴺᵒ ᵀᵃˡᵉˢ

[ Michelangelo ]

The air was clear and crisp. No rain or snow. All sunshine and the perfect amount of wind to keep you whipped into shape during this perfect so-called moment. 

I could feel grass beneath my body and once I got the chance, I curled my fingers inwards and gripped the dull, earthy land between the digits of my knuckles, being unable to rip anything out of the ground, as if it was impossible. 

Where was I?

I slowly peeled my eyes open, fluttering at the sight of the cloudy blue sky above me and for even a second, I couldn't put the pieces together of whether this was real or not. But at this point, I didn't really care. If I was sleeping then maybe I didn't wanna wake up yet. If I was dreaming then maybe my brothers wouldn't wake--

My eyes popped open and I quickly threw myself up, covering the front of my chest with the palm of my hand, searching and feeling for any wounds and I came to realize that there was nothing there. My gear, my clothes. I reached up, and my mask was gone. I was nude in the middle of an endless field of grass and buttercups. 

I was stabbed. 

"Leo?" I glanced around, twisting my neck over my shoulder and I saw nothing but the same crap, "Donnie!" 

I got to my feet, scrambling a little and feeling a bit out of wack. I felt like I was walking on air. Like nothing was wrong or would be ever again. I looked at my hands, moving my fingers again and every scar I ever knew to having was gone. Even my tattoos were gone. 

Images flashed in my mind as I stumbled forward, falling on my knees, I smacked into the grass, catching myself on the strength of my hands, not feeling any sort of pain. I was then breathing heavily and feeling awkwardly panicky. 

"Michelangelo," 

I twisted again, looking around, unable to figure out where the hell I was until I saw--

My spine straightened and the color in my face had probably drained, "Sensei?" 

Across the meadow, in the mix of this mess, I saw my father. He looked younger, and the robe he was wearing was spotted with beautiful flower patterns that seemed to fit his personality in all the right ways. 

"Come closer, my son," he says, and I obey with instinct, though I'm hesitant at first.

I peer down at my feet as I'm moving over the flowers, watching where I step, "Master Splinter, what is this?" I questioned so quietly I immediately just figured he couldn't hear me. 

Once I got close enough, the smile on his face was almost heartwarming for me, let alone confusing as he reached up to me, caressing my forearm, showing that this was as real as all the other things I've been experienced, "Do not be frightened," he reassures, releasing the grip on my arm and lowering it to his side. 

"But how-" I shook my head, looking around for the millionth time, unable to believe that the man who raised me was in front of me right now, "How am I here? How am I even seeing you, is it true, am I dead?" 

Sensei's smile grew as I rambled on, "Michelangelo, death would be too great for you. You've been through a lot, my son, but what you have done to protect those around you has made me one proud, rat," 

The sound of his voice sounded so nice. The look on his face was more satisfying than anything else that I could imagine right now. I was dead. I was dead and in a place I could run free forever. 

"You saw?" I muttered, feeling the sadness rising in the back of my throat. 

Mikey!

My brothers' voices were all I could hear. The look on Raph's face when he plunged the knife into my heart and when his eyes filled with guilt and complete regret. 

"I did, my son. I saw everything-- and now, I am here to tell you that it isn't your time yet," he answers, intertwining our fingers. I felt the familiar tug in my heart as his fur brushed against my skin. 

"My time?" I whispered, unable to rip my eyes away.

"The world is not ready to send one of their best champions to the grave," 

"I don't wanna go back, I miss you, we all miss you, Dad!" I blurted out, gripping his hand as I hit my knees again, "I'm dead! I died, Raph killed me, and you saw it, right? Why would I wanna go back to that? That isn't how death works!"

"Michelangelo!" Sensei scolds me, as I squeeze my eyes shut, refusing to cry here and now, "You are correct. That isn't how this works. But for you, and this wicked world, my son, is how your life is meant to be. I didn't raise four turtles to be normal, I raised them to be full of light and adventure, to never let anything bring them down. I've had many doubts, and one of them was that you, my son, would never give up, no matter how scared he got," 

"B-But, I am!" I shouted, listening to the echo of my voice reach for miles, "What's going to happen if I go back-- the family-- the team, everyone-- everyone is going to be all over the place, Sensei!" 

Splinter came in, as I sat snug on the grass with my knees and wrapped his arms around my neck, forcing me to inhale the scent I've known since childhood, "You will never be ready for what is to come, Michelangelo. And neither will your brothers. But they need you. They aren't a team without you," he sighs, tightening the grasp he has on my neck, "And Raphael, that turtle has always been so stubborn, short-tempered and very difficult to deal with on occasion. I must admit that, but you must forgive him, though he has his reasons not to earn that privilege,"

"I didn't want anyone else to get hurt, Dad," I muttered into his shoulder, finally giving in and hugging him back. 

"When you go back, I don't want you to be scared. I need you to keep a focused mind. I need you to take this chance at the second wind to finally grasp the meaning to who you truly are beneath all those insecurities, my son," he whispers, as I feel his fingers on the back of my shell, "And the moment you open your eyes, you will immediately come to realize that you are not the you, you know,"

"What do you mean, Sensei?" I mumbled off, confused by all of this.

"Remember my son," he says, pulling away from me to meet eye to eye, "An eye for an eye, and the world goes blind," 

"Dad?" 

Master Splinter smiled at me again, slipping from my grip as the world behind him faded into a black pit of nothing-- like something out of a nightmare. His fingers and hands in my own crumbled into diamonds, disappearing like dust. 

I started to panic again and this time, my panic was nothing like the fear I've experienced before. It burned. The burning fear in my gut forced me to cough just as the world faded in front of me and I started running and tripping over my own feet again before I could get going fast enough. The burning began to worsen and the feeling spread over my entire body-- forcing images in my mind that looked like human flesh frying under the sun, cooking and sizzling until black. 

I wanted to scream. The pain was too intense I had to stop. I fell to my hands and knees again, coughing and gagging for air as I looked behind me, watching the world fall to nothing while more and more pictures flashed through my head, in front of my eyes and there, I saw my heart. It gushed dark blood, black blood as it began to fry the same way the human flesh had done.

I groaned out, screaming so loud that I automatically knew that nobody would hear me. 

I was dead, after all. 

The veins in my arms were sticking out and I coughed again, clawing at my throat as I felt my heart pounding so hard that it reached it's limit, burning in front of me and lighting the biggest flame I think I ever witnessed. My skin was crawling like bugs were eating away at my bones, causing my shrieks and screams to come to a high pitch. 

Don't be scared. 

The underworld was catching up with me, tearing and ripping at my legs and swallowing me whole until I was too weak to crawl away from its mass and I fell in, letting my eyes flutter at the disappearing sight, once again, fading in front of me. 

My father, I already missed him. I missed my family-- but I didn't miss the thought of it breaking apart. I didn't miss the drama and all the yelling and like from the very start, I always hated it. I wanted away and to only stay if it was happy enough to bear witness. 

I felt my sense of humor dying by the minute, and the sound of my heart pounding came to a silent ringing in the back of my head until it stopped altogether.

I love you, Mikey. 

. . .Shut up, Mikey!

You're so annoying! 

All heart and no brains. . .

The voices, I could still hear them. Their words, their gestures and lovely faces. 

My hand twitched upon a hard surface. It was cold to the touch, though I didn't mind it. The clock ticking to my left was very loud for some reason and the darkness wrapping my mind like a blanket was on its final curtain call. 

Maybe it was all a dream. 

The scent of something strong filled my nose, and the pounding of my own heart never returned, reminding me that I truly was dead and that this was never a dream, to begin with.

My eyes flew open and the first thing I saw was, red. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dedicate one of my favorite songs to this singular chapter. 
> 
> If you have the time, please check it out if you are a fellow piano lover as such as myself. 
> 
> "I Know What You Are" Performed by- The City Of Prague/Philharmonic Orchestra. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	24. Sˡᵒʷ ᴸⁱᶠᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing off from Chapter Twenty-One, Raph, Leo and Don run through their plan to contact John Gotti, but in the mix of it all, and unexpected guest rises from the dead to surprise us all.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣ|||

Sˡᵒʷ ᴸⁱᶠᵉ

[ Raphael ]

"Is that the place?" questioned Donnie who decided to come along with us, why I don't know. 

He was getting weaker and weaker as the days went by and him fightin' these assholes wouldn't be the best of ideas. But then again, the idea to come here wasn't to fight but to talk. 

"Yeah, he should be here," Leo says, watching over the cliff edge, "If he's not here then I wouldn't have any other clue on how to track him unless Angel knows any information,"

"Don't get that dumb kid involved with this," I interrupted, sticking my hand out and pointing at the west end side of the house, "He'll be there, in his study" 

"She's not dumb, Raph. She's just young and ill-prepared for the world and what it has to offer. The whole party scene is just a cover-up for what she's really feeling inside. Her father is a mob boss for christ's sake," Don argues, ranting on and making me roll my eyes. 

"I want you to stay here while we are in there," Leo says to his mate, forcing me to zone out his goody-goody sweet talk about protection and whatnot. 

Ever since we left Cade's place, I've had a bad feeling about this plan. It was my own, but I didn't like the thought of the outcome. It could be a one out of a million and I didn't know what would happen. There was a chance we go in there, not to mention we are basically breakin' into the guy's place, and then we have to kill someone-- or, I have to. 

"I can handle it, Leo," Donnie tries to reassure Leo, but he takes a big no for an answer. 

I inhale sharply as a sharp gust of wind whips me in the face and I turn on my heel, to see that my maker and our newly found friend were standing there, watching with a bold face, "The hell are you doin' here?"

Leo and Donnie turn to see what I'm talking about to be just as surprised as me and lower their guard, "I came to be of services," he simply says, coming to stand next to me as I continue to cut my eyes at this fucker. 

"You're meant ta be at your place watchin' over Mikey's corpse!" I nearly shout, while putting a finger in his face. 

Cade stares eye to eye with me with a twinkle in his own, "Michelangelo's body is fine. I don't expect him to be awake for the next two days. So, please, focus here," he says furthering my annoyance as he walks away to stand by Leo, "Would you mind running me through the plan?"

"Gotta be kiddin' me," I mutter off, coming to the edge of the cliff, hearing the waves crash into the rocks nearby and down below the house in front of me.

"Raph, we aren't ready yet!" Leo scolds at me in a whisper as his hand lands on my bicep in a tight grip. 

"Well, I am!" I say not making eye contact and brushing Leo off with enough pressure to make him let go and I jump off the cliff, feeling the wind and adrenaline already piercing my skin and lighting a flame within me. 

I land with a hard crash, causing rocks and grass to fly everywhere and I start running while being inside the boundaries of the front yard and I climb up the wall and hop over, making sure no one else is around and with shock, I don't find a single guard or person in sight, though I catch the scent of someone in the air no problem. I follow the smell until I'm on the second-floor balcony and climb in with slow, careful movements in the hope that I don't make too much noise, or at least try.

Since my mutation, everything about my body and strength has accelerated at an abnormal rate. I don't have the need to work out every single time I feel weak. I don't have the desire for any of that anymore, though it wouldn't kill me to do it sometimes, maybe. My steps are quieter and my reflexes are at a level where I didn't even think was possible. 

On the top floor and inside, I found myself in a bedroom. The place was just as nice as I expected it would be, but no one was around. The scent I smelt was lingering further in the air and I continued to follow it, which led me down the hall and onto the first floor where I finally spotted two men dressed in black suits with a pistol on their hip, I assumed. 

John was a wealthy man, but he didn't seem to be too worried about his safety or the attempt of people breaking into his house, especially ones like me. 

Before I took my first step down the stairs, I felt a hand on my shoulder that gripped so tight it could probably leave bruises, "Get your hand off me," I muttered quiet enough, not taking my eyes off the two guards down the slope. 

"You need to relax," I heard Leo in my right ear, lowering his voice, "I'm already pissed enough that you ran off, blowing my plan up in my face!" 

"Big deal, we're inside aren't we?" I scoffed, feeling his eyes on me cutting sharp. 

"We may be inside, but that doesn't mean I'm not angry with you, Raphael. The next time I come up with a plan--" 

"Shut up!" I say controlling my temper as two more men enter the room and discuss something about position and location. Soon a few other people enter, and I begin to get suspicious. 

Most of them started to speak about a possible intrusion and my mind goes blank, wondering how the hell they would have known unless they have cameras hidden so good that even I couldn't see them. But I didn't see any. My entrance was completely discreet and outside the wall of where any nitwit would put a camera. 

"What're they talking about?" questioned Leo at my side who I quickly shushed by holding a hand up. 

I slowly backed myself up, bringing my brother with me as they mention a body that was found just south of the perimeter, drownin' in his own blood. I was starting to worry. And worry was a big word for me right now. 

How could I be so worried? What for? 

How could I have been so, blind? If that was even the word for it. Perhaps that was what I smelt while breaking in, but I know the difference. I knew it by fuckin' heart. The smell of any idiots blood would have been the first thing I got before I even reached the lawn. But I didn't. 

"Where's Cade?" I ask him, knowing he's listening as I'm still unable to rip my eyes away from the guards. 

"He's with Donnie. I told them to stay back and if I needed assistance that I'd radio him,"

I look down, finally breaking my stare while I continue to listen intently to the conversation being shared by the guards, as they were planning to scout the entire area and also mentioned that some of them should stick together in small groups to ensure that nobody got jumped by the intruder. 

"You might need to," I say glancing at my brother who looked just as concerned as I was feeling right about now.

"Is it necessary? You still haven't told me what they were talking about, did something happen to John?" 

"Just do it, Leo! I need to know that I'm not goin' fuckin' crazy here, they are sayin' that one of their men were found dead just now!" 

Leo looks at me with widening eyes and quickly fiddles with the small walkie talkie system that we've had goin' on for God knows how long and speaks directly into it, radioing to our brother but the other walkie doesn't click when spoken to, though it was meant to. 

"Donatello, come in," Leo says, keeping his voice down as we watch over the group of guards continue their conversation about splitting teams and working around the clock about their decision, "Donnie, are you there, come in!" 

I stare dead at my sibling as he shakes the walkie, thinking it was broken, "He's not answerin' you, Leo,"

"I'll be back," Leo announces before standing up to walk away but I grab him by the wrist so tight he winces at me just as I catch yet another scent in the air that wasn't only strange, but familiar. 

"You aren't goin' anywhere," I say standing up, getting ready to go down the stairs, "There's someone else in this house, and it sure as hell ain't friendly!"

"I have to check on him, Raph!" Leo fusses, trying to pull away from me in a panic, "He's not well, and you know that!" 

I keep my grip on my brother's wrist, saying fuck it all to being discreet. I slowly stand leading us both down the stairs and as expected the guards immediately notice us while pointing and aiming the barrel of their guns at us. 

"John Gotti is in danger," I say aloud, letting everyone hear me clearly, "We aren't the danger, but if you choose to not trust me on my word then you're all gonna die either by me or by the real intruder," 

"Who are you?" asked the masked man of the group, still aiming his gun with very little hesitance. 

"My name isn't important. Some of ya may already know me, or my brothers, we work for your boss. Or did," I say deepening my tone, "It's one of the reason's why we came here, was to talk to him in person," 

The guards start whispering to one another about me being familiar, or some even knowing exactly who I am. They even lowered their guns, recognizing the wrong in their steps.

"Mr. Gotti is sleeping right now, what business do you have with him, freak?" one of them snaps, making the edges of my mouth twitch. 

Just as I was about to answer the man's question, a loud crash and a gust of wind blew through the double doors behind me and Leo. I saw a body flying through the air which landed at the feet of the guards below us. It was John, who was still wearing his pajamas. His heart was pounding in his chest which told me that he was still alive and breathing-- for now. 

The guards below us pulled their guns out again, aiming them all at me just as one man rushed to aid the groaning man on the floor who was still surprisingly conscious. 

"We need to get out of here before they open fire!" Leo warns behind me who stuck close with the grip I still kept on his wrist. 

I was frozen solid, smelling the blood at the foot of the stairs, along with a million others in the air and suddenly I caught the familiar one again, letting it flood my head like a wave. 

"Raph!" my brother tried, while pulled at my arm. 

While watching John squirm from the landing the guards in front were thrown from many different directions as Leo yanked at my arm again, saying words I couldn't quite understand. 

The bodies were thrown through windows, doors and against the wall, breaking and crashing paintings, and breaking furniture, leaving John on the floor alone again at the foot of the stairs. It all happened so fast that I didn't even notice the other soul in the room. 

"If I were you, I'd listen to fearless, big brother," 

That voice, that chipper like tone. I couldn't hear his heart, but his voice alone.

Was I seein' shit?

I felt Leo stop struggling and his own voice went dead as if someone clamped a hand over his mouth to shut him up. But I knew that wasn't the case.

"Mikey?" I said, finally letting the words slip past my lips. 

My voice sounded broken. 

"Correct," he grins wickedly up at me from the bottom of the staircase, forcing a chill down my shell. 

I couldn't come up with a single word. I couldn't even move or lift a finger. The red in my little brother's eyes put the fear of something I've never seen inside of me, or even felt before in my entire life. 

"What a surprise, I've made the big one, speechless," he giggles, walking a few steps forward to the man still squirming on the floor, covered in cuts and bruises. 

His smile, his laugh was all the same but something behind it was evil, crisp and just downright attractive. His movements were swift, deadly and almost effortlessly light. He was the intruder. He was the destruction of this entire place. And the bodies, it made my skin crawl. And on top of that, who knew how many he's killed since he's been awake. 

The chance of him bein' out of control is within the air, and the look he was givin' me wasn't something I was ready to face yet, but he was here. I was being forced to face it whether I wanted to or not. 

"Leo, do you mind telling me what the hell is going--" Donnie's voice echoed into the room as he ran in, stopping dead in his tracks when he saw what we were seeing. I wasn't looking in his direction, but I knew he was on the balcony behind us with shock on his face. 

"Look who it is!" Mikey remarks, as I finally release my grip on Leo's wrist but he doesn't move, "The gang is all here!" he laughs, clapping his hands together. 

Right behind my little brother, Cade appears, blocking the front door, "I'm sorry-- but, I had to let him go," 

Over Mikey's head, I stare into my maker's eyes, "You knew that he was awake?" 

"I couldn't stop him, so, I gave him a location," he says, looking defeated but honest, "He wanted to know where you were, Raphael," 

"And now, I've found you," Mikey smiles again, lighting a flame in my chest I thought I'd never get back, "The last memory I have is me sacrificing myself, and the last thing I remember feeling is you stabbing me in the guts," 

"Mikey-" Leo says, taking a step down in front of me, "It's been days since that happened, days, we tried everything-- everything to bring you back, but there was only one way to do it,"

Mikey's bright eyes flash towards my brother, looking alarmed but clearly tested by his words, "I didn't come here to hurt anyone," he mumbles, lifting a hand allowing me to see the orange fabric in his hand that's so stained with blood that the color before was barely visible, "But I do have a reason," 

I watched his eyes, being cautious as I felt a dark shadow hovering over my shoulders. 

"There shouldn't be a reason, little brother," Leo tried, as he took another step down the stairs, "We tried saving you!"

Mikey looked at Leo again, watching his movements carefully but not paying much attention as he faced me again, clenching his fingers around the fabric in his fist. 

"I came here to kill you, Raph," 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanna start this note by apologizing to those who have been waiting and waiting for an update. 
> 
> The past couple of days I have been battling with an infection and of course, my anxiety again. I've been dying to get this bit out for a while as I've had it planned in my head as some badass scene with Mikey finally coming back. 
> 
> I'm super excited to get the rest out and continue off where we left. Until then, I wanna dedicate a very specific song to this part, specifically when Raph see's Mikey in his immortal form for the first time. 
> 
> Black Velvet - Alannah Myles 
> 
> Until next time, Cowabunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	25. ᴾʰᵃˢᶜⁱⁿᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᴾʰᵃˢᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing directly from the last chapter, we feel what it's like from Michelangelo's point of view to want and need to kill his own brother. Things get heated with a bloody fight and soon Mikey comes to realize the true reason why he became what he was forced to become.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣᴵⱽ

ᴾʰᵃˢᶜⁱⁿᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿ ᴾʰᵃˢᵉ

[ Michelangelo ]

I didn't wanna hurt, kill or shed blood. But I craved it. I wanted to see it underneath my fingernails at the end of the day after an endless slaughter. My brain was talking to me again, but it was different. It felt different. It was saying things that I would have feared as a kid. 

Hell, I fear it now. I even fear myself. 

The first thought that surfaced my mind was the idea, the imagery of my own brother's blood on my hands. My mate, my best friend. I wanted him dead. I heard the voices telling me so. They were slimy and obsessive. Like a snake, slithering in the grass. But only demons could understand their language. 

I was one of those demons. I was one of those that they chose to speak to. I couldn't even understand where my own words were coming from. I never spoke like this, so, logical, so, in tune with my thoughts. Inside, my mind was being lit a fire and torn to shreds.

Tortured. 

The burning didn't vanish unless I drank the disgusting bile from another person. It didn't go unless I tasted the bitter want of copper and musk. The stuff, the substance that made me puke every time I saw it after fighting the foot. They'd always leave marks on my siblings, and sometimes, if lucky-- me too. 

Splinter said I wouldn't understand, and he was right. I don't. I don't understand. But he didn't either. He didn't understand that I was better off dead, that I was better off staying with him in that dream world, or whatever it was. 

Sensei, I'm scared. 

Blinking rapidly my entire focus was on my brother just as reality washed over me like a wave. His own eyes were locked on me. He was in shock. Pure and utter shock. I probably should be too, but that feeling was long gone by the time I killed the guy outside. 

It didn't bother me. Somewhere deep inside I felt like it should. But I couldn't bother letting my heart control me again. It was bad. It was, stupid. At least I think. I was sensitive, and scared of everything-- but now, nothing or less made me fear it. 

So you think, Mikey. 

"You don't know what you're saying--" Leo says, not taking his eyes off me while making yet another move to step closer towards me, which I didn't mind. My intentions were not to hurt or kill the others, but only one. 

"I know exactly what I'm saying" I smile at fearless, moving past him, finally taking the first step up the stairs that I've clearly ruined with all the crashing and whatnot. I couldn't believe I did all that. Hah, me, I did that. 

"I won't fight you, Mikey," Raph corrects, forcing me to tilt my head to one side with confusion. 

I look around as if someone else named Mikey was in the same room as me, and then I point one finger at my bare chest, "Oh, but, Raphie-- you had no problem fighting me before all this other stuff happened!"

"That was before!" he shouts, clenching both his fists, "Before you died-- before I killed you!" 

"Ah," I sigh with a great big inhale and lowering my head then snapping it back to peer up at the taller turtle, "That's right, that is right. You aren't wrong-- but!" I then pause, taking another step, "I wasn't only just talking about the whole murdering thing-- you know, stabbing me, with Leo's blade. I was talking about everything before that. The whole thing where I've been nothing but your punching bag since I could walk thing!" 

Raph's eyes were serious but clear of emotion as I spoke. His heart was dead in his chest, and the veins on his arms no longer held the warmth I longed for, "Mikey-- that stuff is meant to be behind us-- this, all of this wasn't meant to happen, and you know that!" 

"Do I?" I mutter, knowing he'll hear me, "Do I truly know that, Raphael?" 

"Michelangelo, you need to listen to me--" Cade pushes while putting a hand on my shoulder, that causes me to react quickly into grabbing him strongly by the wrist, twisting it and yanking him so hard that his body flies inward and over my head and into the wooden staircase. The entire thing collapses on impact and that's when I make my move, jumping over the gaping hole and at my brother who dodges the blow and up the shattering staircase. 

"Leo!" I hear Donnie yelp only to realize that Leo was hanging on for dear life on a dangling piece of wood that was nearly broken off at the end just above the basement floor. The drop was lengthy and in the back of my mind, I could feel the built-up need to save him and pull him up banging on the inner walls of my brain. 

He'll live. 

My thoughts ran wild as he was shouting for me to help him, but I couldn't help but stare with joy as I slowly turned my attention towards my older brother. I heard Leo slipping away as I jumped again, climbing the stairs like a wild animal and clawing my way to victory just before Raph lands a flat-footed kick to my chest, disappearing from the room. 

I fall onto my shell, immediately getting to my feet and running after him while letting a laugh escape my lips, finding this all so very amusing that the one and only is running from me. Me, of all people. 

My feet were only just a blur as the wind consumed me, making my body feel light and flightless as I moved, following my brother's scent that ended us far from the real scent of human blood. I was in the familiar grounds by the time I stopped on the tips of my toes. 

The field. 

My brother was only a few feet from me, but facing away allowing me to watch his shoulders rise and fall from the anger I'm sure. He always did that when he breathed so heavily you could smell the fire in his stomach brewing. 

"I'm not fightin' you," he mumbles with a slight growl and clenched fists at his sides, hanging low.

"But it's why I'm here," I reply simply while earning another snarl from his lips as he finally turns to face me and his eyes are burning a fiery type of red. 

"I don't care why you're here, I didn't want this! I knew you'd hate me, I knew that you'd be mad at me, but killin' me-- you know it won't work," 

"Won't work? But vampire's killin' vampire's has been a thing for centuries!" I laugh, feeling hysterical. 

"It's true though, Mikey-- You have so much to learn, and I wanna help ya with it. I thought I couldn't do it. I thought I was mad, completely delirious with the need to kill-- for god sake, I killed you, I killed the only one who truly ever understood me!" 

His face told honesty and so did his heart. I could feel it and hear it, but my mind spoke for me.

"Liar," I muttered, launching myself at him, clawing my fingers at his skin, slashing mark after mark across his arms as he fought me off, throwing me down, trying to pin me to the grass but he failed, allowing me to upper kick him so hard he flew a few feet away where I immediately came up, clawing again, trying to bite him, choke him, do anything I possibly could to hurt him, but I couldn't. 

My mission, my objective was to kill, and I couldn't. 

I was actually panting-- breathing.

Looking down at Raph, I could see that he too was out of breath. Like old times, after sparring together in the dojo. The marks on his arms. They were bloody but permanent. 

"Mike," my brother says with a quiet voice as I squeeze my eyes shut letting the burning in my body return. I quickly crawl off of him and walk across the field, needing the distance. 

I wanted to hate him, to kill him, to rid of his musk that I still obsess over even when I'm dead.

"How'd you do it?" I question, staring down at the fabric in my hands again. 

"Do what?" he responds, closing in on me. 

"This!" I wave my hands over myself, turning to face him, "What even am I? Why'd you let me become what I am?"

Raph looks at me like I've offended him, "We had no other choice!"

"You had another!" I yell. 

"Like what, let ya die?" he shouts back, getting in my face, "Do you honestly think I'd pass up an opportunity like that?"

"You didn't seem to hesitate when you put that fucking knife through my heart!" I scream in return, shoving him so hard his feet scrap across the dirt, inching him away from me. 

"I didn't even know who I was then, Mikey!" Raph goes on, holding his head then looking me in the eyes, mirroring my own, "When I saw the look on your face, when you-- when you said what you said, I could feel what you felt-- it's like you snapped me out of whatever was wrong with me!" 

I glance down again, curling my fingers inward as I turn away from him, "You're trying to do that for me, so I don't make the same mistake as you did," 

"Yes," he sighs, sounding relieved making his presence known to be closer than before, "Why can't you see that?" 

"I'm trying to see too much right now," I respond, still looking down at my blood-stained hands, "I can't seem to catch up with my own mind or thoughts, and now, I can't even feel my own heart. I no longer feel the pain I did before, but hate, I feel hate and it won't go away or leave me alone," 

I allow my hands to drop at my sides, feeling my brother's body closing in on me, "Let me help you then," he offers, being only inches from me as I feel his fingers on my arm, slowly moving down to caress my own, "Let's help each other," 

Right at that moment, I felt a spark inside of me. A spark that can only be lit by specific things, specific people and unlocked by specific emotions. A feeling that I thought I'd never get back. 

Our fingers intertwine, linking together like a puzzle piece as I slowly turn, seeing the look at his face. It was sad, and full of hate, along with an unfulfilling amount of regret. 

"Did you miss me?" I couldn't help but ask, squeezing my brother's hand in mine, the touch being electric, although cold. 

"Is that supposed to be some kind of joke, Mikey?" he says having a smile already forming on his face, which immediately filled me with joy. 

"I wanna know,"

"When you died, I didn't even know about it till Leo found me," Raph goes on, flood my mind with memories, "He told me that the only way to save your life was by me givin' you my blood,"

"So?" I questioned, urging him on. 

"So, I gave you my blood. When he told me that I killed ya, I didn't have much of a world left. I went back to the lair, where it all began, and tried to kill myself, but I didn't even come close. So, for the next week after that, I watched over you. I never left your side,

"I didn't think you could care about someone that much," was the only thing I could come up with while he spoke to me. Our fingers locked together, squeezing as Raph ran his thumb over my knuckles so soothingly I nearly forgot about what we truly were now. 

Raph's face softened at my words and he chuckles at me, "I'm not that bad-- at least now I'm not," he corrects, coming an inch closer. 

"I think you got better, and I got worse," says, letting my voice turn to a whisper as Raph rose both of our hands up, our fingers still together, rubbing gently. 

"Yeah, the tables have definitely turned if you're the one throwin' guards around, includin' our brother's," he chuckles again, making me realize the default of my own actions. 

I didn't help Leo. 

"Will they be mad at me?"

"Who-- oh, no, Cade won't be mad that ya put him through a flight of stairs and left Leo hangin' above a very short drop, which was a wine cellar by the way," he grins as I punch him lightly in the arm and his face twists like I hurt him. 

Was I stronger than my own brother?

"I'm gonna need you to run me through everything-- and you won't be the only one having to explain things to me. Not only that but it won't be the first time you say it to me," I sigh, wanting to look away again, feeling totally humiliated for my actions. 

"Mikey," Raph manages to whisper while lifting my chin into the air so our eyes can meet again, "I don't think you'll have much trouble rememberin' these things anymore, plus, you were always the wisest and the smartest-- maybe not book smart, but you paid attention even when you pretended to not act like it,"

I couldn't see myself but with his words, my eyes were sure to sparkle in this dark dim daylight over my head in the field where many memories flooded my mind of arguments, long talks and shared walks, including... sex. 

My mind began to wonder and soon I was thinking about things that were maybe left best for later. But I simply couldn't help but think about it. At least a little bit. 

"Raph, what're we supposed to do about um, reproducing?" I ask, unable to come up with a proper way to say the exact words. 

For once my head wasn't speaking for me. 

"Reproducing?" he questioned, obviously confused. 

"Oh, um, well, how would we, or do we still do it the same?" 

"Do what, Mikey? Be more specific!" 

I huff loudly not wanting to say it, "Sex, Raph! Sex, is it still the same?"

My brother stares down at me with amusement, "You're serious, aren't ya?" 

"Don't laugh at me," I whine, quickly covering my face with further embarrassment, "Just answer the damn question,"

"Why the hell wouldn't it be the same?"

"I don't know!" I defend, "Are there any differences like I've seen?"

"Differences? Oh, you mean like-- well, Cade has told me some things, but I don't really think they're important right now," he answers, walking in the midst of the field and I follow being quite slow in case I get carried away. 

"You'll have to tell me eventually-"

"Why were ya thinkin' about that anyway? Did ya miss me that much while you were gone?" he laughs, shoving me with his shoulder and I don't budge, knowing that my face would be a crimson color if I still had any blood left in my body. 

"I-I was just curious," I retort, walking alongside him, stepping over the flowers to avoid squishing them. 

"The other's will be back at Cade's place. I'm sure that he will have some new injuries to attend to on Leo, and he will be wonderin' where we ran off too and if we're killing each other," 

"Believe me, I'd like to," I say catching him off guard as I make a run for it, knowing he'll be after me soon enough. 

I keep going unable to stop as I run and jump through the trees, leaving the wind in my wake and not having to stop for a breath of air or a break. The colors of nature seemed so much brighter now, closer even. The farther I ran, getting closer to the city I could hear other things, perhaps animals, maybe people and that's when the burning returned. 

I had totally forgotten about it. 

Finally coming to a stop, I look about, scanning the forest, being on the near edge of the city and smelling the air, making the burning worsen. The scent alone wasn't animal, but human. I couldn't help but visually see the stretch of veins in their throat, and the blood scabbing from a recent scratch on the knee. 

Maybe they were rock climbing--

"Mikey!" my brother interrupted, as I looked up at him, feeling my fists shivering and shaking.

"I need to, I need it," I mutter, letting my eyes close as the smell strangled me. 

"No, ya don't. Not now anyway-- I promise once we're back at Cade's place, you'll be fine," 

"How would you know? How the hell do you even deal with this!" I shout, clenching my fists so tight that my nails dig into the palms of my hands. 

I heard my brother sigh, his hot breath practically smacking me in the face, filling me full of unwanted hormones, "He helped me through it. And you-" he paused, coming closer, "You completed it by comin' back into my life," 

I felt my brother at my side while trying to calm myself from the thoughts inside my head, invading me, then suddenly they all vanished when his arms were around me, pulling me in close against his bare chest, "Raph," 

"We need to get back, and I need you to focus for me," he whispers into my left ear, allowing his arms to tighten around my waist. 

"I will on one condition," I mutter, turning in his arms to face him with a reddening face. 

He shakes his head, amused at me again, "Anything for the brat," he grins. 

I snake my hands up his biceps, feeling how cold his skin is now, "Kiss me," 

My brother stares down at me with a look that either feels like shock or just enjoyment. He clearly was hesitating and I couldn't blame him, I couldn't give him crap because I too felt hesitance in my own body. I felt like I couldn't do this, and I felt like it was one of those first times again. One of those special times. 

I leaned up, being on my near tiptoes in the soft grass, as our snouts brushed and I nuzzled my brother's face, letting happiness shower over my head. Our lips came together, but just enough to feel it as we kissed, sharing one of the most intimate smooches I think I've ever gotten from him. 

Raph's hands moved from my shell to the underside, grasping my hips and bringing me in closer, kissing me deeper as I hissed into his mouth, knowing that something was happening. Something bad, but good. We needed to stop, we needed to get going and getting back. 

"Mikey," he breathed, inching our faces away from one another, "Let's go before we get too carried away" 

I watched silently trying to collect my thoughts as my brother wandered off, heading for the city again. Then I smiled, knowing that for the rest of my life that he would have to deal with me.

Dead or alive. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	26. ᵀʰᵉ ᴳᵃⁿᵍˢ ᴬˡˡ ᴴᵉʳᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing off from Donatello's point of view, the night falls to an end when Mike and Raph finally return.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣⱽ

ᵀʰᵉ ᴳᵃⁿᵍˢ ᴬˡˡ ᴴᵉʳᵉ

[ Donatello ]

"Is he gonna be alright?" 

"Donnie, I told you, I'm fine," Leo stubbornly scoffs at me. 

"You may be fine, but your leg is broken, Leonardo," Cayden sighs, standing up after wrapping my brother's leg with bandages, "I'm beginning to wonder how many times I'll have to patch you up in the upcoming months, or perhaps years," 

Leo glares towards our friend and while I shake my head, "He's right-- When did you get so clumsy?" I then tease, grinning at my mate. 

"I'll give you clumsy" he fires back causing me to flush, "Plus, it technically wasn't my fault that I fell. We all know who to blame here," 

"Yeah," Cade agrees, seating himself in the brand new kitchen chairs that were recently installed, "Unfortunately I took the fall too, but I bet neither of you would be brave enough to actually blame him," he laughs softly. 

"I don't think I could ever get used to the way he is now," I muttered, tracing the pattern on the front of my hoodie that spreads out in circles across my bloating stomach. 

Leo peers over at me, "Well, neither could I, but whether you like it or not he's who he is now, and we have to help him get through it," 

During this, Cayden stands up, tending to the tea ketal heating on the stovetop, "You or Donatello will not be of any help. Emotionally perhaps, but physically or mentally it would be useless. I'm sure Raphael plans to tend to the wounds that he's left open since Michelangelo has entered further mutation,"

"Either way-- we will try. It's our job as a family-- as brothers. If not blood, then by our history together we will prove that we love him no matter what he is. And even as a lover, we will show him," Leo states, clenching an opened fist that is splayed on the dining table. 

Cade fixes two cups of tea and places them in front of each of us on small saucer plates, "Drink up, it's a special remedy" he says, cleaning up the table and ridding of the medical utensils and bloodied bandages.

"You might wanna throw those away" I suggest, picking up the cup, letting the warm drink soothe the back of my throat. 

Cade quirks an eyebrow at me and removes the trash from the table, "So, are we gonna talk about how we just left John and his men lying around like a bunch of fish out of water?" Leo questions, sipping from his own cup. 

"There was nothing we could do. We practically exposed ourselves outright. On top of that, Mikey killed one of them and possibly a ton more during that little fit he pulled. I'm sure that John is fine, and one of these days we will get him while he's alone and ask about Jameson. I trust that he's taking good care of Codey and not leaving him in a trash bin or something" I ramble, staring down into the dark abyss of my drink. 

"And if he isn't?" Leo then adds, catching my attention with the tone of his voice and I then noticed the smirk on his face and quickly began wondering what he was playing at and I grinned back, mocking his expression.

"Then he'll pay" I simply answer, tapping my finger on the table after finishing what's left of my tea.

Later on in the night, the three of us end up in the living room, where Leo was dozing off to a random movie chosen by yours truly and drooling on my shoulder. I didn't mind it. In fact, I welcomed this type of silly affection. I missed it. I missed him. And I missed us. Hell, I missed the four of us just being one. I knew now exactly how my little brother felt when he grieved for a real connection between the four of us. I could feel how he felt when the separation and distance kicked in. It reminded me deeply of what a black void actually tasted like, and the pain was suffocating to me. 

The sound on the screen was turned down real low, which was how I liked it. Not too loud but welcoming enough to still enjoy the peaceful silence. I then glanced at my mate, noticing that his hand was placed over my left thigh. My mind was immediately filled with the memories of the night we went out to that stupid costume party at the club. Soon, my reminiscing drifted further and I bit the inside of my cheek, remembering the minutes in the bathroom that Leo and Raph put together in their own mind. 

It was all apart of their plan. 

I could already feel the blood surfacing on my cheeks, including other places. I glanced down at Leo's hand, slowly placing my own over his and wrapping my fingers around him. The heat from my body was practically spilling out of me at this point and it wouldn't hurt to just fool around once. Or twice. Perhaps more. 

I felt Leo stir at my side and squeeze my hand tighter in return. I allowed my eyes to travel back to what's on-screen and it was at the one part I always avoided while watching it. At least, when I was much younger I did. The scene was intimate between man and woman but forced. It always brought such joy to see how much Allie and Noah loved one another, even after everything they went through. They experienced heaven as teens and hell as adults which brought them back together with immense power. 

My brothers hated watching The Notebook, but I couldn't help but love it as equal to their hate. 

"You're still up?" came a whisper in my ear, breaking me from my perverted thoughts. 

"Gotta finish the film," I respond, tilting my head off to the side allowing Leo to nuzzle me. 

"You've seen this one so many times though, how can you stand the same one over and over, Don?" he chuckles softly, sending shivers down my spine. 

"It's a favorite," I say as Leo releases my hand, touching my stomach. 

"You're feeling okay, right?" he questions, letting the warmth of his voice greet my ear again. 

"Better than usual. I don't think I'll be able to fight for a while though," I answer honestly, while quietly restraining myself from the visuals on screen. 

"You're feeling better, but that smell coming off you tells me otherwise, Donnie," he laughs again, making the flush on my cheeks deepen. I had nearly forgotten that when I or any of us got like this, it wasn't only obvious, but the smell was horrendous. The scent was sweet but strong enough to tell the other how you're feeling just by a sniff. 

"I guess it's my hormones," I said, trying to play it all off even though I wanted him to notice right from the start. It wasn't that good of a time to be messing around anyway considering Leo's leg was broke and I was pregnant, but-- I didn't really care. Whatever the risks may be, I still needed him. Or at least one of my brothers. 

"Oh, so, it doesn't mean anything?" he asks as I feel his lips at my neck, kissing gently and leaving obvious trails of his saliva behind. 

"I-It has been awhile, Leo," I retort, my eyes slowly closing at his touch. 

"Hah, well, I think we can both agree that we need each other because being around Raph has been a real pain for me," he chuckles, placing yet another kiss on my neck. 

"I guess we both feel the same then. His stench has been really difficult to endure since he's been back," I say extending my arm, touching my brother's shoulder, and tracing the pattern of his tattoos. 

"Try kissing him when he's like that," Leo mutters, catching my attention then that's when I let out a soft laugh while dragging my fingers along his chest, etching my way towards the crook of his neck. 

"I can only imagine," 

"I bet," 

"No betting-- it's true," I quickly defend, sliding my hand around to the back of Leo's neck, bringing his head in for a close, and letting our lips brush for even a moment, which drives me to the point of where I can't really wait anymore and I crush our mouths together. 

My brother doesn't hold himself to it and kisses me back just as hard. Our breathing was the most alluring sound to me right now. The noises were just as nice and delicious as I remembered. If that made any sense. I didn't really care. My mind was set on one thing and one thing only right now.

"Leo," I pant, "What about your leg?"

"Who cares about my leg-" he responds throwing my words out the window, clearly desperate while hoisting me into his lap, and already shoving his hands up my shirt that I can't help but groan at his fingers raking down my sides. 

"L-Leo, I don't wanna-- ah~" I gasp into his mouth, knowing his fingers have found my tail that was already wiggling with anticipation in order to escape. The surface of his fingers ran solidly along the base all the way to the tip, teasing me. 

"Stop worryin' so much and just let things happen, Don," my brother whispers latching on to my throat again, keeping his grip on my tail.

"Well, well, well," the sound of another voice ripples through me, drowning out the sounds coming from the other and I snap my head in their direction, immediately being able to see the silhouettes of my brothers giggling at me and my mate.

"Man, if I knew they were messing around I wouldn't have come in-- Don't look at me, dudes, it was Raph's idea!" 

"Ugh, Mikey" Leo whines, hiding his face in my shoulder while removing his hands from my hoodie in a rush. 

"I don't think It's a good idea to be messin' around in someone else's place anyhow," the eldest in the room comments as I untangle my legs from Leo's lap. 

"Please, you are one to talk, Raph," Leo snaps in his direction as my little brother makes himself known under the dim lighting coming from the fireplace, and he flashes his same old smile at me.

The silence in the room suddenly swallows me whole as I look at him. He was still my little brother, but not. Once again, I couldn't make any sense out of my own vocabulary let along put words together to greet him. 

"D, you alright?" he questions, taking a step closer as I blink rapidly. 

"Keep your distance there, Mike," Raph says, being at my little brother's side in under a second. 

"I won't hurt him, Raph-- so, chill, I think I know who's blood to suck and not," he giggles adorably, reminding me just how sweet he sounds when he laughs. 

"I just-- I can't believe you're really here. I mean, I saw you, but, now that you're actually in front of me, I don't really know how to react is all," I said, speaking with a hint of pure joy and shock in my voice. 

"I'm here! I'm queer! And-- maybe just a little evil," he smiles, bringing a grin of my own to my face as he comes forward, hugging me so tight it hurts. 

"M-Mikey!" I wince sharply while immediately reaching for his smaller shoulders, trying to pry him off. During this, Leo struggles to stand and Raph notices this very quickly and frowns. 

"You fell didn't ya?"

Leo peers at our older brother while balancing himself on one foot, which shouldn't be too hard for him considering how fit he is. Mikey finally releases me when a familiar kick is delivered from my stomach and he stands back in awe then meets my eyes, as if he's not sure what just happened. 

"I'm not worried about it. I'm just glad Donnie is alright," he praises, putting a kiss on my cheek. 

"So, I haven't lost my chance, huh?" Mikey spoke, as I turned my attention back towards him. In fact, all three of us did. 

"What do you mean?" Leo asks him, but Mikey paid no mind and had his eyes set on one thing and one thing only-- and that was my stomach. 

"I think he's talkin' about Venus," Raph informs, taking a seat on the couch next to us, "He's been so worried, thinkin' that he missed all chances to meet her," 

"Stay outta my head, Raphie!" he whines, biting his lip, and obviously holding back laughter, "I thought that you might have given birth already" 

I shake my head, "I know you didn't really think about it, but I was in the room back there, Mikey. And even if I did, the egg wouldn't hatch for an extra week or so. You would have plenty of time," I then smile, lightly patting his head. 

Leo nudges me, "It's nice to see that you got out well," 

Mikey looks Leo up and down and sighs, "Right. Your leg-- I'm really sorry about that, bro. I could have helped you and I chose differently"

"I was just teasin' little bro. Cade got me out of there-- he was the one that made the hole after all," he laughs, and for once, Raph joins him, which surprises me. 

"You fucked him up, honestly" he agrees, shrugging into the couch cushions. 

"I'd rather not talk about what I did back there, guys. I still don't really know how to control what I am. But, with the help of my family, I'm sure I'll be back on track in no time," Mikey beams, "I just know it,"

"It won't be easy, Mikey. But the only thing we can do from here is to try and you will have to make the same amount of effort, so that means no games, no pranks, and most importantly-- focus," Leo tells him and this time I was the one to nudge him with my elbow and he grins at me.

"I got it, fearless, but I don't think I'm gonna be having trouble with keeping my focus for a very long time. But anyway- let's move on from this mumble-jumble. Where is Cade at, I think I have some more apologizing to do," Mikey says, looking between me and Leo. 

"I'm not exactly sure. He mentioned about an hour before the movie that he would be going out for tonight," Leo says as I finally decide to sit down with a soft huff. 

"He also said not to wait up," I then added, noticing that Raph is staring at me. 

"Are you alright?" he questions with a slight whisper, and I nod my head with an answer. 

"Just a little out of breath is all," 

The question alone if I was alright was really beginning to bother me. Not because it was annoying-- but it got me thinking about if I truly was okay. I felt normal, but not. I felt weaker but mentally strong. 

I couldn't wait for Venus to be here. I couldn't wait to meet her, to hold her in my arms. But from here on out, I could already tell that the upcoming months were going to be rough. But having my brother back and not dead, was truly the beginning of a new start. Not only a new start but a new life at something different. I had two brothers that were not of this world. But beneath all of that, I knew in my heart that nobody-- or nothing could compare to our messed up family.

On the plus side, we had the ultimate protection, and an endless amount of love to share. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Greetings TMNT Lovers & Bookworms ]
> 
> We've finally hit the big two-five and for the next five, I'll be finishing up and posting all at once. 
> 
> It's a pretty big goal for me because I can't believe it's been twenty-five already including the finishing with the first book which I still can't seem to famish. But I wanna thank you all for the feedback, the inspiration and of course the constant love for this series!
> 
> It has it's ups and downs, it's confusion and most importantly it's love, obsession and constant crave for sexual tension. And from here, I can't wait to show even more of that. 
> 
> I love you all. 
> 
> Cowabunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	27. ᵀᵃⁱⁿᵗᵉᵈ ᴹᵃᵗᵉʳⁱᵃˡ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter will have No Summary as this Chapter is apart of the five-part series I've been writing for the last week or so.
> 
> I planned to post these when all five were done, but I've decided to keep it traditional and post the first four and keep number five for later as I'm still not finished with it. 
> 
> For now, I hope you enjoy the next four, as it is a wild ride that you will both love and hate. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣⱽᴵ

ᵀᵃⁱⁿᵗᵉᵈ ᴹᵃᵗᵉʳⁱᵃˡ

[ Raphael ]

The summer weather was slowly fading as August crept closer, and closer. I couldn't wait really. Although, I dreaded the amount of birthdays I was gonna have to endure, including my own. 

It was the last week of July and after a whole other week with Mikey back in our lives, things were beginning to go back to normal. Our type of normal. But when I thought about it, it wasn't as much our normal anymore. It was a different normal since I became what I am now. 

Since Mikey did too. 

He was progressing faster than I thought he would. Though now, he's got a temper. A temper that's possibly worse than mine, and that's sayin' somethin' truly odd. He's learned to feed, as Cade called it, only by the blood of animals or hospital donations that Cade could easily get his hands on, and when that conversation came about, I didn't even wanna know how he managed to get a load of that stuff. I enjoyed it either way and for once, I didn't feel like such an animal.

I wasn't human that's for sure. I wasn't even sure how much of a turtle I was anymore, but either way-- I still felt like me. A better me. A better me who can control his emotions and temptations. I sometimes wonder if this was my callin' as they say. 

"Raph?" Leo's voice came, interrupting my thoughts thankfully. 

"Huh?" I snap my head in his direction, comin' to realize that we were still in the middle of some type of physical therapy bullshit. I was still kinda peeved that Mikey got Leo's leg broken, due to him not helping him up before he fell. But I couldn't hold on to a grudge that Leo was obviously already over. 

"You gonna help me, or are you just gonna stand there daydreaming?" Leo struggles, still hanging onto my arms for support, but I quickly help him stand straight again as he was slipping down a bit. The fracture in his leg wasn't much of a fracture anymore, it was a solid break and in order to get better, even if we are fast healers, Cade and even Donnie agreed that Leo goes through some practice runs with walkin' and other exercises. 

"How long do we gotta do this?" I ask him, feeling a bit impatient which is odd because I've felt fine the entire day and it's only five. 

"We aren't even an hour in, Raphael!" he winces, letting a huff of air slip past his lips, "Do you have somewhere to be?" he then questions, meeting my fixed eyes that are sure to be ablaze by now. 

"No, I'm just feelin' a little off is all," I answer honestly for once, allowing him to walk forward, Leo nearly being close enough to embrace. 

"Off?" he winces again, nearly falling for the fourth time since we started and I catch him and he sighs, already seeming to be frustrated too from the way his nostrils flare from his slip. 

"Yeah, try not to worry about me and focus on what we're really doin' here," I order, moving in closer. 

"I don't even wanna do this! God, do you think I wanted it? But apparently, I have to learn to walk all over again! I thought this kind of crap only happened when you broke your foot or something" he complains, bracing one hand on my bicep and the other on my chest. 

I immediately came to realize that he was pretty much right. But doin' this would be good for him in the long run. I didn't wanna argue or disagree, or even agree so I bite back a laugh and release it with just enough power to surprise my brother. He eyes my face as the smile on my lips only disappears halfway. 

"Sorry-- you're just uh, kinda cute when you're all frustrated," I remark, with a slight smirk. 

Leo's lips fall into a hard line but then he obviously can't help but smile back at me with a blush already creeping onto his face, "I appreciate that, but if we're gonna focus, then that means you can't be flirting with me," 

"And why not?" I question, moving in closer until there isn't any room left.

I feel Leo stiffen in front of me and his eyes don't only leave mine but the color on his face deepens. I always loved makin' him of all people get red. It was super hot, and it always looked so cute on my brother. The brother who's just as short-tempered as me, and the one who never takes anything as a joke. When I do these sorts of things to him, I feel deep down that I'm the only one who can make him really reach outside of his dominant role as a leader. 

"Because," he pauses to clear his throat, still not looking me in the eye to avoid further arousal, "You're meant to be helping me!" 

I chuckle, letting go of Leo's right arm which makes him finally look at me, but in a panic type of way-- he was afraid of falling again and maybe I could use this to my advantage. 

I needed a little fun in my diet. 

"I can help in other ways, Leo," I clarify, tilting my head at him. 

"Raph, please, can we just-" he pleads, trying to grab my arm again but I step away and he stumbles a bit, still in a panic. 

"Oh, come on, I won't bite," I smile, "Much,"

"Very funny!" he fakes a laugh and reaches for me again and this time I allow him to touch me and he grabs onto my forearms, and tight, "We need to focus!" 

"Walkin' ain't a hard job, Leo, it won't take someone as fit as you to get back into the game, so, chill, will ya?" I say helping him with soft eyes, "Somethin' this simple can't possibly stop you,"

"You're just being nice because you want something from me," he states, peering up at me with those blue eyes. 

I then step forward, until we are chest to chest, "Leo, if I wanted somethin' from ya, I'd just take it. You should know this by now,"

"You're nothing but a big tease," 

"You're right about the big part, Leo, but me? A tease, never!" I smile and he rolls his eyes at me. 

"Now you just sound like, Mikey," he says, not taking his eyes off mine and I lean in, not really caring about what smart comeback he has in return. 

"He tends to rub off on me, amongst other things," I reply resting my forehead on his and he sighs at me. 

"You're impossible, you know that?" 

"Yeah, I do," I laugh, nuzzling my brother's snout, coming inches from his lips and I could practically feel his breath on my own. 

"For someone who's been trying to avoid these types of things, you sure do love pushing other people's buttons," Leo flares, touching my face and everything that I truly have been avoiding rains on top of me in realization. 

"I'm not avoidin' it," I lie, staring down at my brother who clearly doesn't believe what I just said. You could see it in his face. On top of that, I couldn't just fib to Leo. Nobody could. 

"You're avoiding it with all three of us," he cheerfully says, which surprises me, "Cade has already informed me about bloodsuckers and their impossible need for sex,"

The words of my maker fill my head, again. Like it has all the other times when I'm in the mix of being turned on and ready to do it with one of my brothers. With Mikey-- it might be different now. Donnie would be impossible, and Leo is just too damn tempting. He says that I'm a tease when he can't even walk without teasin' me. I never thought in a million years that I'd want him this badly. 

But I can't hurt him, no matter how badly I want him. 

"I do it to protect you, Leo," I coon, reaching for his cheek and lightly dragging the pad of my thumb over his skin, "You should know this,"

"I'm not afraid of you," he quickly states with attitude and I want to roll my eyes at him. 

Fearless bein' fearless, as always. At least that hasn't changed. 

"I know ya aren't. But I've had my scary moments, eh?" I grin, making that flush on his face return, "I think you like em' too," 

"Sometimes," he bites his lip then releasing it, making my groin stir, "But only sometimes. Other times you're a real pain in the ass,"

"Wanna do somethin' about it?" I mock, nudging his shoulder just gently enough to move him back an inch. 

"I wish I could, but you won't let me. Plus, you can't forget that I am kind of disabled right now," he muses, pouting up at me playfully and on instinct, as my thumb is still touching his cheek, I brush over his bottom lip, unable to tear my eyes away from it and then he blinks, asking me, "What're you waiting for, Raph?"

I then lean in for it, lightly pressing my lips to his, knowing Mikey will rave all about this later. I can't help but crave it. I couldn't help but miss the touches, everything-- I should just admit that more often. But I don't. I fought with myself twenty-four-seven about my emotions, including my desires. 

Leo was practically on his tiptoes for my mouth and I smiled into the kiss, deepening it just enough to get my tongue in, and soon, it felt like old times. When this felt forbidden. When things were far too complicated to shine a light on. When we were afraid to tell, Sensei. Soon, Leo's arms were around my neck, touching everywhere he could get his hands on and of course, the feeling-- the taste of his mouth was lighting my body up with new desires. It was electric and unbearably sweet to the touch. 

Leo's hands were slipping lower, and I began to feel this energy coursing through my veins I hadn't ever felt before. Somethin' stronger, perhaps dangerous, but good. My throat goes dry and my fingers curl at my brother's sides, digging into his skin, and in my head, something truly was tellin' me to hurt him. 

He'll like it. 

What? I quickly question inside my head, like my own thoughts were betting against me. 

Maybe they are.

My eyes pop open, my heart making an obvious thudding noise in my ears and I pull my head back from my brother and he looks at me with such disappointment and pulls at the back my neck to edge me closer again, "It's okay," he whispers, letting his soft breaths of air hit me in the face. 

"Leo," I fuss, grimacing at my dirty thoughts and he refuses to let me go and reconnects our lips. 

The images of catching Leo and Donnie together not long ago flash through my mind and I nearly laugh, but then again, I can only imagine just how desperate those two were during those final moments before we caught them red-handed. 

I gripped my brother's hips, pushing him back until he was perched on the edge of the desk that single-handedly sat in the corner of the room for no good reason at all, except the stacks of books on the sides. Leo spread his legs the best he could while being careful to not bump anything along the way-- considering he couldn't move that well. I stood between his thighs, making a careful decision that either I or him wouldn't go any further than what I had originally planned. 

"Raph, please," he begs, edging me on and I wanna give in, I wanna give him exactly what he wants, what he needs, what I know he craves, but I can't, "You won't hurt me," 

"You don't know that," I argue, moving an inch or two away from my brother, "You don't know what I'm capable of now," 

"I knew for many years what you were capable of, Raph, and that changes nothing now," he says, trying to reassure me, but I have to keep my distance. At least for now. No matter how bad it gets for me. 

His hands were at my chest again, and my brother's scent alone was intoxicating as usual and his lips on mine only made it worse, and thinking this now-- maybe a little wouldn't kill me. 

The pads on my fingers felt like they were on fire. They even burned every single time I touched my brother's skin, which made me want it even more. I kissed him eagerly, needing to taste him again. Our tongues intertwining which makes Leo moan into my mouth like never before.

I then quickly had to remind myself that we were home alone. Mikey was out helpin' Don and Cade with the usual shopping and whatnot, which left me to focus on helping Leo with his walkin' movements due to his leg-- so, why did I have a reason to worry about being caught or something? I was worried about nothin' which wasn't anything new for me. 

Our living space had become old real quick, and I've realized this for a while now. And I had a plan to fix that. It was the least I could do after all the crap I've done to my family-- to my father. 

During these thoughts, I felt Leo's hands at my belt and soon what I've been avoiding happens and my erection is standing straight up in my brother's hand and I sigh at the contact, enjoying it far too much. Leo's eyes meet mine and I quickly shut them, knowing that the adrenaline rushing through my veins is already approaching-- just like how I feared.

"Raph, look at me," he coaxes, his voice sounding hushed but low, "Please," 

Sexy.

"God, Leo," I breathe, resting the front of my head on his and finally opening my eyes, knowing that his would-be directly on mine while his lower lip is between his teeth and his hand is tightening itself around my growing shaft. 

He doesn't know the possibilities, the risks. 

"Don't look away-- don't hold back, I need you," he begs again, making my undead heart throb, if that was even possible, which it is, considering I can feel it. In fact, I didn't really know what was possible anymore. 

I tore at Leo's sweats, getting him exposed as quickly as I could, and it was obvious of his eagerness, and on top of that, he wanted something more than what I planned to give him. I couldn't bring myself to go as far as I wanted to, at least not this time. 

I brought him closer, spreading his thighs around me and bringing our cocks together with force, earning a whimper from his lips which urged me on, and I rutted against my brother, clenching my teeth at the sharp sensation in my pelvis. I watched, peering down between our writhing bodies, as Leo struggles to keep his legs open and thrusts up against me. 

His arm wrapped around my neck, and I grunted moving my own hips faster, but sayin' screw it in my head and I wrapped my fingers around our dicks, keeping them together, but thrusting my hips again, creating even more friction between the two of us and Leo began making actual moans now and it only fueled my veins more and more. 

"M-More!" he whines, letting out small breathy groans along the way and I bite down on my lip in an attempt to silence myself as I touch us both at the same time. Leo struggles to move his hips and I struggle to not touch his bad leg during this. He moans a bit louder as I move my hand, uncurling my fingers around the base of our erections then tightening again, moving quickly as I would just on myself. 

His breathing was picking up, and the pounds of his heart was thudding in my own eardrums, leaking unforgettable thoughts into my mind. The images of making sure his heart never beats again is there, the sight of his body twitching without blood, and his eyes rolling back at his final breath. 

I shoved my mouth against my brothers in the need to rid of my mind because, in moments like these, I wanted to forget about what I was now. I wanted to forget that being near my brothers were just as dangerous as before, but worse. Cade even once told me that I and Mikey wouldn't want Leo or Don's blood, but now, being as close as I am, I can smell it, I can practically taste it. 

Because what's worse than wanting to fuck and kill your mate at the same time?

"R-Raph!" he suddenly shrieks, twitching under my weight and I breathe in his scent, taking and drinking in every detail of his smell, his taste and especially his touch. 

"Leo," I purr into his ear and he groans, thriving in my hand and I squeeze just a tad tighter, feeling the pressure on my own member building up, "Fuck~"

Leo hooks his arms around my neck, bringing my mouth to his again and we kiss in what desperate need is ours and I suck on his tongue, rutting my pelvis into my hand, our cocks becoming slick in my grip, and for once, I moan into my brother's mouth, finally breaking the silence in my head and Leo pleads to me to let go, and I do, furiously stroking my hand between us as we both groan at our final release. 

My brother is panting heavily and looking up at me with lidded eyes, which makes me wanna go again, but he can barely stand let alone move at this point so I just smile at him and nuzzle his snout again, "That good enough for ya?" I question gently as he peers up at me, letting his head fall back, thudding against the wall. 

"Just about," he manages, keeping his arms around my neck, but loosely at my shoulders. 

"We have a mess to clean up, and I definitely ain't doin' it," I grin and he picks his head up to look down between us and with a near smile of his own, he nods his head and rests against me. 

"I think you'll have to because I know you won't be brave enough to walk around with that stuff on you. Especially if Mike is gonna be around us,"

"Oh, and you will? He'd totally destroy your ass now. No pun intended," I tease, taking a few tissues from the box that was luckily nearby on one of these damned tables and cleaning up the mess we made. 

"Ha, ha, ha, now help me down from here," he rolls his eyes, reaching for me again and I do as I'm told for once, and just as I do, a familiar whistle fills the room, including a smell that'll never get old. 

Cinamon with a hint of mint. 

"Mikey," I mutter and Leo tilts his head at me then turns it towards the door as our little brother greets us cheerfully which used to hurt my head, but now, I welcome it with open arms because of all the shit I've dealt with since he's been gone. 

"I guess I picked the perfect time to come in!" he jokes, flipping a quarter in between his fingers, "I kinda need to talk to you two-- well, the three of us do upstairs in the living room. We have some information on Jameson, and perhaps his location," 

"A location?" Leo questions, taking the words outta my mouth, "How did that happen?"

"Thank Mr-Know-It-All, Princeton up there-- but seriously-- D, wants us all there for what he has to talk about, so, get a move on slowpokes!" Mikey says, disappearing from the room again. 

I and Leo shared a look that left us questioning; will this really be the break we've all been waiting for?

And I had a feelin' it would be, but not the break we'll be wanting. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	28. ᴴᵃⁿᵍᵐᵃⁿ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter will have No Summary as this Chapter is apart of the five-part series I've been writing for the last week or so.
> 
> I planned to post these when all five were done, but I've decided to keep it traditional and post the first four and keep number five for later as I'm still not finished with it. 
> 
> For now, I hope you enjoy the next four, as it is a wild ride that you will both love and hate. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣⱽᴵᴵ

ᴴᵃⁿᵍᵐᵃⁿ

[ Donatello ]

Little steps, Donnie, little steps. 

I took a seat on the sofa as my siblings pilled into the room, with Raph and Leo immediately eyeing me down with their stares. I quickly began to feel a bit tense under their eyes and I put my legs up underneath me in order to feel a bit more comfortable during the next few words I planned to say. 

Cayden was standing next to me, which made me feel a little more protected than usual. I guess he too was a bit nervous about what was going to happen after we told my brother's about what we knew about the possible whereabouts of our nephew. 

"What's going on, Donnie?" asked Leo who sat next to me with the help of Raph, who didn't rip his stare away from me. 

"Well, while we were out," I took a deep breath, "We made another visit to John's place, including back at the penthouse,"

"In your condition, you went back there?" scoffed Raph, who I quickly ignored. 

"They are rebuilding the penthouse under the commands of the Mayor. And we still have yet to find Angel, and on top of that-- thanks to Mikey, John has doubled his men," I go on, not really paying attention to the way my little brother pouts at me but slouches into the chair across the room anyway. 

"I was able to get through them, but I got very little information except for a few details from your guy and even that wasn't easy. Because with my capabilities, I can't just threaten someone's life for evidence," Cade then explains, crossing his arms over his chest. 

"And why the fuck not?" Raph curses, "It has to do with the kid we promised we'd keep safe, and look at us now!"

"Chill, Raph," Leo coaxes, reaching to grab his hand that was hanging in a balled fist at his side, "He's right. We can't just threaten someone. We can never do that," 

"We have minor details to run by and the only word we were given had to do with Alaska," I say catching my brother's attention. 

"Yeah, and the only way to get to Alaska is by air," stated Mikey who decided to finally jump in.

"Alaska?" Raph came at a near snort, "The fuck is in Alaska?"

"Well, there could be many things," I say, flipping a switch on my watch that pulls up the hologram I had searched up awhile ago and on-screen was a family tree of such, "Jameson's family was born and raised in Alaska. Specifically Homer, Alaska," 

The images on the screen went into a spiral, flashing pictures of people, specifically a man and a woman and three younger-looking people who were the siblings in the family. 

"So, basically that's where you'd think, Codey may be?" Leo questioned, scooting closer to get a better look at the screen. 

"This is bullshit," Raph commented with his usual attitude while pacing back and forth. 

"It's our only lead, Raphael," Cade said, narrowing at my older brother. 

"He's a long way from home if he chose to live and work in New York. Which is odd. Have you checked for any backstory?" Leo suggests and I nod my head. 

"John mentioned to Cade that Jameson moved from Denali to Manhattan back in late twenty-fifteen in order to look for better work. John eventually met him while grabbing a coffee and couldn't say no," I explained further, spinning through a few other files I had made during the trip.

"But there's something else," Mikey announced, throwing a small rubber ball into the air then catching it while repeating the action two more times before finally speaking again, "In order for that dude to give us any information, he told Cade he'd never wanna hear from us again. That includes staying away from his daughter, amongst other things due to me nearly killing him-- oops!" he giggles, slouching in the recliner. 

"Oops?" Raph glares, "You're lucky the mother fucker didn't order a hit on us!" 

"But he didn't," Mikey playfully clarifies but glaring just as hard in return which scares me with his crimson eyes. 

I ignored their bantering that slowly filled the room and on-screen, I scrolled and scrolled until I found Jameson's headliner, which displayed his education and experience in more than a dozen careers, with a police history and background, and it surely was surprising. 

"He was arrested for kidnapping at the age of twenty-five," I say out loud, causing the banter to surely come to an immediate slow.

"What?" Leo at my side mumbled out of pure thought, and I could already feel eyes on me, 

"So, he's done this shit before?" Raph questions with a hint of shock in his voice.

"This isn't good," Cade says holding the bridge of his nose, "He has a criminal background, and by the sounds of it, John knew about it, which is why he probably hired him so quickly-- who knows what he made Jameson do in order to get the job,"

"You aren't helping" I exclaim quietly enough to make our friend seal his lips and look at me with enough emotion in his face that gave me a silent apology. 

"Can't believe this," I heard Raph speak and for once, I looked at him, but he wasn't at me. He was still pacing and I had the urge to calm him down, but I felt as worried, and as angry as him. 

"So, what's this mean, are we going to Alaska, or what?" Mikey asks, but not sounding as excited as I'm used to, which I knew entirely why. 

"We'd be catching a flight straight to Homer, and to get any more information, we'd have to speak with his father, considering he is the only parent left living," I shake my head, scrolling back to the screen beforehand and pulling up the image of Jameson's family tree again, but specifically choosing his mother's header. 

"It says she died of cancer a couple of years ago," Leo says reading the contents on the hologram, "It was just a year before he moved to Manhattan," 

"That explains something-- perhaps he had a breakdown and he couldn't bear to be around his people, his town, even his home and had to move away-- which means he had to leave his life behind," Cayden steps in, watching the screen as well until I decided to switch the hologram off. 

"Then it's final," I announce, looking up at Cayden despite the looks my brothers were already giving me, "Can you get us there?"

Cade gives me a nod, "I can fly us there," 

"You, fly us?" Raph chuckles and for once, I wanna join in, "You can't be serious,"

"If I wasn't-- I wouldn't have said anything Raphael. I don't do jokes, and I most certainly don't care for your bitter attitude towards this. Donnie and I can't do this by ourselves, and Donnie is in no shape for traveling but it's our only choice," Cade is quick to defend, making the look on Raph's face soften, but then he scowls at me. 

"Donnie already knows how bad he is. But he's choosin' to do this while he can't. I'm only bein' bitter because I don't wanna lose another brother due to some stupid mistake we fuckin' made!" he says, sounding heated but hurt. 

He was right. I was only in denial. But I so badly wanted to find our nephew. I wanted to see him again and his lovely smile that was so contagious that even Mikey couldn't believe it. My eyes found my little brother who was still playing with that ball and he soon noticed and I looked away. 

I slowly stand from the couch, following Leo's stare and then I look at Raph, taking careful steps towards him, "I know you've seen things. And so has Mikey-- there's no hiding that. In fact, we all have. And you out of us all have experienced the worst, minus Japan," I pause looking at my little brother, then back at Raph who was awaiting my finish, "But we have to find him. As you said, look at us now, look at how bad of a job we've done in keeping him safe as promised. It hurts me, and it hurts to know he's out there somewhere without us,"

The look on Raph's face had completely faltered during my words and at my side, I felt Leo's fingers wrapping around my wrist and when our eyes fell upon each other, I wanted to break down in tears, "Donnie, we didn't do a bad job. These things happen, they happen all the time!"

"Not like this," I quickly say but in a whisper, "Things that happen in our lives don't happen in everyone else's. Codey is a human baby-- he is no mutant!"

"D, we will get him back," Mikey promised, now at my other side, which surprised and helped me all at once. I don't even remember seeing him get up, but I had to remember that he too was just as different as Raph now. 

"We will do whatever it takes," Cade joins in, making his voice sound just as promising as Mikey's and I nod my head, feeling Leo's grip on my hand tighten. 

"And if things get bad, they'll get worse and we'll take care of it," Leo continues while rubbing the pad of his thumb over my knuckles in order to reassure me and I can only nod my head to avoid crying as I was suddenly feeling so vulnerable. 

Leo struggles to stand but pulls himself up anyway to pull me in for a tight hug and the embrace I had been craving for the entire day and soon, Mikey joins in too, squeezing us both to the point of where it hurt. 

It wouldn't be long until we were on the move to the airport, and not really to my surprise, Cade had his own hanger and his own plane that had his initials on the side with a creative, cursive two-letter sway that says CP.

In order for us to keep the whole thing quiet, we had to leave during the night time and when we pulled up at the gate, I silently thanked whoever created tinted windows, and then again, I sometimes wished that maybe we didn't need to hide like this, but Raph was a big enough issue to keep hush. When Cade paid the man at the gate, he got back in the car and drove us into the hanger, where we boarded the plane quietly. 

For the last hour or two, no one had said a thing since we left Manhattan, and for once, I was happy to leave New York. It felt like the air was smothering there. It being my hometown, my birthplace, I couldn't wait to get away from it. 

After getting comfortable in the large plane seat, I reach into my backpack and drown out the rest of the world for a few seconds to do something I hadn't done in a while. 

-

Journal Entry

July 27th, 2021, Tuesday - 11:18 pm

April, I miss you. 

I remember the day we met. I had no clue who you were going to be to us. At the time, being under sixteen, the only thing I could think about was getting back home so we wouldn't get in trouble with my father. I remember the look on your face and how horrified you were by the sight of us. When you passed out, and when Mikey thought you were dead. Raph didn't care, at least then. Leo was afraid that Mikey might have been right and that's why it was actually my decision to stay and check on your vitals. 

How could I forget the day you finally met Sensei? And, of course, Casey. 

I may hate him, but he's unfortunately apart of my memories too and in order to write them down, I have to include him. It's not really that big a deal but Leo nearly killed him. And believe it or not, Mikey actually wanted too as well. But we couldn't let that happen. Not after Japan. 

Which was something we didn't even get a chance to tell you about. It was an awful, yet beautiful experience for the four of us. It was-- well, it was where everything began. 

I won't go into major detail, but it was nice. Like, really nice. But then things got bad again. It got so bad that we had to break the fourth wall and kill, which was something I still have yet to do. I've been trying to avoid anger beyond that. Especially since Venus came along-- and Venus being my daughter, I regret to say that you won't be meeting her. 

I did something wild, something very odd and strange. Something that even you'd cringe at. 

And even now, I think it was a pretty stupid thing to do in the first place. But I'm happy with my decision, and so far, I think my brothers are too, considering they are partially the dads.

I could probably sit here and write many pages about what all has happened in our lives since you've been gone. Especially with Codey. With your son, you were so generous to trust us with. 

I swore I'd protect him with my life, and did, until the accident. 

We had bigger problems during the times of caring for him, and I allowed myself to let him slip my mind, I allowed myself that and I'm sorry. My brothers refuse to let me blame myself during these times, but now, we're on a plane, flying to Alaska, to get him back. 

I miss you, April, and I love you. And while you're up there, please tell my father to not hog all the pop tarts, he loved those things. 

Sincerely Yours, Donatello.

-

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	29. ᴴᵉᵃˡⁱⁿᵍ ᴴᵘʳᵗˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter will have No Summary as this Chapter is apart of the five-part series I've been writing for the last week or so.
> 
> I planned to post these when all five were done, but I've decided to keep it traditional and post the first four and keep number five for later as I'm still not finished with it. 
> 
> For now, I hope you enjoy the next four, as it is a wild ride that you will both love and hate. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣⱽᴵᴵᴵ

ᴴᵉᵃˡⁱⁿᵍ ᴴᵘʳᵗˢ

[ Leonardo ]

Another plane, and another trip I had to endure in order to go away from my home once again. 

However, I couldn't much call it home anymore. Not after everything that has happened. With me, my father, my brothers, of course, and now my nephew. I could tell how stressed Donnie was over this whole thing and I couldn't bear to see him like this, let alone vulnerable because of this damned pregnancy-- which I wasn't against. By anything means, I wasn't. I just wished we were more prepared for what was going to come soon. Donnie was only getting weaker, and now, he could barely stand let alone fight. 

Hell, I don't even think I could fight. But if I have to I will. It doesn't hurt as bad as it did a week ago, and for once, I agreed with my mutated blood. I was healing fast, but not fast enough. 

"Figured you'd be out," Raph's voice racked my brain and I glanced away from the small window that allowed me to overlook the clouds high in the sky. 

I shrugged, "I'm tired, but I don't think I'm tired enough to pass out yet," 

My brother sat beside me and huffed, "At least we'll be able to say we've been to Alaska," he snorts a laugh and I join him but keeping my voice low. 

"Yeah, but it isn't for any good means necessary," I remind him though I know he already knew, "I'm hoping we won't be here long" 

"It can't be that bad. It's just snow, fearless," he teases, and I nudge him with my elbow.

"Now can't be the time for jokes and snow isn't entirely my best type of weather, you know? You should know that both me and Don are cold-blooded," I grin at the memory of him constantly reminding me during the winter season. 

"Yeah, yeah, believe me, I know. He fell asleep about thirty minutes ago," he says, nodding towards the other row of seats that Donnie chose to sit in because of it's larger capacity to stretch his legs out when he actually decided to get sleep, which was hardly ever. 

Donnie had a white blanket draped over his figure with gray sweats and matching socks with a hoodie he's really taken a liking to. It's like he never takes it off. Probably because it's the only thing that fits him, I thought. 

"I doubt he'll sleep long" I mention to Raph and he nods again in agreement. 

"Are you excited?" he asks without meeting my eyes. 

"For what?-- oh. I don't know really," 

"What do ya mean, you don't know?" he pushes while finally looking at me, his eyes a flaming red and for a split second, I remember Cade telling me that the color in my brothers' eyes will soon be less evil, quote on quote. 

"I'm nervous, Raph, aren't you?" I'm quick to argue and he just stares until giving up and eyeing our brother again. 

"After what I've seen, sort of. But I'm mostly nervous about him. I've seen him die a thousand times in my mind because of this baby-- I've seen you all die. It hasn't been easy since this-- change," he explains, weighing his tongue on the word change. 

I can clearly feel the amount of truth behind his voice and I know how much he hates the way he is now than before. He equally hated himself before, but now, I think he genuinely missed his old self. But I didn't exactly know who Raph was before last year. I've known him my entire life and just now I've realized that I barely even knew him the way I should have years ago. I like the way things are now. But if I could change the past, I would. I would make sure that I was there when I failed to protect my father when he got shot. 

But I don't think I could have saved April.

Then again-- "Raph?" I ask out loud, knowing he'll hear me either way. 

"Hm?" he hums, resting his eyes and breathing awfully heavy. 

"Can I ask you an impossible question?" 

"Nothin' is impossible, Leo. You should know this by now-- but sure, why the heck not," he answers, still not looking at me, but when I say what I'm about to say-- I'm sure that'll change.

I slowly sat up, turning upright to face him, "What if April never met Casey?"

Sure enough, his eyes opened and he looked right at me, "If?"

"Yeah, like, what if they never met?" I shrugged.

"That would mean Codey would have never been born," he simply states, "What're ya on about?"

"You said it," I point out, "If April never met Casey-- she would never have gotten married, and gotten pregnant, therefore--" 

"Therefore we couldn't change anything about that!" he quickly interrupts and gawks at me like I'm stupid, "April died because she didn't survive childbirth, Leo. It's somethin' unavoidable, somethin' that has to do with the inevitable,"

I sigh, "Did you know it was going to happen?" 

"What-- that she was goin' ta die?" he scoffs, "You saw how I reacted-- how would I have known?"

"Your visions," I muttered, picking at my fingers, "I hadn't known when they started,"

"They started soon after we got those weapons from those homophobic assholes," 

"Homophobic Assholes?-- Oh, right," I rub my head and laugh softly, "They apologized, you know?"

"Yeah? I was there, so what?" he rolls his eyes and I nudge him again, "I still hate em' all the same, and no apology can make me change the way I feel towards em' for kickin' us out like they did. They had no right," 

"You gotta look at it from their point of view," 

"I don't gotta do anything-- they don't deserve my forgiveness," he goes on and I roll my eyes at his stubbornness. 

"We'll be seeing them again," I say feeling his eyes on me as I peer back out the window. 

"How do you figure?" he asks calmly for once. 

"Because they are practically family-- and family isn't exactly easy to come by in our life," 

"Don't remind me," he says, cutting mid-sentence to be greeted by our little brother. 

"Guys, we're getting close!" he beams, stretching over both of our laps to look out the window and I lean back, glaring at him. 

"If you hit my leg you'll be getting there early" I warn and Raph laughs at my comment. 

Mikey backs up and parks himself in Raph's lap, which seems to make him quite uncomfortable, and I probably knew why to be honest, "Look, fearless," Mikey begins while wrapping an arm around our brother's neck, "I'm sorry about the leg but those threats seem pretty airless if you catch my drift," he winks. 

"I'm not afraid of you," I wink back but more serious than sarcastically which was Mikey's permanent attitude the majority of the time. 

"Can you get off me?" Raph questions without much sincerity and Mikey pouts at him, sticking his bottom lip out while leaning down to kiss him and I can't help but want to look away but some sick part of me wants to watch and stare, or more, but for my sake, it was just one kiss that turned into many and then full-on making out and then I had to look away. 

"Get a room, the both of you!" I cringe, already feeling the blood pooling on the surface of my cheeks. 

"Don't be jelly, Leo," Mikey mutters leaning closer to me and I try to move away but the palm of his hand lands on my chest and forces me back against the flight chair. His face was getting closer and before I could say no, his lips were on mine and the taste of him, including the minty aroma from Raph, was mixed into one when he kisses me and I immediately wanted more, like something from his tongue was pulling me in. Kind of like when me and Raph fooled around. 

We were supposed to stick to psychical therapy-- but then things escalated into much more. 

The things we did that day were so very simple and teenage-ish. But it was like venom on my tongue and in my veins. The feeling was electric. More electric than the first time, than the millionth time. I was feeling completely resilient that day and somehow he broke down that wall and took me where I stood. 

I enjoyed it. 

Fuck. 

I'd have it again in a heartbeat. 

"Mikey-- you know we can't!" I pant, and he releases a small growl that goes straight into my mouth silencing me. I hadn't even noticed when he crawled into my lap but the pain in my leg that was slowly creeping up my body was the last thing on my mind and I needed more. 

"Alright, ya horndog!" Raph says pulling Mikey from my lap and I wince at the sudden rush of pain in my leg and I grab it, "You need to cut the shit and start taking this trip a lot more serious, Mikey!" 

"I am though!" he whines, not realizing how loud he actually is and I notice Donnie stir over his shoulder and the first thing he sees when he opens his eyes is me groaning over my damn leg. 

"No, ya aren't!" Raph begins, forcing Mikey to his feet, "I don't wanna have to tell you again about what could happen if you do things like that. Especially with Leo or Don," 

"The both of you, shut up!" I say glancing at Donnie who was shaking his head in my direction while pulling the duvet off of his body, revealing the bump I genuinely enjoyed seeing-- though I didn't particularly agree with it. 

"Shit, sorry, D," Mikey apologizes to Donnie who was rubbing the sleep away from his eyes and replacing them with his glasses. 

"It's fine, I was having nightmares again," he reassures but I don't buy it-- I'm sure he was dying to get some rest before all the crap that was about to happen goes down. 

"Nightmares?" Raph questions, "I thought you stopped havin' those awhile ago," 

"Well, I guess they're back!" Donnie shrugs with a smug grin and slowly stands, but struggles.

It took Mikey five seconds to realize and he was by his side, helping him. I felt like absolute shit for not reacting the way he does. I despised myself for being so selfish, but I blamed the thing inside of him, Girl or not, for why my mate was so sick. 

The memories from the vision Cade gave me just from one touch flood my mind for the millionth time since it happened. I, of course, admired the way she moved, yet again. I didn't have a problem admitting to it. But it struck fear within me because of how much she mimicked me. 

How she mimicked us all with one stare and two eyes. Very blue eyes. Like mine, like Mike's, like an angel she was. And she was mine. My angel. My daughter--

"Leo!" Raph shoves and I blink, furrowing my brow at him and he points out the window, "Looks like we're finally here," 

"Yeah," was all I could say before pulling the seatbelt over my lap and clasping the end to the other which makes a slight click noise when I fasten the belt and I tell Raph to do the same but he refuses and prefers that he doesn't need to. 

Mikey and Donnie are in their own seats with belts on and I'm relieved at the slightest when I feel the plane begin to shake. I take a quick look outside the window and notice we were nowhere near an airstrip. 

"Raph," I mutter without question and he hums again as if nothing was happening, "I thought you said we were here?" 

"I did, because--" he says then pauses mid-sentence which freezes him solid, like a statue as he stares forward, into nothing and I feel panic surge through me like a wave. 

The door to the cockpit opens and Cayden appears, but stomping his way down the aisle like some giant. He looks angry-- angry and worried. His face was pained with concern as he reaches Donnie and Mikey's seat. 

"We have a very big problem," he gulps, repetitively running his hand through his hair. 

Donnie peers at him, "Problem?" he asks just as the plane shakes again and I begin to wonder if we were on auto-pilot or just nothing at all, which meant no one was flying this bird. 

Raph chooses that now was the best time to come back to reality and stands immediately, "What the fuck is going on!" he roars at our friend but Cade doesn't flinch, "You said you knew how to pilot a goddamn plane!" 

I try to stand after unclasping my seat belt and holding on to the headrest of the seat in front of me and move forward, but keeping my movements slow, "Who's even flying this thing?" I can't avoid asking, but of course, I get ignored over the volume of my brother's voice. 

"Raphael, I gave you my word. I've piloted this exact plane half a dozen times-- but there has been a mistake, and we are more than twenty-seven thousand feet in the air," Cade tries to explain which gives me the vibe that Raph saw something he shouldn't have. 

"What are you talking about, Cade, what mistake?" Donnie cooly asks him as the plane shakes so hard that I fall against the wall, but with what strength I know I can hold, I grab the seat again for leverage only to be greeted with yet another bump. 

Cade looks at the four of us with fear. Not for himself, I'm sure, but the ones who he knew wouldn't survive this crash if it came to that. Which it wouldn't. Right?

"There really isn't time to explain, we need to get the hell off of the jet!" he half yells, making Mikey rise to his feet, eyes dark with curiosity. 

"Fuckin' spill it!" Raph growls, but once again, Cade doesn't react and lowers his head with a loud sigh and nods. 

"The entire flight for the last eight hours has been clear, but when I looked at our fuel levels, they had completely dropped from the number it was supposed to be. Which was held at one-hundred thousand, and now, it's at a fifth of its gallon, which is life-threatening above I'd say ninety percent," he explains then swallows. 

"So, we're gonna crash?" Mikey practically squeaks, "Fuck, dude, this is like brazil all over again!" 

"It will be nothing like that!" I announce, "We need to focus on the parachutes, and there are parachutes, right?" 

Cayden nods again and quickly leaves to get them and is back within a few seconds, holding three in his hands, and I gawk anxiously at him but try not to worry, "We need to get you and Donatello strapped in and ready to jump, we should be crossing over fifteen thousand feet by now and we are luckily not surpassing any mountains or glaciers,"

"Don't put one on me," I say, staring at Donnie who obviously wasn't prepared for this. He was weak of course but still coherent. 

"You can't be serious, you won't make that jump, your leg is broken, Leo!" Raph shouts and I ignore him, stretching my arm out to push the parachute back into Cade's hands. 

"I've handled worse and I've got my shell," I try to smile, "What would we be without em' huh?"

"Now ain't the time for fuckin' jokes, put the damn chute on!" he demands and I narrow at him. 

"I said, no!" I finally yell, "I will be fine, I'm more worried about Donnie!"

"Now isn't the time for fighting-- or bickering or any of this nonsense that I've had to put up with for the past few months! Donatello, I want you in a chute, if Leonardo thinks he can handle the drop, then I trust him at that. Fuck, I'd trust you all to not wear a chute, but I can't take the risk right now, so just do what you have to do and prepare fast, we have to get the hell out of here!" Cade exclaims, sliding his arms through the straps of the chute and buckling it. 

Donnie does the same, Raph doesn't bother and Mikey sheepishly takes the third one even though I doubt he'd need it. But I trusted him, especially after what he is now, I guess. 

I looked at Raph as he was near the door, and he looked back, giving me an expression of, are you sure? And I nodded my head at him and he grabbed the latch that kept the door sealed and let it go and the plane door slid open making a loud noise as the air began to suck everything inside forward due to the shift of gravity. 

"Can't believe we're doing this again!" Mikey said over the open door, "It'd be a lot better if I had my board!" 

"Why didn't you bring it then?" I can't help but ask and he shrugs and scowls towards our friend. 

"I didn't think I'd need it!" Mikey shrugged again and jumped out the door making me tense up but I quickly shake it and look at Donatello as he was preparing himself to go too.

"This shouldn't be happening-" he says, "It feels too casual, however, set up,"

"Raphael, when you jump, I want you to take Donatello with you, it might be a little better for the both of you since you're uh, bigger? But yeah, I'll explain everything once we're grounded!" Cade gives a thumbs up, and jumps, leaving the three of us alone and my stomach feels like it's gonna turn. 

Why did I feel so anxious, or nervous? I even felt a little light-headed. 

"You two better get going," I say to my brothers and they look at me like I'm crazy. 

"You're going next," said Raph and I shake my head. 

"Stop arguing with me and just go!" I huff, frustrated as my head began to hurt, "I'll be right behind you," 

"You better be, this is ridiculous," he complains, taking Donnie by the hand and he gives me one last look before I reassure them that I will follow. 

Once their gone, the plane was beginning to tilt and shake even more than before. I began to make my move and grab the seats for leverage again, and once I'm at the very edge of the plane near the door, I'm able to see out into the clouds and the slow approach of the mountains. My vision was a little cloudy and my worry grew. I quickly looked down, and the bandages around my thigh were soaking through with blood and I was immediately confused. 

I thought Cade took care of that? How am I bleeding? 

I blinked, squeezing my eyes shut and opening them again and that's when I fell out, feeling extremely dizzy as the wind whipped around my body. I saw the plane above me moving and disappearing from sight. 

I had to fight this, in fact I was trying to. 

"Leo!" 

I heard the shouts of my siblings, but I couldn't make out who or what was saying things. My ears were ringing from the fall and climate change. I felt as if I was going farther and farther away from home, and soon, the last thing I saw was the pale sky above me, moving-- falling- and disappearing in the clouds that swallowed every inch of blue in its wake. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	30. ᴮᵉˡᵒʷ Zᵉʳᵒ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter will have No Summary as this Chapter is apart of the five-part series I've been writing for the last week or so.
> 
> I planned to post these when all five were done, but I've decided to keep it traditional and post the first four and keep number five for later as I'm still not finished with it. 
> 
> For now, I hope you enjoy the next four, as it is a wild ride that you will both love and hate. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣᴵˣ

ᴮᵉˡᵒʷ Zᵉʳᵒ

[ Raphael ]

Leo. 

Fuck, Leo!

The only thing I could see was him fallin' from the sky-- he wasn't even awake. He didn't look good before we jumped. I knew I shouldn't have left him. But he's so fuckin' stubborn. Always tryin' to be the good guy- the hero, the smart one! The goddamn leader!

"Stay fuckin' put!" I demand Mikey and he only pouts at me again with less and less fear in his eyes, but I couldn't bear to argue with anyone anymore. 

"You need to calm down," Cade gently coaxes while removing the straps from his shoulders. 

The bastard. 

"Calm down?" I repeat, taking only but two steps and I'm in his face, my feet buried in the snow, "You want me to calm down after what just happened!" 

"If you don't you'll end up hurting someone!" he snaps, "We will find him!" 

I shake my head furiously and look out, seeing nothing but snow and fucking fog for miles, "He could be dead because of you!" 

"Raphael, I swear on my life I didn't know this was going to happen!" Cade defends, throwing his hands up, "I checked every single valve before we left the airport, I always do because I don't trust people!"

"I don't care about this right now, the only thing I'm seein' is my brother falling from the fuckin' sky and disappearin' from goddamn sight!" I scream, kicking the snow and I feel a hand on me, and for a moment I'd of thunk it was Cade again trying to calm me down, but no. The touch was much warmer than his than Mikey's. 

"If I know Leo, which I do," Donnie sighs, shaking under the cold weather that I didn't even think about until now. He must be freezin' out here, "He'd survive,"

"I know, Donnie, I know, but-- I gotta find him, and you need to get somewhere warm, which I'm sure jackass over there will take care of!" I retort, narrowing my eyes at Cayden again and he ignores me, dusting himself off. 

"Luckily we're about three miles out from Homer, and I'm sure from either my phone or Donatello's watch we'll be there in no less than an hour if he's on my back," Cade says, and I look at him and almost laugh at the thought of Donnie on his back despite the situation. 

"Donnie on your back, bro?" Mikey giggles, and points at him.

"I-I have to agree with Mike on this one," Donnie shivers, "I'm much larger than you, Cayden,"

"Yes, you are, but only in height. I'm six-foot-four, and you're what, an eight? So, by only four inches you are taller than me," Cade states matter-of-factically and then he continues, "Plus, there is something that the four of you need to realize here, I'm over a century old, and someday you will be too, I'm stronger than the both of you combined, but you can be stronger if you start accepting who you are now. Your abilities are undiscovered, and now really isn't the time, but it will all come clear one day-- but for now, realize that you, Raphael and Michelangelo are untouchable, and those who dare hurt the ones you love, will never stand in your way again," 

Cayden finishes off with walking away and removing his coat, revealing the crisp, white buttoned-up shirt underneath and he quickly drapes it over Donnie who surprisingly fits into it well. For once I wanted to say that Cade was right, though I hated him, I was grateful for many things he's taught me and even gave me. Without him, I'm sure we'd be without a home and Mikey wouldn't be standing right here in front of me. 

"Fine, fine-- Mikey, you got your phone on you, right?" I ask him and he gives me a quick nod while wiggling it between his three fingers, "Alright, we need to get moving-- and you need to get him out of this weather, it's bad for him," 

"Don't worry about us, I'll give you a call or text if we need you-- that's if there is signal out there, but be careful anyway," Cade says just before he signal's Don to hop on his back, and my brother hesitates at first, but I knew he was thinking about there being no other way and possibly suggesting that he could walk, but with Cade's speed, he'd be outta this shit in no time. 

Once situated, Cade doesn't seem to struggle one bit with my brother on him, and from an angle, they both look odd like that, but I couldn't bother with it. We needed to get going and worry less about how weird things look. 

"Come on, Mikey," I command with less anger in my voice than what I'm originally hoping for. 

The snow was behind me once we were on the move. The air was cold, but it didn't bother me. In fact, my toes were numb at this point and even that didn't seem to bother me. Mikey was at my side the deeper we went into the blistering glaciers. The ice wasn't far from either of us and I could feel it at the tips of my fingers, digging into my skin with its sting and I clenched my fists. 

"You see anything?" my brother asks me, and I shake my head, holding my arm up high enough to block the shards of ice falling from the sky that threatened to go into my eyes. 

"I see and hear nothing-- the only thing I'm pickin' up is some sort of stench," 

"Is it, Leo?" Mikey questions again, moving closer to me as I finally come to a stop, peeling my eyes over the distance between us and the road ahead, and it was still light out. I'd say it was about five in the afternoon and the sun was just now setting in front just behind the snowy mountains. 

"No," I inhale, "I know his smell. It's some other kind of animal. Maybe a wolf, or bear," 

We started moving again, but I feared that if we went any further and if it got too dark we'd be caught in the middle of nowhere, which we basically were-- but I didn't wanna lose my route and get lost out here.

"Raph, I'm getting worried," Mikey says at my side and I could agree. I was too. 

"Just a little more, okay? And uh, then we'll head on back. We gotta keep tryin' Mike," I push, taking Mikey's hand in mine, leading him through the snow and up ahead, I saw something-- I smelt something much stronger than a wolf, or animal. It was familiar but way too strong to be anything I could guess offhand due to the change in my body. 

I strangely felt right and wrong about this. The smell was blood, and I could see the stains of a dark red color in the snow. My throat began to burn and I could practically feel the tension in the way Mikey gripped my hand and the way he hissed and covered his snout before we moved any further. I finally released myself from Mikey as my eyes fixed on a very specific piece of fabric on the ground. 

"R-Raph," Mikey stammered, taking a step back as the smell got stronger the closer I moved. 

In the snow, under this damned misty night sky-- I saw the blue faded pieces of fabric that originally resigned on Leo's face, and for a moment, I could see him. I could see his eyes, the way they shine when he looks up at me, and the way they would darken all because we were in one of our stupid bickerments again. 

Blood. 

I picked up the mask, it's pieces barely holding together in my fist and I felt the need to cry-- to sob out to the world and tell it that I hate it for hating me. I was tired of losin' people. I was dead already when Mikey left me, but how much more dead can I possibly get when I lose the only person who's as equal as me? 

"Hello?" Mikey said into his phone and my head snapped in his direction, my body practically vibrating at the undeniable thoughts swarming in my mind, "Yeah, is everything okay?-- But it's only been two hours-- Yeah, here," he said to me, handing over the phone and I just stared at it in his hand, as his obnoxiously orange phone case sticks out to me more than I should have let it, but I take the phone only seconds after the words were spoken and hold it up to my head and on the other end, I could hear a shaky breath, or maybe a scream or two. 

Fuck. 

"Raphael?" Cade questions on the other end and for a fuckin' second, I forget how to speak. 

"Yeah, what's going on?" I finally managed to ask, still gripping the piece of fabric in my fist. 

"I'm gonna need you and Michelangelo back here immediately!" 

"Why? We're still--" I spoke, but what came on the other end of the phone was spine chilling to hear. Out came a scream, then another. They didn't sound normal, nothing like I've ever heard, but I knew them by heart. 

Donnie?

"It's Donatello, he's--" Cade began, but being cut off by another screech, "He's gone into labor," 

I nearly drop Mikey's phone as he stares up at me, eyes widening because he too heard what I heard and the look of horror overtakes my body and I look down at Leo's mask in my hand then at the phone. 

I couldn't even think for myself-- and I knew then that this was it.

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	31. ᴴᵃᵛᵒᶜ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Thirty carries off from Leo's point of view, waking up in the snowy blizzard of Alaska, but finding himself completely riddled with confusion as he has forgotten his name, his life and even the path to speak.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣ

ᴴᵃᵛᵒᶜ

**[ Leonardo ]**

White fluffy snow and wind so sharp that it could surely cut you into. I saw the clouds, the sky-- then squeezed my eyes shut, fluttering my vision like a blind man. I didn't feel anything or _maybe_ I did and I just couldn't quite make it out.

_How did I get here? Or the better question was, where even was I?_

"I think he's wakin' up, Pa," said the whispers of a voice I didn't know. Though they sounded awfully young for their age. 

"Stay back, it could be dangerous!" the older warned and my eyes fluttered at the shuffling noises around me and finally, the light above me pierced through my eyelids and I squinted, realizing that I was for sure outside, but somewhere far, and in the cold. 

My mind felt scattered as if only bits and pieces were there shaking me to my core. I gained enough stability and opened my eyes the rest of the way while slowly becoming accustomed to the bright light above me and when I did, I saw a man and a boy. 

The salt and pepper color in the man's beard gave away his age, including the wrinkles all over his face, but his eyes didn't throw me off as someone who was older. They both looked scared, horrified even. 

"Are you alright?" the little one asked me and I wanted to answer, but there was a catch in my throat that I couldn't seem to pass no matter how hard I tried, and the fuzziness in my mind didn't help much. I didn't have the slightest clue who these people were, and they looked more afraid than I felt. 

I felt the snow melting away under my body heat, or what's left of it and I slowly sat up, swallowing a hard whimper that soon escaped my throat as a sharp pain traveled from my back to my stomach, and all the way down to my leg giving me the feeling of pins and needles.

I rose my hands, unable to see my lower half due to the blanket of snow covering my legs and when I went to wipe it off, the color of my skin completely caught me off guard. I looked down at my palms, spreading my fingers out which looked completely abnormal. The three, long but thick digits stood and stretched out a lot longer than the man and boy's hands obviously did and I couldn't quite understand. 

The emerald-colored scales traveling up my forearms, all the way to my shoulders made me squint my eyes again in far-out confusion and etched into my skin, I noticed some sort of other pattern. _Or patterns._ These were no scales though, they were more like art with black ink. The shapes and swirls in my skin reminded me of some sort of painting or it was perhaps family related. 

Looking down again after cleaning the snow off of myself, I saw the bloodied bandages on my left thigh and wondered briefly if my confusion could get any worse at this point, but I knew it _wouldn't_ be getting any better if I didn't get answers. And answers was definitely something I needed right now because I didn't think I was supposed to be green. 

I finally peered up at the young man and there wasn't anything but shock in his eyes and I slowly held up my hand, giving him a look of, _I won't hurt you._

He looked up at the older man, "We should help him, Pa,"

The man was obviously skeptical, and I understood from the way I probably looked, but I did need help, and me sitting out here in the cold would get me absolutely nowhere, considering I didn't even know _where_ was. 

"Alright, fine, let's get you up first," the older suggested and I nodded at him, still feeling a little fuzzy upstairs, but confused beyond belief as I still couldn't form a sentence. 

The older man took hold of my left arm while the little one did my right and with a pull and some help from myself, I got to my feet, surprising myself as I saw the two toes attached to my body and I shook my head, looking at my hands again but clenching my fists with the amount of pain traveling up my leg and hip. 

I released a hiss and the boy let go and stepped away from me in a panic as he thought that the noise I made was because of him. And his father, or, grandfather-- assured him that what he thought wasn't the case at all. My fingers were shaking again and soon I felt my body collapsing from the inside and out and my vision began to fade, and the amount of swimming in my head had finally won the battle between me and my consciousness. 

**Later** , much later, I'm assuming because the sky is dark now, I opened my eyes again, but this time they feel much, much heavier. But the pain in my back, in my side or maybe my ribs had disappeared. 

The air didn't feel cold anymore, but once the mist from eyes had finally cleared I saw a fan above me, rotating around and around with dark, oak ceilings surrounding it. I could feel the panic already bubbling in my stomach because if I didn't know where I was before, I definitely didn't know now. 

I sat up, letting my spine rest on the pillows behind me or, uh, whatever that was on my back that weighed a freaking ton. I peered around the room, taking in every detail and realizing that this wasn't just any other bedroom I'd think I'd have ever seen as it was pretty fancy. I saw no dust for miles and every table and even the blankets that heavily weighed on my legs were brown or some type of dark oak. 

I quickly threw the blankets off of me and saw that the bandages around my leg were now clean and without blood and tears. _Maybe I broke my leg in an accident? Or someone did this to me?_

I winced moving my right leg over the edge of the bed, then the next but being extra careful once my feet were on the hardwood floor. I held my fists on the edge of the mattress forcing myself to stand and to my surprise, I don't feel any pain in my leg this time, but the soreness was there. I could feel it as if my body was covered in bruises. 

Once standing up straight and testing my limits, I noticed the shorts on myself that lingered just a few inches above my knees and my thoughts immediately swam again, as if my brain were trying to connect the dots to some game or memory. The shorts reminded me of what the NBA players wear for their basketball games. 

In the dim lighting of the room, I could easily see a mirror hanging above the dresser that was tucked away into the corner of this overly sized bedroom and in the mirror, I saw the silhouetted figure of myself.

I moved forward, sliding my feet across the floor, allowing myself to get used to the feeling again along with my weight. I held my breath for even a moment as I moved, getting closer to the mirror, making my appearance become less and less of a mystery. 

Once in front of it, I could see the scales again, but they weren't just on my hands, arms or shoulders, they were everywhere and in the front of my body, embracing my stomach and all the way to my chest, I could see the protective plates that felt soft to the touch, but tough and rock solid. And on my back, I slowly turned to the side and saw the patterns there, here and all over the place. My eyes were wide at the view, but blue. So very blue like the ocean. 

More markings etched into my skin littered my upper arms, and even the shell. _My shell._

 _"Turtle?"_ the words left my mouth before I could even think about them. My hands were over my mouth, covering my lips to seal them and my eyes were even wider than before. 

That's when a knock is sounded at the door to my left and I nearly fall over, but I steady myself on the dresser, still in shock. The door opens before I can even say anything and in the archway, a dark-haired woman is there, holding a silver tray full of items that could only be food, 

"Oh, you're up," she says and I gawk at her as she kind of stands there awkwardly and then she clears her throat, placing the tray on the made side of the bed and then positions her hands behind her back, "You're a lot bigger than what my father made you out to be," 

I wanted to speak. I wanted to greet her maybe or ask the same questions that's been gnawing at me since I woke up in that snowstorm. I had to decide quickly on my next move, or else I was gonna drown us both in the awkward silence that slowly began to fill the room. 

I outstretched my hand and her eyes flashed at it for a second as she was obviously debating to shake my hand and once again, I could see why as my appearance was just to the right of me in the mirror, mocking my cowardliness. 

But then, she surprised me, stretching her own arm out and sliding our fingers together in a strong grip, "I apologize, I've just never seen anything like you. My father mentioned that you can't seem to talk and that maybe it was apart of your injuries, but my name is Lillian. Lillian Anderson," 

Her grip was a lot stronger than I anticipated and I released her hand a little too soon than I originally had planned and she looked at me almost pained but then I opened my mouth, trying to form words, "S-Sorry," was all I could say and she stares at me, analyzing my face I was sure, but she was surprised that I spoke. 

"That's alright, do you have a name?" she asks and I furrow my brows together in confusion. 

_A name? My name._

I then shake my head at her for an answer and she nods, gesturing towards the silver platter that I could smell from here, "My father instructed me to feed you antibiotics, which is there, with a glass of water and juice. He also suggested that you were starving and that I should fix you more than just a measly sandwich, so, I hope you like lasagna," she smiles, and the amount of appreciation that filled my core was overwhelming right now. 

I wanted to say thank you, or even say no thank you, and that she'd need it more than me. 

But I couldn't. I felt the underlying need to be polite to people. I even felt shy-- or just unwelcome wherever I went. I didn't think it was normal, but maybe it was just the way I used to be creeping up on me. I didn't really have a clue. 

**After** that, an entire day went by before I saw another person except for Lillian. She brought me food whenever she was ordered to at least, which I didn't like. I didn't enjoy the idea of someone ordering this nice lady around only to benefit me when she should be feeding herself, or more or less, worrying about her needs and not mine. 

I still hadn't found answers. My name was a mystery-- my entire life seemed to be as well. And my appearance as an amphibian was just downright crazy-- did I used to be human? Maybe I was some sort of experiment gone wrong--

My brain was still scattered like broken pieces of glass. And as the days went by the more frustrated I was becoming with the progress. 

"You don't remember anything?" asked the old man who I now knew as Felix, and the little boy was Andy who was very much into comic books. 

"No," I answered, staring down at my lap again. 

"Well, whatever happened, the fall must have been fairly great for you because the wound in your leg had reopened itself upon impact. The bleeding had already started way before the fall because of an infection. Which then started in the bone but wasn't properly treated due to the lack of medication," Felix had explained, making me think a lot more than it should have, but here lately it seems that all I ever do is think, "You're lucky we found you when we did, son," 

_Son._

The word rang so many bells, but those bells ringing in my mind awoken nothing but dust and particles. I grieved for the answers, but they never came. 

"You still haven't told me where I am," I reminded Felix and I watched as the glasses on his face slip down the slope of his nose and he readjusts them, which yet again, reminds me of something I can't quite place. 

"Oh, right, well, it has been nearly a week since we pulled you out of the blizzard, but right now, um, you're in Homer," he nods, writing something down in a little notepad. 

"Homer?" I repeated after him, as the word too seemed familiar. 

"Yes," he chuckles, "Homer, Alaska, west of the borderline glaciers, but we're pretty close to Denali, and perhaps Sitka," 

"I'm in Alaska?" I question further, feeling awfully stupid, but _Alaska? Why the hell was I in Alaska in the first place?_

"From the sounds of it, son, you're suffering from a really bad case of memory loss," Felix says, and I finally meet his eyes which look as concerned as I'm feeling right about now, "The fall is definitely what caused it and from that leg and the impact, it might have been from the plane," 

"Plane?" I asked, as chopped up pieces of debris falling from the sky and trees surrounding me flood my mind. I could see a stream of water and an explosion. I blinked until the memory was gone and I tried to focus on the words coming from the man in front of me. 

"Yeah, there was a plane that crashed about two days after we found you. I was surprised you were alive, but, I'm glad we got you out of there," 

I looked around the room for the millionth time, searching for anything but here. I felt an ache in my chest as if something was desperately missing in there and my grief and confusion were only growing larger and larger by the minute. 

"Look, try not to worry-- you aren't necessarily my first patient who I've seen over the last thirty years with amnesia," he assures, closing the tiny notepad. 

"How long does it last?" I question again, unable to stop myself. 

"No doctor really has the answer to that, son. But, sometimes it really depends on the type of amnesia to the heat injuries you endured. However, if I could give you an answer, it could be up to a month, or maybe even life long before you remember anything that happened before, but it is possible to regain it, so don't think it isn't," he sighs, "I can only imagine how frustrating it is to wake up, not know your name, where the hell you're at or where ya were before, but please, for my sake, don't lose hope," 

**Hours** dragged by before my next conversation, which ended up being with Lillian again. But when we talked, she seemed to only care about asking me questions about my life before, and about why I can't remember anything at all. 

"I'm glad you enjoyed the supper," she says, leaving me at the dining table alone which left me to admire all the paintings on the wall of the late painters I knew too well, but none really felt like home to me. The house was quiet, and since I've been here, I haven't been outside or asked really any questions about these people's lives let alone my own. 

But just as I was about to excuse myself for the night, the front door swung open and a black-haired lady wearing leather high heeled boots stomped in, and when her eyes spotted me, it's like the expression from her face was not only fear or sadness but complete relief. 

"Leonardo!" she practically screamed. 

I looked at her confused, as Lillian ran back into the room at the commotion and the sound that left her mouth sounded of excitement. 

"Karai!" she squeaked, wrapping her arms around this Asian woman who loves yelling out random names at strangers, especially ones who aren't human. But then it hit me--

_Karai. Or Cry. They both sounded the same._

As I looked at this woman, her eyes never left mine, and when I saw her swinging a bloodied sword in my mind, my instant need was to tackle her. Or better yet, _kill her._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	32. ᴺⁱᵍʰᵗᵐᵃʳᵉˢ ᴿᵉⁱᵐᵃᵍⁱⁿᵉᵈ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Thirty One takes place in the exact same spot one week before Chapter Thirty where we continue straight from Donatello's point of view, and back into the madness where fights and many messy situations are solved and one beautiful moment as Venus is finally introduced to the world.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣ|

ᴺⁱᵍʰᵗᵐᵃʳᵉˢ ᴿᵉⁱᵐᵃᵍⁱⁿᵉᵈ

**[ Donatello ]**

**/** This Chapter Takes Place One Week Before Chapter Thirty **\**

The only thing in my mind was where _my_ Leo was. I wanted him here more than anyone, and on top of that, I was worried about his safety when I should be worrying about my own. 

It had been an hour since things fell into place at such an unexpected and horrible time. I wasn't having any contractions which was a good thing-- but I knew it wouldn't be long until I had my third set of them. I could still hear Cayden on the phone with my brothers and in the back of my mind, I hoped and prayed that they found Leo. 

"They'll be here any minute now," he assured me but I paid no attention as I was concentrating on my breathing and the amount of wet spots I was creating on the sheets beneath me. 

In and out, I sucked in a breath of air, realizing that this wasn't helping at all and I rose to my feet, sucking in a second breath while caressing my plastron and pacing across the dark wood floors that was all over this cabin as such. Though it didn't look much like a cabin, it was very big and spacious and the windows were wide, tall and very open from the ground to the ceiling that stretched until a point, overlooking the snowy mountains. 

"You gotta tell me what I can do, Donatello," Cade asks me again for probably the third time since this all started, and I honestly didn't know what to tell him. He sounded just as worried as me, but overall nervous as this was going to be his first time ever witnessing someone giving birth. _If that was even going to happen._

"I don't know, I don't know!" I groaned, feeling my heart hammering in my chest and sweat already forming on the surface of my skin. I removed my glasses and the purple ribbons that were wrapped around different parts of my body, including my mask that I didn't really mind removing as sometimes it was really annoying, to begin with. 

I was feeling very uncomfortable and the issues kept stacking up like plates and the only thing I cared about was if Leo was okay-- _I needed him._

Just then, my brothers barged into the room, carrying droplets of dusty snow with them at their feet and the look on Raph's face was unbearably obvious and my knees nearly buckled. 

"Where is he?" I croaked, my voice cracking and Raph shook his head at me, his eyes filling with emotion and in his hand, he stretched it out, allowing me to see the blue fabric that I knew as well as my own.

"We couldn't find him, Donnie, we only found this, and--" he pauses, gripping the fabric in his hand, "H-His blood," 

"No," the words fell from my mouth in a whimper and Cade was at my side, grabbing my arm and preventing me from falling and so was Mikey, but his face was just as disappointed and filled with emotion as my eldest brothers' was. 

"We haven't confirmed that he's dead, so, don't even go into your over thinkin' stage just yet--" 

I cut Raph off and narrowed at him, "I fucking want him here!" 

His face went from soft to completely surprised at my outburst, "And ya think I don't? You don't think I ain't worried about him, Donatello! I'm worried fuckin' sick and then Cade calls me, tellin' me you--"

"Shut up, Raphael, you aren't helping!" Cade warns him off and I harshly shove them off and away from me as I turn around and walk a few steps, gaining some sort of distance. 

"We heard you screaming," Mikey said from behind me, "You scared me half to death, D!"

"He was having contractions. He's had two since you've been gone, and he won't tell me what I need to do to make him more comfortable," Cade sighs in defeat, but frustrated. 

They were talking as if I wasn't here. I felt so stupid, I felt like the biggest ass in the world because that's what everyone thought of me. The genius. April always said this to me when she would spend most of her time in my lab-- that I missed very, very much. We would sit and talk about the endless possibilities of life and science. She even came to me when she and Casey wasn't getting along-- which I see now as one of the biggest red flags I've ever seen in my life. 

_She should be here._

My father should be here. _Sensei,_ God, how I miss you!

"Donnie, how are we gonna do this?" Raph questions now at my side and I looked up at him, my mind running in circles at this point, and for some reason, my body wasn't allowing me to think. 

"I-I don't think I can do it here," I answered honestly while placing another hand over my stomach, "This shouldn't even be happening-- I've got at least another two months!"

"What do ya mean you can't do it here?" 

I swallow, my mouth tasting extremely dry, "I mean, I don't think I'm fully prepared for this!"

"But we can help with that, just tell me what to do and I will make it happen!" Cade assures me again, though this time I knew he truly meant it. 

"The lair!" I grunted, digging my fingers into the flesh of my plastron and I nearly fall again as a surge of pain courses through my stomach, sending shock waves up my spine and down my legs. Raph grabs me this time and whispers something into my ear, but I can't make it out. 

"You know the lair is destroyed, Donnie!" Mikey points out as Raph lowers me on the mattress again. 

"It was the only place where I was comfortable!" I croaked again, rolling over onto my side, and curling my toes into the sheets. 

"He's right," Raph agrees, "It's the only place where he'd of wanted this to happen. His equipment and everything was there,"

"We'll need an incubation thingy," Mikey says as he parks himself on the other side of the bed, petting the back of my carapace, "And a pool," 

"A pool?" Raph repeats and I groan again, knowing what Mikey is talking about. 

The memories flood my head, throwing me back to all the moments me and my little brother shared over the egg-- over _Venus._

He was more excited over it than Leo and Raph and if my father were here, even he would join them in disappointment. Mikey was the only one who surrounded me with the love, and support I truly needed. He sucked in every detail and always enjoyed the topic, the information and even the preparation I had told him about if things like this were to ever happen and look, it _did._

It truly surprised me. It threw me off when he'd ask me specific questions like _does she eat everything I do_ Or, _can the baby hear you when you're doing things like sex._

It made me laugh every single time because deep down I knew he truly was only asking to lighten the mood when he knew I was upset over the way the others treated the situation. Even now, I still felt that Leo didn't approve and the same goes for my oldest brother, even though he's grown to it. I could clearly tell that it excited him. But, I knew about the things he's seen in his own mind and I wouldn't blame him for not supporting my decisions that I never included him or Leo in when I should have from the start. 

"Yeah, a pool, like one of those kids pools," Mikey continues, making my thoughts even more tasteful than before. 

"Is that what he wants, a water birth?" Cade questions and I wanna giggle at his confusion but the details I know he's lacking he will soon learn. He's unbelievably smart, and that's something my brother's don't really know about because they don't care to. 

"Not exactly-- um," Mikey stammers, thinking for a moment, "No water in the pool, but sand," 

"Oh!" Cade comes to a near shriek, "I'll be back," 

"Where the hell do ya think you're going?" Raph goes after Cade, but by the time the words are out, he's gone, sending a shiver down my spine with the cold wind he leaves behind. My brother curses under his breath but returns at my side anyway. 

"If being here is such a problem for you, Raph, then you can go!" I say to him and he looks at me, clearly pissed off with my words that I fired at him. 

"I do wanna be here, what makes ya think I don't?" 

"Don't play dumb with me!" I shoot at him, hissing at the pain in my pelvis, "You and Leo have hated this from the start, you always have! The both of you would always talk about it when you thought I wasn't listening-- like on the plane, I heard the conversation!" 

His expression changed again and he fights to look at me but immediately rips his eyes away and silently denies any involvement, "Donnie, I never fuckin' hated this, I just didn't wanna lose you!" 

Mikey takes my hand in his and sighs at the commotion, "Is now really the time to be doing this guys?" 

"Yes, because I'm sick and tired of those two walking around, whispering about me, like what I did was so disgusting and freakish! Look at us, Raphael! We _are_ the freaks!" I yell, feeling my heart thud in my ears and my blood pressure rises to a boiling point and Mikey squeezes my hand again.

"Enough of this shit!" Raph screams, and Mikey glares at him creating even more unwanted tension that I already regret starting in the first place, "I never fuckin' said I hated you for this or her! And most importantly it wasn't me who despised this whole thing-- it was ya precious Leonardo!" he spat, making me look away as my lip began to quiver. 

_No crying Donnie._

"I want you out of here," I muttered at a near sob, the tears in my eyes brimming at the edges, threatening to spill over and Mikey was the first to notice and squeezed my hand tighter. 

"What?" Raph asked, lowering his voice to a whisper, "You don't mean that,"

"I think he does, Raph," Mikey says sternly and I saw the look in his eyes. It wasn't the look I knew, but I did know that Raph wouldn't leave no matter how much I yelled. 

"Fuck off, I'm not leaving!" my brother shouts and the tears in my eyes spill down my cheeks and I can't walk away this time. I can't avoid him, or anyone. 

"Shut up, dude!" Mikey yells at him and I feel Mikey's hand on my cheek, caressing my face but I try to pull away and hide, but my bloating stomach proves that I'm not allowed to do that. 

The other half of the bed dips down and Raph was over me in seconds, lifting my head up to look at him and I tried to shake myself from his grip but he wasn't giving up, "I wanna be here for this, and ya can't force me out of it, so, stop fightin' me, Don,"

"No more fighting please," Mikey begs, and I frown at his words. 

"I'm sorry" I finally said, my voice still faltering in a whisper as the pain in my abdomen disappears yet again. 

"Don't," Raph sighs and pushes his mouth to the center of my forehead, "I should be the one apologizin' for most of the shit I've done to the both of yous, and Mikey already knows this, but I am. I should have been more invested in this. I mean, it's my kid too," 

"And mine," Mikey points out, being the wise-smart-ass he is, "Don't forget that it's mine too," he nods with a great big smile while still keeping a strong grip on my hand and I don't let go. 

"And Leo's," I can't help but say and my eyes fall to Raph's again, his face more neutral. 

"We will find him, Donnie, we will," my brother attempts to promise and I know we will. He's out there somewhere and only something bad has happened for him to not have returned so soon. 

The thought only brought more worry to my mind and right now, I had to lock it away with the rest of my thoughts and focus on the now. I had to, or else I'd never get through this. Though Leo not being with me right now was my main burden, I knew that he was safe, but hurting-- badly. I could feel it and so could my brothers. 

I nodded my head at Raph and leaned up, giving him a small kiss, then another and during this, I intertwined my and Mikey's fingers and brought his hand close to my stomach, placing it there. I dragged my fingers along the surface of his skin, enjoying it, suddenly fiending for more. 

It was a really bad time and my contractions were coming and going with the hour, but having my brothers near me seemed to make them vanish as fast as they came and soon, I was comfortable enough to relax and close my eyes. 

I felt a pair of lips at my neck, nipping, and scrapping their way down and I bit my lip, inhaling deeply at the electricity shooting up and down my body, making me curl my toes again but this time it was good, it was painless. 

_I needed this. I really needed it._

I needed it more than I'd like to admit, but I needed them. I needed to feel the closeness that I've been missing since Codey went missing-- since the penthouse burnt down. Since the lair exploded. April's death, my father. It's all I ever thought about and even now, I was thinking about it. 

_Christ, my water broke and **now** I was thinking about sex. _

Someone else out there had to of understood the science behind it. I didn't need to explain it. And I sure as hell didn't need to be ashamed for it. 

"Text, Cade," I said to my brothers, not speaking to specifically one, but to both of them as I rested my head in the pillows beneath me. 

"For what?" asked Mikey with a confused expression, "Do you need something else?" 

"I don't think that's the case, Mike," Raph chuckles into my neck and my eyes are only but a flutter as I stare up at the ceiling and Raph was right. He already knew. God, how he knew I didn't know, nor did I care. 

My little brother looks at the both of us, but then a shade of pink forms on the apples of his cheeks and for even a moment, I was glad that he was still able to look as cute as he did before when he got embarrassed over the silliest things. 

"I don't think it's safe to do that," Mikey simply said, looking down at me and then at our brother, as if he was pleading at him. 

"It isn't," Raph agreed, nuzzling his beak against mine and I puckered my lips at him with a light churr that slipped out seconds later, "But I don't think I can turn it down this time," 

"You've been at my throat the entire week about how dangerous sex is with Donnie and Leo. What has suddenly changed your mind about it now?" Mikey says out of demand, but Raph ignores him and kisses me again, lighting a flame that's deep within my lower abdomen. 

"Just shut up about that, Don needs us, and we need him," Raph tells Mikey as he crawls up to my side again, but this time, replacing Raph's mouth with his own, darting his tongue between my lips and licking all around, exploring like he's never before.

"I'll let Cade know to not cockblock us in the meantime," Raph announces before climbing out of bed to use Mikey's phone again and during the call, he loosened his pants in front of me. 

_"Mike~"_ I gasped as my little brother palmed between my legs, making my thighs shut instinctively due to the amount of sensitivity down there. 

"Come on, D, let me in," Mikey whispered, licking a stripe up my cheek and churring in my ear. 

I don't remember getting naked, but I was. I could see my discarded pajamas near the edge of the bed and I just guessed my eyes had been closed way too long for me to notice Raph taking them off. 

"Cade said he'd be back a little later than expected since he now knows that you don't need him, but he said when he does, he'll bring what was needed with the whole birth and everything" Raph explained throwing off his own gear, which landed in a pool on the floor around his feet. 

Mikey soon undressed himself as well, leaving the room a complete mess that I wanted to laugh at, but I was too strung up in the current situation to care about my perfectionism of order or cleanliness. They both were close in a matter of seconds. Touching me, fondling me, making me ache with pleasure and need that I grieved for, for too long. 

"This can't be the first threesome, right?" Mikey giggles into my ear, wrapping a hand around my member that was throbbing painfully between my legs and standing it straight up, raking his fingers down the girth, making me whine out. 

"I don't know, Mikey-- but if this were to be, then it's happenin' tonight," Raph says, sounding so sure of himself. 

I lifted my hips up at the increasing speed that happened to be coming from Mikey's hand and I groaned louder at their plea and to the right of me, I heard a growl and felt another hand kneading into my hip bone, lifting me higher, coming skin to skin. Raph slid his hand lower, searching for anything on my body to touch and I couldn't help but beg silently in my mind for the real _fuckening_ as Mikey called it to come already. 

Mikey laid down, taking me by the hand and pulling me on top of him and I knew what he wanted, which was what Raph normally gave him, but right now, I didn't mind, even if I have topped before in the past. I sat snug between his legs, connecting our lips again and kissing him with passion and desperation. 

"Donnie, are ya sure you're able to handle this right now?" Raph questions me and I answer with lifting my tail up and showing him just how much I can handle and he gives me an approving growl and stands himself upon his knees behind me. 

"Just this once, I want no questions," I say as Mikey nips his teeth at my throat, coating my skin in freshly given marks that I crave oh, so _badly._

I didn't need them worrying-- I didn't even care if they hurt me. I wanted to be exhausted, but exhausted from the pain and memories I wished to rid of. The familiar demons that haunt me over the stress and lies that constantly hang over my head were disappearing the longer my brothers touched me. I just needed this for the rest of the night, and maybe some rest without a single interruption. 

"Deeper, Donnie!" called Mikey and I ground my hips into him, filling him to the brim of my cock that was swelling fast inside of his heated, tight womb. 

"Raph!" I hissed at my brother's brutal pace, him filling me again and again which made me rut much quicker into Mikey without even trying and I groaned at the burn, the opening that crept up my back, and crawling over my skin.

"Don," he panted, kneading my hips again and biting at the back of my neck as I fucked my little brother, swearing under my breath and groaning at the insane amount of pleasure that made me feel completely animalistic.

I managed to get Mikey's leg over my shoulder and I was moving harder with the snap of Raph's thrusts and I groaned, and loud, followed by Mikey with his delicious sounds and Raph's grunts, I was feeling close, so very close. 

"D, cum in me!" Mikey demanded with another feminine-like whine and I churred, feeling the familiar bubbling in my groin as we fucked in sync, "D-Donnie!" he moaned, jerking himself to completion. 

"Do it, Donnie, do it, cum in your little brother," said Raph with his dirty tongue in my ear, bending over me and laying most of his weight on my shell. My face was hot, boiling hot and Raph licked at the side of my neck again, his tongue warm and wet against my skin, "Do it, Donnie, or else you won't get _my_ load," 

_"R-Raph, ah~!"_ I practically cried, leaning back and keeping my grip on Mikey's leg over my shoulder as my shell connected with my brother's chest and my arm reached back, wrapping around his neck and I felt it, it was there, and his words only pushed it further along with the pleasure and noises echoing all around the room. 

Raph's hands slid to my front, touching my stomach, caressing me in ways I thought I'd never get and my heart continued to pound in my chest until my orgasm bloomed like a flower and I came with the loudest release I think I've ever had. Relief washed over my face and down my body like hot water from a faucet and my heart slowed and so did breathing when I felt my brother finish along with me. 

It was dirty-- very dirty and so beyond inappropriate of myself, but I loved it. I loved every second of it because it was exactly what I needed. And the only thing I needed was them. 

**[ Raphael ]**

**Three** days. Three whole days with Donnie and his sudden burst and need for attention. Me and Mikey never let up on him until he went out, and by out, I mean asleep. Us bein' near him seems to keep him out of harm with his own thoughts including the pain. 

Mikey managed to fall right asleep though I didn't feel the need to close my eyes right now. Donnie was nesting as he explained, and this can happen but I feel as if it was some sort of excuse to cover up the cry of help he's silently been givin' me and my brother. 

The bruises that littered his skin disgusted me. I couldn't keep doin' these kinds of things without showing any sort of pre-caution or self-control. I haven't even been thinking of the possibilities of what I've been doing to him while he's under the stage he's been in since day one. Donatello was a lot more vulnerable and weak than we thought, but not weak enough for things that ended him up hurt, and not only because of me, but the other little monster in the room that was snorin' loud enough to break the fourth wall. 

Cade returned to the cabin on and off since this all began and when I told him the truth of what's been going on, he didn't really say anything except gave me the same look he always gave me when this type of subject came up, and clearly he was surprised that I'd even take advantage of my brother at such a time, but I didn't think of it like that. He needed me, and Leo needed me too, but I knew he was safe. I never feared losin' someone as strong as him, but worry _was_ there. 

_It was infinite._

It haunted me every single time I closed my eyes. His blood in the snow and the way it smelt. The scent was strong-- so very strong that I could barely control myself, but my thoughts blocked what I truly wanted to do. The only thing I wanted was to see and know if he was alright. Those who know me will also know that I and Leo were the ones that never got along and it was me pointing out the obvious by sayin' that, but those literal moments were honestly some of my favorites, and I couldn't walk around and just deny that. 

It was the simple things that used to bring me joy from the look on his stupid face. He'd always act so smug when we sparred off. When we fought like animals for dominance in front of Sensei. 

It was all to impress him. To make him a proud father, to become the favorite. Which he was and we all knew it even when Splinter did give us his divided attention, though I never fuckin' wanted it, when I should have. Because now--

I squint my eyes at the dark ceiling and crawl out of bed, but being careful not to wake my brothers. Donnie had shifted in his sleep the moment he found the empty spot next to him which seemed to be his favorite, wrapped around me. I loved it. _Fuck,_ did I love it. But I didn't love seein' the marks I put on him. I didn't enjoy the thought of hurting someone every single time I needed a quick fix or just maybe from time to time, be romantic or some shit. 

They were all over his neck, arms and even around his stomach. And it was that that worried me most. The whole pregnancy-- water breaking thing was so confusing and I've been worried the entire time of when Don was gonna pop. Neither of us knew when, or how. But Cade and Mikey seemed to be the only ones prepared for this. I didn't even know what the hell I was doin' and Mikey _did._ The wheels sure have turned in this family since the first birth of a family member. 

Codey's small face swept through my mind and I couldn't help but frown at the memory. He looked just like April in so many goddamn ways that it hurt, and on top of that, he had some of his father's features. _The bastard._

"What're you doing up, Raphie?" Mikey's cool, but quiet tone alerted me a little too soon, but he thankfully saved me from dangerous thoughts. 

"I can't sleep," I lied. But only half of it was true. 

I was standin' by one of these large ass windows that overlooked the mountains and that small town a few blocks south. I hadn't even bothered to put any clothes on from my last encounter, and I wondered for a second of why I even gave a shit about that. It was a sudden need to be polite or something-- and I felt as if that was just Leo's mind workin' into my head. 

"I don't think you even tried," he giggles quietly and I could tell without looking down at him he was biting his lip while holding back a huge grin. His arm slipped around my torso and pulled my front to face him and this time I actually did look down at him and sure enough, he was smilin' and it was always so damn contagious. 

"I've got too much on my mind," 

Mikey's eyes scanned my face and he reached up, running the pad of his thumb over my scarred features, "I know. It's Donnie's markings," 

"How-" I trail off but then shake my head, "Yeah, that's it," 

"I don't think it's best of you to beat yourself up about it," he sighs, allowing his fingers to dry circles around my plastron. 

"You did it too," I reminded him and his frown only deepens, "It's wrong of us. We could have hurt the egg or somethin' Mikey" 

"Venus is fine, Raphael," Mikey assures me, but I don't want to believe him, my ego was pounding at the walls in my head, "Plus, Donnie freakin' needed what we gave him, dude, and you know it!"

"Yes, I do," I agree, looking over at Donatello sprawled out in the bed we now called our own. The blankets he hogged were now tangled around his long legs, curving and shaping his features to perfection along with his bloating stomach, which made him look so innocently beautiful. 

"So, then why do you feel so guilty?" Mikey's reddening eyes that were slowly fading into a burning orange was staring up at me again when I finally turned my gaze from my pregnant brother. 

"I didn't wanna hurt anybody else and I knew I would-- we would if we ever did that," I confess. 

"You can't just hold that worry in your mind forever," Mikey scolds me and I tilt my head at him, "Yes, we could have hurt, D, but he wanted it. In fact, he probably wanted us to hurt him, not in the bad sorta way-- but the marks, he won't mind them. As long as you don't roll over on him in your sleep, he should be fine," he grins and I swat his ass, immediately bringing him closer. 

"I could never do that, I'm too aware of my surroundings now," I correct him and he hums with sarcasm lacing his voice. 

"Uh-huh, there ain't nothing like sleeping in bed, when moby dick rolls over on ya! That egg will pop like a balloon," he winks and my lips open in a gasp and he bursts into laughter. 

"You're a little--"

From the bed, we're interrupted to a faint groan and my eyes are immediately trained towards our genius brother who was squirming on top of the bedsheets and on the white bedding I saw blood. A large spot of blood and some other type of fluid was there. It was in the air and the change of amusement to thick tension was impossible to miss. The smell filled my nose and Mikey took a step closer, tilting his head at the sight. 

"Is he?" Mikey trailed off, negotiating with his thoughts on what's happening but I knew. 

I surprisingly knew. 

Donatello's water didn't break all those days ago, but he _did_ leak. He showed us proof because there was blood in it. But not this much. Not half of this much. _Was there even supposed to be blood?_

Donnie released a whine of discomfort and this time, he was clutching his stomach with both hands and curling them inwards towards his skin, "R-Raph," he groans out for me and my heart swells in my chest and I'm there, by his side, trying to avoid the smell of blood that was already wavering around the room. 

I grasp his hand, bringing it close my chest, "Mikey-- I need ya to go and get Cade," I tell him without looking in his direction and there's silence on the other side of the room as Donnie releases a cry as he's fully awake now. 

"I-It's really h-happening this time!" he breathes on clenched teeth, sucking in another breath through his nose and gripping my hand. 

"I know, Don, I know-- Mikey go and get--" I almost yell, looking towards my little brother and when I set eyes on him, the color in his eyes are no longer a fading orange color-- but they are red. A very deep red, and the way he's staring at Donnie nearly fuckin' frightens me. His fists were clenched at his sides, and he was as stiff as a boulder. I immediately let go of Donnie's hand and jumped in front of the bed, landing on my feet with the loudest thud against the hardwood floors, "Mike, I know what you're thinkin' and you need to listen to me,"

He stays quiet, his eyes are fixed on the sight over my shoulder, unblinking and for a moment, his snout twitches, smelling the air, "Get out of my way" he sneers as Donnie cries again, and this time it's a lot louder than the last one, he was preparing for his first contraction. 

I never thought I'd see my little brother like this. He looked alien, and all too different in the face. His eyes weren't the baby blues that I remember and I knew that looking at him now was the thing the others saw me as for such a long time before I realized how much of an asshole I was. 

Just then, Cade bursts through the door and that's when Mikey launches himself at me, taking his chance and attempting to jump over my head but I grab him by the waist as he thrashes against me, kicking his knees and bucking so violently that it's a blur. The blows don't hurt like I kind of thought they would, but he's moving quickly and Mikey is quite small like he's always been. 

"You gotta get him outta here!" I yell to Cade and he nods fast, ignoring the throws of Mikey's punches and grabs him straight by the throat and drags him out of the room.

"The sandpit is prepared for Donatello, I will keep Michelangelo tamed, for now, so just focus on him, Raphael," Cade says after he's disappeared with my little brother and I listen. I actually listen for once and swallow the massive lump in my throat. 

_Fuck, this is it! We're gonna do this! We're havin' a baby!_

"Alright, Don, we gotta get ya downstairs," I say this and he growls at me, shaking his head as fast as he is breathing in and out. He was going to bed stubborn even though he knew what we had to do. _Shit, I wish Leo was here._

"C-Can't!" he tenses at my approach and I roll my eyes dramatically and slip my arms underneath him, one bicep under his shell and the other under his legs and he growls again, clenching his teeth at me and I ignore him and his attempts to push me away which fail loosely in his favor and he groans at being moved and I could understand why- but he can't just give birth in bed. It would one, be too messy and two, he's still a reptile and it would be, un-animal-like of him. 

God, I was even startin' to sound like him. In fact, I could definitely say I sounded like all of my brothers now. Sometimes I even reminded myself of my father and honestly-- I _didn't_ care. 

"Let go of me, I need to fucking walk!" Donnie curses at me while clawing his fingernails into my shoulder.

"Language, Donatello," I boop his beak with mine, nuzzling him until I feel him calm under my touch as the first contraction had vanished, though soon to return again. 

He sighs heavily, breathing calmly against me and I felt his hand on the back of my neck, pulling me in for a kiss that I needed to stop walking to include myself in and I did. I stood there, holding my brother in my arms, kissing him until he gasps again, clamping his hand over his stomach and I continued my journey, carefully climbing down the basement stairs and I could immediately feel the lukewarm room temperature hitting me in the face like a ton of bricks. 

Once we're downstairs, I see the pool that Cade has prepared for us with the help of Mikey and his information that I still didn't bother learning about, which I was punching myself for, but it didn't matter now. None of that did. I was here. And that's the only thing that _should_ matter.

Inside the small pool that ironically had smiling cartoon turtles with sunglasses on had a very lightly colored sand that looked so thin, it would evaporate between your fingers in it. I placed Donatello right in the middle and he immediately began to make himself comfortable but whined when the spot just wasn't right. I thought about this for a minute, but just before I could finish it, Mikey strolls down the staircase, closing the door in behind him and he looks at me with a reassuring expression when he notices me stepping in front of Donnie to protect him. 

"I'm okay-- I went a little wacky before, but I'm okay-- I promise," he smiles, though looking nervous as he peers at Donnie when I move out of the way. 

I move closer, watching as my younger brother struggles in the sand and my thought from earlier continues and I bite the inside of my cheek as I step into the sandpit, letting my toes sink in and I sit right behind Donnie and he leans back, allowing relief to flood his face and he sighs, wiggling his feet and hips a little deeper into the sand but just enough to put on a show to basically signal that it's time to start pushing. 

During this, I wonder briefly where Cade is and as if on cue he trots down the stairs at lightning speed, holding a stack of towels in his arms and a bucket of water. He doesn't say a word and places them next to the pit and I feel Donnie's heart pounding in his body and I coo in his ear gently enough to hope that it calms him down and he starts to focus more on his breathing again and he spreads his legs again, but wider this time and I gulp, wrapping my arms around him. 

_I was nervous again, why?_

"Alright, Donatello, I'm gonna give you a shot for the pain," Cade announces as he flicks a long pointy needle with his middle finger and Donnie writhes, sweat already gathering on his forehead. 

"I-I'll just burn i-it off, no!" he groans, leaning forward as if the pressure I'm providing for him is too much, "H-Have to do this n-naturally, _ah~!"_

Donnie's sobs were honestly overwhelming and not in the good type of way. I wanted to rid him of this pain, but I knew deep down that it would be over one way or another eventually. 

"Are you sure you don't wann--" Cade begins but Donnie shouts a _no_ and he's definitely pushing again. His entire body is tensing up against me and his face is twisting and contorting in such a painful-looking way. 

Mikey pours some water from the bucket into the sand and creates a small pocket for Donnie just below his tail and he's relieved when the cool, wet sand touches his skin and he feels obligated to push again and he yelps through clenched teeth and I kiss the back of his neck, peppering his damp skin with smooches. 

"Come on, D, we're all ready for you!" Mikey cheers like it's some sort of goddamn race but the encouragement seems to help Donnie relax and give himself another go. 

The air thickens again as I smell blood like I did up in the bedroom and Donnie is gasping for air as he pushes, again and again, which lasts nearly an hour before any progress. I felt the emotional tension in the air and I felt Donnie fall weak again me and he was sobbing again. 

"Donatello," I whisper to him and he lets his head fall back on to my shoulder and he's panting trying to catch his breath, "I know you're holdin' back-- I miss him too," and the moment the words leave my mouth, he releases another sob and I hold him tightly as Cade and Mikey watch with raw emotion in the eyes and I feel my own tears burning at the edges and I try to blink them away, "We can do this, we can get through this, fuck, Don, you're the strongest person I know, and you've handled so much worse, you can do this, for Leo," 

Donnie lifts his head at my words and he grabs my hands, squeezing them tightly and cries out again, lifting his hips into the air and curling his toes into the now thickening sand from the water. I see how Mikey's facial expression changes and the hugest smile stretches across his face.

"I-I think I see it!" he squeaks excitedly and I smile to myself as Mikey climbs into the pit, bending down on his knees between Donnie's legs and to the left, Cade is eagerly waiting but looking so out of place that I almost don't believe he's there, but he is, he's here with us, waiting with a towel in his hands and dealing with all of our bullshit. 

I feel my own heart pounding in my chest as the clock ticks down, "Come on, Donnie, you're doin' so fuckin' good!" I encourage again, swirling the pads of my thumbs around his hands and he only grips them tighter in return. 

Mikey is leaning down a little more in the sand, "There, it's crowning-- one more! Holy shit, dudes!" he says and with one more final push and grip of Donnie nearly ripping the skin off of my knuckles, in Mikey's hands, the egg drops down, being a lot bigger than I expected and I nearly gasp. 

_It's fuckin' beautiful. How could an egg be beautiful? I truly didn't know the answer._

Donnie slumps against me, watching with lidded eyes as Mikey hands the egg to Cade, being careful and as gently as possible, I watch possessively as he cleans it. 

"Let me see it," Donnie mutters so quietly I barely hear him and I help him sit up a little better and Mikey smiles so big that I think his face is gonna split into and when he and Cade lift up the egg again, a smile forms on Donnie's lips. The egg is a beautiful pearly white and looks to weigh about twenty pounds but probably not even that. I knew that once Donnie recovered, he'd be all over the results. He'd make sure of it every single day and we'd be right there with him. 

_Every single step of the way._

I couldn't stop staring at the egg as if it was staring right back with its glow and then the realization washed over me for the first time in three days--

I was a fuckin' dad. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd honestly like to pat myself on the back for this one. I worked super fuckin' hard on this chapter and it took me three days and one break to complete. 
> 
> It clocks up to seven thousand characters and is packed full with juicy content that you all have been waiting for! (probably not) but regardless of the wait, it's here and there's much, much more to come and I'm honestly excited for you guys to see it. 
> 
> I'm proud of this one, so, yay me! ENJOY!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	33. Sʰᵃᵖᵉˢ ᴬⁿᵈ ᴸᵉᵗᵗᵉʳˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back in Leo's point of view, he's having dreams about someone he doesn't know and the amnesia continues to deepen when he finds out he's been lied to.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣ||

Sʰᵃᵖᵉˢ ᴬⁿᵈ ᴸᵉᵗᵗᵉʳˢ

**[ Leonardo ]**

Small droplets of rain fell into a pond inches from my feet. The colorful fish swimming around in the water would sometimes peek up at me and jump out, nearly missing the edge to splash me. 

The air was crisp but windy and the heat was only just enough to stay warm underneath the kimono draped over my body that I still couldn't seem to figure out. 

And now, _dreams._

The patterns on the lengthy silk fabric only brought broken pieces to my mind again. The colors, they felt familiar. Hundreds of blue colors littered the surface in swirly decor that led to them to stems of flowers. It was breathtaking compared to the actual texture of my skin. 

I then looked up, seeing a man, at least it looked like a man, but short. He was very short. 

The view behind his silhouetted body gave away the beauty of Japan. It made it all seem so very real and when I saw the falling cherry blossom petals, I also saw blood. A brutal battle of blood, and in my hand, specifically my right, was a blade, but no ordinary blade. A _katana_ and its end was sharp and shiny. 

Around its handle, were the same colors as the patterns on my sleeves, but darker. The heavier blue resembled something strong and mighty and at the ends, dangled a chainlink yin and yang bead. It mocked the same color pattern, except for the blade. It wore something different. _Blood._

It was painted with the substance all the way to the fine edge, dripping ever so slightly and I could smell it, but my mind held no memory of why-- or how I held this magnificent piece in my very hand, curling and uncurling my fingers around its hilt, feeling the fabricated tsukaito. 

My eyes wandered up, following the trail of koi fish, the beating in my chest getting heavier and I saw the man again, but it was no man this time, it was-- a _rat?_

He held a perfect, concentrated stare but he was neutral. In fact, the rat even looked happy. 

_A rat. He was a **rat.**_

In his own hand was a stick of some kind. It was wrapped at each end with the same type of fabric I mentioned earlier on, but he didn't look like much of a fighter, so maybe it was something to help him walk? He did look pretty aged from the gray in his fur. But with a better look, he too was wearing a kimono, but black and yellow and on the front upper left shoulder of the sleeve, I saw a logo. The _same_ logo that was etched into my skin. 

My lips parted in a gasp, but no sound was released. I knew my eyes could have been very wide, but the smell in the air alone had me suffocating at the least. This had to of been some sort of cruel, horrible joke. _It had to of been. None of this was real._

"Kneel,"

The words were spoken and my legs were following at short demand and I wasn't even listening nor did I want to or did I understand why I was automatically following such orders from this creature. My knees bent and hit the concrete floor, my hand still wrapped around this mysterious blade that dripped blood and I peered only inches above me, and this creature, this man, or, _rat--_ He was here, he was right in front of me. 

Our eyes meet, and his, I felt it, they saw right into my soul, telling me things I couldn't put together. He removed one hand from the stick he once balanced himself on, stretching it long in front of me, as if he was waiting for something-- maybe my _reaction._

"Leonardo," he had said, forcing my eyes to flick back down towards the blade, the sun reflecting brightly off the sharper edge and just at the top, carved into the steel, I saw the very name. It was calling for me, _he_ was calling for me. 

Even in my dreams, I had complete strangers telling me that I _had_ to remember. 

The droplets of blood raining from the sky coated my skin and in front of me, the rat was no more than just a figment of my imagination, and the name everyone kept calling me, was nothing but an echo in my mind. _Just another distant memory._

The world faded around me, disappearing into a puff of black smoke and soon, I was being pulled back into a reality I couldn't wrap my finger around. 

**I** rose up, sweating from head to toe and when I looked at the clock, it was only seven in the morning here in this house I was growing tired of. I threw the blankets off of me to gain some sort of air to reduce the heat in this room. It was smothering me. I wanted to leave. But every single time I brought myself to getting up and actually doing it, I find myself more confused than before. I had no idea how I got here, except for the plane. I wasn't even familiar with the area, so that wasn't going to be smart on my end and on top of that, my body didn't enjoy the cold. 

I rested the back of my hand flat on my forehead, feeling my skin that was damp with sweat. I blinked away the sleep from my eyes, including the memory I had just encountered. I then climbed out of bed, figuring that it was early enough to make a head start for breakfast. 

My leg was no longer giving me trouble and Felix, aka, Professor Anderson, was amazed with my progress. It had only been a couple of days since the accident and I was already fully healed by ninety percent. He wanted to explore more of my blood and DNA, but it wasn't a good time. Over the actual time, I have spent living amongst this place, I've noticed shaking in my hands. They trembled and shook, but my chest continued to ache without reason. _That I knew of._

In the kitchen, I opened the fridge and took out a bottle of water, some juice, eggs and grabbed two bananas from the fruit basket. While frying the eggs like Lillian showed me I threw in some salt and pepper and peeled the bananas to eat separately while the eggs fried. 

I decided to cut them into small pieces this time and when I grabbed the long kitchen knife from the drawer, I didn't notice that my hand had stopped shaking and during this, I stopped moving altogether, staring widely at the knife in my hand. I used this knife two days ago, and I wondered again if this happened already. _Did I stop shaking without noticing it?_

I shook the thought from my head, unable to bear the drilling silence in the room except for the popping of the frying pan. I took the knife handle, holding it steady and carefully chopping the pieces of fruit quite slow at first, but then my wrist naturally got faster. The muscles in my arm twitched and the fruit was chopped into small nonexistent little pieces and I was out of breath without realizing it. 

I took a step back as a smile crept across my face. I then looked at the knife again then back at the fruit basket. I even ignored the burning eggs in the frying pan and picked up a lemon, bouncing it off my hand and cutting it directly in half and perfectly in the middle and a laugh erupts from my throat, feeling the spike of adrenaline in my veins. 

My dreams were far behind me, and things kept coming to me in pieces, but this had to of been the most fun I've ever had since the very beginning of the accident. 

I was having so much fun making a mess, I didn't even notice the presence in the room, watching the show all go down. I was balancing the knife at the tip of my finger as I grabbed an apple from the basket and without taking my eyes off of it, I threw it into the air, spinning around at the edge of my heel and throwing the knife, pining the fruit against the wall. 

I gawked at the sight with pure surprise and a little bit of excitement.

_Did I really just do that?_

Then, from the doorway, I heard clapping and I swallowed heavily as the sudden rush of embarrassment was clear on my face and in front of me, I saw the woman who I knew as Karai. 

"You're as talented as I remember," she smiles, dark hair falling into her eyes. 

I shook my head, quickly removing the knife and apple from the wall and realizing the mess I've made, "I-I'm terribly sorry, I just-" 

"Don't apologize for it, Leo, but you might wanna cut the stove off. I'd rather not burn down my sister's house," she assures while taking a seat at the small dining table. 

"Sister?" I asked, not knowing why but I did as I turned off the stove eye, releasing a disappointing sigh over my now burnt eggs. 

"Half-Sister," Karai corrects me, having something dark in her eyes as she stared at me, "I've known her long before I married my husband,*

"Oh," I let the word slip out in only a whisper, "Marriage," 

"You've met him," she states, still staring at me as I clean up, "But it had been long ago, but not too long of course,"

"How long ago?" I was quick to ask, finally meeting her gaze but then sweeping up the rest of the food on the floor with a dustpan. 

"April and Casey's Wedding," she says with an even bigger smile like she's remembering something beautiful. 

Once again, she was mentioning more things like everyone else was _that_ felt familiar, but wasn't. I knew that everything in my head was nothing but a freaking memory at this point. 

I took my place at the table straight across from her, "I know it's been difficult for you. Especially since that plane crash, but we're still trying to find your brothers. I didn't even know you guys were here," 

_Brothers._

My eyes landed on the ink in my arm and the swimming shapes of turtles only told stories that echoed in my mind. I had brothers, and that just answered the possibilities of me being the only one of my kind. But then again, my dream last night told me otherwise. 

As my mind drifted for the hundredth time since I woke up, another stranger comes in from the front door, holding a child at his hip. Karai immediately rose to her feet and went into the living area to greet this man who looked young enough to be in his late thirties, but the child, he only looked about one year old. 

The hair that framed his small face was dark brown with blond at the roots and his eyes were sterling blue that completed his tan features. The child was the first one to spot me from the door and his gaze was hooked as he reached out towards me, catching the man's attention who was holding him and when he saw me, I could see the sheer panic on his face. He then turned pale, taking a step back from Karai who looked towards me, then back at this stranger, waving her hand in the air. 

"Oh, James, I'm sorry about that," she apologizes, sincerely and then clears her throat, "I want to introduc--" 

"I know who he is!" the man exclaimed, fear in his voice, "I know what he and those slimeballs are too, and they aren't getting Codey back!" 

I looked at Karai confused, but then back at the child-- Codey and he was still reaching for me, struggling in James' grip. 

"What're you talking about, Jameson?" she questions as Lillian enters the room, carrying along her father inches at the back of her heels. I paid no mind but could hear a faint, _what's going on._

I couldn't take my eyes off of the little boy. His hands were reaching and grabbing for the air. My body practically gravitated towards him and before I knew it, I was standing inches from the man as he tried to go back out the door and the shouting in the room was nothing compared to the thoughts racing in my head. 

I slammed my fist into the wood behind his head and his eyes widened at me, "Give me the child," I demanded, surprising myself and not being able to keep up with my own words or actions. They were moving on their own and so was my emotions. 

"Can someone tell me what the hell is going on!" Karai shouts, taking the child from James and panic flashes on his face as he tries to reach for him but I block him, "How do you know, Leo, and most importantly what about Codey-- you said you adopted him from an unstable family!"

"I did!" the man shouts, "These turtles, these things-- I knew them back in New York, and this child, the boy-- I saw the things he had to be around, I saw the danger and I had to get him out of there! Codey Jones is _mine_ now!"

I took a step back, watching his face as he spoke these words about me, about-- _them._

Even Karai seemed surprised, "Jones?" she questions, bouncing the small child in her arms, "As in, Casey Jones?-- Christ, James, you didn't!" 

"Didn't what?" Lillian says walking in the middle of me and this idiot.

"Everyone needs to calm down, especially you, Leonardo," Felix warns, noticing the change of my body temperature, "As for you James, my own flesh and blood-- You obviously haven't been the same since you left here-- you left your own son behind and now, what? You've kidnapped a baby that isn't even yours!"

"You are all wrong!" he shouts, making my blood boil and I nearly tumble over with anger at the sight of this disgusting prick that supposedly knew me and my brothers. _That I apparently had._

"Karai would never lie to us, Jameson! You've done this before and blamed all of your crap on someone else, it's why your brother does not come around anymore and you know it!" Felix is quick to defend, marking this guy's place in front of his entire family. 

"I bet he isn't even taking his medication!" Lillian accuses while pointing a freshly manicured finger at him. 

I slowly stepped further back, letting my eyes fall back towards Codey, "Let me have him," I muttered, but my voice was clear, "Now," 

"No!" Jameson shrieked, launching himself at me but Felix stepped in his way, "You can't possibly think it's a good idea to give him back to those freaks! It's why I came here, It's why I left them in that awful place!" 

Karai moves towards me and slips the child into my arms and the moment he touches me, he clings to my arm for dear life, "I'm sorry" I whispered to him but he didn't let up. 

"I'm calling Doctor Watson and this time, I'll make sure that you don't get out!" Felix says to his son in a near shout. 

I zone out from their shouting but Karai takes a company into paying attention to me more than these people who were basically related to her. For the next ten seconds, I shut my mind off and pay no attention to no one else except for the small child in my arms. 

"All of you, enough!" my so-called friend shouts, "You," she points at James who was cowering against the front door, "You will never see this child again,"

I slowly turn, holding Codey at my chest and I walk away needing to be far from the drama, this house, this place. I was grieving for the truth. It was two weeks, two whole weeks since the accident. 

The commotion was dimming out in the background and I finally made the decision I should have made ages ago, but I felt like something wasn't right here. It wasn't anything I've ever felt. 

"Take me to them," I blurted out, not caring who or what heard me, "And if you don't, I'll leave and find them myself. I'm tired of this game that I know you're trying to play with me,"

"What game, Leonardo?" Felix questions putting a hand on my shoulder and I shrug him off, carefully putting Codey on the couch. 

"You people have kept me here for weeks without telling me anything about what happened! And all I am to you is some test subject you can break down bit by bit, but I'm not. There are others like me and you are keeping me from them!" I clench my bare fists at my sides, trying to control my inner anger and I heard Felix sigh. 

"He's right," Lillian says, sounding much sadder than she usually does, "We've been isolating him, like a caged animal," 

I stood there, unable to believe that they even agreed with me, let alone listen. These people's intentions weren't bad. But their family had history and I wanted far away from it, very far. 

"Karai, would you please give, Leonardo his things?" Felix says, standing up straight.

I looked at her, my eyes following with shock as she gives him a short nod before leaving the room and returning with something that looked to be covered by some blanket. The object beneath it stretched largely in her arms and when she reached me, she came to a near bow. 

I reached for the blanket and ripped it off, and underneath revealed two katana blades that looked exactly like the one from my dream. My lips popped open and I grabbed them both, allowing my reflexes to fully digest at the handles. It felt comfortable. It felt so surreal. And for the first time in days, I finally felt at home. 

"Your weapons-- I wish I gave them to you sooner, but I've been kind of selfish since you've been around. I even wanted to see what it was like for you to just forget your old life. Especially the history with me," Karai confesses while slipping some sort of leather straps on me that fit perfectly around my shell. Soon, I realized that it was a belt and the things on my back holstered my blades, which made a lot more sense. 

"I hated you," I plainly said, stating the true obvious here. The first time I saw her, I felt it. The hatred was there and I could never figure out why. 

"Yes," she says and when she continues I didn't even realize we were alone, but in the kitchen, I saw Lillian with Codey and relief rained over my head, "My father was a proportion of your hatred. You and your brothers fought him for years, including myself as I was defending him because my honor at the time was the only thing that meant more to me," 

"I need you to take me to them," I said again, but this time really meaning it, "It isn't me asking you, it's me telling you, Karai,"

"I told you, Leo," she shrugs, as Lillian enters the room again, "I haven't been able to find them,"

"But I have," Lillian interrupts, looking slightly embarrassed as my eyes fall to her instead of the other woman in the room, "I actually have quite the confession to make,"

"Spill," was the only thing I said, crossing my arms and sinking into the comfort of my blades on my back that should have been there ages ago. I felt a deep connection with them and I figured that at least this was something that was definitely missing from my life or at least twenty-five percent of it. 

"I've been seeing someone," she begins, keeping her hands over each other, twisting and pulling the rings that covered her fingers, "He goes by the name, Cade, and there's something really off about him, but he seems special, and when I say special, I mean, he's truly the sweetest, but also the smartest man I've ever encountered and um, he was able to tell what I was hiding-- and he drug it out of me, I couldn't help myself. He says he knows you, Leonardo, and he also knows your brothers. He even told me that they miss you very much," 

"How long have you known about this?" Karai asks her, sounding a little harsh.

"I-I, um," Lillian stammers, pulling at her fingers again. 

"How long Lilly!" Karai yells, throwing herself in the girl's face, demanding an answer. 

"A c-couple of days!" she squeaks, having tears in her eyes and I felt no pity-- I felt no pity for either of them, "I-I'm so sorry-- he was just so sweet, and I haven't met anyone like him since my husband had left, and-- and we agreed that we tell no one, not even the reptiles!" 

_Reptiles._

Not even my brothers know. I bet they don't even know I'm alive. 

I had to get out of here, _immediately._

"Where Lillian, where is he?" Karai demands again, angrily setting out for answers that I've been grieving for, that I've been standing here dying for. 

"He hasn't exactly told me, but he said the mountains-- he even offered me to stay a night with him, b-but I said no because I had to return to my father, but he did mention somewhere in Denali," Lillian answers, her hands obviously shaking at the sight of me watching her and I turn again, storming off to the front door. 

"Leo!" Karai calls and she slips in front of me, blocking the door, "You can't just go out there!"

"Why not, I don't need your help!" I remind her bitterly and she sighs again. 

"I know I've been wrong-- I've never been _this_ wrong but I was! I had no right to keep you from your brothers, especially after the accident, but the least you can do is let me take you to Denali. I have a car, and it's only thirty minutes from town," 

I look off into the distance, debating with myself. I didn't actually know how to get there so seeing as this was my only shot, whether I trusted her or these people or not, I had no choice. 

"Fine, but we need to go now," I tell her right as she moves out of the way and I'm out the door, not looking back. Not wanting to, but then I remember the _child._

I knew he'd be safe with that family. They weren't as messed up as the son. James. I knew that maybe Felix was telling the truth and he would be getting locked away somewhere that portrayed to be some sort of hospital for the mentally insane. James had a history and deep down inside, I had hoped he was praying that I never saw him again.

In the car, Karai and I were sharing nothing but silence. She wanted me to talk, but I couldn't. I was too upset, or angry. I couldn't really tell the difference. I was lied to and kept from something that could have made my life better than living a day to day routine, not being able to remember anything from before and now, the only thing in my head was getting back to my brothers. Who I still didn't know. And that _might_ be a problem. 

But the weapons, they helped with the pain. They removed a part of the void inside of me. One I couldn't explain because of the man I saw. The _rat._

_**He** also knew my name. _

Up ahead and out the window, I saw the snowy mountains and planted on the hill and up a long driveway buried in the nook of all this weather, I saw a cabin. A fairly large one with two stories and huge windows. As we drove up the gravel road, I had an eerie feeling that maybe they saw us driving up. 

I was meant to know these people. I knew them my entire life, supposedly and here I am going to meet them for the very first time, and I was nervous. _Very nervous._

"Are you sure you wanna do this?" Karai asked me, catching my attention while stopping the car and turning off the ignition. 

I peered out the window, looking vaguely at the large home and I nodded my head, "Yeah, let's do this,"

I opened the door and stepped out, my toes crunching in the snow and when I shut the door, a wave of heat rushed through my veins and I gripped the edges of the window but shutting it anyway and Karai steps out too, hesitating of course, and my trust for her only falls further. 

The front door thankfully wasn't made of glass and when Karai knocked and then rang the doorbell, I was on the tips of my toes, waiting and maybe regretting my decision a little. 

After two minutes, the door swung open and we both saw a tall man with shaggy black hair and he too was covered in ink on both arms and was, _human._

When he saw me, his eyes widened, "Leo?" 

"Hello," Karai spoke up, clearing her throat, "You must be Cade, Lillian told us about you," she clarifies and quite loudly too as if she was rubbing the fact that his lover narked on him. 

"Uh," he pauses, "Yes, um, yes, please, come in," Cade steps back, widening the door for us to walk in. 

Once inside, the warmth from the home immediately relaxes me and when I inhaled the scent of the wood-burning in the fireplace, my nose caught something else too and I scrunched it up, getting confused. But the smell alone was just as familiar. 

"She also mentioned that you knew Leonardo's brothers, they are here, aren't they?" Karai asked, and in the distance of upstairs I heard the faint laughter of someone, and the noise was only getting louder the closer they got. 

I saw Cade swallow thickly and his eyes told me that he too was quite nervous, but _what exactly did he have to be nervous about?_

"Guys, can you please come down here!" he shouts but putting it calmly. 

"Chill dude, we're coming!" replied a young-sounding man, but when he and a much taller one came down the stairs, my heart swelled. 

_They looked exactly like me, except for a few non-similar features._

The smaller one had a box in his hands and when his eyes set on me, it tumbled from his grip, pouring out its contents onto the floor which looked like books, comic books. 

His expression fell flat and the other one looked just as surprised, but dead in an odd way. 

Our eyes were glued together, and his much darker ones burned into me. 

_These were the brother's everyone kept telling me about._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanna dedicate two songs to this chapter as I listen to tons of music while I'm writing and this one definitely deserves some that are special and close to my heart. 
> 
> Ryder - Ruins & Emmit Fenn - Overflow 
> 
> Listen to it on Youtube, by MrSuicideSheep! They are gentle and loving songs that I think are perfect for this Chapter!
> 
> I imagine this song playing while Leo is going through the thoughts in his head as he realizes the wrongs of why he's been kept here in this dreadful place like some sort of animal being experimented on. I also definitely see this song playing during the end when Leo sees his brothers for the (first) time, so to speak. Especially when they see him. 
> 
> It's super emotionally driven and I'm pretty happy with this one. Not as happy as I was with the last Chapter, but this one was very sweet and very heartwarming so, I hope you enjoy it! For updates, follow my Twitter, via Hydrakinz.
> 
> I've decided to really nail down on my updating terms so, check there, or use any of my contact info!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	34. Sᵒᶜⁱᵃˡ ᴰⁱˢᵗʳᵃᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The egg is protected and Donatello is healing-- but not mentally as Leo makes his unruly return and brings back pain that the brothers didn't think they had.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣ|||

Sᵒᶜⁱᵃˡ ᴰⁱˢᵗʳᵃᶜᵗⁱᵒⁿ

**[ Donatello ]**

I've lost count of my notes. There had to of been a few piles scattering the desk around me, but I had so much to learn, so much to figure out and remember. I was tired, sore and most importantly, the egg was _safe._

I measured it at seventeen centimeters long and over fourteen in width. After the first day, I was bedridden. I needed the sleep, the rest and Mike and Cade keep telling me I need more. But I beg to differ because I could either agree with them or do the work I knew they wouldn't do or even care to do. 

Raphael stays quite close, but I finally got him to take a break and shower. But I get the feeling that he and the rest of the household need a little something more to quench their thirst, so I try not to push too hard on them. 

Rubbing my eyes I release a large yawn and stand up, checking the temperature on the incubation lamp again. The glass makeshift screens surrounding the egg were something that Cade helped me with. In the basement, there was an odd amount of items that I could use during these times and I've actually missed tinkering a bit. 

As I stared at it, I adjusted the heat, making more room for my notes and just when I was about to pick up the pen again I could hear my brother's upstairs roughhousing again and then a bit of tumbling or crashing I couldn't really tell but then Mikey yelled. 

"Donnie!" 

His voice carried to me and loudly too. It sounded like my brother, but it _didn't._

I gave the egg a quick look and huffed loudly before twisting around in my chair and standing up. I flicked off the light which made the purple LED's in the incubation glow and I smiled because of how nice it actually looked. I took small steps as the burning in my back was still there, but I made it up the stairs anyway and shut the door behind me. 

"Alright, Mike, what'd you break now?" I ask with a bit of amusement in my voice. 

When I enter the living room, my brothers are standing side by side and the box we found earlier on filled with books that I knew Mikey would enjoy was scattered across the floor and the look on their faces were impossible to read. 

I felt my heart skip a beat as I rounded the corner, holding my hand against the wall to take some pressure off of my feet and when I saw what they saw, I wished I had stayed in the basement. 

"Leo?" the words were out before I could even think about them and my voice cracked.

He was there. He was actually there, in front of me. I wanted to run and jump into his arms. But the confused expression he was giving me wasn't the look I was exactly hoping for. And Karai was here, with him. 

_Why was she with him, and what was she doing here?_

"Donatello, it's nice to see you again," she greets me with a friendly smile and a bow but I can't even think straight enough to greet her back, "We've made the decision to finally come and reunite Leo with you four,"

"Decision?" Raph finally speaks, eyeing me from the side and I could see the look on his face turning and twisting from confusion to anger. 

"Well," Karai tilts her head towards Cade and I could immediately smell something fishy about this, "Not even two hours ago, we were told about you. At the time of caring for Leo, we didn't even know you guys were in Alaska, or else, Leo would probably have returned to you much sooner than expected," she explains, then meeting my eyes again.

"Caring?" Mikey questions looking at me this time then back at the brother who didn't even look pleased to be here, "Is he sick or something?"

Leo looked so calm, but he was definitely not himself. Without his mask that I knew Raph still had but never mentioned, he was my Leo, our Leo, but everything about this felt off. 

"What the hell is goin' on?" Raph demanded to know, and I knew if answers didn't come out now, things were going to get serious. And not the good type of serious, the _bloody_ one. 

"Leo has amnesia," Karai blurted out as if he can't answer for himself and I froze in place. 

"Amnesia?" Raph scoffs.

"You can't be serious," Mikey says, "What does that mean though, like, he's forgotten everything?"

"About us," Raph says, narrowing his eyes at me from the side and my heart drops. 

_This can't be happening right now._

"How long has this been going on?" I couldn't help but ask, my voice quiet but audible enough.

"From what I've encountered, since the accident," she answers, keeping her hands behind her back to inform us respect and politeness. She truly hasn't changed but has all at the same time.

Mikey slowly approached Leo, staring up at him with caution, "So, you seriously don't know who I am?" 

Leo peers down at him but in his eyes, I could see something a little familiar. Leo shook his head at our little brother, "I-I'm sorry, but no," 

"We um, we have a doctor back at home, where he was staying-- and Felix said that he was unaware of how long his condition may last. It could take time or years. It could even be life long-- we don't really know, but it is possible for his memory to return," Karai explains, though I already knew this information. 

"How'd you find us?" I question further, finally moving away from the wall to stand next to Raph. 

"My sister-in-law, Lillian told us," 

"Lillian?" Mikey says, looking directly at Cade, "Isn't Lillian that chick you've been hanging out with, dude?" 

"Maybe it's a different one," Raph corrects him, but I don't think it is. 

"He's right," Leo mumbles, answering my thoughts completely and the tension in the room thickens, "She told us about him-- about how sweet he was, about how smart he acted, including being able to figure out things she's was forced to explain to him," 

I watched Raph's expression change and I grabbed his wrist, "So, what does that mean?" I asked, though I already knew the truth. 

"It means he's a liar," Raph confronts, trying to pull from my grip, but I keep it the best I could. 

Cade sighs, lowering his head, "Yes, I do confess that I knew about Leo's condition," 

"How fuckin' long did you know?" Raph questions on clenched teeth and this time he broke away from my fingers, nearly pulling me with him as I fell forward but Mikey was across the room to catch me in time and I released a sigh, silently thanking him. 

"Awhile," Cade gently defends, holding his hands up, "I can explain though,"

"Explain what, that ya cared more about gettin' your dick wet than tellin' me and my brothers that he was alive this entire time, that he was okay-- just a little banged up!" Raph yells ringing my ears. 

"He isn't just a little banged up, Raphael!" Cade shouts back, clenching his fists at his sides, "He doesn't remember either of you--" he trails off, making direct eye contact, "He doesn't even remember the egg" 

I shake my head, feeling the built-up emotions inside of me starting to surface and I grip Mikey's arm tighter, "You still lied," I said, and Mikey hugged me closer, but not tight enough to hurt me.

"Egg?" Karai then asks, seeming a little more interested in the conversation. 

"Yes, the fuckin' egg!" Raph yells at her, turning his attention back to our friend, "Donatello finally gave birth, and Leo missed it because of this selfish son of a bitch!" 

"I told you, I can explain. But I can't do that if we're yelling at one another!" Cade says, crossing his arms and lowering his voice, "I know that you four will be upset with me for some time to come, but if I'm allowed to, I will explain. But for now, we have to worry about other matters," 

"Yeah, like gettin' fearless to remember all the bullshit we've put up with over the last fifteen years-- and you, the fuck are you doin' here?" Raph shouts bitterly at Karai who didn't flinch at his harsh attitude. 

"Do not treat me like I am not upset over this. I was lied to as well and by my own family. After that little accident back in Manhattan, I decided to get the hell away from that place. It's pretty coincidental, but be glad I was there when I was. The man who tended to Leonardo's wounds used to be a scientist working for the mentally insane and wanted to use him for his own experiments," she goes on, pushing the brutal fights from my mind that we used to get into and now, it's nothing but a cloud in my head, like something that didn't even happen. 

I couldn't really understand how we changed this much, but then again, I knew the answer. I'd just rather not think about it. But it mostly had to do with our emotions. And everyone here knew it. _Except for Leo._

"Well," Raph scoffs again and for once, I'm not mad with his attitude, "Thank you for bein' oh so fuckin' kind to fill us in and bringin' our brother back, now you can leave," he dismisses her and I don't argue. In fact, neither of us do. 

_I'd even want Cade to go, but this isn't my home._

Karai nods her head, understanding that she isn't apart of the equation anymore and slowly turns to Leo, "Will you be alright?" she asks him and I hear Raph snarl next to me.

"I think so," he answers like we aren't standing here.

"I will be back, but I don't know when, so, if you need anything-- you know how to contact me," she says, handing Leo a cellphone, which is pretty high end and that's when a ping of jealousy washes over me. 

Karai gives us one last glance before turning and going out the front door and moments later I hear the engine of her car cranking up and then we are left with the silence swallowing the room. 

"So, what now?" Mikey whispers to me and I give him no response, letting go of his arm. 

I take one step, moving closer to my mate, who was-- _no longer my mate._

Clearing my throat, I press my hands together with an attempted smile, "Are you hungry?" 

"No, I actually had some breakfast before coming here," he smiles in return, making my heart ache, "But thank you-- er, I didn't catch your name?"

The ache in my heart then disappears and turns to ash, "Oh," the words fall from my lips in a whisper, "I guess we have to re-introduce ourselves, right?" I then look over my shoulder at Raph who didn't seem fazed, but I knew he was fighting everything inside of him to stay clear about all of this. 

I knew something happened, but not this bad. Not so bad that he'd forget us, _forget me._

The words dragged in my mind, "I'm Donatello," I said, reaching for my brothers and the only one that came forward was Mikey and he grabbed my hand, "Donnie, or Don, for short, and this is--" 

"Michelangelo!" he states proudly with his signature smile that I wish I could mock, "But you can call me, Mikey-- kinda weird, saying that to my own brother-- but hey! We aren't the ones that banged our heads so hard that we forgot our own flesh and blood!" he giggles nervously earning a smack to the back of the head by Raph as he finally decided to get closer, but obviously hesitating. Mikey then yelps and swats his arm. 

"Quit bein' an idiot!" he says to Mikey and I nudge him roughly. 

"Tell him your name," I plead, and realization is clear on his face. 

"Right," he shrugs, "I'm Raph, or uh, Raphael if ya prefer it the long way" 

Leo keeps his smile and he bows just like how Karai did, "It's nice to finally meet you," 

"Would you like me to show him to his room?" Cade asks, making his presence known and less forgotten. 

"No," Raph says just as I answer with a, "Yes,"

We both look at each other, "Yes, take him to his room and then maybe we can show him around the cabin a bit later," 

Raph crosses his arms over his chest and decides to finally shut up. The three of us silently watch Cade escort our clueless brother from the room and up the stairs. Once I know he's out of earshot, I turn to Raph and glare. 

"What the hell was that?" I ask him, and he rolls his eyes. 

"It was me not understandin' how the fuck we let somethin' let this happen!" he comes to a near shout. 

"We couldn't have prevented that," I tell him, holding my head as I sit down, wincing a bit. 

"The hell we couldn't, Donnie!" he aggressively disagrees, "It's called not even comin' to Alaska! It was just another mistake, another mistake that nearly got him killed! I'd rather Leo be dead than him forgettin' us!" 

I widen at him from the couch, "You know you don't mean that," 

"Why not, Donatello? Look at me! Look at fuckin' Mike and then that sick son of a bitch upstairs! If he died, we could just bring him back!" he continues to argue and for once, I knew he was right.

"There's the chance of being too late, Raphael and you know it. Who know's how long it took those people to find him. Heck, I'm truly surprised that he didn't freeze to death out there," I then shrug not wanting to think about Leo dying whether it be him coming back or not as some vicious, undead, demon. 

"We came here to find, Codey," Mikey says, only reminding me again of what we've failed to do.

"Did ya ever think that maybe that butler dude was right?" Raph asks and I immediately shake my head to disagree. 

"Right about what?" 

He shrugs dramatically and walks over to one of the windows, "He had a reason to take him, and he saw how much we were fightin' and carrying on like the kid wasn't even there," 

"So, what you're saying is, maybe he's better off without us or something?" I glare at him again, "Because if it is, then you better be joking!" 

"Come on, Don, I love him just as much as the rest of ya, but we do have our own kid to worry about now and who knows when she'll come," he points out, basically insisting that we forget about the promise we gave April. 

"Raph's right, Donnie, but he's also wrong-- I miss him. I miss caring for him," Mikey says with a smile, "But, there's too much crap going on around us and there's always that chance he could end up hurt," 

I stood up, holding on to the arm of the couch, "And look where that got us, huh? He's not even hurt, he's been kidnapped!" 

"And how would you know, huh?" Raph turns, looking dead at me, "You think just because you're the brains of this team which by the way-- _doesn't_ exist anymore that it just automatically means ya know everything! Well, ya don't Donnie! So, stop actin' like it!" he yells, forcing a frown on my face. 

"You guys sure yell a lot," Leo commented as he made his presence known. I turned my head, wondering how long he had been standing there, listening.

"Yeah, you ain't the first one ta say that," Raph retorts, shrinking his voice. 

"How long have you been there?" I ask him, Leo's eyes landing on me and he shrugs. 

"Maybe five minutes or less," he answers with another award-winning smile. 

"Leo's seems to still have the moves," Mikey elbows me as I seat myself back on the couch, not understanding why I stood in the first place. 

"Did you get settled into your room okay?" I say, still not taking my eyes off of him. 

"The room is a lot bigger than the last one, but yes, yes, I did-- but besides that, what were you guys arguing about?" Leo questions, looking to Raph for an answer as he still had his back turned to the three of us. His attention was fixed on whatever was out that window. 

"Doesn't matter," he finally answers, keeping his arms crossed and sounding oblivious. 

"Well, it does if you were yelling about it. Maybe I can help," Leo offers, still not sitting down. 

He can't remember anything about his past, yet he's still the same loving, caring and thoughtful person I know. Though there was one other thing I did know and it was that he still carried his stubbornness with him and it being his biggest burden of them all. 

"Help?" Raph scoffs and trails off in his own mind. 

"I think I could," Leo replies oh so sweetly and maybe with a hint of sarcasm.

"What would the point of that be, Leo? You don't even remember us, let alone why we came here!" my older brother exclaims and I have the urge to hit him but I couldn't just walk across the room to do it. 

"Then would you care to remind me, Ralph?" Leo says and my cheeks heat up with embarrassment. My hands immediately go to my face and Mikey cackles with laughter. 

_"Ralph!"_ my little brother giggles, and I slap him on the arm but it doesn't stop his amusement.

Underneath my glasses, I slide my fingers down enough to see Raph turn to Leo and the look on his face is either shock or just pure rage, "What did you call me?" 

I release a laugh of my own and Mikey shoves me, "That is your name, isn't it?" Leo asks, confusion clear on his scaly unmasked features. 

"No, dude, it's Raph!" Mikey corrects him with another muffled giggle and I can't help but join him. 

"Oh," Leo mumbles right as Raph stalks over to him, " _Raph,_ then, my apologies,"

"We came here to get our nephew back," Raph tells him, avoiding the wrong in his voice and sheer emotion that he needs to remind Leo of our original plan that backfired, "And if you don't remember that, then you can't help,"

"Nephew? Did he belong to one of yous?" Leo questions and I sigh. 

"No, he was April and Caseys," I tell him, lowering my head. 

"I know those names," he says, "Karai was speaking about them back in that house I stayed in,"

"What, why the fuck was she talkin' about them?" Raph bitterly responds, finally sitting down on the couch opposite of me and Mikey. 

"That fruit loop didn't know much about them, though she was at their wedding!" Mikey cheerfully announces and I cringe at the memory as I now hate Casey. 

"Exactly that, _the wedding_ \--" Leo pauses and I look up again, feeling the ache in my back, "And then the child, _Codey,_ " 

The room falls quiet and when Leo notices, his eyes scan the rest of us. I don't think I heard him clearly enough, but I know what he said and it can't be possible. 

"What did you say?" Raph asks him, tilting his head, "Did you see him?"

Leo nods, leaning on the doorway, "He came in with a man-- I remember the look on his face when he saw me. It's like he immediately wanted to be in my arms,"

Raphael stands, "Where?" he demands. 

"I don't know the address directly-- but I know the house wasn't far from the hospital," 

"What did the man look like, Leo, did you find out his name?" I ask him calmly to ensure he doesn't get too shaken by the tone in Raph's voice. 

"James, they called him James," 

"You're gonna take me there," Raph says, walking out of the room, and Mikey's quick to follow him, and so am I. 

"You can't just go there and take him!" I grab Raph by the arm and he stops, cocking his head at me, scowling in my direction and I let him go. 

"Why the fuck not, that dick bag took him-- he was rightfully ours in the first place!" 

I look away, "Fine, Raph, I'm done trying to stop you! I'd rather be here anyway-- have you already forgotten?" 

His face softens a bit, "No, Don, I haven't. But if we're gonna get outta here, we have to find Codey-- and by the looks of it, fearless here, just dropped the answer right in our laps!"

Leo follows us into the wide corridor, looking confused as ever, "So, we're going back?"

"Yes, and you're gonna take me to show me exactly where those fuckers live!" Raph answers, adjusting his gear and holstering his sai's. 

_I felt like I haven't seen those in ages._

"I don't exactly understand any of this, but I'm sure it all will be clear soon enough, so, let's get going," Leo says, which kind of shocks me by his tone. He didn't put up a fight or argue like most of us were used to. He always made the plans and for a while now, I felt like the word leader was being spread around between the four of us like it was some game. 

"You and Mikey are going to stay here-- keep an eye on Cade if ya can and the egg of course," Raph suggests and I nod my head as a million thoughts race through my mind, and just before they walk out the door, Raph catches my lips with a kiss and does the same for Mikey. 

My cheeks flush with excitement and maybe a little shock, but then I see the look on Leo's face and he's appalled by what he just saw and the amount of guilt for him rocks my body. I had almost forgotten, _again_ , that he doesn't remember anything-- especially our relationship. And now, the only thing I can think of is what a struggle it's gonna be to remind him that we're all kind of, _together._

Not long after Leo and Raph disappear, all my hope returns and my heart is filled with joy that maybe this trip won't be such a disaster after all. It will be difficult, I already knew that. But there's still hope left in the cracks between the sidewalk. _I just had to find them._

"Donnie," Mikey says, snapping me from my thoughts as I watch him pick up the books from the floor that he dropped earlier, "I was thinking about some stuff,"

"And?" I ask, walking closer and bending down to help him. 

"I think I might have a solution for Codey," 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	35. ᴿᵉᵐᵉᵐᵇᵉʳ ᴹᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Right back into Chapter Thirty-Three, Raph and Leo continue their journey to get Codey back and are caught up with a questioning war, which leads Raph to his doom.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣᴵⱽ

ᴿᵉᵐᵉᵐᵇᵉʳ ᴹᵉ

**[ Raphael ]**

This felt like all the other times from way back in the day when I'd run out and Leo would follow me. He always denied it. But I just knew he'd follow to keep an eye on me just in case I got into some crap I couldn't get myself out of.

Which I did. I always did somethin' to get myself hurt. And he'd have to save my tail, every single time it happened. Leo always cared much more than he let on and sometimes I'd hate the way he'd hide from his emotions because of his interests. The only thing on his mind was bein' the best fighter, the best trainer. And then it came, the leader thing and _here we are._

I was one of the biggest hypocrites for sayin' somethin' like that though. I hid my emotions from the entire world even when no one asked me to. The only thing people had a problem with was my anger and at certain times, or well, most times, I didn't really give a shit what my brothers or even my father thought of me, or my anger. I went and did as I pleased. Especially to him, to Leo.

_I used to be a real piece of fuckin' work, and I hated lookin' back on it._

"So, why exactly are you making me go back to this place, Ral-- er, Raph?" he quickly corrects himself and I grumble quietly. 

"Let me do the questionin' from now on, yeah? For example, what happened when that prick saw ya?" I impatiently asked, sitting at a red light in the middle of town. 

On our way out, I decided to take Cade's car because first off, why the fuck not? I'm not too happy with him right now and the asshole just leaves his keys lyin' around just about anywhere. 

On top of that, the windows were tinted just enough to keep our appearances hidden from the public eye, thankfully. Leo, on the other hand, was wearing actual clothing that fit him well. He looked kind of normal in all of this while I stuck to my usual pants that were covered in tears and rips. He even felt different to be around. I didn't like it, _one bit._

"You have an awful attitude," he accuses, breaking me from my thoughts. 

"So I've been told, but ya still haven't answered my question," I said as the light in front turns green and I hit the gas. 

"He freaked out," Leo answers after a moment of silence, "I didn't know why but I guess I do now. He told me that we were dangerous and that whatever happened back in New York was what provoked him to perform such action," 

I release a light growl under my breath, "There was no reason for him to kidnap our nephew like he did, and when I get my hands on him--" 

"You can't," he says, stopping me from talking and suddenly I'm bein' brought back to all those years ago, way before Leo ever killed anyone. Way before anyone dared to hurt one of our own. We were just kids then and he still believed that hurting someone or even goin' as far as killin' someone was against complete guidelines of the ninja. 

"Why the fuck not?" I cursed in his direction while taking my eyes off of the road for only a second. 

"Because I wanted to," he muttered, not paying any attention to me, "In fact, I nearly did but that girl stopped me when she gave me the baby-- I was at his throat like some animal and I demanded that he hand him over, but she stopped me," 

_So, the Leo I once knew was still in there somewhere. All hope wasn't lost after all and the truth behind that made me kind of happy-- he just didn't know it._

"On top of that, Jameson isn't even there any more last time I heard," he continues and I nearly drive my foot through the brake pedal and from behind the car I hear a line of horns honking at me. With the first chance I get, I pull the car over onto the side of the road and throw it into park.

When I look at my brother again, his eyes are wide with surprise, "What the hell do ya mean, he ain't there?"

"Felix said he was sending him back to the hospital. Apparently, this wasn't his first time committing such a crime-- plus he already had a son that he abandoned," he explains while lowering the panic in his voice. 

"Motherfucker, so where is Codey? Why'd you just leave him!" I shout at him and Leo's face falls into a hard line. 

"I didn't want to. But by the time I got out the door and into the sunlight, the only thing I could think about was getting back to the people Karai kept telling me about-- she told me so much, so much I couldn't understand, that I _still_ can't understand. But I'm trying my hardest to," he sighs, looking back out the window from the unmoving vehicle. 

I shake my head, removing my hands from the steering wheel, "Did you at least see that he's safe?"

"He was," Leo answers far too quickly but then adds, "They are very sweet people. I mean, think about it, they found me out here, took me in and dressed my wounds. If it wasn't for them, I probably wouldn't be sitting here talking to you, having my second chance at life,"

"Why do you talk like ya died, Leo?" I can't help but ask. I was tired of this sad talkin' nonsense.

"Because I feel like I did. I don't remember anything-- when I should," he simply states, clenching his fists on his lap, "It upsets me more than I'd like to admit. So, that's why I made my move to get out of there. I had to know who you were, so I could remember. But I don't,"

I was gripping the steering wheel again. I was so mad at myself for letting this happen to him. I could have stopped it, but instead, I let him be the last one to jump off that plane. Which still wasn't explained yet. In fact, Cade had a lot to explain for. 

"Codey is still there, right?" I ask him and I could feel his eyes on me. 

"I agree with Donatello. We can't just go and get him, he's not rightfully ours,"

I shake my head reliving every day of my life all over again because not once have I had a moment where the oh, fearless one agrees with what I have to say let alone an idea. 

"Listen, Leo," I begin, not looking at him this time, "I don't give a flyin' fuck what you think! You fell and hit your head because we came here to get that boy-- we had a friend, a very special fuckin' friend, and she died givin' birth to him, and we made a promise that we'd keep him safe, so, if you wanna be a pussy about gettin' your nephew back then I'm leavin' your ass here and I'll find em' myself-- if not, then you can tell me where these assholes live and we both can go and get him back!" I stare straight forward at the dusty road ahead, not really preparing for what he was to say next, but either way, I hope he decides to come with me. 

Minutes go by and I still choose to not look at him, but once I'm tired of waiting I crank the car again and get us moving back onto the road and then Leo finally speaks, "Fine, it's the next road to your left," he says, making a smile stretch across my face.

After another ten or so minutes, the space between me and my brother is falling quiet again and I can't fuckin' stand it, "So, I see that your leg healed up pretty well," 

"Oh," I hear him say so quietly that I don't think he attends on letting me hear him, but I do, "Yeah, I guess it did. Felix told me it was pretty remarkable,"

"Felix is the doctor, huh?" 

"Yeah, he's alright," Leo responds, "Lillian too," he then adds. 

"If _you're_ saying she is then Cade must have really grown to her," 

"She explained him in such an odd way" he trails off. 

"What ya mean?"

"Like, he was something other than what I saw,"

The words come and I'm suddenly a little nervous. I don't exactly know why but I was. Leo knew about me before. He definitely knew about Mikey-- fuck, he was there. He was there trying to pull me away from his lifeless corpse. The memory made me grip the wheel again and I could of sworn I heard it crack.

"He kind of is," I say honestly to avoid confrontation later. 

"I can only imagine," he stifles a laugh, "I was just as shocked when I saw what I was,"

"Yeah, it was probably pretty unpleasant to wake up, lookin' like a toad," I grin in his direction and he finally makes eye contact with me. His blue eyes are only but a fuckin' mystery now and I hate it. He looks at me with too much wonder and confusion and it pisses me off. I wanna reach over and kiss him like I used to, but now, he'd be disgusted. He'd probably try and uppercut me. 

"I was more concerned about the tattoos really" he admits, peering down at his forearm and I turn my head back towards the road, "You have them too," 

I nod, acknowledging his curiosity and lift my left arm up to show him the mimicking ink on my arm that's the same as his, "Yeah, we all do, except Don,"

"Why doesn't he have them?" Leo asks and still I don't really know the answer. 

"The whole tattoo thing was never really _his_ thing-- never has been," I say, always thinking too much into it because I couldn't tell anyone how many times Mikey tried to talk Don into getting a tattoo when he simply denied it with, _I'm sorry but no._

He was always the odd one out and that's why he and Leo always got along while me and Mikey were off being idiots with each other. 

"Can I ask you one more question?" he asks as if he needs permission and I shake my head, keeping my eyes on the road for once. 

"I see you askin' a lot more than just one for the next few days. So, why even ask me for permission?" 

I see him shrug out of the corner of my eye, "I don't know. But you spoke about an egg-- you all did,"

I almost hit the breaks again but instead, I keep my focus and turn down another road that Leo directs me to and I'm beginning to wonder if we're ever gonna arrive or he's just stalling me so he can ask more questions.

"Yeah, bout that. It's a real long story that'll just have to wait," I say to him without looking because I don't really know what _this_ Leo will do when he finds out that he's also a dad. Or what _this_ Leo will do when he finds out that we're all the dad, except for Donnie. He's kind of like the mother hen in all this crap. 

"I've waited weeks for answers, Raphael," he mutters my name, sounding even more off than he already did, "We've got all the time in the world to go and get our, er, Nephew. He's always gonna be there. Especially if Lillian is taking care of him,"

"I said, it's a long fuckin' story and call me Raph!" I shout, slamming my fist down on the wheel. 

"I don't care!" he shouts back, sounding equally pissed. _Man things really haven't changed._

"You would," I mumbled lowering my voice while stopping the car at the end of the street that was lined with houses. I shut the engine off and sat back, preparing for the longest talk of my entire life. 

"What do you mean I would?" 

Leo was full-on staring at me now. And I had a feeling he wouldn't be lookin' away any time soon. I didn't wanna do this here. I didn't wanna tell him that before all this shit, he was gay. 

_Maybe he already knows, dumbass._

I ignored my shadowy thoughts and kept my eyes fixed on the sun setting over the mountains ahead of me. Not only gay-- but, _fuck,_ I hate usin' that word. It sounds so foreign on my tongue. Even in my own head, I hated it. But how else would I say it? You were a homo, a homo with me. With the rest of us. Specifically Donatello. 

I huff loudly and let my head fall back against the rest of the seat, "I don't really know how to explain it to ya," 

"Try-- because I'm not telling you anything else until you give me something" he threatens and I can't help but smirk from his attempt. 

"That's cute, Leo," I say to him when I turn my head and his face almost looks red under the dim lighting in the car. 

"Try" he repeats, but not in a demanding type of way which was fresh to me. 

My eyes meet his and I sigh again, taking in the air between us, "You were uh, in love," 

"In love, with who?" 

"I'm putting it pretty lightly here, but um, with me, with all of us," I answer, turning my head away to avoid the confused expression I already knew was forming on his face. 

"Oh," was the only word that fell from his lips and I could sense that he finally looked away from me, but he wasn't finished, "Is that, apart of our nature?"

"No," I try not to laugh, thinking about how ridiculously true that is. It definitely was, "It isn't. Mikey wanted to nail April dozens of times, and maybe I did too. But, as the years went on, we discovered somethin' more. Somethin' so good that it was simply unavoidable," 

"Love for each other? Isn't that incest?" he questions and I huff angrily at the mention of yet another word I fuckin' hate. But he don't know better. Especially right now. 

"Y-Yeah, I guess it is, but we don't call it that! We don't look in the mirror and think of ourselves as everyone else. We don't obey the rules of the world as we are our own people,"

"Have we um," he trails off, but I know exactly what he's talking about and I'm smirking again. 

"Tons of times," I answer him before he can even finish the sentence and silence fills the air between us again. Every time this happened it was unbelievably suffocating and I hated it, "Does that bother you, or something?"

"A lot of things bother me about this, but, what can I do? Absolutely nothing because I can't remember any of it and it infuriates me!" he exclaims in the small space, "But that still doesn't really answer my question,"

"The egg-- it's ours," I tell him without holding back, but letting it be simple enough to understand. 

"Ours, as in, mine, there's something in it, that's mine?" 

"Yes, you idiot! You're a dad, I'm a fuckin' dad! All of us are, and Donnie, Don he fuckin' gave birth to it, and you weren't there because you had to be the hero!" I yell at him directly and the more I speak, the more I think he shrinks in his seat, "You told me to jump first so you'd be last, you wanted to make sure we all made it out before you did, and now look, look at you, you can't remember! You can't remember me, what we had!" by the time I'm done talking I'm out of breath and for even a moment, I feel like me again. I feel like the me before I became what I am.

I look at my brother again and he's staring at me with wide eyes. I felt it once more. I felt the need to kiss him. To swallow every doubt, fear or problem he must be contemplating right about now. 

_Fuck it._

I reach across the console and grab my brother by the throat, his hands immediately fly up to grab my arm and push me away but he's too late, my lips are on his and I'm not holding back. I couldn't tell if he was kissing back or just taking it but I needed it. I fuckin' hated Leo for the way he's always been but I loved him just as equal and I never had the balls to admit it. 

"You have to remember," I tell him in between kisses, "Ya have to," my voice is only but a whisper, but I'm begging-- I can't believe I am, but fuck, I am. I never thought it'd be this bad. I never thought that Leo losin' his goddamn mind would make me feel so sick or so lost. 

"I've been trying!" he fusses, trying to push me off but he fails, again, "Please, I don't, mmf--"

I cut him off, losing myself in the taste of his lips and I deepen the kiss, forcing my tongue in his mouth unknowingly understanding why I thought that this would help him remember. But I was bein' selfish. I couldn't help it. 

_Who cares, take what you want._

"R-Raph," he whines against me, curling his fingers into my jaw in an attempt to scratch me or push me away yet again, I didn't know. I didn't wanna stop, even if I was hurting him. 

Then the images of Donnie's bruises are in my head again and I pull myself back so hard that I fall back into my seat with a large thud. Leo is staring right at me and is heaving his chest with every breath. 

"Sorry," was the only thing I could manage to say before I noticed how dark it was outside. 

We needed to get moving before it got too late. Not that I really cared about the time, but we were wastin' it. Or I was. After coming back down to earth, I situated myself in the seat and cranked the car and started driving again. 

I don't know what came over me. But I've become so careless lately and It's gettin' to a point of where I can't even stop myself. I've been over this a thousand times and now, I don't understand why I've broken into. My self-control is haywire, and my mind alone is just filled with bullshit. 

"I-It's just up this road," Leo stammers, turning himself forward in his seat. 

I follow his directions again, trying to regain focus and I manage enough to make it to the driveway just in front of a huge two-story home just south of the neighborhood. 

"This it?" I ask him, looking out the window and he nods his head getting out, ignoring me. 

_Fuck._

I climb out next and walk up the sidewalk, not carin' too much for stealth as it's nearly seven at night. Leo makes it to the door before I do and knocks, which surprises me. But then I forget again that he doesn't remember that before all of this, he would have never just walked up to someone's door and rang the fuckin' doorbell to say hello.

I stand next to him, preparing for whoever that answers will be freakin' the fuck out. After two minutes, the door opens and a much smaller woman in a bathrobe is standing there. 

_This must be Lillian._

She looked alright in person. She wasn't the best-looking person I've ever seen, but her look came off as basic and natural which was what Cade was into I guessed. When she saw us, a smile is near on her face. 

"Leo, you're back!" she says with light excitement in her voice, "And you brought a friend,"

"Brother," he corrects her and moves her aside, not waiting to be welcomed and I follow him, appreciating his act of being careless.

"We're here for the kid," I tell the lady and she frowns up at me after closing the door.

"Where is he, Lillian?" Leo questions, obviously a lot more braver now than he was with me in the car. 

She sighs, "He's napping-- let me go and get him," 

Once the girl has left the room, I glare down at Leo and he avoids my stare, leaning on the wall as this house seems familiar to him. It was nice and all, but I didn't feel comfortable in it. Especially with humans. I could feel what they feared and most importantly I could hear their heart beating in their chests. But then again, I never really thought about how I'd be once I'm around Codey. 

_Especially Mikey.  
_

As it crosses my mind, Lillian returns and in her arms is the little boy we've been searching for, for what felt like fuckin' ages. He looks so much older, but not by much. And when he rubs his eyes and sees me, his face lights up.

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back after a bit of a break! 
> 
> I enjoyed writing this one, especially the moment between Raph and Leo in the car. I so wanted to do more there, but not yet! We cannot move too fast, especially while Leo is still kind of healing and that's exactly what he needs is more healing and less confusion. 
> 
> This whole virus thing is drivin' everyone nuts while tornado's keep ripping through my town! FML. 
> 
> But anyway! Please stay safe, stay fuckin' clean and I hope you enjoyed this one! 
> 
> For further updates to when I'm updating check out my Twitter listed on my profile!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	36. ᵂʳᵉᶜᵏⁱⁿᵍ ᴮᵃˡˡ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get steamy in Wrecking Ball and Don and Mike discuss what to do with Codey all while Raph and Cade argue the roof off of the house and even more information gets revealed in this confusing love affair.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣⱽ

ᵂʳᵉᶜᵏⁱⁿᵍ ᴮᵃˡˡ

**[ Michelangelo ]**

"I don't know, Mike," Don sighs, lifting the goggles from his eyes to position them back on his head. He was off fiddling with some gadget to add to the incubation system and sometimes, it was super entertaining to watch him build things or repair them. Though, Donnie sometimes hated the company as he felt like he was being crowded, even by me. 

"It would be the perfect set up," I tell him, dragging my finger very delicately down the side of the incubation glass. I couldn't take my eyes off of the egg-- it was just so damn beautiful. 

"How do you think?" he asks, setting his tools on the table and flicking the light on, igniting those purple LED's again, but this time, they looked a little brighter, "We've been questioning our trust for the Tribunal for months now. Especially since that incident with Raph and Leo," 

"That was wrong of them, D, but they apologized. And you _know_ that The Ancient One was highly pissed after he found out about how Gyoji treated them," I go on, twisting around in the chair. 

"Yeah, I know, but--"

"But nothing-- we have to focus on our own lives, and I know they'll do it. I'll miss him, I truly will," I take Donnie's hands in mine, and he stares down at me with some concern and on his forearms, I see the remaining bruises from our last sexual encounter and I feel almost as bad as Raph does. It was an ongoing thing with him. He felt beyond guilty and since then, he's shut himself out completely which made me so angry-- but I couldn't just make him do things. 

I had to understand, or at least try. But, I knew that I was being selfish in the long run. 

"We can't just give him over to the Tribunal. I already have Raph running off to kidnap him, again, might I add and then Leo," Don pauses, "God, Leo," 

I frown, feeling the wash of sadness waver me. I couldn't help but feel the sting of pain in my chest earlier on when Leo's blue eyes met my own as he said he didn't even know who I was. On top of that, I could feel my brother's emotions over my own. Since I became what I am, I'm able to connect with Raph on an emotional level that I thought I could never accomplish during the time while we were discovering our Chi. 

The thought of my Chi was well gone. I had nearly forgotten about my abilities and I knew that Raph did too. My earthy magic and his fire fury was all but a dream to me right now, but I knew that that wasn't entirely the case. 

"Leo will be Leo again," I mumble off to my brother, daydreaming about specific things and possibilities that looked impossible in my head, but in my life that was up for debate, "I know it doesn't seem like it, especially since he looks at us like we're strangers, but it won't last. This thing with him, this fucking mistake that we made, it won't last forever. One way or another, it'll leave us," 

"When did you get so speech-able?" Donnie sniffles with a laugh, and pulls me in for a tender hug and I immediately embrace him back. His arms are warm around me, though I bet my skin feels like ice to him. 

"I guess I'm leader material now, huh?" I ask him sarcastically before leaning up on my tiptoes to smooch him right on the lips and he kisses back, making it sweeter and much more enjoyable. 

I press my right thumb to his cheek, letting it follow to his bottom lip and there I pull it out just enough to get my teeth in and I bite gently enough to make my brother release a wince, but more of a moan and I look up at him with pure amusement and his cheeks flush a bright red. 

"Mike," he says to me with a quiet tone and his eyes wander off towards the object on the table, and I knew then that he was staring right at the egg and I grinned, "Raph set a rule," 

I roll my eyes at the reminder and step closer to him making Donnie's backside thud against the table, but not hard enough to knock anything off, because I, of course, had to be cautious of the egg and its vulnerability. It was always on my mind. 

"I don't care about his rules. When have I ever cared about rules, D?" I question him while kneeling before he can say another word and my fingers are fiddling with the strings on his sweat pants. 

"N-Never, Mike, never," he says truthfully and watching me through the frames of his glasses, "But w-we shouldn't. At least not here,"

"Who's gonna see us, the baby? Psh, come on, D, live a little," 

Donnie scowls down at me, "I'm still healing you goofball, at least be a little considerate," 

"Oh, I'll show you considerate," I chuckle, placing a kiss over the curve in Donnie plastron. I trace the pattern with my tongue and stop just above the hem of his pants, tugging them down completely. Once the barrier is out of the way, I take my chance and lick over his slit, teasing it enough times to taste the salty substance already leaking out onto my tongue. 

"M-Mikey," my brother whispers above me and when he says my name, I look up at his blushing face and nuzzle my cheek against the opening and he groans, gripping the edge of the desk. 

"Come on, Don, don't be shy now. I wanna make my baby mama feel good," I wink at him and he comes to a near laugh but stops, hissing under his breath when my tongue is back on him, lapping at that opening again, and with one smooth, oh-so-typical-move, Donnie's member is peaking out at me and tumbling right into my hand. 

I silently praise him for being so easy this time and flick my tongue at the lengthy organ in my hand. Donnie's entire body twitches at the touch and he whines again, urging me to only go further and I do, swallowing the tip between my lips and pulling the skin down just enough to taste the dusty pink head of my brother's cock. 

"Mike, _ah,_ that's-- God, that's good," he praises me gasping under his breath again and I swallow another inch, taking my time to savor the taste and the brilliant feeling I'm giving him. 

I then drag both my hands up the base of his hips, massaging in circular motions until my fingers are able to reach his behind, and find his tail. I pinch just the end and Donnie bucks his hips into my mouth, releasing a sharp moan that sounds more like a pleasurable cry and I start moving a little faster, still aiming to tease him the best I can because whether he admits it or not, I know that my brother enjoys the build-up of being played with until he's ready to burst.

I delicately massage Donnie's tail, making him thrust into my mouth deeper and the head of his member hits the back of my throat and I welcome the familiar burn, enjoying the sounds he's making and giving to me so good. There was one thing I loved doing most in this world, and that was pleasing and pleasuring my brothers to make them happy-- it was kind of stupid, and cheesy but damn, I loved it so much. 

Donatello's hand cups the back of my neck, his fingers hot against my skin and I churr around him and he moans, taking his bottom lip between his teeth, "M-Mikey, I don't think I can--" he breathes heavy gasping again as I gag purposely on his dick, "Last, _fuck!"_

Donnie cursing is like music to my ears and when I look up, fluttering my eyes at my brother, his mouth is agape, watching me take his erection one final time and he cums without a single warning and I swallow by taking in every drop, which doesn't come as a surprise to Don. I pull my head back, still being able to feel my brother's fingers on me and I hum with bliss as I lick him clean, listening to the soft, but heavy breaths of air above me. 

"Bet Cade heard that one," I giggle and Donnie shakes his head at me, obviously a little frustrated by the reminder that someone possibly heard us fooling around, which I didn't care about at all. In fact, I enjoyed the thought of it. 

I don't bother fixing Donnie's pants as I stand up, sticking my butt in the air all dramatically and I press my lips to his once, then twice, letting him get a good taste of himself and I smile cheerfully at him, "You haven't changed one bit," he says to me before giving me another smooch. 

"Come on, let's get you some food and maybe by the time you do that, Raph and Leo will be back," I grip his hands, intertwining our fingers together and he gives the incubation thingy a quick glance and then sighs nodding his head. 

"Fine, I could use some dinner. It's getting pretty late," he finally agrees and we disappear upstairs, and as the two-hour mark rolls by on the clock, Donnie is starting to get concerned for when our brothers will be back. 

I watch him pace from window to window as I eat the remaining contents on his plate and take it over to the dishwasher, "They are fine," I reassure him and he doesn't respond. A frown takes over my face and I close in on him, wrapping my arms around his shell. At first, he's tense but quickly relaxes under my touch when my fingers hit his flesh. 

I inhale his scent, hoping that I could keep him calm enough until my brothers come home and then I can kick their asses for being so late. I knew that their reasons were good, but still, they should have been back by now. 

"Is everything alright?" our friend questions entering the room and interrupting the sweet moment I was having and I glared over my shoulder at him, lowering my arms. 

Donnie turns towards Cade, keeping his hand in mine, "They aren't back yet,"

"The car just pulled up out front," he tells us and I'm out of the room before either of them make their way towards the living room. I stand waiting at the front entrance and sure enough, I hear the car door close, then another. 

I take a step back, feeling slightly nervous as Donnie soon follows in behind me along with our friend who keeps his distance and ironically keeps his mouth shut the entire time. 

The front door opens and Raph steps in, allowing relief to wash over me and behind him came Leo with Codey in his arms and I nearly burst from so much excitement when I see him. Donnie runs forward, crushing him and Leo together in one big lunge and I can't help but to hug them too while Raph just kind of stands there, looking like a big idiot. 

"I thought we'd never see you again!" my brother sobs, bringing Codey to his chest and the toddler clings to him for dear life and I feel like crying too. Leo puts a bag next to Donnie on the floor which I assumed was the baby bag and quickly disappears from the room. Raph follows him with his eyes and huffs loudly in frustration. 

"What did you do?" I ask him, not caring who hears me. 

"What do ya mean, what'd I do? I didn't do shit!" he tells me, stalking off towards the living room while shoving Cade out of the way who gives him the sharpest glare I think I've ever seen. 

I walk after him, snatching him by the forearm and he turns, scowling at me, "Tell me what happened!"

"I did somethin' that maybe I shouldn't have done, alright?" Raph answers, avoiding my stare.

"Please tell me you didn't kill anyone," I gasp dramatically keeping my hold on his arm and he rolls his eyes at me. 

"No, I didn't fuckin' kill anyone, Mikey!" he growls, "I just-- I might have kissed Leo," 

"Might?" I laugh, "You never say might,"

"What're you two talking about?" Donnie questions while joining us in the living room, Codey in hand and bouncing him like he always did. 

"Raph kissed Leo" I blurt out simply. 

"Mikey!"

"You what?" Donnie says looking at our angry brother, "You know he doesn't remember that about us, how could you!"

"I couldn't help it, alright? He was askin' me all these fuckin' questions, and I told him that we were together, and he just-- sounded so, off about it," 

"Well, of course, he did bro!" I throw my arms into the arm, "He knows we're brothers, not blood brothers, but like, family! I'm sure that's where he went off to, was to vomit," 

"Michelangelo, you aren't helping!" Donnie scolds me, moving in front of Raph, bouncing Codey in his arms still and our nephew reaches for his older uncle, seeming to want him more, "You shouldn't have done that, now he's probably afraid, and confused,"

"He's always fuckin' confused! You haven't even gotten the chance to talk to him, Donatello! The questions he asked, the shit he said, it was all fuckin' stressful and I miss him. I fuckin' miss him, Donnie, so sue me!" Raph shouts, as Codey breaks out into fits and starts crying. I immediately shoot him a glare and Raph lowers his hands as if he's forgetting about the other human in the room, "Ah, no, no, don't cry-- fuck, I'm sorry!"

Donnie allows my brother to pull him into his arms and there he lightly bounces him up and down which soon calms Codey down, but he still fusses for a minute and I'm surely surprised that Raph was able to coo him the way he did, "Wow, he doesn't actually hate you," I giggle.

"He couldn't wait to get away from those people," my brother mutters, cradling Codey in the crook of his arm, "I can't get the way he looked at me out of my head, he was so happy"

"Did they treat him badly?" Donnie asks protectively but I knew that wasn't the case. 

"Of course they didn't. Lillian would never mistreat, or allow someone to mistreat a child. I'm sure it broke her heart that you took him away," Cade interrupts, making himself known in the room as everyone else kind of forgot about him. _Or at least I did._

"That bitch doesn't have any business keeping him!" Raph curses and as soon as the words leave his mouth Cade is in his face. 

"Don't you ever talk about her that way again!" he yells, and not even a second later, Codey starts crying again. I grab him from Raph's grip, but he won't budge. His focus is on Cade's and they weren't breaking-- I needed to get the baby out of the room. _Now._

"Why not? She was apart of this whole deal and so were fuckin' you!" Raph is quick to fire back his insults, and Cade shoves my brother so hard that he stumbles back, ignoring the screaming toddler in his arms. 

"Raph!" I shout at him but he continues. 

"You don't even know the story so shut your fucking mouth!"

"Man, you're pussy whipped so I'll be shuttin' my mouth when ya choose to not lie to your own goddamn family!" Raph argues, finally allowing me to take Codey but I don't think he even notices much less cares. 

I quickly hand him to Donnie and tell him to leave the room but he refuses, only standing a few feet away from the commotion. I worry that this is going to get violent if Raph doesn't shut his mouth. We knew Cade for awhile now, but I've never seen him actually fight and I keep remembering the time that he told us that he was stronger than both me and Raph combined because of how old he was. I didn't wanna risk Raph getting hurt. _Not again._

Raph was practically fuming at this point and I could see the smoke forming at the tips of his fingers already and I thought about it for a moment, seeing the chaos burn in my mind the moment my brother goes up in flames. He'd burn this place down, and then he'd be filled with more regret than last time because now, there was more at risk than just some house. 

I move in between my brother and my friend, cutting my eyes straight up at him. I didn't care about Raph's next move, all I cared about was getting Cade away from him. But when he saw the look in my eyes he took two steps back, finally realizing that this wasn't the place and time to start a fight. My fists were practically vibrating at the sight of him. I was already upset that he lied. But hurting Raph would be his final mistake. 

"Enough!" I shout, not taking my eyes off of Cade as he takes a few more steps back and to the corner of my eye, peering around and into the room was Leo. He too heard all the yelling and probably rushed down to see what the hell was going on. I couldn't really blame him, "Now is not the time for this, crap!"

"Then tell your sibling to shut his fucking mouth. Because the next time he speaks about Lillian that way-- I promise that he will never speak!" 

Raph begins to make his way towards our friend but I put a hand over his broad chest and he halts at my brave attempt to stop him, "In case you forgot, you lied!" I remind Cade and he looks away from me. The cries from my nephew finally quiet down and even the room dimes a bit.

"I had someone. Someone before I became what I am today-- what I've suffered with for centuries. I was a petty mortal in this fucked up world with nothing but an English degree, dead parents and my own self-pity-- and then her," Cade went on, but trailing off, staring at the ink on his hands, "I met her and we were nothing without one another. You four must understand that, right? Well, if you don't then you wouldn't understand the pain I went through when I lost her in the fire," 

"What fire, Cade?" Donnie questions from the other side of the room, resting Codey on his chest.

"Lillian and I, we started this bookstore together. We had that in common and for years, we spoke about buying our very own place, and it happened. Until one night I left her alone, she stayed in late to sort the storage, thinking she'd be safe and where we lived at the time, it wasn't fucking safe and they-- they broke in and fucking set fire to the place. A bunch of drunk bastards!" he answers, painting a vaguely detailed image in my head and I have to turn my head and look up at Raph to avoid further thought. My brother's face was less angry than before. 

_Thankfully._

"Her name, was Lillian too?" Leo asks, finally joining us in the living room. 

"Yes," Cade nodded with clenched fists, "And _my_ Lillian is in the family tree of the Lillian the rest of you now know personally!"

"Holy shit," I cursed inching my head. 

"Wait, so what does that make _your_ Lillian, Cade?" Donnie continues, his voice sounding softer. 

"My Lillian would be the ancestor to the Anderson family-- Lillian's family was wealthy and filled with sophisticated intellectuals, but she was never apart of that clique. She was quite simple, boring if you'd count it that way but I didn't. I loved everything about her, and if I can get a second chance, I will take it, even if it means losing those I care about also," Cade threats, looking between the four of us as if he's just made the final decision to end the conversation, but of course, Raph wasn't done. 

"It ain't her though," Raph states the obvious and I grab his arm again, but he ignores me, "And you know it," 

"Do you honestly think that I don't know that, Raphael?" Cade shoots back, "But this is me trying again. This is me trying to find peace again. My depression and grief are what got me killed in the first place, and I won't go alone with it again and neither of you will stop me!"

"We aren't trying to stop you, Cayden," Donnie is quick to assure, "This family-- they kidnapped someone near and dear to us. Someone who is also related to someone we will never see again,"

"You will never bring harm to her or her family. If you do, I will not hesitate to stop you myself," Cade threatens one final time before giving another look, "I'm sorry for lying-- I truly am. But I knew that Leonardo was safe under the hands of her family. I know this family and Jameson definitely was a bad seed, but believe me, if I knew that your brother was in any danger, I'd of told you immediately. I needed more time to get to know Lillian. I needed to make sure it was her. I needed to make sure that when you told me about Alaska and the family who had the same last name as her, who had the two siblings, and a mother who died of cancer, was the right one, and it _was,"_

Raph's eyes landed on Leo, only to look away again and shake his head, "We're goin' back to New York tomorrow and that's final," my brother announces going to leave the room, but before he exits, he stops next to our friend, eyeing him closely, "Without you," 

"If that's the way it has to be, then fine," Cade answers without a fight. 

"There's too much to worry about back in Manhattan to go back, Raphael," Donnie says, reaching out for him before he leaves, "I'm in no condition to travel and the egg-- you seem to keep forgetting will not be going anywhere _tomorrow!"_

"I don't care, Donnie!"

"We still have to tell him about our plan, Don," I tell my much taller brother who's still rocking Codey in his arms. He shrugs at me, not sure how to start. 

"What fuckin' plan?" Raph pushes, "What now?"

I look at him and sigh, "We've settled a plan to send Codey to Japan with the Tribunal," 

"What? Who's dumb idea was that?" 

"Mine, dickhead!" I punch his arm, "Earlier, before you and Leo left. I thought about what you said, about how we have our own lives to live and that maybe Codey is better off in a home where people can give him what he needs and the best place in my opinion for that to happen is with the Tribunal. They raised dad, and The Ancient One would take him in a heartbeat,"

"And you agreed to this?" Raph asks Donnie who hesitates at first but then nods. 

"Yeah," he quietly answers, "They'll teach him everything he needs to know. Better than we can,"

_Better than we can._

"Great, wonderful," was all Raph said before he storms out of the room, fuming again. 

I didn't even notice until now, but Cade was no longer with us. The room fell quiet until a small whine left Codey's lips and for the rest of the night, I promised to care for him while Donnie and Leo slept. Raph was missing as well, and right now, I didn't wanna know where he went. This was a habit he never let go of. He wasn't as bad, but he still dragged it along with him. 

The entire night, I held Codey in my arms, rocking him to sleep and feeding him every once in a while and for once, he was at home, in comfort, and with peace. _With us._

I looked out the window, at the night sky and hoped that maybe April was finally proud of us. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	37. ᵂᵃᵗᵉʳ ᵁⁿᵈᵉʳ ᵀʰᵉ ᴮʳⁱᵈᵍᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikey decides to go down memory lane with a clueless Leo which leads him to find even more pieces from his past, including an argument with Raph and then a new face, makes a shocking appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First things first, I wanna apologize for those who have been waiting and waiting for this one to be released. 
> 
> In my life, I've been currently dealing with a lot of stress and bullshittery but I'm moving forward and sticking to the positive route I have no choice but to force myself to live but here it is, another emotional journey continues!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣⱽᴵ

ᵂᵃᵗᵉʳ ᵁⁿᵈᵉʳ ᵀʰᵉ ᴮʳⁱᵈᵍᵉ

**[ Leonardo ]**

I had to leave well enough alone and stop questioning things so early for once. I was with family and that was good enough, right? I've learned to not think about the possibility of getting my memory back and after a week of being in another home, I've learned to just roll with whatever is going on, even if it sounds crazy because when I look in the mirror, that's all I really see, is _crazy._

Raphael, he was uptight and maybe a little intimidating but I could handle that. Donatello, he was smart. That wasn't hard to figure out. Not because of the glasses, but because of the fact that he was always tinkering with something and willing to learn new things. Though he stayed in the basement most of the time and I knew why-- I just didn't really understand the whole egg thing. Raph mentioned that we shared the DNA and that whatever is inside, a baby-- it was mine too which didn't make much sense to me but once again, I'm rolling with whatever freakish thing they throw at me. 

It sounded a little harsh when I put it like that, but I couldn't help but think about how bizarre all of this is and nobody has yet to tell me how we got like this in the first place. We couldn't have just been born like this. It was an impossibility. But I couldn't say that. _Nothing is anymore._

Michelangelo. He was very uppity even though I don't really think that sums him up. He always had a smile on his face no matter the situation, except for when we brought Codey home. He was all protective and very helpful. It's like the world would fall if Mikey wasn't happy and that day I think it _did._ And Cayden, or _Cade._ He was a mystery still. But the way he spoke about himself was interesting enough to not ask further questions like I've been promising myself not to. He was obviously well educated, but when he said something about dying and coming back, I immediately thought zombie, because you know? But no. It was something much worse than that. 

"Goodmorning Leo!" Mikey chirped in my face and I blinked looking up at him from the couch. The television playing in the background caught my attention and I had forgotten what I was watching completely. I tend to be doing that a lot lately. 

"Oh, um," I clear my throat, "Morning!"

"Did you sleep on the couch?" he asks me, staring at the pillows and blankets sprawled out across the cushions. 

"Maybe," I tell him lifting a hairless brow, his blue eyes sparkling curiously at me. 

"You have a bed, dude. Why don't you use it?" 

His question wasn't something I necessarily thought about before. Since I moved into that room, I felt like something was missing and I'd get so frustrated with not being able to figure out what, and then I'd just sneak downstairs and crash on the sofa. 

I gave my younger sibling a tight shrug and lowered my head, looking for the right way to word it, "It feels a little dark if that makes sense," 

"Like, lonely?"

"Yeah, something like that, but I don't know really. The couch is just as good as my bed, but I don't wanna keep fighting with my head, it gets old," 

"Yeah, I uh, I bet you get really fed up with trying to remember crap all the time," he reminds me while my eyes fall down towards the book in his hands that's littered with brightly colored stickers and random pictures of those who I don't know. By the looks of it, Mikey notices and a small giggle slips out of his mouth, "Oh, I kind of wanted to hang with you for a bit and show you something-- at least until Raph and Cade are back from hunting and Donatello is napping right now, so I figured that this was the perfect time to show you one of my favorite things ever!" 

I wanted to ask what he meant by hunting as the idea worried me for only a second as Mikey sits next to me and scoots closer until our legs are touching and on the front of the book that now sits in his lap is a photograph snapped by one of those vintage polaroid cameras. The positive energy that I felt while looking at my own smiling face in the picture was almost nerve-racking for me. In the photo, all three of my brothers including myself were showing off some sort of rewards. They were belts with silver buckles on the front and each one was a different color.

I immediately knew the shortest one on the far right was Mikey as he seemed far too excited for his own good and Raph, who was next to me with an arm swung over Donatello's tall shoulders. We each had different features compared to one another and it was actually pretty satisfying to stare at. We looked happy. _I looked happy._

"Can you tell me what's going on in this one?" I point to the cover and Mikey's smile becomes softly neutral at the memory displayed in front of him. 

"That's when we got our black belts in ninjitsu. It was your proudest day ever! And man was Splinter happy that day" my brother laughs, not taking his eyes off the picture. 

_Splinter._

"Who's Splinter?" 

Mikey looked at me as if he was offended and I immediately figured that he or she was someone very important. Someone I _should_ remember, "Splinter, Master Splinter was our um, our Sensei, our rat Dad," Mikey answers me with another smile, but this one was quite sad but he brushed it off, lowering his head into the book again, finally opening it. 

_Rat._

"Oh," I exhaled as the images of my late dream came in waves behind my eyes, "I-I think I remember him,"

Mikey's eyes find mine again, but this time they were more alarmed than excited, "You remember, Sensei?" his voice is quiet, but loud enough to understand.

I nod my head, knitting my brows together in confusion, "I had a dream about him. It was strange but good. He led me to remember what I was capable of doing with my blades. He even reminded me of my name, though I don't understand why I'm named after such a famous painter,"

"Sensei has always had those types of capabilities. It's like he's always with us even after what happened. I sometimes see him too, whether it be in my sleep or just in real-time. He knows we miss him," Mikey says and suddenly I'm hit with a blow of pain in my heart. It ached and I hadn't known why because it was as if my brother's words had triggered something I couldn't understand right away. _At least not now._

This was my _Father_ he was speaking about. Maybe not my real one, but the one that raised me and my brothers to be who I'm guessing we are today. _Did something happen to him?_

"Mike," I begin, "Where _is,_ Sensei?"

Mikey's fingers ran over the pictures in the book and suddenly stopped when I asked such a delicate question. I immediately regret it. But I had to know if my thoughts stood me correctly.

Those big blue eyes met mine once again, "He passed a couple of months ago, Leo," Mikey's voice was so soft, but it hurt my chest more. The ache burned deep within me and I couldn't feel anymore irritated than I already was. I wanted to remember. I wanted to see everything again. 

"H-How?" I stutter and Mikey's lips press into a hardline. 

"He was shot," he trailed off, closing the photo album, "It was the night of April's baby shower. It was at least a week after we left the lair. Raph or even you would say Sensei kicked us out, but at the time I didn't really have control of the situation," 

"Why did we leave?" 

Mikey's face continues to stay neutral but unhappy at the subject, "He didn't approve of our sexual preferences and you didn't wanna put up with that. So, we left because the only thing we really did back then was obeying you, considering you were the one who ran the show. I never really minded it though," he finally smiles. 

_Ran the show? Like, a leader._

"Our father, he was special, wasn't he?" I ask my brother and he nods at me. 

"He taught us everything we know, Leo, of course, he was special," he says with such honor in his voice but is brought on with a frown, "I just wish I was able to stop his death,"

"You said he was shot?"

"Yeah, I saw it happen only to later find out that it was a mistake brought on by somebody who didn't follow orders from an old enemy who's actually an ally now," he laughs sadly but straightens his spine, sucking it up with a heavy inhale, "The guy who shot Splinter was right in front of us later on that week and you refused to kill him because you knew it'd make us look bad in his image. You said you didn't wanna drop down to a murderer's level,"

My dream, I could see it again. It was more of a nightmare now than a normal dream. I could see my father's face, it was blank with no emotion and on the front of his robe was a large round wound seeping of blood. The S-shaped logo on the shoulder faded into the back of my mind and vanished when Mikey grabbed my hand and made me jump. He was staring up at me a little taken back, "O-Oh, I'm sorry. I was just um, thinking"

"You know, I'd like to hear what's on your mind? You don't have to be afraid to talk to anyone around here. Though I don't think you'd be as comfortable talking about things with Raph since he well, uh, ya know," Mikey giggles, covering his mouth. 

The surface of my cheeks immediately turns a shade of red and I caress the back of my neck, already feeling the dampness from how nervous I've gotten since Mikey sat down next to me, "Right, _that._ I guess something like that doesn't really stay hidden, huh?"

"Unfortunately no. Not since we've taken the next step in our relationship and well after April passed mostly," he shrugs and I stare at him a little too long until I'm embarrassing myself further. Mike was actually adorable. Especially when he smiled or laughed. I've already spoken about it, but it could lighten any mood and I could definitely see what the fuss about our relationship was about and what it was already creating for me. 

I didn't understand it. But I couldn't just sit here and not try to. In fact, I didn't really mind learning about it. We were what we are and finding someone to love was probably a lot different than actual human connection. I still remember the look Lillian gave me when she saw me the first time, including Andy and Felix. It was a big surprise and perhaps one of the most terrifying experiences for them and to be honest, I couldn't blame them for feeling that way with me. 

I'm still pretty afraid of not only myself but the people around me. I feel like I should be. But then again, my heart tells me differently while my head is still telling me to fear everything about this.

"Why did things end up like this?" I question my brother again and he releases a breath of air, sounding quite amused by my words. 

"Depends on what you mean by that, fearless?" he chuckles, leaning back into the sofa cushions.

"Mike, that question could mean a million things. Like," I trail off standing up, _"Us,_ how'd we end up like this, were we human before? Did we all lead different lives? Or just, the whole incest thing-- how the heck did that happen?" 

_"Heck,"_ Mikey laughs again and I catch myself scowling at him but look away as he shakes his head at me, "I can answer two of those for you, Leo, but one of them doesn't have an answer,"

_Was he making fun of me?_

I sit back down, feeling slightly nervous again. I knew I didn't know Mikey all that well, but I felt like I should. In fact, I wanted to know him better. I could repeat the same words a thousand times in my head where I wished I could remember everything from before, but nothing came. 

I catch Mikey staring at me and when he looks away I feel like a tomato, "So, start?" I tell him bashfully as my fingers fidget in my lap.

"We weren't humans before all this," he answers waving his hands in the air over his own body, "We were born as regular turtles, and we ended up as test subjects pretty much. Our father was one too and you should know what happens when animals end up as the lab's guinea pigs,"

"We were experimented on?" I ask him, though I obviously know the answer. I just wanted to hear it loud and clear for why I look the way I look. 

"Yep and then April, who was a kid at the time saved us. She put us in the nearest sewer, which is where we ended up for the first fifteen years of our lives. Sensei saw what he worded as _great spirit_ in you, and you became our leader, our mentor. And Raph hated it," Mikey sighed, picking at the fabric on the couch, "But he got over it. He had no choice but to,"

"A mentor? Did I teach you anything worth learning?" 

I wanted to mention the whole Raph thing but I could understand why he probably hated the idea of me being in control. I mean look at the guy-- he was built for the job. But filled with so much hatred, I wish I understood why. 

"Well, yeah, dude!" he laughs and for a moment I wanted to join him, "You taught us to not get our shells kicked with league ninjitsu and karate. And well, some other pretty cool things too,"

That explains my dream in a small portion along with my weapons that I haven't touched since I got here, which is odd. Because when I was at Felix and Lillian's, I wanted them. I felt the connection and need to hold them. Plus pining an apple to the wall wasn't exactly something I had planned that morning.

"Well then," I exhaled, not really knowing what to say or do. I just wanted to know more.

"I know, I know, not really all that impressing! But still, we got this far with you," he nudges me and I give him a warm smile that is surely interrupted with another blush on my cheeks. 

Mikey's smile slowly fades at me, "As I said, Leo, I can only answer two of the questions you asked me. I don't like calling it incest and that might be what it means to you, but we don't think of it that way-- it's something more. On top of that, the only blood-related brothers in the family are you and Don. I and you or Raph aren't actually related, unfortunately-- at least not as we thought,"

I looked away for a moment and I figured that now was the time to finally stop asking questions and being so curious. In reality, I only had one sibling-- but we continued being a family even after they found this out. It was loyalty but love all at the same time. I'm sure it was devasting for us at the time. 

"I'm sorry for calling it _that._ I'm just still trying to understand all of this and it's still pretty strange to me," I said being completely sincere. Or at least trying to. 

"You're not the only one," he remarks with a smirk and tilting his head at me, "I miss our times together,"

"I-I'm sure you do," I stammer as Mikey's grin never fails to disappear. 

_What the hell was he thinking?_

"Are you nervous, Leo?" my brother teases while scooting himself closer.

"Maybe a little. I've been doing that a lot lately as well. I'm not sure why," I shrug trying to relax, but he isn't making it easy on me, "I guess that comes with the whole trying to discover yourself thing"

"I mean, you did it once. You can do it again," he reassures me while curling his fingers around my hand and for once, I don't feel so uncomfortable. I loved feeling his grip and contact. It was refreshing to have such a gentle soul next to me and in Michelangelo, I could see it clear as day. 

"Can I though? I honestly feel like a burden sometimes," I admitted shamelessly and turned my head away from him, but he wouldn't let me. I felt his hand on my cheek and I could hear my heart thudding away in my ears when he had moved closer. I wasn't even sure of what was happening to be honest, but either way, I wanted to see the outcome. I had to test the waters.

Mikey's eyes fall to mine and his beak touches mine, rubbing it, "Do you have any idea how much we missed you? How much we worried," he sighs painfully at the reminder, "We went out day after day searching for you! Raph, he wanted to keep looking but I had really thought you were gone. I didn't wanna tell Don that, but it's true. I thought we lost you,"

My heart pounds harder and the heat in my body isn't from embarrassment anymore. It's filled with the warmth you'd wanna keep in you forever. This family-- whatever we are made of, they trusted their gut and never gave up the hope, the search in wanting me back, to nurture me back to life like a real family is meant to do. Somewhere deep inside, I felt like I had never had that before and here in front of me, it was.

I nuzzled my brother back, feeling oddly inexperienced but timid about what I wanted to do and I think Mikey sort of knew and before I could say anything his mouth was on mine, turning things into a much more heated kiss than the one Raph gave me. I liked both. Mikey's lips were soft, playful and most importantly _eager._ Raph had that about him too, minus the playful part. But he was filled with greed which shared a common thrive for lust and dominance. I loved it. 

Mikey giggled against my lips and my eyes widened with surprise, "That definitely wasn't expected," he muses at me with another chuckle. Mikey's hand lingered on my cheek for the longest time until I hushed him with another kiss, allowing this one to last. 

I was crazy with curiosity. Insane probably but I'm a big hypocrite for this. One minute I'm finding it _disgusting--_ the next I'm confused and _appalled_ by it and now, I just want it. I want all of what they have to offer and I don't even remember if I'm a virgin or not. But that was a pretty dumb thought too though. 

_Why do you care so much?_

"This entire thing wasn't expected," I tell my brother before caressing his cheek light enough to slide my hand down, allowing my thumb to brush his lip and for a moment, I'm shocked due to how good he looks like this. He looks ready to be taken, ready to be told what to do and he'll _do_ it and the way he opens his mouth and sucks in the tip of my thumb nearly makes me jump him right here right now. 

"Looks like you two are havin' fun," the voice is booming in my head a lot louder than I'd like to admit and when Mikey's blue eyes leave mine, I only follow and see the brooding turtle in the doorway.

Mikey nuzzles my neck and I breathe in sharply at the contact but the embarrassment from being caught catches up with me and I flush deeply, avoiding Raphael's sharp stare. 

"Yeah, we were, till you interrupted," the smaller turtle huffs dramatically as he swirls his finger around the patterns of my plastron. 

Raph moves into the room, closing in on the both of us and before I know it, he yanks Mikey from the couch, forcing him to stand up next to him, "I gave you strict orders about this stuff, Mikey! Do I need to tell ya again?"

"Orders?" I say out loud but originally thinking them mostly. 

My fuming brother glances down at me, "Yes, Leo, fuckin' orders that you wouldn't understand!"

"Don't say that to him," Mikey quickly defends me as I stand up next to him, "He feels bad enough that he can't remember!"

"I don't give a shit when I give an order, I expect you to do it!" Raph growls and I feel sort of frustrated from the sudden outburst, "You know the risks, and you still do this even after what happened with Donnie!"

"Hey-- there's no need to get so hostile about this," I butt in, keeping my temper at it's lowest because I honestly had no idea what I was up against here, "He was just showing me some things, nothing really happened,"

Raph moves in front of Mikey replacing my little brother's smaller form with his much larger one, and his eyes never leave mine. His greenish-brown orbs are deep-set as he stares at me with intensity, "I know ya don't remember shit, Leo, but if ya did, then you'd know the risks, the consequences behind what could happen if you and Mikey fucked around!" 

"Like what, it's not like he could kill me," I laugh in his face and his glare thickens. 

"Actually--"

"Raph!" Mikey yells at him, "Enough, this isn't needed right now and you know it. And Leo, maybe you can go check on the egg in the basement. I know you haven't seen it and I'm sure Donnie would appreciate if you'd check the incubation to ensure it's working okay," 

I look at my brother's with suspicion but ignore the tension that Mikey was obviously trying to keep me from and I nod my head, "Are you two gonna be alright?" I can't help but ask, ignoring Raph's face splitting glare. 

"Yes, we'll probably head out and grab a few things,"

"I just got back!" Raph argues and the grip on his arm only tightens. 

"Well, I wanna go out and you're gonna come with me, so sue me!" he smiles at our taller sibling and turns to leave. With a heavy look from Raph, he follows anyway and I sigh loudly when I'm left alone as the door closes. 

Things happen rather quickly around here and I don't know whether I should love or hate it. I wished I had more time with Mikey-- but I'm sure I'll get it some other time or maybe try and understand why Raphael is such a dick. 

I make my way to the basement, leaving the door open and walking down the creaky staircase until I spot the incubation thing resting on a cluttered table of tools that illuminated a neon purple light and inside, I saw the egg. I was a bit taken back by the sight of it alone, but up close after I've heard so much about it, I didn't expect it to be so big and oddly beautiful. 

I moved closer, mesmerized. On the bottom, it had what I assumed was some sort of temperature settings. It was so very high tech and nothing like I had ever seen before. I found myself lifting my hand and reaching to touch the glass, but another creak from the staircase stops me and I turn quickly to find Donnie standing there. His shirt appeared baggy which hung low at his waist and covering the top of his thin muscular thighs. 

"I wasn't expecting to find you down here," he greets distracting me momentarily. 

"I-I um, did you make this?" I asked, pointing at the incubation box and Donnie nods with a smile while walking over. 

"Yes, does that surprise you?" he answers, changing the dials on the box and adjusting his glasses with the other hand. 

"Uh, oh, no!" I shake my head watching him, "I've heard how smart you are, I just didn't think your inventions were this good. I-I mean, I knew they were good, b-but not like this, this is incredible!"

Donnie softly laughs at my stammering and I feel myself flushing again, "You're so different now, Leo," he then sighs allowing his small smile to fade but not taking his eyes off of the egg, "Sometimes I'll forget how different you are and then when I see you, I'm reminded that when you look at me, you have no idea who I am, or what we were," 

His words punctured a hole straight through my heart and the only thing I could say was, "I know, and I'm sorry," 

Donnie scoffs and turns to me, "What are you apologizing for? It wasn't your fault that you lost your memory"

"Raph words it differently than you," I tell him, not hiding the harsh tone in my voice. 

"Yeah, he does," he shakes his head, looking back at the egg from the side, "I'm sorry about him, he can't accept this as I have, but it _has_ been difficult,"

"You're telling me," I agree, "I want to, don't think I don't. But I do, Donatello, I wanna remember,"

"I know," he nods, moving things around on the table, "Enough of the heavy-- what uh, what do you think of her?" 

_Her?_

"Oh, it's a girl?" I question with a surprising amount of excitement.

"Yes," he breathes out the words as if he's been holding them in for ages, "We decided with Venus for the name awhile ago, before well, what happened,"

"That's a pretty name," I say letting my eyes wander back to the egg and something about it kept pulling me in as if its aura was smothering me. It didn't make any sense, but I could feel it. 

"Yeah, I just wish you were there," he admits, still not looking at me. 

I grab Donnie by the wrist and he looks at me and winces, "I wanted to be there, I may not know how this works-- us! And I'm supposedly a father and that's unbelievable to think about, Donatello, but believe me when I say it-- I wanted to, alright?"

His eyes move from mine to the hand that's currently gripping his wrist and as soon as I notice, I release him and I see the fading dark circles of blue on his forearm, "D-Did I do that?" 

Donnie quickly pulls the sleeve of his shirt down far enough to cover the marks and I stop him, "No, no you didn't do that, Leo, I've had them for a while,"

"How'd you get them?" I immediately question, this time my tone sounding serious, "Who the hell hurt you?"

Donnie's eyes find mine again while he's organizing around the room which I assumed was just a distraction for him, "Nobody hurt me, Leo. It just kind of happened, and I allowed it,"

"What do you mean you allowed it?"

I stared at him for a moment and during this, a loud noise erupts from upstairs, but I ignore it and figure that maybe it was our brother's coming home, "Did you hear that?" Donnie says brushing my words off as if he didn't hear me. 

"Donnie, what do you mean!" I ask for the second time grabbing his hand. 

Donatello's expression goes from pained to confused and he isn't looking at me, but at someone else in the room. I follow his eyes and see what he's so caught up about and at the bottom of the stairs, a tall male with dark shaggy hair and on his face is a large scar that goes down his left brow and over his eye. In his hand was a gun. It wasn't a big one, but a magnum possibly. 

I turned myself towards him, keeping Donnie and the egg well hidden behind me. His face and the way he was staring at the both of us seemed and felt all too familiar, but I couldn't place it. 

_Who the hell was this guy?_

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	38. ᵂᵃᵗᵉʳ ᵁⁿᵈᵉʳ ᵀʰᵉ ᴮʳⁱᵈᵍᵉ ᴾᵃʳᵗ ²

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Water Under The Bridge continues.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣⱽᴵᴵ

ᵂᵃᵗᵉʳ ᵁⁿᵈᵉʳ ᵀʰᵉ ᴮʳⁱᵈᵍᵉ ᴾᵃʳᵗ ²

**[ Leonardo ]**

"You must have hit your head pretty fuckin' hard to forget who I am, freak!" the shaggy man spits at me while holding the gun in his hand as steady as he can. I could visibly see his fingers shivering behind the trigger, but he _knew_ what he was doing and it wasn't something hard to misplace when it was right here in front of you. 

It was just another situation like all the others. This person was someone I _should_ know. But I didn't, of course. 

"How'd you find us?" Donnie questions the guy, sounding unlike I've ever heard him. His voice was completely on the edge, cutting itself off. 

"Don, who is this man?" I mumble to him but my brother ignores me, making sure to position himself in front of the incubation box. He didn't want this man seeing the egg for some reason. 

_Is that what he was after?_

"Yeah, _Don,"_ he mocks, shuffling a little closer but I keep my ground, "Why don't ya tell him who I am, or do I need to explain it the much slower way-- like how that _rat_ of yours went down like a fuckin' pussy!"

I hear a growl erupt from Donatello but he doesn't move. I notice how his fists are clenched and then it all clicks, "This is-- this is the guy?" I say but all too quietly again, not really knowing if my words were audible enough to hear. 

"I've waited months for this moment and after week after week of following the four of you, I've finally gotten my chance, and here I am," the man goes on, waving the gun around.

"I think it's best you leave," I tell him, keeping my voice down, "If you know what's good for you,"

"Hah, are you kiddin' me? I wouldn't dare step foot out of here without doin' what I planned to do since Bishop fired me and on top of that, he put me on the board's hit list. Do you know what's that like, when you're an ex fucking con? Do you! No, of course, ya don't because your lives are just fuckin' peachy!" he shouts, making my temper worsen by each word that comes out of his mouth, "Now, enough of the fucking chit-chat," he sniffs, wiping his nose as it is clear that he's on some sort of drugs. 

"Did you hear what Leo said? It's best if you leave before something awful happens!" Donnie yells back, moving in front of me and I grab him but I immediately avert my hand when a spark is sent up my arm making me gasp loudly. 

When I look at Donatello again to find out what the hell just happened, I see the bolts of electricity swirling around and up to his arms. They are brightly colored in purple layers and the bolts go from his arms to his throat, sparkling brightly at his fists, "Donnie?"

The expression on the man's face twists for only a moment and he isn't fazed, "I don't take orders from anyone anymore!" he shouts over the click of his gun and I'm quick to react but Donnie blocks me. 

"Leo, I want you out of here," my brother demands but trailing off as his fists spark, "Take Venus with you,"

"No!" I declare, moving to go in front of my brother, practically yearning to protect him, but his arms and the sharp static of lighting block me again. It's all happening so fast when Donnie raises his arms, releasing a shard of electricity at the man but it was too late. The gun fired twice leaving a trail in its wake. 

My heart was thudding in my chest so fast I don't remember breathing but I didn't have a point to anymore. I felt like I was floating in nothing and when I turned my head to look at my brother, everything I ever feared came back to me. A single bullet wound sat between Donatello's eyes and the other had grazed his skull. I knew then that the pounding in my chest had officially stopped. The colorful patterns littering my brother's skin had slowly faded from dark to nothing in a matter of minutes after he was shot and for a second, and only a second I saw him look at me, his eyes pooling with tears as a trickle of blood drips down the base of his nose. 

I went from feeling utterly broken to numb at the sight of Donatello collapsing to the floor. My own tears had surfaced, pouring down my face as I turned to look at the man who just murdered my brother. His hand was shaking even more now and he looked pale and full of regret. 

I could feel something different in myself, something different rising-- deepening and exploding as I launch my body at him, clawing for his throat but by the time I get my hands on him, my vision is going from red to white than black. His screams of plea and guilt disappear in behind me and become only a void that I no longer gave a fuck for. 

Around me, I saw things I couldn't put together. More puzzle pieces in the fog of my brain. _Again._

I punched at the wall, then the ground, butchering my knuckles until it's skin and bone and gushing of blood. Why'd it take me away now? Why'd I have to forget now! Why did it have to be me that didn't fucking remember! Why! _Tell me fucking why!_

I was arguing with my echoing thoughts and in the distance, I could hear a faint cry. 

The world around me was nothing but smoke and raging clouds and right before me, was a much smaller version of myself. He too was bloody, and around his head, complimenting his massive navy eyes was a mask. A blue bandana with Japanese Kanji painting the ends.

I stretched my hand out and he mocked my movements, connecting our fingers together which caused him to disappear like everything else. The walls were like pools of water and the vanishing expression on myself was ill and angry. 

I wanted to yell and blame the world and my selfish ways for how I ended up here. I wanted to speak for myself, but I couldn't find my voice. I couldn't find my heart or the very thing that kept my mind intact. 

I closed my eyes for only a minute, seeing Donnie's face over and over again and when I opened my eyes, the world around me was once more different. I saw a field completely covered in flowers of countless colors. I could feel the wind crisp on my skin and the sun beating down on me and in the middle of that ball of nature was all four of us. I and my brothers sat together, laughing and bickering about things I couldn't understand. I couldn't even hear our voices but only our amusement. The laughter continued on our smiling faces along with continuous glares from the hothead in the group. 

It was beautiful and all too satisfying with the way Donatello was leaning against my chest, playing with the tails of the mask on my face and how he'd peer up at me for a kiss that I'd gladly give him. Mike and Raph were a riot together. Always play fighting and making their love for one another all too obvious while me and Don were tamed to the beauty of it. We looked like nothing could touch us and this place looked completely hidden from the world I knew we hated. 

The wetness on my cheeks made me blink the fading memory away but my mind wasn't done. It was far from being done with me. I heard yelling-- maybe a hint of crying again as the smoke and dark images span around me in a circle. 

_"I didn't wanna do it like this--"_

My own voice was playing in my head again. Reminding me. 

_"I wanted to make a plan, but we're all so stressed out over it-- you came back, like this, while we were just starting out with who we now are, and I'm so sorry you had to find out like this, Master Splinter, but-- we're together, and when I say together, I mean, together!"_

_"Is this true, Donatello?"_ Splinter asked. 

_"Y-Yeah, it is, Sensei. We're Gay,"_

Donatello's voice sounded like it was quivering and begging to be heard. I so badly wanted to see his smiling face again, but I don't think I'll ever get to. Ever. 

The room was spinning again and this time I felt sick but not throw up sick, mentally sick. I was hearing more and more voices and seeing things I didn't know I'd ever see and from behind it felt like someone had kicked me and I fell to my knees pounding my fists into the floor. I was blinking rapidly and I felt my heart snapping into. 

_"Is it, April, Mikey?"_

_"Y-Yeah,"_

_"Is she alright?"_ my voice was questioning in my head, echoing all around me. 

_"And the baby?"_ Raph's tone was much clearer, sounding serious.

Mikey sniffled and I saw his tear-stained cheeks, _"Baby is okay,"_

 _"Then where the fuck is April?"_ Raph's yelling shatters my eardrums. 

_"She died!"_ came Donatello's sobs. 

I pounded my fists at the ground, silently begging for this to stop as I'm seeing his crying face mixing with my own and I shout, allowing the noise to finally release from my throat. 

But then I saw something more. Something intimate and pure. The images were coming at me from every other direction, hitting me in the face. I saw Raph's lips on me, mine on Donnie's and Mikey's twisted, lustful expression as I emptied myself into him. I stood, frozen, and riddled with confusion until my mind was forced towards a scene that I wished I hadn't missed. 

I saw Donnie again and everyone but me was there comforting him. He was crying in pain and Raph was behind him, holding him and saying a whole bunch of things in his ear to calm him down. I wasn't there. I felt myself battling to get through, to get in there and promise them I'll never leave again, that I'll never forget. 

I could see it all happening right before my eyes. The egg-- the pain and misery but ending with pure joy and happiness and I could hear my brother cooing on to Donnie, _"I know you're holdin' back-- I miss him too,"_

I wanted the voices out of my head and away from me. It drove me to the point of insanity. 

_"We can do this, we can get through this, fuck, Don, you're the strongest person I know, and you've handled so much worse, you can do this, for Leo,"_

At the sound of my name, I felt my heart again. It forced me back into reality and in front of me, I saw the first sight of the egg and the look on Donatello's was nothing but satisfaction and warmth. He looked completed. Hell, the whole group did, except something was missing. 

_Me._

I wanted to be as close as I was before. I wanted to be there with them when they too first saw it. Saw her, saw Venus. As I moved forward, yearning to be right there next to them, I saw the shadowed figure on the inside of the egg and holding a hand up, pressing right against the inner shell of her protective dome. The three small fingers spread out, curling, and reaching out to me. 

_"Leo!"_

The screams returned and my mind, my vision, and concentration all go blank until I feel the power surging through my veins, rising beneath my skin and then a hand on my forearm. The touch was soft and securing and when I opened my eyes again, I was right back where it all started. Donnie was here. He was _alive._

I blinked rapidly at him as he moved in front of me, repeating what I had already seen and the man with the gun forced images of my dying father into my mind. I saw myself yelling and cursing as I stood over him in the pouring rain as my brother's surrounded me, sobbing themselves sick. I could feel the guilt pouring over my head and then it all came back to me. 

_Every last bit of it._

To my right on the table, I picked up a screwdriver, gripping it tight in my hand as I moved before Donnie, flipping him over my shoulder and down my shell, knowing and already planning in my head that he'd land flat on his feet. I readied my arm, twisting the sharp object in my fist and before the man could draw his gun back, I threw the weapon. 

My brother behind me was totally winded from what just happened and when he finally came to and turned towards me, I was on top of the guy and knocking the gun from his hand. It slid across the ground as I pulled the screwdriver out of his shoulder and plunged it right back in, making him grunt loudly in pain as he kicks his feet against my heavy body. 

"Get off me, freak!" he shouts in my face. 

"Shut up!" I spit in return, rearing my arm back and punching him in the jaw which knocks him out mid-scream, and by the time I crawl off of his body I'm panting heavily from the force and everything happening so quickly. I then slowly face my brother who looked shocked, "Are you alright, Don?"

His facial expression is a mystery but he nods his head, "I-I'm alright. Are you alright?" 

"Better than I'll ever be," I shrugged with a small chuckle as Mikey ran down the stairs with Raph in behind him. My little brother was in a panic and when Raph saw the guy on the floor, seeping blood he too was a little riddled. 

"The fuck happened?" he questioned. 

"We were gone for ten minutes-- who the hell is that?" Mikey began but stopped himself as I stepped over the body. 

"We were attacked by the fuckwit who shot dad," I simply answered them both, rubbing the back of my neck and popping it, "I don't know how he got in here. Where the hell were you two?" the anger in my voice was clear but not enough until I scowled at my brother's silently.

The look on Donatello's face was oblivious to what I just said but my other two brothers stuck to themselves and looked at me like I was stupid. Not this again. 

"Are you guys even listening to me?" I question harshly while raising my hand in order to get their attention as I point at the body on the floor, "How the hell did he get in here and why weren't either of you on watch!"

"Are you even listenin' to _yourself,_ Leo?" Raph asked me with sarcasm laced in his tone. 

In front of me, Donatello looked as if he was going to start crying and I felt confused again. What just happened and how _did_ I miss it? 

"Y-You remembered," Donnie finally croaks, his voice sounding broken. 

"Remembered? Well, yeah. Of course I--" I stopped talking mid-sentence realizing what the hell he was on about and it was true. I _did_ remember. I remembered everything. 

Donatello ran forward, nearly tripping over his own feet to leap into my arms and I caught him nearly falling back from his landing. "It's really you!" he weeps, tightening his grip around me. 

"I-It's really me," was all I could say before I felt Mikey crashing into my side to embrace me as well.

"I thought we'd never see the real you again, Leo!" my little brother says into my arm, squeezing me just as tight. 

"Look, I get it. Leo's back," Raph gripes, crossing his arms, "The reunion can wait. First, we need to figure out how the hell he got here, and most importantly, we need to find out how the fuck he found us in the first place!"

I looked at him, mocking his eyes, "Missed you too, prick," I sneered, kissing the top of Donnie's head, "Where's Cade, maybe he had something to do with it,"

"Impossible. He left with Codey a couple of hours ago. Lillian wanted to see him again and well, Codey needed diapers and stuff," Mikey answers for me after pulling himself out of my arms and spoiling my thoughts.

"Okay then, both of them are no longer a potential witness which leaves it all at a mystery. Until he wakes up, someone needs to restrain him and make sure he doesn't get away if he tries which I don't think he'll be doing anytime soon," I order, looking down at the unconscious man. 

"He told me and Leo that he had been following us for a while. But I don't know how long _a while_ is, so only God knows what he found out during the last few months," Donnie admits, keeping his grip on me as I look over and see the egg again, allowing the wild images in my mind return. 

I find myself walking over to it and finally touching the outer layer of the incubation dome. I may have not been there when she was born, but I saw and felt her energy right before my eyes. I could feel how much she needed me, how angry she'd be if I gave up. Like Sensei. He wanted to not only remind me of who I was, but who I can be as a father, a brother, a lover, and a leader. 

He always found a path to show me the way. Even from the afterlife he never failed to. 

I turn my head and look right at Donatello, "I saw everything that happened,"

"What do you mean, Leo?" he asks me, his eyes filling with concern. 

I watch as Raph ties the hands of the unconscious man and props him up in a wooden chair in the corner of the basement, "I saw him kill you," I point at the man, "He shot you right between the eyes," my voice fell quiet as I turned back towards the incubation box, "I saw so many things that neither of you needed to see. Things that we've already seen and felt, but I felt them again times ten,"

"What things?" I heard my little brother question as he moved closer and to my left, I felt his hand on my arm, attempting to comfort me, though I didn't think I needed it. 

"I saw both good and bad memories, like that time you broke your arm skateboarding after dark," I look at Mikey and he smiles at the reminder.

"Yeah, that really sucked,"

"I saw the moments we had in the field back home and Japan," my face twisted in thought, "Then when we came out to dad. When me and Raph thought the two of yous were dead, and of course, April, Codey, until now," I looked at my brothers who were intent on listening to me, "I fucking saw that bastard kill you, Donnie and then when I went to attack him something happened-- something strange enough that allowed me to save your life!"

 _"Time travel,"_ was the only two words that slipped from Don's lips to my head and it all made sense but why me? Was this my chi? My abilities? Was this was dad was warning me about?

"Man, things just keep gettin' better around here," Raph snorts, eyeing the man in the chair and giving him a single punch on the cheek which amused him. 

"We need him alive," I warn him, walking over, "Which means no hitting him!" 

"Who the fuck cares, he tried ta kill Donnie, Leo!" 

"I know!" I stop him, raising my voice, "I know more than anyone in this room you dick! I saw him do it and believe me, I'd love nothing more than to kill him right here right now. But we need him alive. We need to figure out why he was following us. However, I probably know why, but it won't tell me anything I don't already know,"

Raph rolls his eyes at me, "Things were better before," 

"Raph!" Mikey shoots at him and the glare on both of our faces fight for dominance. 

"Stay out of this, Mike," Raph tells him while standing up straight and getting right in my face, "You were better off without your memory. Wanna know why? Because you were always a bigger dick than me when you are yourself. Pushin' people around even when it don't seem like it, but when you came to, the only thing you fuckin' focused on was this sack of shit!" he jabs a finger at the man in the chair and a deep frown forms on my face.

I lowered my head and looked away from my taller sibling who kept the harsh look on his face, "You don't understand," I sigh, keeping my voice much lower now.

"I don't understand?" my brother fumes, "I don't understand, Leo! You gotta be jokin' right? When I was the one that saw him die first! I told everyone from the beginning that havin' this kid would kill him and look, it fuckin' did!" 

"I saved him!" I shout in his face, my temper practically exploding.

"Guys!" Donnie shrieks, sliding in between us, "Please, don't do this," he begs, looking at Raph and then at me, our eyes meeting and his green ones burning into mine, "Please!" 

Raph didn't stop looking at me as I walked away, ignoring the tense situation. I quickly came to realize that getting my head straight was both the worst and best decision I ever made. 

_Welcome Home, Leo._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	39. Sᵗᵒⁿᵉˢ ᵁⁿᵗᵘʳⁿᵉᵈ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jumping into Leo's point of view once again, things tapper off when he and Donatello have a deep conversation about what happened and things lead to a very promising night with many approaching emotions, including a rebel fearless leader and a reveal you'd never guess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello, I have returned for another episode and yes, this one will include smut so you're lucky I'm giving you a warning because this will be the only one I'll be givin' ya, but anyway!
> 
> I wanna apologize once again for taking longer than usual to upload this one, but here lately I've been really taking my time with getting chapters out and of course, getting my work done because I don't wanna tire myself and veer off from this fandom like I've been doing. But I can't do that because I just love these four that much. 
> 
> (Plus I see them on my wall every time I wake up so no excuses!)
> 
> I really hope you enjoy reading a soft served lesson with our fearless leader, a usual aggressive Raphael and a very needy Donnie!
> 
> I'll see ya in the next one, Cowabunga! 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣˣⱽᴵᴵᴵ

Sᵗᵒⁿᵉˢ ᵁⁿᵗᵘʳⁿᵉᵈ

**[ Leonardo ]**

After a much-needed shower, I make sure all of my usual routines continue from where they were left off at. In the single bedroom, I start from getting dressed in clothing I've grown rather used to and then I give my blades a good sharpen. I could only imagine how long it had been since they were taken care of and since I was ignoring Raph at the moment, I had nothing better to do, honestly. 

He would probably give me shit if he cared enough right now, but I'm glad he didn't. Because I didn't need it right now. I missed my brothers, but I sure as shit didn't miss the physical fights with the only other alpha in the family tree. I wish we didn't, but sometimes I started them too. I couldn't just blame him for every single one that we went through because I was just as bad. 

The things he said to me about my personality being as equal as his own was a little hard to take in because I've been mean in the past and maybe a little harsh on my brothers, but I never knew I could be worse than Raphael himself. I wondered how long he felt that way and did the others feel it too. 

Getting my memory back was only the tip of the iceberg. I had to start improving somewhere else. It was the beginning I had hoped for. Though this one had a bit of a rocky start and I honestly didn't mind because I didn't expect it to be easy. In fact, nothing in a mutant's life was _easy._

After giving my katana's the love and affection they needed, I put them away but eagerly begging to hold them again. It was nearly two in the morning now that I looked at the time and I had no need to keep them on me unless something bad happened, which of course, it shouldn't. However, I wanted to keep an eye out. After that man, Bishops ex-con, broke into the cabin and tried to kill me and Donatello, I didn't wanna risk being caught with my back turned again. 

He had to have people out there with him on his journey and eventually when they notice he's been gone longer than a day, they'll surely come looking for him if they care enough to and that's when we'll end this once and for all. 

The cabin had fallen quiet after the last two hours and when I came down the stairs, the only thing to be heard was the television in the living room, which was where I usually slept. 

I had silently prayed that whoever was in there watching something wasn't Raph. I truly wasn't in the mood to start yelling at him and risk waking up the whole house, including a screaming baby. I had remembered him almost immediately after everything went down. I missed April even more after every passing second, but we had a piece of her with us at all times and the idea of sending him away with the Tribunal wasn't as awful as Donatello made it out to be. I'd miss him, but he would be safe. He'd be secured and away from the violence in our lives. 

As I rounded the corner, I was surprised to see Donnie sitting on the sofa and I released a sound of relief when I approached him, "I thought you'd be Raph," I admit to him, sitting down. 

Donnie rubs his naked eyes and readjusts himself, "No, I'm not _that_ creepy. I was kind of waiting for you," 

"Waiting for me?" I question with a raised brow and he nods placing a hand over mine, "Don, I know you haven't been sleeping well, so why--"

"Because, Leo!" he interrupts me and sighs, "I've missed you a lot and I know you were here before, but now, now you're the real you. The you that we thought we'd never see again. So if that's a crime then I!--"

I cut my brother off with a kiss before he starts rambling on. He gets like this when he's nervous or stressed and right now, you couldn't catch me dead without a smile on my face because I could finally hear it again. These types of things about Donnie used to annoy me, but it was something that you needed after a while. It was the little things that really reminded you why you loved them so much. 

"It isn't a crime," I whisper to him after disconnecting our lips for a moment, "Don't ever think it's a crime for missing someone,"

"If that's the case then I shouldn't be treated like a criminal for the pop tart thing I used to do," he grins, leaning into my chest and I laugh at the memory. 

"You still do that, what're you talking about?" 

Donnie's face turns a little red and he swats my plastron, "Shut up, I don't need Mikey hogging me about that!" 

"Your secret is safe with me ya nerd," I tease him, pressing our snouts together and he churrs happily when we touch.

"This feels so natural, Leo," he whispers, not pulling away from me. 

"I know. Though anything could go wrong at any second," I joke and his grip tightens on my shoulders. 

"Don't jinx it," Donnie says before kissing me again and this time, it's much sweeter and longer-lasting than most times that we've shared. 

Donnie shifted next to me and brought himself closer, wrapping his arm around the back of my neck and pushing our lips tighter together in a heated kiss, "Don," I say in between our contact and he doesn't stop as he climbs into my lap, obviously eager but I can't shake a thought from my head. I grab Donnie by the hand, "Donatello, stop!"

My brother quickly pulls his head back to look at me in shock, "Did I do something?" 

"What? No, I just-- can I ask you something?" 

"Right now?" he chuckles breathlessly, moving in my lap again. 

"Yes, right now," I trail off, looking at his arm, "I wanted to talk about these,"

Donnie's eyes follow mine and he sees that I'm talking about the bruises going up his forearm, "There's nothing to talk about, Leo. Nobody hurt me. It was just Raph and--"

"Raph?" I try to sit up and Donnie pushes me back down, his fingers hard against my chest.

"Yes, and Mikey. We fooled around a couple of times and--"

"You know how dangerous that is!" 

"Would you stop interrupting me!" he whines, squirming in my lap and averting my eyes, "But yes. Yes, Leo, I know how dangerous it was but when I was in that moment, in the middle of all that pain, I just needed them, I needed something to distract me and they were there,"

I stare up at my brother with sincerity in my eyes and I sigh, "That explains why Raph went off on Mikey the other night,"

"Mikey doesn't really care about the boundaries Raph has placed for him and himself," Donnie shrugs, "I don't really care for them either because we all have our needs,"

Hearing his words made me think of only one thing and a small smirk played on my lips, "How long did you need me before Japan?"

Donnie's eye's widened, "Leo!" 

"What I'm just curious? I didn't really think about it all that much. I mean, I still got boners and had thoughts but honestly-- I never did anything about it. But I know you did," I wink at my brother and the flush on his face deepens. 

"I h-had to do research, Leo. How else do think you boneheads woulda learned about the stuff I've taught you?" he jabs a finger into my chest, poking me. 

"Books, Donnie, books," I laughed at him, grabbing his hand. 

"Oh, like Mikey would pick up a book," Donnie snorts, bracing his hands on my shoulders and I joined him. 

"He would if you told him what it was about, but enough about that. You still haven't answered my question, Dona-tello," I remind him, stretching out his name to sound a bit more serious but sarcastic. 

Donnie takes a minute to say anything else but when he does he looks embarrassed, "A couple of years at least,"

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because, Leo, it wasn't exactly easy telling your brother you're in love with him let alone want him sexually-- I mean, I caught Raph and Mike kissing before things really started to come out,"

"When was this?" 

"Oh, um, it was a little bit before me and you threw down in the dojo," he shrugs. 

I sink back into the couch, "How the hell did they do it without me knowing?"

"After I caught them, they stopped fooling around in the lair and when we went to Japan, well-- you and I know what happened next," 

"We were first to do it though," I poke him in the stomach and he giggles. 

"I haven't forgotten," he says looking into my eyes again. 

"Was it good?"

"Leo, come on," he whines again, "You know it was. It was better than good actually,"

"I know, I just like hearing you say it," I admit before reaching up to caress Donnie's cheek and pulling his face down to my level, kissing him again. 

Donnie returned the kiss, deepening it the moment our lips touched and I wrapped my hand around his throat, squeezing tight enough to make him moan on my lips, "What if the others hear us?" he breaks our kiss and I move to his neck, sliding my hand lower. 

"Who cares, Don, let em' hear," I say into the collar of his neck, kissing him there. 

"I-I never really thought about the house full of people," he pants, sliding his arms around my neck again, "The b-baby, _ah~"_

I bite into my brother's neck, leaving wet kisses as I move and then I put my hands on his hips, dipping my fingers underneath his thighs to lift him and myself up from the couch, "Hold on a little longer," I tell Donnie as he wraps himself around me while I carry us up the stairs and to my bedroom. 

"W-We could have done it on the couch," he breathes into my ear, fingers digging into my shoulders as I kick the door shut. 

"Not this time," I tell him mindlessly as I lie my brother across the bed, allowing him to get comfortable on his shell until he pulls me close and I crawl over the mattress on my knees to climb on top of him. Donnie's long legs find their way around me and I'm already grinding my hips in between his thighs. 

"Leo," my brother gasps, opening his mouth for me as I thrust against him and he moans clawing at my arms, "Want it, _want you,"_ he babbles and I nod, having no problem with giving myself to him so eagerly.

I'm quick to get the rest of our clothes off since I was only wearing pajama bottoms and Donnie was still wearing that damn baggy shirt that looked so good on him I didn't really want to take it off but he fussed that it'd be better off on the floor and for now, I agreed as long as he put it back on later. 

While we were on the bed, I just wanted to feel Donnie as close as he was before. I needed to feel his heart against my chest and the softness of his lips on mine. I needed him as he did me and there was no doubt in that. There was also no lying about how much I'd love to just fuck him into the mattress and have him cum in seconds, but with this one, I wanted it to be special. 

Our naked bodies ground into one another and I grabbed both of his hands and forced them above his head as I pushed myself between his thighs and with the perfect angle, I'm already penetrating him at the slowest rate. Donnie's womb was taking in every inch of me and I was already out of breath from how good it felt to finally feel him like this again. 

"Don," I whispered against his throat as he squirmed beneath me and moaned at my length that was now buried and locked inside of him, "Look at me, baby,"

Donnie churred at the nickname and opened his eyes just enough to peer up at me as I slowly pulled my hips back and thrust into him at full force, "L-Leo, please!" he moaned out. 

"I want us to last, Don," I hold back a gasp and clench my teeth while I move my hips at a steady pace, working my brother into it and feeling how warm his body is against mine. 

Donnie's hands gripped mine in a tight hold as we moved together, fighting for our own dominance and racing for that perfect ending that I wouldn't allow yet but I began to go faster, pulling my hips back again and going in deeper and deeper, aiming to feel him even more and damn, did I. I felt all of him right here, just how I wanted it. 

I finally release Donatello's hands and his arms immediately drop down around my neck, pulling me in for another hard kiss, "M-More! I w-won't break, Leo,"

"Donnie," I gasp thrusting into him and picking up the pacing until I hear my brothers churrs getting louder by the second and I'm going harder now, aiming for our end and I don't stop, "Don, fuck,"

"T-There!" he cries out, and I feel his legs tighten around me as I slam into him, watching his hand drift down towards his leaking erection to touch himself and Donnie throws his head back, allowing his moans to come out in pre-orgasmic outbursts and I follow suit, driving my dick into him at a brutal pace, "Leo, _ah~_ g-gonna mmf!"

My hands were fisting the sheets in tight grips as I watched my brother jerk himself off in between our writhing bodies and I could feel the warm bubble in my groin forming the harder I pounded my brother, "T-Together!" I stammered thickly, grabbing Donnie by his hip and he gasped, calling out my name as rope after rope of cum splatters across his belly.

Right then I shoved my lips against his in one final battle as we both find our release with an intense finish and slowly, we relax against one another, leaving a heaving mess behind us. I peck Donnie's lips a few times, then further down I kiss his shoulder while lying down next to him. We set in silence for the next few minutes, listening to our breathing shallow down until it's just our hearts pounding from the aftermath. 

Donnie's legs tangle with mine and a single smile was sitting on his lips when I looked over at him and then a thought crossed my mind, "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"No, why would you?" he quietly replies with a giggle while resting his head on my chest and I wrap an arm around his shoulders.

"I just worry-- it has been what, a week since you laid the egg?" 

"Two weeks actually," he says, raising up to look at me. 

"How long do we have until it hatches?"

"Well, your birthday is this weekend and by the first week of September it should happen," he smiles at me and I lean up, kissing the middle of his forehead. 

"I'm sorry again for not being there. I know how badly you needed me," 

"Leo, stop," he kisses me once more and I sigh against his lips, "It isn't your fault so stop blaming yourself for so damn much. I'm just happy you're here with me again, the _real_ you,"

I rub the pad of my thumb over my brother's cheek, "I'll try for you, but Raph doesn't make it easy," 

"You should talk to him," Donnie suggests and I can't help but roll my eyes at him, "You know he's too stubborn to admit how much of an a-hole he is,"

"Yeah, and I have to make that long anxious walk downstairs to find him sitting somewhere in the dark, waiting to kill me," I slowly sit up, nuzzling my brother before getting dressed again. 

"He won't kill you," Donnie grins up at me, "Because he knows if he does that then he'll have to deal with me," he winks. 

"I want you to get some rest, understand?"

Donnie tilts his head, "I'd rather have round two if I'm honest, but yes, oh fearless one, I do indeed understand," 

"Don't tempt me," I warn him before giving his head another kiss, "Now clean yourself up and sleep,"

"Yes, Daddy," Donnie agrees and I stop just as I'm reaching for the doorknob, my hand now hovering there from what I just heard and the only thing I can do is release a nervous laugh and leave the room with a mysterious temptation filling my mind. 

I let the silence of the cabin swallow me again as I walk down the staircase and look around for any sign of my brother, but so far, I see or hear nothing so I decide to check the basement and when I'm halfway down there, I see that the light is on. 

I put one foot in front of the other and see that the guy from earlier is still there in the chair and tied up. He hasn't moved once which was a little concerning but I didn't really care. Why should I after what he tried to do? But it wouldn't hurt to take a little peek. 

Standing over him, I check his pulse and it's stable. I then sigh out of relief and take a step back only to bump into something-- or _someone._

I quickly turn, raising my fist at the stranger but as expected my brother is standing there and his fingers are wrapped around my wrist to avoid getting hit in the face. His eyes are dark as they set themselves on me, "What're you doin' down here? Shouldn't you be shackin' up with Donnie?"

After Raph released my hand I couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed because he and the whole house probably heard what I and my mate were up to, but then again I didn't care. It just felt a bit different being confronted in person about it unlike all the other times, "I thought I'd check on him," I motion towards the prick in the corner, "And what me and Donnie do _isn't_ your business,"

"Oh yeah?" he says, moving closer to me but keeping his distance and I sigh heavily from his intense stare. 

"Raphael, can you actually talk to me without having an attitude?" I snap at him, but calmly. 

"Oh don't give me that, Leo!" he moves away from me, "I know I was a little out of line earlier, but nothin' has fuckin' changed with you and it frustrates me,"

"Why do I need to change to make you happy?" I point out, following him in the small space, "What if I said that to you, huh? What if I was like dad and told you that you need to put down your goddamn ego!"

"That's the fuckin' problem, Leo!" my brother accuses while getting right up in my face again, "You are too much like dad! It's okay to follow in ya parents' footsteps and all, but the only thing you do too well is tryin' to run everyone's lives and before you got your fuckin' memory back, you were so different I hardly recognized ya and to be honest, I actually liked it. You were so clueless and quiet and maybe even a little innocent, but most of all, you weren't a dick who tried to battle with me all the time,"

My head was immediately filled with everything before. I remember the conversation that me and Raph had in the car together and how he kissed me. I remember how the kiss made me feel. It was strange at the time and maybe a bit weird, but it made me feel as light as a feather. I've kissed him a million times but that one felt new. It felt refreshing in some sort of way. 

"So, is that what this is about?" I ask him quietly but not moving an inch from where I'm standing, "You want me to be weak, so you can be in control,"

Raph doesn't answer for a good thirty seconds, nor does he look at me, "I think it's better that way,"

I clench my jaw, "My entire life I've had you look down upon me because I was chosen by our father to be the best. I did _not_ choose this life and I most definitely didn't ask to be judged by you. So, you know what, Raphael?" I pause looking up at my brother and his eyes meet mine, "I'm done calling the shots around here, but if you slip up like you did back in New York, I will not hesitate to kick your ass,"

Raph releases a stressed breath of air and lowers his head, "Look, Leo," he begins, setting his sights on the egg not far from the both of us, "You and the rest of this fucked up planet know that I was always the one that wanted the control, the leadership and all that fuckin' glory that you got from Sensei and I didn't. I wanted him to look at me the way he looked at you, the way he'd tell ya good job or don't worry about it after you failed at training-- or maybe I just wish it was me gettin' _you_ outta trouble than you gettin' me out of it,"

"You rebelled against every order I gave you!" I shake my head trying to cool my temper, "Raph, if you wanted those things so much then why the hell did you fight with me so much? Why'd you run off after every session, every argument--"

"I don't know!" he growls, turning towards me, "I just fuckin' did! I wasn't like you, I didn't wanna be like you! I didn't wanna be like any of you. I wanted to be someone that neither of you had seen or thought of. I just wanted to be me, Leo! And if I stuck around as you did, I'd have to put on a fake fuckin' smile and pretend to be the perfectly obedient son every father dreams of,"

"Sensei didn't want you being like me, Raph,"

"Like hell he didn't," he rolls his eyes at me.

"I'm serious. It was mostly me who wanted it," I admitted while watching my brother's face twist with confusion, "We're the oldest of our brother's and when we got old enough to make our own decisions, I always wanted us to be more of a team because it looked better in my head. We were the stronger ones, the ones that would be willing to leap in front of a goddamn bullet if we had to," 

"You always made it seem like it was you and Donnie for life,"

I nodded, "I did because me and him got along better than you and me did. Donnie had the responsibility and when he fought with me, he did it with his heart while yours was just in it for blowing off steam,"

"I don't wanna be a leader, Leo," 

I blink, unable to figure out if what I just heard was what I heard, "What?"

"You want me to show heart or maybe some responsibility-- then fine,"

"But why?"

"Because Leo, we're getting too old for this shit," he laughs, giving me a toothy grin, "We'll fight when we need to, but I don't think we're so irresponsible to the point where we need a leader anymore, and I think you can agree,"

 _I could._ I could one-hundred percent agree. Since I and my brothers hit our twenties, things have gone in four different directions. Mikey being the youngest out of us, he was a little late to the party and is still kind of the same turtle we knew since we were kids. But he has royally matured and that I am happy for. 

"Yeah, I can," I look down for a moment, then back up and over at the guy in the corner, "What're we gonna do with him then?"

Raph shrugs, crossing one arm over the other, "I'd like to have some fun with him, but I don't think you'll allow it,"

"You're right, I won't," I glare at him, "We need to figure out how he found us and how the hell we didn't figure it out sooner that he was following us,"

"I'm just wonderin' when he's gonna wake up. I thought ya killed him after a full hour of him bein' out," 

"I _did_ hit him pretty hard," I shrug my shoulders at my brother and then he walked forward, standing over the complete stranger that I felt like I knew but I _didn't._ Raph took his hand and lightly tapped on the guy's cheek and he still didn't stir and when that hadn't worked he full-on smacked him and my eyes widened,"Easy!"

The man's eyes shot open and when he saw us in front, he immediately squirmed back in his seat, "Oh, shit, it actually fuckin' worked,"

"I thought I killed you freaks!" he thrashed in the chair with dried blood still under his nose. Raph slapped a hand down on his shoulder to keep him from squirming so much. 

"You didn't even get close, bud," my brother remarks and I shake my head. 

"First, I'd like to start with your name, and if you cooperate with us, my very big friend here won't hurt you," I promise him with a slight smirk on my face which mocked my brothers. 

"Do you freaks honestly think I'm intimidated by you? I came here to kill you after all," he spits on the floor just inches from my feet, "So, no, I won't be tellin' you shit,"

Without my say so, I watch as Raph grabs him by the jaw, forcing his head towards the table in the room which was Donnie's workbench, "You see that?" my brother points out, making the guy look at the incubation unit. The guy struggles in my brother's grip but it's impossible to escape it, "Huh? Do you!"

"I-It's a fuckin' egg! What about it, freak!" 

"It isn't just a _fuckin' egg!"_ Raph pops the back of his head and forces his head to cock further back, "That egg contains the most valuable thing in my life, and you walk up in here, aimin' a fuckin' gun at the second most important thing to me, and then you wanna refuse to work with us? Because if I were you, I'd hate to be in your position right about now, so, if you don't wanna get hurt or most importantly-- _if_ you wanna even leave here alive, my brother here asks you a fuckin' question, you're gonna answer it!"

I bite my lip listening to my sibling bash this dude. I didn't particularly agree with Raph's harshness, but he sure was attractive when he was angry. I couldn't just deny that for the rest of my life and when I got my chance, I grabbed him by the back of the neck and pushed my lips against his, not really caring if we were just in the middle of some fucked up interrogation. My brother was obviously taken back from my sudden approach and when he kissed me back, I don't think he cared much either. 

When we finally separated from one another, I was literally out of breath. I didn't know what came over me, but I've missed this and for the past hour, the only thing I've been able to think about is the kiss me and my brother shared in the car that night. I wanted more memories to flood me like that one just did. It was a little wild to just do something and not have a care in the world about who sees or who even dares to judge me or my family. 

I hovered in front of my brother for a minute until I finally continued our little debate with the asshole who tried to kill Donnie. The look on his face was of course, oblivious. He acted as if he didn't really care about what we did, especially in front of him, but regardless, he still hated us.

Raph's arm was around my waist when I opened my mouth again, "Your name?"

The man stubbornly turns his head away from us, "It's Carter," he says, lowering his voice, "Carter Anderson,"

"Anderson?" I repeat the name like I've heard a ghost instead of seeing one. 

"I believe you know my wife," he wiggles in the rope, flashing the golden wedding band on his finger and when I see it, my mind expands as I hear the proud woman I once knew as an enemy announce that she travels to Alaska on occasion to visit her husbands family because she and Lillian were very close, "Her name is Karai,"

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	40. ᴾʳⁱˢᵐ ᴬⁿᵈ ᴾᵘᶻᶻˡᵉˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things tapper off right where it all began and Karai makes an angry visit which leads to a night of unpromising rage.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣˣᴵˣ

ᴾʳⁱˢᵐ ᴬⁿᵈ ᴾᵘᶻᶻˡᵉˢ

**[ Leonardo ]**

_"You what?"_

Donnie's voice carried through the room and I could already hear the frustration in his voice when I told him what happened, "We let him go," I repeat my words, but more calmly this time.

The look on my brother's face was puzzled and mixed with anger, "Don, we had no choice,"

"You had no choice? He tried to kill me, Raph!" he shouts, "He put the life of our child in danger and you let him go!"

"He's Karai's husband, Donatello!" I say aloud, earning a sharp look from him, "I can't risk getting mixed up with that family's bullshit again. Not after Oroku Saki, and you know that,"

"Why is Karai married to an ex-militia?" he simply questions while sitting at the workbench.

"You mean why is she married to someone who used to work for our second biggest enemy?" Raph comments and I elbow him in the ribs and silently tell him that he _isn't_ helping.

"You have her number, Leo, why don't you call her?" Donnie suggests and I remember the phone she had given me when I first got here. I haven't even used it and since then, I kind of forgot about it. 

"What am I meant to tell her?" 

"Tell her that her sack of sh--"

"Donnie!" Raph scolds him, making our brother stop mid-sentence and lower his head.

Cursing wasn't really in Donnie's dictionary and usually, when he does, he regrets it seconds later. But I couldn't really blame him. We all have an equal love-hate-relationship with a poor choice of words and irresponsible thoughts around here. I never really had a dirty mouth until Raph hit puberty. 

Later, when I was digging through my bedside drawer, Raph was watching every move I made and it was kind of nice. He wasn't being weird about it, but not fighting with him was the one thing I truly enjoyed and the feeling it gave me was the only thing strange about it. Once again, I was on cloud nine and feeling weightless. I love Donnie more than anyone or anything but the way Raph made me feel let alone angry majority of the time, I didn't really wanna be away from him and I think he felt it too. 

"Did ya find it?" he asked me leaning on the doorway and I shook my head, becoming a bit frustrated, knowing that I put it in there but it wasn't here. 

"No," I huffed, "Dammit, I know it was here. How could it have just been here one minute and gone the next?"

"Hmph, I think I know," Raph said, walking away and I followed shortly after I looked one more time and still had no luck in finding the cellphone Karai had given me. 

Raph and I end up in the living room where Mikey, Cayden, and shockingly Lillian were sitting with Codey. He was sat up in the middle of the room, playing with some toys and crawling around in his hands and knees, which I have never seen before. 

"Oh, hey guys!" Mikey greeted us, but Raph wasn't really having it and our little brother frowned, "What'd I do now?"

"Where is it, Mike?" 

"Where's what?" he cluelessly questions, but shame clear on his face. 

From the corner of my eye, I catch Lillian staring at me and for a moment I give her a slight smile and I nod my head at her as she lets Codey crawl up into her lap. 

"C'mon Mikey, we don't have time to be fuckin' around, where's the damn phone!"

He sighs heavily, "Why do you guys need it so suddenly?" 

"We let that guy go, and he told us some pretty distressing information," I tell him before Raph can be anymore harsher. 

_"You let him go?"_ Cade's voice was quiet coming across the room, but it was filled with shock and maybe a little concern. 

"We had to," Raph glares at him, keeping his guard. 

"What do you mean you had to, that's crazy-- he tried to kill Donnie!" Mikey was on his feet now, clenching his much smaller fists. 

"He's Karai's husband, Michelangelo," I finally say and the entire room falls quiet. 

Lillian springs into action when she hears what came out of my mouth. She wraps an arm around our nephew and brings him close to her chest, "Carter was the man who was here?"

I peered at her soft features as she looks at Cayden with worry and he grabs her hand, "Yes, he practically killed Donatello-- but, something kind of happened," 

"He totally didn't travel back in time or anything" Mikey winks at me and I smirk at him. 

"Who cares, we need that phone, Mike! Now, where is it!" 

"Stop yelling!" I scold my older brother, "It won't help none. I need to call Karai and let her know that her husband was here and that he had a plan to kill one of us. Or better yet, all of us for that matter,"

"This is really bad," Lillian says, looking off to the side before passing Codey over to Cade, "Carter hasn't been back in at least four or five years. He never really got along with our brother James or even our father, so when he left, the only time we saw him again was at the wedding"

"Does he have issues like James does?" I couldn't help but ask, considering who he was related to, "Like, psychological?"

"They were born twins, so most likely. But ever since he moved away, we don't really know much about him or what he's into. The last thing we found out was that he had joined some sort of cult. He always would talk about going into the military, but we didn't think he'd actually do it. Especially after mama died," Lillian admits, but her voice softening into a much more hushed tone. The deep frown on her face was obvious that the subject of her family was saddening for her.

Mikey walks up to me with a frown also on his face as well and in his hand, he holds out is the phone, "I didn't think you'd need it so soon so I took it while you were sleeping"

"I would ask why but I think I understand without you actually telling me," I smile at him while ignoring the simple glare from Raph and I take the phone from my little brother, "Thank you," 

He nods at me and turns to go back over to Codey who looks just as excited as Mikey does to see him again even if it had been for only ten seconds. I look at both Cayden and Lillian and notice almost immediately how much they love one another just by the way they hold hands and for once, I understand why Cayden did what he did. I'd of probably did the same if I was in his historical position. 

"I'm gonna go make that call," I say just as I leave the room but before I'm able to, Raph snatches me by the arm. 

"Wait, did you hear that?" he asks and I peer up at him with a scowl on my face. 

"Hear what?" 

Mikey stands again, tilting his head towards the front door and as if on que there's a knock and a rather loud one too. Cayden is the first one to move towards the pounding noises and when he opens the door, Karai bursts through, fuming. 

"Where is he?" she shouts, coming straight into the living room and for me but before she can get any closer, Raph steps in between us, blocking her. 

"I don't think so," he snaps cooly and the look on her face drains amongst the five of us including my nephew. 

I move my brother aside, "If you're talking about Carter, he just left,"

"Just left?" she smugly mocks, "He told me that the four of you beat and tortured him and then you let him go out of pity!"

Raph releases a laugh that is unheard of, "Oh, believe me, lady-- if I wanted to beat on your husband, I would have already. He tried to kill Don,"

"He also murdered our father," Mikey chimed in, reminding me of all the blood on my hands when I was there with Sensei in his final moments. 

Karai looked at all of us like we were crazy and in some parts, maybe we were, but this wasn't the case, "You can't be serious, I just saw him! I saw the wounds, the bruises!" 

Right then, Donnie enters the room with worry immediately covering his face, "What's going on now?" he questions, coming to stand next to me.

"Karai, I admit that I hit him a few times but that was because he had a gun. He tried to kill Donnie. I even saw him do it," I tell her but her face is all but a mystery but then she looks up at me, pressing her coral-colored lips into a hard line. 

"Felix wanted to see you again," she says clearing her throat of frustration as if her mood had changed completely, "He said that he needed to talk to you about something important,"

"What the hell does this have to do with your bitch of a husband?" Raph says all sarcastically but I ignore him for the time being and give her the benefit of the doubt and nod at her. 

"How urgent is it?" 

"Well, he couldn't tell me what it was so that means it's pretty serious and this would give me a chance to speak with you alone if you or your brothers wouldn't mind," she says looking around at all of us and appearing to be nervous.

"Karai, I don't remember Daddy needing to speak with Leo?" Lillian says, catching my attention but Karai turns and gives her sister-in-law a quick agreement. 

"He knew I was on my way over here since I was back at the farmhouse and he told me before I came to let Leo know about it or else he would have probably told you about it, but I know that you've been wanting to keep your relationship quiet while around your father," she tells Lillian who also agrees and goes back to tending to the baby.

"Leo, I really don't think now is a good time for you to be leaving again," Donnie whispers into my ear and I grab his hand. 

"It might be the only way I'll be able to get some answers about Carter. I won't be gone long I promise you," I give him a quick kiss and look back at Karai who was waiting patiently for my response, "Look, I'll go back with you, but only if you'll answer some questions for me,"

"Oh, of course, I guess I should have expected that but we should get going before it gets too late," she says, turning on her heel as her shoes click loudly on the hardwood floor.

The look Raph gives me is just another unforgettable reminder that I should have just stayed here with the people I knew and trusted but I couldn't just let the thoughts of my father get past me another second. I kept seeing his face frozen in time with blood matted in his fur and just knowing that his killer was in front of me for the second time, it made me feel like I had a second chance at avenging him. 

In the car with Karai at the wheel, she drives silently with unspoken words I'm sure she's dying to ask me so I decide to pick up the pace and open my mouth first. 

"Did you know?" 

The small space between us continued to fill with silence but finally, she sighs, "Know what?"

"You knowwhat, Karai. Now isn't really the time to be playing dumb. Not with me. Especially with _me,_ "

Seconds go by without another answer and I notice her manicured fingers are gripping the steering wheel by the time she opens her mouth again, "Yes and no," she releases another sigh, "I didn't know the entire time if that's what you think, but you must understand that for a while I was entitled to keeping things quiet because of how dangerous Carter had gotten over the past year. When he killed your father while working for Bishop, he didn't exactly get let off as easy as you think," 

"I know exactly how easy he was let off,"

"No, you don't, Leonardo!" she objects. 

"Yes, I fucking do!" I yell slamming my fist down on the center console, "I could have killed that son of a bitch! Bishop brought him to me and gave me a chance to end it once and for all and I chose to not to, wanna know why? Because I didn't wanna be a murderer like he was!"

"And I appreciate that, okay?" she looks over at me for only a second then putting her eyes back on the road, "But still. Somewhere inside, I wanted to come to talk to you about it. I knew that it would be rough for the four of you and the moment I found out I had you in my thoughts after everything that had happened,"

"You should have. But you didn't. I had to see you getting tied up by my brother for us to ever speak again," I roll my eyes at the memory but quickly swipe it from my mind as I stare out the window at the blizzard falling from the sky. 

"I'd rather not think about that again if you don't mind? I let that go awhile ago. Especially after seeing Michelangelo die and then seeing him again all well and healthy," 

"Uh, well, miracles _do_ happen. Fortunately, our friend Cade helped us with him and we nursed him back to full health in a matter of weeks," I say rubbing the back of my neck and thinking about all the impossibilities of how Mikey ended up being alive after what she had seen. 

Just then, the car comes to a stop and I realize that we've arrived at the house I'd of never wanted to return to if I had a choice but Felix was always a good man. He was understanding to a point. Especially when he started speaking about the facts of science and the medical field he had worked in when he was in the war. Those things were pretty interesting until he wanted my blood and I hoped in the back of my mind that whatever he wanted from me, that it wasn't that. 

"Excuse the mess, I haven't really had the chance to clean up since this morning and when the family is all here, it can be a real pain to keep things in line," she smiles up at me after closing the door. 

I look around, not really minding messy considering who I lived with for the last fifteen years or so, "Why did you really bring me here?" I ask her. 

"I already told--"

"There's no one here," I remind her while walking around and admiring the apparent _mess._

"Well," she pauses. 

"You're bad at lying Karai. There isn't even a mess here that two people could make and most importantly-- it's far too quiet and when we drove up, all the lights were off," I slowly turn, eyeing her down but keeping my distance. The shame on her face is clear but I had a feeling she didn't really expect me to buy into this whole lie. 

She put her hands together and made her way towards me, "I am sorry for lying to you, Leonardo, but since this whole thing with Carter happened, I have a bit of a confession to make and I feel as if you're the only person I could talk to after my father had finally passed," 

"Fine then, talk away-- even though you didn't need to lie about it or take me halfway across town just to talk," I shrug crossing my arms over my chest.

"I wanted this to be private. I wanted our talk to be guaranteed that we'd have no interruptions and now, I can finally say it. I can finally say that because of you and your brother's I can leave Carter without fearing him and what he'll do to me if I try to,"

"Where is he now?" 

"That's the thing-- I'm not exactly sure. Before I drove over to your cabin, he said he was going to the local bar in town. It's one of his old stomping grounds for drinking and having a _good time_ as he called it. I didn't tell him where I was going but I wanted you to come back with me in case he does too because I wanted to tell him the truth," she confesses with truth in her eyes but I remained skeptical of the situation considering she had already lied once. 

"Has he ever threatened to kill you before?"

"Yes," Karai answers quickly while looking down, "He used to be such a sweet man before what happened at his job. From what I heard he was beaten for an entire week before he returned to me and by then I was already in New York making other plans for a new career and then I came here to talk to Lillian about the nursing school she went to,"

"He beat you?" 

I was probably out of line for asking such questions. But I had to know. This was a woman of many years I had known and fought on and off all the time when I was much younger than I am now and she was a totally different person who still knew how to use a blade. At the same time, I felt a little uncomfortable talking to her about her issues, and then again, I felt like I was talking to April again like old times. But I knew it wasn't her. _It wasn't my April._

"On and off," she admits with small tears pooling her eyes and I had to look away, "He changed me so much, Leo and now-- it's like I can't seem to find myself again. My old self which allows me to protect myself," 

"I won't let him hurt you again, okay?" I promised her while placing a hand on her much smaller shoulder and she nodded at me while suddenly reaching up and wrapping her arms around my neck and bringing me into a tight hug that I honestly wasn't expecting for a woman of her size.

"You have no idea how much this means to me," she sobs, catching me completely off guard and when she pulls back she notices the look on my face and laughs shamefully and on the surface of her cheeks I see a shade of pink, "I-I'm so sorry, I just really needed that,"

"It's alright, I uh, I understand," I nod my head in agreement when our eyes meet and silence fills the space between us again and the air is suddenly a little thick from the way she's staring up at me. Her eyes were a lot like Donnie's in a way with all the brown swirls and as I noticed this, her head was moving closer to mine and I couldn't tell if this was actually happening or not and before I could stop her, Karai's lips were on mine and I was too curious to pull away.

I didn't move for the next few seconds but my hands found their way to her hips that pulled themselves close to my pelvis and when I finally decided to kiss back, my heart was in my throat and I couldn't believe what was happening right at this moment. It felt different and odd but strangely welcoming to me. My fingers dug into the curve of Karai's hips and her lips were soft on mine, moving in locked sync with such a delicate touch when our tongues collide. 

_Fuck, what am I doing?_

My mind was running wild and then I see Donnie's face right before my eyes and I yank myself away from the woman in front of me and I nearly trip over the coffee table but I keep my balance, "I-I um," I trail off speaking rather quick, "We shouldn't be doing this,"

"Why not?" Karai questions coming after me, holding her hands out, "Leo, it felt so right, please!"

"I don't think--" I say shaking my head for the millionth time as Karai presses the palms of her hands against my plastron and shoves me down on the couch while crawling over my lap and sitting down, "Karai, please-- I really don't think we should be doing this, I-I'm in a committed relationship," 

"That relationship with your brothers isn't real, Leo," she whispers, sounding lustfully turned on, "You've never had a real woman before and I can be that for you,"

Her hands were traveling lower and tugging at the strings on my pants and I couldn't deny the fact that I was getting hard which was unavoidable. Karai was practically throwing herself at me and there was a deeply sick part of me that was really enjoying it. 

"Leo, please, don't make me beg!" she pleads, opening her shirt and I'm surprised to see her bare chest in front of me. 

My head was starting to feel a little dizzy when Karai's lips found their way to my neck and my hands were back on her hips. Her breasts were against my chest and again, I couldn't believe this was happening to me. I had seen a woman's body before. Especially in movies and maybe a few adult videos but I didn't really think much of it. My mind was too focused on other things and now, I didn't really know what to do except follow my hormonal instinct. 

My fingers were traveling all over her body and touching every inch I could get my hands on and the noises leaving her lips were of something very new to me. It made me feel a little silly but then again, I held my confidence straight and plunged my fingers into the hem of her pants and tugged them down over her plump behind. She moaned into my mouth when my hands were back on her skin, touching, feeling, and gripping her tighter than anyone ever could and molding into her body. 

Everything was moving very fast and I couldn't stop Karai from touching me in ways I didn't expect to feel so nice. Her hand was around my member, fisting it gently and moving in all the right places. God, everything she did was gentle. I was so used to the rough patch in my life that I had totally forgotten what taking things slow actually meant. 

"Karai," I pant, tensing up at her touch again as she's full-on straddling me now and I could see between her legs and how her fingers were curling around my dick, still stroking it, "A-Are you sure you want this? Y-You're married for god sakes!"

"It's over between us," she quickly admits before lowering her hips on me, allowing our bodies to mold together once again and I'm inside of her, filling her deep. It was so warm around me and the moment I started thrusting into her snatch, more and more noises left her mouth. She would whine and tell me how good it feels, how big it felt swelling inside of her wet heat. It was better than I had ever imagined and I couldn't stop myself. 

_It was so wrong. Deathly wrong but my sick thoughts were no match for my self-control._

I couldn't wrap my finger around why I was allowing this to happen. Her of all people. My nemesis' daughter. It was horribly disgusting of me and completely dishonorable towards my mates at home but I couldn't help it. Not now at least. 

"L-Leo!" her fingers dug into my shoulders as I pounded her as deep as I could, "I'm gonna!-- _ah!"_

Her moans were sweet and tender to my ears, but I couldn't stop myself from picturing them as someone else's noises, and I couldn't stop myself from picturing someone else being fucked against this wall with their legs spread wide, showing me everything they have and close to cumming for me. 

_Raph._

I bit the edge of my lip, seeing his face in my mind and how he would come undone beneath me as I buried myself into him. It'd be a fight that's for sure, but now, it's the only thing allowing me to race to the finish line while I'm nailing the first woman I've ever been with. 

**Later,** and by later, I mean much later, the clock had to of been wrong the last time I looked at it. It was around two in the morning by the time I got a good look at it, but my vision was all but blurry from how tired I had been after everything that had happened. I couldn't really keep up with how many times I did it with Karai and how many hours I had her crying out for me. It left a nasty taste in my mouth when I really thought about it and when I woke up in an unfamiliar bed, I snapped back into reality and I felt strange. 

Karai was next to me when I got up and the only thing covering her nude body was the crisp white sheets that were in a rather messy order once we were finished doing what we were doing.

Looking around the dark but dimly lit room to find my clothes, I see something glowing inside the closet. It wasn't a bright glow, but it was bright enough to catch my attention. I gave the sleeping woman a quick glance before walking in and sure enough, she was still pretty out of it. 

On the table in the middle of the overly sized wardrobe, I saw a briefcase that looked conveniently placed as if someone wanted it to be found. It was open and the closer I moved towards it, the more familiar it looked. Inside the case were three syringes that were filled with a neon greenish yellowish fluid and on the sides it read, _TCRI._

In the case, I also saw that there originally was supposed to be four syringes instead of three. One of them was missing and as I noticed this, I heard movement from the bedroom and I quickly turned around, seeing that Karai was standing there with the fourth needle in her hand and it was already being stabbed into my arm, being drained of its ooze. 

"I'm sorry, Leo," I heard her mumble as I fell to my knees, my vision getting blurry again. My veins were lighting up like firecrackers and my skin was crawling like bugs were under there gnawing at my flesh, "But this was the only way," 

She dropped the empty needle on the carpet in front of me and I was on my hands and knees, crawling after her in agony, "The fuck did you do to me!" I shout, my voice sounding hoarse and a lot deeper than usual. I could see the muscles in my arms growing right before my eyes and I released an animalistic growl that made Karai jump with a squeak and stumble back as I continued to crawl towards her. 

I clamped my hand around the empty syringe and crushed it with a loud crack as I finally was able to stand. I felt energetic and angry. Far too angry. But good, it felt really good to be fucking angry. The rips in my pants stood out to me as I rose to my feet.

"Leo, please, it was the only way!"

"Shut up!" I told her, my voice booming in my own head, "Shut the fuck up, you used me!"

"N-No, that wasn't it!" she quickly denies, holding her hands up and backing up so far that she is up against the only window in the room, "I swear on my father's grave, Leo, please, just let me--"

"Enough talking!" I scream, rattling her brain as I grab her by the throat, "You're nothing but a fucking liar, you used me and I will not be anyone's goddamn guinea pig!" 

"L-Leo!" she chokes out as both my hands wrap around her neck and I'm lifting her into the air, making her gasp for dear life and it feels so good, so nice. 

I wanted to make sure that the last thing she sees is my face, my eyes, and how tired I am of being treated like an animal who is too dumb to know anything at all. I wanted her to feel the despair and rot of when her husband killed my father and when her father broke my family down piece by piece and destroyed home after home causing us to only drag by as the months wasted away, again and again. 

Karia's face was starting to turn a little blue and her eyes were bulging out the tighter I squeezed and then suddenly, her neck snapped between my hands and she fell limp, leaving scratches and imprints from her nails.

I threw her body down on the floor with a loud thud and breathed in the stench of the dead bitches perfume. I glanced down at her for only a moment and then from the living room, I heard the door slam and figured that maybe Felix had finally come home or maybe Lillian. 

"Karai, the fuck are ya, I'm finally back!" Carter calls from downstairs and a smirk slowly spreads across my face. 

"This one is for you dad," I look up, grinning from ear to ear and I slowly walk out of the room, leaving a _real_ mess in my wake. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, Hello! I am back for yet another cliffhanger!
> 
> In this one, I was exploring different types of things I've never actually done before and it was really nice to dive deep into a mystery pool for once. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing it because Chapter Forty won't only be extra as shit, it will also be action-packed with some possible Power-Bottom-Raph type stuff. Maybe, I'm not so sure yet but get ready! 
> 
> We're nearly at the end of another journey and I can't wait to start journey No.3! 
> 
> Cowabunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	41. ᴾⁱˡˡˢ ᴺ' ᴾᵒᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The unexpected of the expected continue off on this juicy thrill ride, as Raph and Lillian decide to catch up with an emotional talk along with a jealous Michelangelo and then a surprise that surely changed the opinion on Raph's thoughts forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my TMNT lovers, I am back again and ready to show you the new masterpiece (if you wanna call it that) I have finished for you all and I'm pretty proud of this one! 
> 
> I got done with it at approximately seventy-six-hundred characters and that's a lot for me. That's beyond a lot for me. My limit usually goes at twenty-five-hundred or at least four-thousand but this one truly was special because I don't typically cram this much into one chapter, I love splitting it up and leaving everyone on cliff-hangers.
> 
> (Sorry, not sorry)
> 
> I even took my time with this one and thoroughly looked over it to try my hardest that no mistakes were made as this is a very long chapter but I'm pretty positive that I will miss some, we all do. A lot of people who read my content love long ones and I am also one of those people who love it when Authors do that but I won't keep you any longer, I hope you enjoy this very complicated next beginning and maybe, just maybe you'll come back for it again. (insert-winky-face-here).
> 
> But before I go, I must warn those who have triggering issues that deal with things like, manipulation, forceful actions, or maybe blood? But yes, I love you guys, thank you so much for nearly three-thousand hits as this one truly IS a hit! 
> 
> Cowabunga! 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸ

ᴾⁱˡˡˢ ᴺ' ᴾᵒᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ

**[ Raphael ]**

"It was nice of Cayden to show your brother's around town a little more," Lillian says as she pours sugar in her steaming cup of tea. 

I was all alone in this house with her and it honestly felt a little uncomfortable. I didn't really know the woman and on top of that, she's related to some very bad people that I wanted to kill.

_That's a bit harsh, dick._

I rolled my eyes at my thoughts, "Yeah. Hopefully, they aren't stupid enough to get seen by someone,"

"I'm sure Cayden will make sure they are discreet," she smiles up at me, her light green eyes shining from the kitchen lighting. 

"Oh, I'm so sure that jerk off can hide my giant ass brother's amongst the public," I grin, imagining such a scene in my head until I see the look on Lillian's face and my smile drops, "Eh, sorry-- I'm not really used to uh, bein' around actual people,"

"I wouldn't consider myself a people's person, Raphael," she sips on her tea, gleaming up at me from across the counter island, "I may look like one of those people to you but I assure you that I haven't lost my sense of humor,"

I glance at the clock, seeing that it's nearly noon and Leo still hasn't come back. I felt that maybe he and the rest of the trio ran into one another and are just out there together but I also had a doubt in it. There was no way the damned situation would be that convenient. 

"Are you alright?" Lillian questions, interrupting my thoughts.

_Damn, she's really chatty._

I turned away from the window seeing that her eyes were on me again, "Yeah, uh, I'm just thinkin' about some stuff," 

"Wanna talk about it?" she smiles up at me for the millionth fuckin' time. 

The deep dimples in her cheeks were actually pretty cute for a girl as tiny as she was but I knew who I had eyes for, "Talk about it? Like," I laughed, trailing off on my words, "Talk about my problems or something?"

"Yes, I take it you've never had anyone ask you such a question," she giggles at my reaction. 

"Well, it isn't that. I've just never had anyone care about my problems, period," I shrug my shoulders, "Sorry,"

"You live in such a populated family, did you not have anyone there for you growing up?" 

"Well, I was surrounded by a bunch of immature knuckleheads most my life and then there was my father-- he always tried ta get me to talk about things but I just couldn't around times like that. We counted on keeping the city safe up until a point and that was really the end of therapy talk if ya know what I mean," 

"I get it," she nods, placing the mug in her hands back on the countertop. 

"I don't think ya do," I tell her while leaning down on my elbows, earning a small but soft glare from the woman. 

The look she gave me soon disappears when her long lashes flutter as she peers down into her half-empty cup, "I'm the youngest of my four siblings and it hasn't exactly been a cakewalk,"

"Four?" I asked, "Donatello showed us the files on your family and it didn't tell us anything about a fourth brother or sister," 

"That's because they passed away about eight years ago," she announces, keeping her voice low and my expression I'm sure changed once the words left her mouth. 

"Oh," I look down, sliding my fingers through one another, "I'm sorry to uh, hear that. I'm sure she was a good person," 

"He," she corrects me with a gentle smile, "I don't think about it often because my father, Felix has always had a hard time about it. He blames himself because the explosion was in his office," 

I stare into Lillian's eyes, finding myself really moved by her story. I didn't really expect myself to be in this position today. I've never had a single conversation with someone without bein' mad or havin' an argument. Everything was either yelling or someone or something scolding me for a thing I did that they didn't approve of. 

"Leo said he was a doctor?" 

"He worked as a medic in the war for a long time but he was never certified for it so he turned to science before he and my mother decided to have kids. In our old house, before we moved here, he had set up shop in the basement and one day, he decided to ask Keith for help. He was only twenty at the time and I guess he did something wrong down there," Lillian looked away from my stare and in the corners of her eyes I saw tears, "I'm sorry," she sniffles, "Forgive me," 

_She's apologizing for crying?_

"Don't ever feel like ya have to say you're sorry for doin' that," 

"We were meant to be talking about you," she muses, reaching across the counter and touching my hand, and the moment she touches me, she flinches and steps back.

I stand up, straightening my spine, "Are you alright?" 

"I-I," she pauses, looking nervous, "I just wasn't expecting it to feel that way,"

I tilt my head at her, "What?"

"You," she stammers at me, taking another step back. 

"Me?" I laugh again but this time with full-on amusement, "Don't tell me you're afraid?"

Her eyes are moving rapidly as I move around the counter, knowing I'll have a little fun with this, "Afraid? No, heavens no, I was just a little surprised is all," 

I get closer to Lillian and grin down at her, "I'm just as human as you," I tell her while stretching my hands out, but being cautious for her. She looks at my hands, probably admiring every disgusting feature I have but still, I didn't need her being afraid of me, let alone my brothers. 

"Can I?" she hesitates, stretching out her fingers towards mine and I nod at her, keeping the grin on my face as her cheeks turn red. Lillian's lightly tanned features were fuming at the surface and it was actually pretty amusing. 

Lillian's fingers skim over the rough patches of my skin and she seems so excited and curious because of the way I feel. Her hands travel flatly up my forearms, "You have the same tattoos as Leo," she points out, still touching me and completely lost in it. 

"We all have them except for Donnie," I smile at her and she peers up at me again, moving her hands further up, touching my biceps and shoulders. 

I hadn't realized how close she had gotten until I really looked and by the time I did, someone cleared their throat. I immediately backed away from Lillian and in the doorway, I saw Mikey standing there with a smirk clear on his face. 

"Mike," I exhaled. 

Lillian smiles at my brother, "Hello, Michelangelo. Where's Cayden?" 

"Oh, he and Donnie are bringing in the groceries. He plans to make one of his best dishes tonight," Mikey says cheerfully without taking his eyes off of me, "They could uh, really use some help out there," 

"Alright," Lillian puts her empty mug in the sink and looks up at me, saying "I'll talk to you later, Raphael," with a final glance, she touches my hand again and leaves the room. 

Mikey squints at me from across the room, "Don't start with me," I tell him before going towards the basement but once I get to the bottom of the stairs he appears in front of me, fingers crawling up my chest. 

"I'm totally going to start with you," he grins smacking my plastron, "Lillian was _so_ flirting with you dude!" 

"No, she wasn't, Mikey!" I disagree, denying the obvious because I truly didn't wanna make a big deal out of it and risk Cade findin' out.

"Then why was she about to kiss you?" he snubs at me, standing near on his tiptoes. 

"Kiss me? She wasn't about to-- she was just touchin' my hands because she was afraid of me!"

"Oh yeah?" he raises a hairless brow at me and connects our lips after pushing me against the wall, "I guess that means I'm afraid of you, huh?" 

"Mike," I try to say before he kisses me again and I sigh through my nose touching his hips. 

"I missed you while I was out, this town is so small and boring-- and too white, because you know, the fucking snow!" he rolls his eyes at his lame joke and drags his tongue down my jaw and over my neck, "You make everything so much more entertaining for me, Raphie," 

"Yeah?" I mindlessly say, already feeling the heat coursing through my body. 

_Dammit, Mikey._

My brother fiddles with the buttons on my pants and shoves his hand in, wrapping itself around my dick, "But if that bitch ever touches you again, we're gonna have bigger problems than my toy here," he says inches from my lips and I feel his fingers tighten around me and I gasp. 

"Fuck, Mike," 

His dirty mouth always gave me that push I needed in moments like these and I loved it every single time. Calling Lillian such a name was a bit of a shock but shit, I didn't think I cared. 

I thrust myself into Mikey's hand and groan at the delicate touch he's givin' me, but I needed more. Much fuckin' more and once that opportunity came, I pressed my lips tight against my brother's and stuck my tongue straight down his throat, earning a lewd moan from him and suddenly, the phone in my pocket started vibrating. 

"Ignore it," Mikey says quickly but I can't shake that maybe it's Leo callin' me. 

I pulled my phone out as my little brother bit into my neck and the name on the phone flashed **Unknown** and I was immediately confused, "What?" I growled into the phone as Mikey whined against me.

"Hey, Raph," 

I furrowed at the voice, but it sounded all too familiar, "Leo?" Mikey backed up and huffed loudly at me, frustrated but I ignored him, "Where the hell are ya?"

"I'm uh, out of town at the warehouse we talked about not too long ago," he finally answers, sounding a little off. 

"Warehouse? The fuck are ya talkin' about?"

"I'll text you the address, but come alone would ya? I have quite the surprise for you, Raphie-Boy" he says, amusement clear in his dark tone as the phone goes dead and I look at my phone with confusion again.

Mikey sighs again and crosses his arms at me as I button up my pants again, "I have to go, apparently,"

"Can I come?"

"No, Leo wants me to meet him, he's found somethin' or did something-- who the fuck knows, but I'll be back," I tell him before leaving, and this time I don't bother takin' Cayden's car. 

During the travel, Leo keeps to his word and gives me the address of some far away fuckin' place on the outskirts of Homer. When I arrived, the snow had finally let up and in the nook of a dusty forest, I saw the warehouse. It looked really run down and the windows were busted out and from here, I could smell a faint scent of blood and a little bit of somethin' else. 

_Leo didn't sound hurt on the phone so, why should I be worried about a smell?_

As I got closer, I had to remind myself that it was way too quiet for an abandoned workstation and of all places, why here? Why a warehouse and why the fuck was Leo here in the first place?

I kept my hand close at my hip where my sai was easily in reach and when I opened the sliding door, it creaked so loudly my ears burned. Since the windows were all busted and broken, glass was scattered across the concrete and many rays of light were peaking through the tattered ceiling. 

I slowly crept along the darkest part of the walls, which wasn't much considering it was in the middle of the day. I debated whether to call Leo again or maybe yell out for him but I still didn't trust this place. I couldn't after everything-- after every fight and all the bloodshed. For once I didn't need to be stupid.

"No need to sneak, dear brother," 

I look around, keeping my weapon in reach, "Come on, Leo, stop playin' games, now why'd ya bring me all the way over here?" 

From the railing high up, someone is thrown down with a loud thud and the only thing filling my ears was their scrambled screams that were being muffled by a gag in his mouth. I immediately knew who it was and he looked so badly beaten I didn't think he could still move. 

"Carter here was just dying to see you again, Raph, and so was I," 

Another loud thud came crashing down from above and just behind Carter's squirming body was someone new, someone, who was familiar but different. Way fuckin' different. His grinning face was the only thing that helped me recognize him. My brother mirrored me in ways I thought couldn't be possible and when I took another step out into the light his smirk only grew, showing his rather sharp teeth. 

"Leo?" 

"Correct," he chuckles deep, bending down to the bloodied man on the floor, "You hear that, bud? My brother here is happy to see you!" 

He was large. Very large and for once, I knew what Lillian could have possibly been afraid of. Not only, by the way, I felt to her touch but the way I looked in general. Leo had completely changed in height, weight, and all-around features but something about him still looked the same. His eyes were still that blue I loved so much but they were brighter and deeper in color. 

"You looked stunned, Raphael," Leo says, sounding hurt as he subconsciously steps over Carter's body who turns his head to look over at me, "Do I look different? Is it scary?" he smirks again.

The stench of blood mixed with something completely sharp was beginning to get stifling for me, "Y-Yeah, ya look real different, Leo, what the fuck happened?" 

"Why one of the greatest things that could ever happen!" he cackles again and this time my hand wraps around the handle of my sai, pulling it out. 

Leo notices this and tilts his head at me, "Oh come on, you think I'd hurt you?" 

"I don't really know, ya look like a fuckin' monster!"

Leo steps back, picking up a shard of glass from the ground and yanks Carter from the floor by the back of his shirt collar, "The only one I'm here to hurt is _him,"_ my brother says, his voice sounding deeper and monotone. 

"It looks like you've already hurt him enough!" I fluttered my eyes shut than open, trying to avoid the strong scent, "Come on, Leo, put him down,"

Leo was looking offended again, "Put him down? You, Raphael, want me to put down our father's murderer? He's already tried to say he's sorry and make it up to me. Fuck, the next thing he can do is get down on both knees and suck me dry for an apology!" 

My brother's words came as a complete shock to me. This whole fuckin' thing was a shock. 

"Leo, please," I beg him, unable to believe that I'm saying this. I was on the other side of things for once and now, I knew exactly how my brother felt to deal with an asshole like me, "Put him down! Don't make me do this,"

"Do what?" Leo grins again, positioning the piece of glass just beneath Carter's chin and right against the skin of his throat. 

My head felt like it was going to start spinning if I kept this up, "I don't wanna have to fight you over that piece of shit, now please, put him down!" I warned a final time, my voice echoing all over this place. 

"Fight me?" Leo brought Carter closer, his squirming body coming to a complete stop as he yelled behind the gag for help. God, this was sick. My brother lowered his eyes at me from across the room and his stare was devilish, "I'd like to see you try," 

My eyes widened at the dare and seconds after the words spilled from his mouth, my brother slit the throat of the man in his grip, "No!" I screamed after him as I launched myself in a full-on sprint. By the time I flew into Leo, the blood spilling from Carter's jugular stopped me dead in my tracks. My blade was inches from Leo's face and his arm and mine were connected in a tight tug war. My eyes focused in on the smell, the aroma in front of me and I couldn't help but zone out everything that was happening at this very moment. 

"You smell that, Raphie?" Leo leans in, whispering to me, "You said I was a monster, eh? At least this stuff doesn't drive me completely crazy!"

I inhaled the taste and it wasn't even in my mouth yet, "Leo!" 

"Come on, Raph," his amusement was clear again, "You can't possibly think I brought you here to watch me kill this man. I only wanted to do half the work, my dear brother. Now it's time you have a taste!" 

Leo shoved Carter's body forward and he squirmed and twitched from the final moments of his life. His blood spilled onto my hands and I tried to push him away or at least I think I did and before I could stop myself, my teeth were out and sinking themselves into the deadman's flesh. His blood filled my mouth and the heavy relief lifted from my shoulders. All the pain and suffering from trying to avoid this very thing disappeared after every drink. 

Carter finally fell into my grip and he stopped squirming and mumbling some unknown screams into his gag and once I was done, I dropped his body to the hard floor and he lied there, allowing the final contents of his blood to drip out onto the floor. 

It was unbelievably satisfying to see it, feel it, and most importantly, taste it. 

I licked my lips and looked at my brother who was staring at me with that same shit-eating grin I couldn't wipe from my mind, "You planned this!" I angrily accused and he nodded at me, admiring my work. 

"There's one left, you know?" 

I shove him, "One left of what you fuckin' moron!" 

Leo shoves me back and I actually stumble, "The family, Raphael! I plan to wipe out every fucker in this bastards tree!"

"What the hell do you mean, you can't do that!"

"The hell I can't! That bitch Lillian is next!"

"You know you can't do that, Cayden will kill you if you ever try to lay a finger on her! And ya still haven't told me what happened!" I shout in his face and he scowls at me but I don't back down.

"Karai is dead," he spits.

My face twists at what I had just heard, "What?"

"I killed her. How else? After we fucked," he smiles over at me and I take a step back, gripping my sai again. 

"Who the fuck are you?" was the only thing I could say to him and this time he too was shocked. 

"Come on, Raph, I thought you loved this kind of stuff! Plus, look at everything her and her fucking dad put us through, she kind of deserved it," he stretched his arms out, turning around in the large space, "The serum that Karai shot me up with has really done a number on me and I feel better than ever and maybe, only maybe, dear brother, we can give you some too,"

"Serum?" I shake my head, drawing my weapon back, preparing myself, "What kind of fuckin' serum?"

"Well," Leo sings, tilting his head at me and slowly he begins to walk forward again and I start to back up, "Look at me, Raph, I'm bigger, stronger and I bet I could beat you at anything-- wanna go for an old fashioned brawl?"

"No, no I fuckin' don't! We need to get ya some help or something!" I tell him, continuing to walk backward, minding my steps, "I'll take you to Donnie and he'll check ya out and you'll be back to normal,"

"Fine, fine," he dramatically waved his arms in the air as an effort of defeat, "On one condition,"

"Leo, enough of this shit! I'm not going to fight you!"

My brother smirks again and swings at me knowing I'll dodge it and he does it again and three more after that. The blows came in different directions and when the final one came, he knocks my weapon right out of my hand, "Looks like you need more practice," 

"Shut up!" I yelled in his face, beginning to get very frustrated, "This isn't a negotiation! I'll let what just happened go for the sake of what's goin' on with ya but I will not pretend like it didn't, now stop playin' games!"

"Games?" Leo repeated while mockingly stalking towards me and I knew then that he wasn't going to stop this charade and whatever he's got up his sleeve, I'd have no choice but to hurt him, "Games are for children, Raphael,"

I was running out of ground and soon I'd need to make my move or run the hell out of here but I couldn't. I'd either be too afraid to leave Leo by himself or my ego would drown me. Which one was better? Neither. Fuckin' neither of those were good. 

I clenched my fists, having both sai's in my hands now and this time, I really prepared myself, "Then I guess you really fit the bill, huh?" I remarked, grimacing at the sight of my brother who was at least two inches taller than me now. He was bigger and looked stronger, but nothin' was a match for me. Or so I thought.

Leo swings at me again and I jump out of the way gaining a few more feet to play around in. On the second swing, I finally get what he's tryin' to do. He wasn't even fightin' me really. If he truly wanted to fight me, he'd of brought his katanas. But he didn't. This was more of a play fight. 

_How cute._

Leo's eyes were on me, staring down my every move and I couldn't really be surprised by how observant he was. He always had been that way since we were kids, but now, now it didn't feel like that. It somehow felt different with him. A dangerous type of difference with pounds of intimidation in his eyes like he had somethin' else on his mind other than this fight.

"Make your move, Leo, or drop this shit!" 

My brother smirks at me one final time, "Fine, enough of the heavy," he says, grabbing me by the wrist and I fight it. Leo bends my arm, making the blade in my hand immediately drop to the floor with a loud clank to the concrete while I struggle with my opposite. I suddenly feel myself slowly falling to my knees and the feeling is intense and we aren't even fightin' one another. He was disarming me just with his hands and I couldn't do anything about it-- why! Why couldn't I do anything! I was meant to be stronger-- faster. After everything that happened, there wasn't meant to be another soul who could beat me down, what the fuck is stoppin' it now?

"H-How the fuck!" I struggled, clenching my teeth as I fought to gain my strength again. Leo forced me down, staring at me in the face and only a blank expression covering his own, "Get off me, Leo!"

"You told me to make my move, Raphael!" he grunts gripping both my wrists now as I fight with all I have to get him off of me but nothin' I do is working. 

"I didn't mean like this, w-we were gonna spar! This ain't how ya do it!" I shout in his face and he tackles me making us both tumble to the ground.

My brother crawls over me and presses his left knee into my chest, holding my body down in a tight grip, "You're fighting me now, Raph? And look," he playfully pouts at me, "You're losing like always,"

I push against his knee and I could physically feel my muscles giving out, "Get off of me!" I growl, fighting harder causing his grip, and weight to only get heavier, "This shit is over! We are goin' home right fuckin' now!"

"Except, we aren't," he stares down at me with softer looking eyes, "Because you have yet to throw me off or make your own move but that hasn't happened yet, has it? Why? Because you can't. You never could," Leo leans halfway down, inches from my face and my face twists into confusion and mixed emotions, "Face it, Raph, I was always better than you and Sensei was right to leave me in charge,"

"Why are you doin' this?" I turn my head away from him as he removes his knee from my chest and straddles my body but keeps his grip on my arms. 

"Because I can," he finally smiles, "Plus I'm just thinking back at all the fights, the arguments, and the silly accusations on how I act like I'm better than all of you just because I was chosen to protect you!"

"I didn't need your fuckin' protection! I was fine on my own and you knew that! But did you care to ask me about it? Did you care to ask how it made me feel when Sensei would prefer you over me?" I try to kick him off again, but it doesn't work because Leo has my legs pinned. 

"Oh, please," Leo breathes out a sigh that hits my neck when I try to pull away from his face, "I loved protecting you, I loved making you mad and most importantly I loved being better than you,"

I writhed beneath him with deep growls erupting from my throat, "You are not fuckin' better than me! You never have been and never will be you prick!"

"Admit it, Raph, come on," Leo says, his voice coming in whispers and I felt my entire body tense up, "Admit that I'm better, that I can do everything better than you and admit that I am the better brother, the better fighter, the better protector, the better every fucking thing!" 

"Shut up!" I shake my head, wanting this to be over, "I'll never forgive you for this if you don't fuckin' stop!"

Leo raises his head up and looks at me in the eyes again but his are wide with surprise and full of deep blues, "You won't have to," he promises before pressing his lips against mine and for a minute, I had thought that maybe this shit wasn't real, that it wasn't happening and that Leo would never manipulate me like this, that he would never try to get into my head and break me down. But the bad thing about it was that this _was_ my Leo. It was my brother and this wasn't my fuckin' imagination. 

I tried to deny his kiss but he wouldn't allow it and grabbed me by the jaw and forced my mouth against his, "L-Leo, mmf~!"

I clenched my fists tight, trying to kick my legs again but I made a mistake by opening them as my brother positioned his body between my thighs and a thought slipped my mind, "It will only hurt for a second, Raph, now be still!" Leo assists and I really start to panic.

The whole trip here, the fight and all the words plus fuckin' Carter and Leo slitting his throat right in front of me and now, this. This was planned right from the beginning and whatever was in my brother's mind, I couldn't think straight. 

"Y-You aren't doin' that!" I resist, putting everything I have left of my strength into fighting my brother, "You can't!"

"Who's in control here, huh?" Leo stops, looking me in the face again and my eyes widen, "For the final time I've allowed you to fail me, Raphael, and when I said fight me you couldn't even do that! How many times are you gonna fucking fail dad!"

"Shut your fuckin' mouth, Leo! You're goddamn sick!" I shout, actually wishing I'd let Mikey come with me. I felt the tears comin' and I couldn't believe I'd let this asshole get to me. I felt weak and beyond more vulnerable than I've ever felt in my entire life. 

I was a failure in my father's eyes long before he died. And Leo, I should have known that more than anyone and now, I didn't even know him. I had no fuckin' clue who was looking at me because I no longer recognized those eyes I loved most about him. 

"Even if you don't like it, brother, I'll force you to, alright?" he narrows at me, "Even if you are a disgrace, your body is still beautiful, okay? I still want you regardless, I still wanna use you to your full potential," Leo coos into my ear and I clench my teeth tight, avoiding the sobs that were begging to come. 

When my brother reaches for the front of my pants, he's shockingly gentle but I react anyway and try to deny everything he wants to do, especially when he releases my left wrist to unfasten the belt around my waist. Leo forces both of my hands above my head and he doesn't let go. 

"Leo, p-please!" 

God, I was fuckin' beggin' him. I was actually beggin' him to stop but he wouldn't listen to me. Leo's eyes were all over me, but the look in them was different. The Leo I knew that I grew up with was there, but he wasn't. He was just in another world, a world he didn't wanna leave and one he certainly enjoyed and whoever handed him the key to the door was like giving a psychopaths freedom or better yet, control and that was somethin' Leo always admired having.

"Oh, Raph," he breathes, his voice sounding so different, so cold on my neck, "You act like you don't want this, but your body always speaks for itself and us amphibians know all about that,"

I felt Leo's hands moving in tons of other places, exploring my body in which he never has before, and listening to his sick words only brought the truth to my mind. He wasn't lying when he spoke and truthfully this gave me some type of thrill somewhere deep down, but it was a thrill I planned to keep buried for a long time, but here we are with me gettin' hard from the thought alone and what was about to happen. It was science for my body to react this way but in others, it wasn't. 

_I just needed to accept the fact that maybe I liked this, but hated it all the same as I did with everything fuckin' else._

"See?" Leo's softening voice broke me from my impossible thoughts and I gasped when the pleasure of him pawing at my erection caught up with me and I was sure I flushed deep when I realized what was goin' on, "You _do_ like it," he licks my jaw and I try to pull away. 

"L-Leo, stop, n-no I fuckin' don't!" I grunt, kicking my legs but he's still pinning me down. 

"Hm," my brother hums and actually listens for once and when he did I maybe thought for a split second that he finally got the picture that I don't want this and that maybe he grew some common sense in the last final seconds but I was wrong-- dead fuckin' wrong. He threw away with my pants, leaving me bare in this open fuckin' space with a dead body only inches from the both of us, "I think I might know a thing or two that you might enjoy," 

I didn't talk or try to fight him anymore. I felt like an utter failure at this point and fightin' my way out of this wasn't going to be something I could get myself out of like all the other times. Leo saved my ass more than once in my lifetime, but now, it was like some payback game he wanted or so it felt like it. 

Leo forced my knees apart and I felt my tail and other delicate areas become exposed to the cool air and I immediately cringed at the thought and wanted to writhe even more but it would just be another failed attempt. I watched from the corner of my eye as Leo licked the tip of his middle finger and pushed it between my thighs and with little difficulty, I could feel the slick tip of his digit prodding at my body and forcing its way in. Leo was in awe when my entire frame tensed up and lifted from the ground. I was clenching my teeth again and my arms were burning from being above my head for so long and after my brother slipped his finger in past the knuckle, I was actually groaning from the pain and mixed emotions. 

"I can only imagine how something else is gonna feel in there," he toys with me, his teeth nipping at my jaw and I growled at his touch trying to fight once more, "Admit it,"

"A-Admit what, you f-fuckin' asshole!" I yelped, trying to close my legs as Leo scissored his finger painfully slow. 

"Admit you like it, fuck, I already have you turned on and now, this, I can't wait to feel how tight you are," he says, making my stomach coil and I released a real moan this time, earning a proud grin from my brother, "Let's see if you can handle another, yeah?" 

"L-Leo," I croaked before I felt it, and all the way in he forced a second finger, thrusting both deeper than before and picking up the speed, "Fuck," I let my head fall back with a light thud and focused more on my breathing than the pain and pleasure. 

"You're doing so good," he breathes against me, curling his wrist to angle his fingers a little differently and inside of my body I felt him touch something-- the tips of his fingers were brushing the inner core of my body and I couldn't control the noises that left my mouth. 

Leo let my hands go and I kept my fists tight as I pounded one into the concrete next to me, "Leo, f-fuck what i-is that!" I asked him, not really knowin' why I did but I couldn't think straight. My body was burning with an unknown desire and this whole time I kept lyin' to myself. 

"It means you're ready," he announces and I open my eyes all the way as my heart hammers away in my chest cavity, "Now be still," 

I quickly shake my head in his direction as he presses a hand hard on my chest to lower me back down on the ground, making my shell scrap along the concrete, "Leo, don't!"

Leo took his time and removed his pants, getting naked right in front of me, and when I looked up at him and the way he towered over my body and just hovered there between my legs for a few seconds, I could feel myself getting even more heated. I didn't know what the fuck was comin' over me nor did I know how to stop it and at this point, I didn't think I wanted to. 

"I said be still! Don't make me say it again!" he demands and I sigh loudly watching my brother rub himself down, making my cock ache at the sight of him touchin' his own, "It'll only take a sec and then it'll be over,"

 _That's not what I said to Mike and I sure as fuck didn't say it to Donnie_ was what I wanted to tell him, but I kept my mouth shut and concentrated on his movements, listening to his own heart pounding in his chest as mine matched his. Leo bent down and kneeled between my open legs and a chill went down my spine that spiked my tail and I released a churr that seemed to move things along a lot faster and for once, I felt myself silently beggin' for somethin' else. 

Leo lubed himself up with his saliva and pressed into me with a roll of his hips, creating an undeniable friction between the two of us that I wasn't expecting at all, "That's it, big brother, take all of me," he praised and I craned my neck all the way back with an open mouth as I felt him fill me, inch by inch. I felt so small during this and I hated it, but this feelin' was different. It was sickly different and enjoyable. Fuck, I couldn't handle the pressure anymore. 

"K-Keep going!" I manage to get out through clenched teeth with nothin' to grip onto until I cave in and grab Leo's arm for support. 

"Excuse me?" Leo questions with clear amusement in his newly found voice that I couldn't deny to be really fuckin' hot right now, "I didn't catch that, Raphie,"

"Fuck you, Leo!" I growled, keeping my eyes shut, "I said, f-fuck, I said keep going!" 

"You don't want me to stop?" he moved, thrusting into me once, inching himself deeper and I could feel the sarcasm seeping from him, "But I thought you said--"

"Fuck what I said!" I yelped again at the snap of his hips, my breathing coming in shaky after every word, "J-Just do it, fuck, do it already! We ain't gettin' any younger here!"

"We ain't getting any older either, Raphael," he smarts off, "Good thing I was just manipulating you," Leo grins and my eyes pop open just as he thrusts into me again and doesn't pause this time. 

"A-Again, you tricked me!" I accused, letting my head fall off to the side, "B-Bastard!"

"Mm," he moaned quietly into my neck while peering down at our bodies pressing together, and at this point, I wanted to hit him. I wanted to fuckin' kill him but I couldn't. Not like this, not now, "I felt a little bad for toying with you again, but now, fuck, Raph, that's all in the past, this is all I ever wanted from you,"

"H-Hate you!" I try to yell but it comes out as more of a churr than anything anger related and I curse at myself for being so fuckin' stupid. 

"Hate me?" he pants lifting his head up to look at my face again and he too was blushing red, "You can never hate me," Leo goes quicker, snapping his hips and groaning after every thrust and I follow along with him, gripping his shoulder tighter.

"Leo, fuck, d-don't stop!" I was losing all innocence when I told him to keep going and he did, making me squirm beneath him, 

"Uh, Raph," Leo was panting a lot heavier now, sounding so hot above me, "You feel even better than I imagined, I've dreamt of this moment so many times, damn!"

I reached down, actually whining like a desperate bitch when I touched my dick, wrapping my hand around it and squeezing it just like Mikey did earlier and I felt it there, the warmth inside of me getting ready to fuckin' explode, "W-Wanna, uh, cum! D-Don't you fuckin' cum i-in me!" I stammered, fisting my heavy cock quickly. 

Leo laughed out, fucking me harder, "I don't like wasting it," he tells me, thinking this is a fuckin' joke, but what's new, he thought everything right now was a joke and I was kicking myself for even sayin' anything to him in the first place. 

I was arching my back and holding my legs even farther apart as I approached the end of this disgusting game, "S-Shit, Leo I'm--!" 

"Cumming!" Leo finishes my sentence while callin' out my name and my dick throbs in my hand as I shoot my load over my stomach and my brother's chest. 

Leo's hands dug into my thighs as I could feel those same spikes again, shooting up and down my spine and straight into my tail making it thrash against the concrete floor, and inside of me, I could feel the warm spill of my brother's seed and on a few final sloppy snap of Leo's hips, he was done. We were done and I was spent while lyin' there. 

My hand remained to be unwrapped from myself and at my neck, I could feel Leo's lips and his delicate butterfly kisses that I soon learned to love and he moved up, kissing a trail to my own lips and I didn't hesitate to kiss him back. I reached up, wrapping my arm around the back of his neck and pullin' him in closer until I felt the sticky mess smearing between us, and I couldn't help but laugh at the feeling against my brother's lips and he rose up again, noticing my amusement and on my chest, he leaned down and actually began to clean me up. 

"Uh, Leo," I tried to control my breathin' as he licked, "Ya don't have to do that,"

"I know I don't," he smirks up at me, "But like I told you, I don't like wasting it," 

I watched him with a scowl on my face until I gave up and lied my head back down, staring up at the shattered skylight windows and once Leo was done, he removed himself from between my legs and I winced at the already fading pain in my back. It's like being near my brother's had an effect on my so-called new abilities and that came with pain and other countless issues I'd need to think about but forget. 

Leo didn't go far and lied down with me as we continued to ignore the corpse that remained to be inches from both of us, "What're we gonna do with him?" he questions, propping his head up with his elbow. 

"Really?" I grin looking over at him, finally being able to rest my legs, "That's the first thing ya ask me?" 

Leo shrugs, "I don't know, what do you say to someone you tricked into having sex with you?"

I rolled my eyes, "The sex wouldn't be a trick if you'd take out the part where you forced me to deflate and kill a guy"

"You looked pretty hot covered in his blood, Raph, what can I say?" he jokes, leaning forward to kiss me again and I followed, smashing our lips together, "Plus," Leo pauses inches from my lips, "I thought about topping you while I was doing it with Karai,"

I grimaced at the reminder, "Why'd you do that?" 

Leo looks into my eyes and I could see more of the blue I knew, "I don't know," he sits up, "She told me that he was beating her," 

I look over at Carter's body and shake my head, "That still doesn't explain why you fucked a chick, Leo, and of all people, why'd it have to be her?"

"It's not that I wanted to, Raphael, she practically fucking threw herself at me and when that happened I didn't really allow my self-control to get in the way of what I could experience with, and that experience was something new that I'm not sure that I liked,"

"Do ya regret it?"

Leo takes a second to answer me but when he does he looks right at me, "Every single second because now look at me-- and look at what I did, what I said to you. I knew what I was doing when I was doing it and saying it, but I wanted to fight it. I wanted to stop myself from making you feel like a failure when you aren't. I took my own insecurities and used them on you because we both fear failure, we both fear the thought of others, especially the ones who look up to us to think we can't do a damn thing right or that we're stupid," he rants on and I frown, immediately feeling guilt, "But when I was with her before this happened to me, the only thing I could think about was you,

I sigh, grabbin' my brother by his head again, "Leo," and I kissed him once more letting my tongue slip into his mouth, and for the next few seconds, we did this until another brilliant yet regrettable thought crosses my mind and I pull back with a pop of our lips, "Shit,"

"What?" he looks at me like he did something wrong and I shake my head. 

"I'm not sayin' I know anything about relationships, Leo, but what you did with Karai would kind of count as cheatin' on your part, wouldn't it?" 

My brother looks down, obviously not thinking of this himself, "I uh, I guess it would," 

"Who the fuck is tellin' Donnie then?" was the last thing on my mind. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	42. ᵀʰᵉ ᴮˡᵘᵉˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this episode, things continue off on a bitter yet hot and heavy end when Cade and Donnie have a chat about his past life and then the two brothers return and send Donnie running for the hills.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸᴵ

ᵀʰᵉ ᴮˡᵘᵉˢ

**[ Donatello ]**

"What're you looking at?" Cayden asked as I pulled myself away from the computer screen

I glanced up at him from my chair, "Do you know who John Gotti is?"

Cade pushes his eyebrows together in thought and sticks his long fingers into the pockets of his dark jeans, "Course, he's a very well known mob boss, though he didn't become popular until the early nineties. And I was there when you went to his house, remember?" my friend grins at me and I flush deeply. 

"Right," I rub the back of my neck, "Sorry I'm just a bit tired. Leo and Raph haven't come home yet, and they haven't been answering my calls," 

"Yeah, I know," he leans down resting his elbows on the desk, "It's nearly what, ten?" I watch as he checks his digital wristwatch before I can mine, "They'll be fine," 

I wanna believe him, but I was already far too ahead of positive, "Yeah, I'm sure," I nod up at him and by the look on his face, he didn't believe my words. He had heard my thoughts long before he even asked what I was doing on the computer. 

He tilts his head towards the screen, "I wouldn't worry too much because the worst thing Raphael could have done was kill someone and we both know that isn't exactly something new to him,"

"I thought you didn't approve of that?" I peer at him and the edges of his lips curl up and if I didn't catch myself sooner, I wouldn't have realized that I was actually staring at his mouth a little longer than necessary. 

"Did you hear me?" he asks and I look at his eyes and admire the way the cooling green surrounding his iris' blooms out to a tangy but golden yellow. 

"No," I clear my throat and look back at the screen, quickly closing the page, "Sorry"

Cade bites his lip, deep in another thought, "I was saying that I don't approve of it. But if it happens, it happens. It isn't always something us immortals can avoid. We can't possibly have self control all the time,"

"How can you avoid it with Lillian then, or even my nephew?"

"How can I with all of you?" he redirects my question, creating his own, "Donatello--"

"Can you call me Don, or maybe, Donnie? I'm sorry-- I just," trailing off I glance back at him, "When someone says my full name, it reminds me too much of my Sensei," 

I can feel that Cade sympathizes with my words and he nods, " _Don_ then," he then smiles, "As I was saying though, even with you, it's not without that difficult. You may be of a different species, but your blood is just as potent,"

"So, how do you do it?" I can't help but ask because I'm feeling rather curious and vulnerable. 

Cade licks his bottom lip and looks up and away from me for a moment and sticking out of the collar of his shirt, I could easily see the black inky artwork littering his neck that appeared to be a bunch of red roses, "It can't really be explained," he shrugs, "I've been apart of this life for a long time and still I can't come up with an answer. I'm living in the body of a twenty-year-old, but my mind goes beyond its time,"

"All of it is quite interesting really if I'm being honest," I gladly tell him and he smirks at me. 

"I'm glad you find my suffering so interesting" 

"Oh," I stop, realizing how that sounded and I start to feel myself panic, "I didn't mean it like--" 

"Don," he interrupts me with a flashy laugh and I see the small points of his teeth, "I know what you meant," 

I was blushing again for some reason and my curiosity was soaring way above my limit, "Am I allowed to know more?"

"What do you mean?" 

"Like, ask more questions. You don't seem to mind when someone is asking about you or your past life," I tell him, turning in my chair. 

"I don't," he shrugs again, "Nobody really cares to know, so ask away"

"Well, mine can be a little weird,"

"I don't care," he laughs again and I nibble on the inside of my cheek. 

_Here we go._

"Can you describe my smell?" 

"Your smell?" he repeats flashing me another grin, "How can I explain it without sounding vague?"

"Be as vague as you wanna be, I don't think there ever was a limit on much where I come from," I elbowed him playfully. "But if you don't wanna tell me, it's fine"

"No, no," he quickly interferes, "Let's see, it's uh, it's very sweet," he begins, "It's a little different from a human stench if that's what you're curious about that's for sure. I guess that's why when I found your brother back in New York his scent was so lingeringly strong to me. But you all have a different type and that doesn't shock me, but yours, if I'm being specific about the subject, is actually so strong that even I surprise myself with how I manage to control my thirst,"

"Oh?" I swallowed. 

"That might sound odd for you, but it's true," he finally looks at me again and I notice the change in his eyes swell from that light green to a much darker red, "It's like I can smell someone's innocence if that makes sense and you'll probably deny it, but I can tell when you're nervous and when you're getting upset. The scent ranges from emotion to emotion and it can be quite intense, especially right now," 

I tried to relax my shoulders as he spoke and I found myself getting a little fidgety in the desk chair, "You're right about the intense part," and we both shared a laugh. 

"You're blushing and that's a clear give away so, let me ask you," he trails off, slowly leaning closer, and behind the frames of my glasses I showed him an anxious expression, "Do I make you nervous?" 

I took a moment to think about being honest, but I think he already knew my answer. He just wanted me to say it, "Yeah, a bit. You're very intimidating and that isn't new with me," 

"Well, you aren't the first to tell me that but, only a bit?" his voice turns to a whisper and he's coming even closer, "You wouldn't be lying to me, would you, Donnie?" 

"C-Cade I thought," I begin as my breathing started picking up. 

_Was he seriously coming onto me when he was with Lillian? The way he talked about her and his past lover always sounded so delicate but him being disloyal to them didn't._

"Thought what?" 

"You and um," I swallow again, "Lillian,"

"What about her?" 

"I thought y-you and her were serious?" 

"We are, so don't worry. I'm not doing anything-- yet," he smirks, "You've got me thinking about things, Donnie. And frankly, your thoughts aren't as quiet either so, don't act like you haven't thought about it,"

"About what?" I blink, biting the inside of my cheek again. 

_Please don't say it. Please._

"Kissing me," he says and I fall deep into a dark hole within my mind, "You and your brothers are open with each other, why not be open with me?" 

"Because!" I say far too fast, "I-I just don't wanna ruin anything with you and Lillian! Plus, I'm not exactly used to human interaction,"

Cade clenches his jaw at the mention of his lover again, "Don't worry-- I'm not too concerned considering she was flirting with Raphael earlier," 

All of my thoughts went out the window, "She was what?"

"Yeah. When we came back from town," he nods, "Michelangelo pulled me to the attention of what was going on, but I didn't wanna interrupt," 

"Why?" I scoffed, thinking of Raph with Lillian. 

"Because I wanted to see how far she'd take things but your brother wasn't having it," Cade chuckles smoothly and lowers his head making his hair fall into his eyes, "It didn't bother me, but I just know I'll have to keep an eye on her. I don't wanna give up on my relationship just because she did something as small as that," 

"Well, I hope you aren't worried about Raph doing anything with her, or any of us for that matter. You know what we uh, well, _do_ in that area, so," I flush again and Cade finally meets my eyes and leans forward. 

"I know," he says and closes the gap between us and presses his mouth to mine. 

A warmth bloomed deep in my stomach and at first, I didn't really know how to react or if I should give back equal the amount of effort but this was new to me. It felt new even if it _was_ with the same sex and his lips tasted like a freshly squeezed orange, but not sour. Definitely not sour. I wanted to pull away or better yet, stop this from happening because I don't wanna risk being caught by Lillian or let this get out of hand but Cade was a handsome man after all. He was more Raph's type though and that's what gave me such an attraction. 

Cade's hand was braced on the back of my chair and when we moved into a lip lock, he rose up and came closer to my body, pressing hard against my lips and making the wheels beneath me roll across the wood floor until I hit the edge of the desk, "Cade," I try to say but he quickly swallows my words with his mouth again. I press the palms of my hands against his equally large chest and with a swift grab, he takes my wrist and moves my hand up towards his throat and mumbles something dryly. 

"My hair," he repeats, pecking my lips and I flush deeply and nod my head, knowing what he wants. I've done enough research about the human body and this was a typical thing that males loved. I slowly slid my fingers into the dark strands of hair on the back of his head and gave it a light tug earning a low groan from him and I responded with one of my own gripping his hair tighter, "Damn," he grunts, blowing heated breaths of air right into my face, "I didn't expect it to be this good-- but it is," 

"Why did you doubt it?" I panted, keeping my fingers in his hair as I spoke, our lips inches from one another with a single trail of saliva leaving our tongues. 

"I didn't actually plan this," he laughs, pecking my lips again and an idea crosses my mind. 

I didn't know why I thought of it right now, but all the times that my little brother had done it for me, I've always wanted to try it myself, and maybe now, it was a good time to try. 

_But how would I start with it? It **was** my friend I was talking about here. _

I pulled away from Cade and looked into his eyes, finding the silence a little awkward but now wasn't really a good time to be feeling awkward or less confident, "Can I uh, can I try something with you?" 

Cade gives me a soft smile and nods his head, "Of course" 

"Stand up," I tell him and he obeys, straightening his spine and I figured that maybe he'd be tall enough to come right where I wanted him to be, but he wasn't. Cade was the only person in my life that currently came the closest to my height but I was just too tall and that made things a little complicated. I took my time and lowered myself onto the floor, standing on my knees at first then sitting on my legs to get a little more comfortable. I bent my feet so that the balls of my heels were resting flat beneath my thighs and in front of me, I finally came to the perfect angle I wanted to be at. 

"Oh, you wanna--" he begins but stops when I look up at him as the light from the computer screen glares off the frames of my glasses. 

"I-I've never done it before," I answer honestly, "Mikey-- he uh, he's got an obsession with putting it in his mouth and I've always wanted to at least see what it's like," 

Cade dips his finger into the bridge of my snout and slides my glasses right off of my face and gently sets them aside on the desk. I blink a few times to focus on his face and I'm blushing again, "It isn't exactly the newest feeling to me if you want my honesty-- but, if you want me to be your first, I would be honored to and I could always guide you through it if it'd help,"

His eyes were filled with lust the longer he stared at me and I nodded my head up at him, "I-I'd like that," 

"You're so cute, Donnie," he smiles at me once more but this smile was much different. It was filled with love and patience and it felt so nice, "Go on then, but take your time," 

My cheeks were hot with anticipation and I followed the steps in my head that were as easy as one, two, three. It wasn't a difficult thing to do but I still felt nervous about it because not everyone's body worked the same. I pushed the ends of Cade's top up until the pale skin of his hip bones were exposed. The happy trail leading down from his belly button and into his jeans was the first thing I noticed and I finally realized that everything I'm seeing-- everything I'm touching and about to do was something I've never experienced before and it felt so good. 

Growing up, me and brother's never had to deal with hair, except for our dad and his fur but the only thing we had to do was clean it up when he began shedding the older he got. 

The curve of Cade's hips dipped low into the belt of his pants and his body was perfectly sculpted all the way up to his pecks. The higher I moved his shirt, the more I explored and exposed. Cade eventually removed his top and threw it on the ground next to me and I was fully able to see his tattoos sprawled out up and down his arms and around his chest. I saw different characters and some I actually recognized inked in many colors and on his ribcage I saw a scripture of writing that was done in cursive. The only word I could make out was something about his mother and I immediately felt my heart swell in the heat of the moment. 

He was patient with my movements and admired every touch and look I gave him as the tips of my fingers dragged down the middle of his stomach and into the crevis of the hard muscles of his abs and I took a chance and leaned up a bit, inhaling his scent and every part of him smelt of some type of cologne I didn't know the name of but it reminded me of something strong-- like whiskey maybe but mixed with Paris. 

Moving lower, I unfastened Cade's belt and the top two buttons on his jeans and downed the zipper as I was growing a tad bit impatient. I saw a little more hair when I got a good look at his boxer briefs and for a moment, I looked up and Cade nodded his head at me to go ahead, "Touch me, Donnie, it's okay."

I bit at my lip, wetting it as I gently tugged down both his pants and underwear. I flushed deeper, feeling the heat spread throughout my body when his member sprang free and I was stunned to see it so close up. I had seen mine countless times and of course my brothers but Cade wasn't a mutant or a turtle. He had clear skin and on the shaft of his cock, I could immediately see the thick veins that stood out from how hard he was. His member was actually closer to mine or Mikey's size if I looked at it right and the tip was a cute dusty pink and glistening at me. 

I touched it, tracing the veins and the curve that traveled underneath his length and back up, biting my lip again, "God, Donnie, please, I hate the teasing" Cade begged and I was getting hotter as I've never made someone beg before. Slowly I wrap my hand around his cock, pumping it slowly at first and knowing fully what to do but silently wishing I had some lube to make things a little smoother but I knew I'd manage. 

I swallowed thickly and leaned in, letting my tongue stick out and run wetly across the head and dipping my head lower, allowing my taste buds to explore until Cade's member was just resting on my cheek as I lapped away at the base, "Fuck, Donnie," he groaned above me causing embarrassment to flood my insides. Cade took his fingers, tipping my head back and resting his thumb on my lower lip while demanding my next move, "Open up for me," and I did, parting my lips and allowing him to slip the first few inches into my mouth, "You gotta relax your throat, Don, I don't want you getting too excited and choking on me, yeah? So go slow and work yourself into it,"

My heart was beating so fast in my chest that I thought it was going to burst out and the taste alone was brilliant and better than I had ever expected, "Y-Yes," I mumbled before closing my lips around his cock and suckling him in deeper, feeling myself really getting into it like I knew I would if I could just get over my insecurities. 

I rested my left hand on his hip, stroking what I couldn't get into my mouth while my opposite hand was down in between my legs rubbing my own erection to its full mass and I couldn't stop myself from moaning around Cade's length. I kept jerking myself and stroking feverishly at my dripping member, knowing I wouldn't last long enough to keep this up. 

"You're doing so good, Donnie, fuck!" Cade praised while groaning again as his eyes never left mine or what I was doing for him, and myself. His fingers were curled around the back of my neck while the others were on the desk behind him. He was gripping it tightly and even started to move his hips, thrusting into my mouth and making his cock go deeper. 

_'I can't believe this is happening'_ was the only thought on my mind and the hope that nobody walked in on us but I didn't stop, not until I was done. 

"Shit, Donnie, d-do you want me t-to cum?" he questions, hips twitching as he forces himself into my mouth, sliding his thick cock in and out between my lips at a faster speed and after each thrust, I felt the tip of his member poking at the back of my throat and I had the urge to gag but I remembered what he had told me to do and I did, squeezing my eyes shut, a heaving mess and right on the edge. 

I whined desperately and loudly around his length and within seconds, my mouth was filled with the warm liquid seed right around the same time my own shot a rope of cum onto my fist and down onto the floor, creating a small puddle between my bent knees. 

My eyes began to water when I tried to swallow every last bit of Cade's bitter release. I expected it to taste as sweet as Leo's because after we made love, I've gotten curious a time or two and tried it after we were done due to most of the substance leaking out of me, including my own.

After the next few seconds, silence filled the room and nothing but our attempts to catch our breath were to be heard until I glanced up at him and flushed, "D-Did I do it right?" 

Cade's eyes softened at me, "Oh, Donnie, of course, you did," he praises, taking my hand and lifting me from the floor after he helped clean up with his shirt. 

"I um, I really enjoyed it," I chewed on my lip, still being able to taste him and as he buttons his pants back up and fiddles with his belt buckle, he grabs me by the back of the head again and forces me into another kiss and I don't hesitate this time, slipping my tongue into his mouth. 

Our lips were slick and squelched when we pulled away to catch our breath again, "I won't be able to forget this, so, don't worry. I enjoyed it more than you'll ever know," he pecks my lips one last time. 

I crawled back into my chair a little shaken up and ran my fingers across my lips, unable to shake the thought of what I just did, "I'm really glad to hear that," 

"Well, if you don't mind me changing the subject-- before all of this," he gestures to his shirt and looks down at it in his hands and the visibly white stains on the black material, "Why were you looking at stuff about John?"

"Oh," I clear my throat, it feeling a little sore now, "I actually planned to look at something else but when I hopped on the web, I saw an article about how he was found dead yesterday morning and I just-- wanted to see if they released further information. They are saying it was a homicide,"

"Wow," Cade breathes, "Damn, really?" 

"Yeah, I don't know if the others know but I'm kind of concerned for his daughter, Angel. We didn't know her all that well, but she was only fourteen I think," 

"Do you have any idea how much money that man had?" Cade questions with sarcasm in his tone and I shrug my shoulders turning back to the computer to pull up the page again to let Cade have a look, "She will survive for years on his dough,"

"It isn't very likely after what they found in his home and other numerous properties," I determined while pointing at the screen, "The police said that they found countless amounts of stolen evidence beneath his baseboards, the attic and of course stored away with his millions," 

"It doesn't even say that. How the hell do you know this?" Cade asked looking at me and I grinned shamefully at the keyboard. 

"I have backdoors installed within the NYPD database, okay? You kind of have to if you wanna keep track of who needs saving and whatnot," 

Cade grins at my confession, "The evidence they found, what was it pertaining to?"

"The Gambinos, murder trials, and crook snitched cop files that helped Gotti get out of court thousands of times due to him wanting to avoid confrontation about his business," I tell him while typing out a few things on screen and within seconds a collage of photographs started popping up with a few other things including cold cases that the police refused to investigate.

"I knew that man," Cade says pointing at a photograph of a male in an unzipped body bag, and on the file, there was no information about him except for the possible reason for his death, which was an ice-pick to the forehead, "He worked as a librarian for more than twenty years back in Manhattan until the place he resigned in burnt to the ground. If he was home that day he would have probably died a lot earlier, but he wasn't,"

"Did they ever find out how the fire was started?"

"Yeah, but it took them more than a week to figure it out but when they did, it was said that the fire started because of an explosion in the basement. They later found the remains of a homemade bomb in the rubble but no other evidence was found except for an old janitor's uniform with his name on it," he continued, looking back at the screen, "Rick it was. He was a good man, but only God knows what he was mixed up in,"

"Looks like he was mixed up in the mob as well, but I don't think it matters anymore. Gotti is dead and the only person left to take his place is Angel, but she's so young and I doubt she'll ever step up considering he was never there to take care of her," 

"She'll probably end up in a foster home for the troubled youth like I and my brother did," he frowns, sitting on the desk. 

"You have siblings?" I asked, taken by surprise as I took my attention away from the computer.

"Two actually and uh, they are quite a handful," he smiles, "My sister, she's brilliant and beautiful but Aiden, he's trouble to reckon with but he's grown a lot since we've been kids. In fact, he'd be perfect for Mikey."

"You said you were in a foster home, are they your real siblings?"

"No, neither of them is blood to me but I treat them like they are," he smiles, "I'd do anything for them but we're spread out all over the place and there isn't much room to stretch a connection with anymore,"

"Why were you in a foster home?"

Cade blows out a troubled sigh and crosses his arms over his naked chest, "My hero growing up was my mother and my father wasn't. In fact, I hated him so much that I killed him before I became what I am," my eyes widen at his words as I slip my glasses back on so I can pay attention a little easier, "I know, horrible and a bit forward for a seventeen-year-old but when I was fourteen, my mother passed away due to a sickness that I now know as lung cancer and on my personal record it says my father gave me away not long after her death, but that isn't what happened,"

"Go on," I encourage him, feeling outrageously curious with his background. 

"A year after she died I ran away from home, trying to get anyone on my side to put my father behind bars, but nothing worked no matter how much I tried because he had his hooks so deep in the community. When it came to his attention, it wasn't long until he found me, brought me back home and started doing what he did to my mother to me, which included beatings and even rape," he lowers his head, "And for the next three years until I was seventeen, I took care of him," 

"But why?" I interrupted, though regretting it, "He did all that to you and you mom!"

"Because, Donatello, my father too was sick but with something else, something that would make him suffer just like she did and one day-- the one day I waited for. The anniversary of her death. I cooked a meal she taught me and when I served lunch to my father that day, he had no clue that it was that day of all days and he also didn't know that I put three teaspoons of pepper in his food, which he was allergic to," he pauses with a smile creeping onto his face, "It wasn't the death I was hoping for but it did the trick and when he started choking and ballooning up like a whale, I told the paramedics that I had just gotten home from work and I found him dead,"

"And they believed you?" 

"Oh, I made everything so convincing" he promises, looking at me, "I made sure to toss everything that I used that day into the fireplace that manually had to be burned with wood and nothing traced back to myself. I even cried and everything-- it was perfect," 

"Do you ever regret it?" 

Cade blinks, staring out into the distance of the room, "Maybe sometimes but I can't say that I fully regret everything I did to him. Not after my mother," 

"I'm really sorry-- about her," I glance down, thinking about Sensei again and Carter. 

"Don't be. Since I was still a kid to the state and not above the age of eighteen, I was forced into the foster home I mentioned and that's where I met Aiden and about four months in, we were inseparable no matter how much of a dick I was to him and no matter how much he annoyed me daily-- plus," Cade tilts his head rubbing the back of his neck shyly, "He was the first person I ever fooled around with"

"Oh," I then flushed coming to realize that that's the reason he's so comfortable around me and my brothers. 

"Don't act so surprised. You couldn't have pinned me for straight, Donatello, it's too obvious," he grins, touching my shoulder and I bite my lip but then releasing it between my teeth, "We were in there nearly a year until one day a single mother walked in with a little girl at her side, asking to adopt a boy-- a teenaged boy because she wanted someone she knew she could trust with her daughter and when she saw me and Aiden together, she immediately wanted us. And since then, she always said that she planned to adopt a boy but ended up with two instead and that it was the best decision she ever made," 

I was nearly in tears by the time Cade finished talking and when I went to wipe my eyes, downstairs a scream is heard along with glass breaking and as soon as I and my friend hear it, we're at our feet and running downstairs to see what is going on. 

"Lillian! Lillian are you alright!" he shouts, skipping three stairs at a time and when we both get into the living I nearly collapse into Cade. He was frozen solid and in the living room by the door, my brother finally had come home, and standing next to him was someone else, something different. 

From the downstairs bedroom, I heard the breaking sobs of my nephew who was woken up. 

"We're back, Donnie," Raph says as my eyes never leave the other one. 

Lillian takes a step back and moves towards Cade who is happy to take her hand and pull her closer to his chest, "What is that?" she whispers to him but he doesn't answer. 

"Did you say we're?" I question, taking a step out into the opening and the closer I got, the more I could see who the mutant was but barely. He stood a few inches taller than Raph and the thick muscles all over his body were more obvious than the huge rips on the familiar looking pants. 

"Yeah, we're," Raph simply states, keeping to himself as if he's waiting for something to happen. 

_He's never this quiet._

I moved closer, "Leo?" I finally said it and he stares at me, keeping his expression neutral. I then stretched my arm out, hesitating at first until the palm of my hand rests just on the surface of his cheek. 

"Yeah, Donnie," he sighs when I touch him, reaching up to wrap his fingers around my wrist, "It's me, it's me,"

"God, what happened to you?" 

"I don't know how you're gonna take it," he tells me, sounding completely off. 

I scoff, removing my hand from him, "I told you not to go with Karai! And you," I look at Raph, who's head was hanging low, "Why didn't you return any of my calls?" his eyes turn up to look at me and something about them worried me. I then slowly turned my head to look at Cade and Lillian, "Cayden, I hate to ask you for a favor now, but would you mind taking Codey out of the house for a bit, I'd like to talk to my brother's alone and I don't wanna keep waking him up from his naps," 

"Oh god," I heard Raph mutter to himself and I shoot him a heated glare. 

"Of course," Cade nods his head at me, "Lillian would you please go and get Codey for me and we can go see about that movie you mentioned earlier this morning" 

Lillian agrees to go out with Cade and when they are gone, I take the time to notice that Mikey isn't around but now I didn't have much patience left in me to care right now. 

"Donnie," Leo begins but I hold my hand up. 

"Don't even start," I point at him, "I told you not to go with her. I did, didn't I?" 

"Yes, but--"

"But nothing! Are either of you ever going to grow up! We have a very limited time until Venus gets here and you are all being a bunch of idiots!" 

"Donatello!" Leo yells and I take a step back, "Carter is dead!"

I shake my head, "Good riddance, I don't really care about him right-- wait, how-- how do you know that anyway? What even happened!" 

"Karai was tryin' to set Leo up, Donnie!" Raph adds, "It was all a fuckin' plan to inject us with this shit," he holds out his hand and in his palm is a glowing green syringe, "There were four of these. Two of them were destroyed and this is the only one left,"

"And you have the other one?" I asked Leo who looked full of guilt. 

"That's how I got like this in the first place, Donnie," he says, looking at our brother. 

"Did you and Karai fight or something?" 

I was so confused right now and I didn't wanna deal with any more trouble or stress. I've had enough of it, especially with Venus on the way. I didn't want to risk exposing her to what nonsense this world has to offer, but I doubted that I'd be able to even do that. 

"Fuck, Leo, just tell him!" Raph growls at him and I await, hearing only the thuds of my own heartbeat, "Or I will!"

"Tell me what?" I quietly ask. 

Leo looks at everything but me and for a second there I thought he was going to turn and leave the room, "I had sex with Karai," he confesses, but not finishing yet, "I then found the serums and when I did, she caught me off guard and then, when I was injected, I lost control and killed her,"

I didn't talk or say anything to either of my brothers. I slowly let my eyes fall to the floor, trying to control whatever emotion was trying to escape from my mind, my heart, and most importantly my mouth. I was done with talking and I was done being around them. 

When I looked up at Leo, his eyes were filled with worry but mine, they did not mirror his and they did not show pity at all. I then took my chance and turned to leave the room. I headed straight for the basement where everything I needed was at. 

"Don?" Leo called after me but I ignored him as I reached the bottom of the stairs. 

Raph and my brother followed me unfortunately though I didn't say a word to them until I felt a hand on my arm. I turned so quickly that I got a little dizzy and before I could stop myself I slapped Leo. My hand landed with a loud pop and he released my arm and backed away from me, looking stunned. Raph mimicked Leo's expression and stayed away. 

"Don't touch me," I look at the both of them, "You wreak of so many things that I can barely breathe, so don't touch me. Neither of you. Don't touch me. Don't touch me ever again!" I warn them, turning to shove my things into my backpack. 

"What're you doin' then?" Raph questions after giving Leo a hard look. 

"I'm leaving" I answer, zipping my bag and adjusting the straps so I can fit it over my shell. 

"What?" they both said at the same time. 

"I'm leaving-- and I'm gonna have Cade set up a plane for me to Japan,"

"Donnie," Raph scoffs, coming closer but keeping his distance, "What about the baby?"

"Venus is coming with me," I turn, snapping the headpiece of my goggles in place. 

"You can't fuckin' do that!" my brother yells, "You can't just leave an take her with ya!"

"I am, and I can," I finalize before picking up the incubation dome, releasing it from it's secured lock and putting it into its second built version which makes it portable and safe for the egg to handle and before I go back up the stairs, I can see that Leo and Raph are silently fighting for their lives but I don't care enough to allow them to try. 

_I was done._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahaha, I'm back again TMNT lovers and with another long fuckin' entry! 
> 
> I enjoyed this one just as much as I did the last one, ugh, so much drama and filth. Were you expecting that? Huh? Probably not, or maybe you've caught on to all of my tricks!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	43. ᴬᵉˢᵗʰᵉᵗⁱᶜᵃˡˡʸ ᵁⁿᵖˡᵉᵃˢⁱⁿᵍ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this episode, Mikey returns and finds out about what happened between Donatello and the brothers. And he isn't happy.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸᴵᴵ

ᴬᵉˢᵗʰᵉᵗⁱᶜᵃˡˡʸ ᵁⁿᵖˡᵉᵃˢⁱⁿᵍ

**[ Michelangelo ]**

No calls, no text messages, or anything the entire time I was gone. I lost count of how many times I checked my phone. I saw nothing on there except for my wallpaper of me and Raph in bed together, but he was asleep and crushing me and I'm talking about literally crushing me but I didn't care. I loved it when we cuddled and now, he barely looked at me. 

After coming back to the cabin around two in the freaking morning I decided that now would be a great time for a drink. I head straight for the kitchen and stood on my tippy toes to reach the middle cabinet above the sink and pulled down a bottle of some type of alcohol. I didn't really care what it was, I just wanted something to put a pep in my step or maybe help me forget about the neglect and sexual tension. 

"Where the hell have you been?" as if on queue the devil himself asked as I finished off a shot from the bottle and slammed the glass down on the marble countertop. 

I mocked him, knowing he can't see me, "I went out, is that an issue for you?" I said, filling up the glass again after flipping it over. 

"No, but this definitely is!" Raph says snatching the glass and the bottle from me and dumps it all down the sink.

"Hey!"

"You promised me you wouldn't drink again!"

"Like you give a shit, Raphael," I roll my eyes and start to walk off but he grabs my arm and I stop, scowling at him for touching me, "If you did, you'd of noticed my absence and you'd of called me!"

"You've become so selfish, Mikey" he shakes his head releasing my arm. 

"Excuse me?" I stare up at him in utter disbelief. 

"Donnie fuckin' left today!" he growls in my face, trying to keep his voice down. 

My breathing slows as I look at my mate, "What?" 

"He left and took Venus with him," 

"Donnie left? Like, gone? Where'd he go?" my voice was rising in pitch and I was starting to feel really panicky, "Where is he, Raph?"

"He said he was going to Japan," he answers me, but I didn't understand him. I wanted to cry my head off.

"How could he leave, what happened?" I demanded to know, tears already in my eyes and Raph grabs me by the shoulders, "Why did he leave, Raphael!" 

"Would you stop!" he sighs, looking away because he hates seeing me cry but I can't help it, "He said he was done with things. He was so stressed and said that we weren't prepared for the baby and he took a plane to Japan at Cade's request,"

"But why!" I shouted, tears spilling down my cheeks, and from the corner of my eye I see something move and I jump behind Raph with a squeak. 

Raph turns not fazed, "Leo, I thought you were asleep?" 

_Leo?_

"Raph," I said, tapping on his shell, "That isn't Leo!"

The giant turtle walks into the kitchen and if this was a cartoon, I'm sure my eyeballs would have popped out by now. Everything about him was sort of different but familiar. He practically looked like Raph's twin but taller. Huge even. Like, really huge. This definitely isn't Leo, he was only half of my big brother's size. 

"Unfortunately so, Mike," he says and I sniffle my nose and narrow at him, letting go of Raph. 

"Your voice is different," I point out and he watches me, "If you're Leo, then prove it, tell me something no one else except you know!"

His expression changes with thought and then he grins at me, ignoring the glare from Raph, "When you were fifteen, I caught you putting one of your nunchucks up your--"

"Alright, alright!" I interrupt, immediately feeling flushed, "Jeez, you really are Leo," 

The grin on his face grows at my expression, "I told you,"

"Can someone tell me what the shit is going on?" 

Next to me, Raph huffs loudly but sounding exhausted, "It's simple really-- Leo ran off with Karai, they fucked as a setup--"

"That part wasn't a setup!" Leo defends himself, clenching his fists.

"They fucked," Raph continued, "Then she shot his ass up with some type of steroid shit, and he killed her, and then he manipulated me into killing Carter and then--"

"Enough!" I tell him, "None of that made any damn sense-- wait, I'm sorry did you just say he did it with Karai?"

"That's exactly what I said, Mike," Raph confirms and I look at Leo with disgust. 

"Ew, dude!" 

Leo rolls his eyes, "Is everyone just going to keep freaking out that I had sex with a girl, or are we gonna figure out how to fix this?" he motions at his own body and I stare for a minute. 

"Personally-- I uh, think you should stay the same,"

"Mikey!" Raph scolds me. 

"What? He looks freaking hot and you know it so don't say no, no, no, I don't think that!" I mock on, opening, and closing my hand to mimic my brother running his mouth. 

"Guys!" Leo shouts, "Would you two idiots focus!" 

"Hey--" I shove him, "Don't ever call me that!"

"What're you gonna do about it?" Leo cocks his head and I stare into his eyes feeling my anger begin to boil over. 

Raph steps in between the two of us and gives me a warning expression, "If I were you, I'd leave him alone, Mike,"

"Oh, and now you're fucking defending him! You two look alike, might as well, right!" I spit and the expression on Raph's face changes. 

"If I can't control him then what makes you think you can ya little shit!" 

"What does that even mean?" I asked with little care in my voice as I suddenly craved yet another drink but not alcohol.

"Would the three of you please keep it down!" another voice boomed into the room and in the doorway, I saw Cade looking very angry. He had a pair of glasses on and his hair was a little out of wack for once, "Codey is sleeping upstairs in my bedroom now and if you wake him up again, I promise you the next time I have to come down here, I will not be as kind!" 

A small sigh escapes Leo, "I'm sorry about that. We'll try to be quieter next time, your royal highness"

"There won't be a next time for either of you, smart ass!" Cade says and I frown, looking down being reminded that Donatello is no longer here and neither is the egg. 

Without saying a word to either of my brothers or friend, I leave the room and go down to the basement where the genius would always be. I glance back up the stairs when I get to the bottom and hope that neither of my brothers follows me. 

I go and sit down on the ground next to the tool bench and pull out my phone again, ignoring my wallpaper this time, I swipe around and speed dial Donnie's phone number. After all seven rings, nobody picks up but I keep trying with another call, and eventually, the other end of the phone picks up and I sigh out of relief. 

"Donnie?" my voice was quiet and a little broken when I spoke his name. I loved Raph and Leo so much, but Donatello was my backbone, my extra shell even if I annoyed him to the point where he just gave up on his current invention. 

The other side of the call was quiet for a long minute, "Mike," he says, and I nearly release a cry when he says my name, "Is everything okay?"

"Am I okay?" I ask, "No, no, I'm not okay! You left, why!"

"Because," he breathes, "I just couldn't handle it anymore,"

"Handle what? Why couldn't you talk to me before you left, we could have worked something out. You didn't have to leave!"

"But I did!" he argues, sounding stressed, "Leo did that with that girl and-- I just, I can't handle the negativity anymore, Michelangelo," 

I could relate to his words but I still missed him more than anything right now. I hated when Raph did things with Leo and sometimes Donnie but for some reason when he fooled around with Leo it gave me a different type of jealousy and sometimes, I couldn't shake it. 

_I loved being with all three of my brothers but we weren't the same unless together._

"I want you to come back," I admit, leaning my head back against the wall, trying to avoid another breakdown.

"Mikey-- I can't,"

"Then let me come there with you!" 

The call was silent again and then, "But you hate Japan, Mikey,"

I had to confess that I haven't thought about what happened in Japan for a while. Sometimes I'd like to forget it, but in others, I wanna say it made me a better person. Plus, the scars on my body reminded me daily of how bad things had gotten before all of the other stuff came into play. I experienced what love, hate, and all things bad meant. I was able to feel it for the first time since I was a kid because this life I'm living now, is a different type of love, hate, and all things bad. 

"I don't hate it, D, I just-- I don't really care about that anymore, I wanna be with you! It isn't the same without you," I go on, curling the ends of my toes and clenching my free hand into a fist, "We aren't the same without you, and you took Venus,"

"She doesn't need to be around the stress," he tries but I'm not having it. 

"It doesn't matter, Donatello! She's ours too and you know that. That was the plan remember?" 

"What plan, Michelangelo? For Leo to run off and be freaking stupid! He isn't the same, none of you are!" he argues, sounding as broken as me. 

I hear loud voices upstairs and if I truly wanted to I could tune in and hear what the hell was going on up there, but I didn't care. Not right now. I only hoped that my brothers would just leave me be and let me talk to my best friend. I turn my head away from the stairs and focus on Donnie's voice, "The plan, D, the fucking plan when you told us you were pregnant! You told me that having this baby would bring us together, well, now there is no baby and you're across the damn globe!"

"Do you think this is easy for me?"

"No, but--"

"But nothing!" his voice rises and on the other end I actually could hear him sobbing and it took everything in me not to join him, "I miss you guys more than anything-- but if Leo doesn't grow up, then I can't be around you. I'm so sorry, Mike, but I can't! I don't know him anymore!"

I clenched my fist even harder while trying to avoid crushing my phone, "What are we gonna do about him?" 

"What do you mean?" he sniffles shuffling around. 

"The serum,"

Donnie then sighs, "Do whatever you have to do," he tells me, making his words sound like a goodbye, "I left one of the samples in the basement in the top drawer by my desk. I have the other one and I plan to do some research with it, or better yet, experiment with it. If anything Mikey-- I want you to be the one to find out the secret behind that stupid green ooze,"

I laugh, sounding sad, "You want me to study that green goo? You can't be serious!"

"You can do it," he encourages me pathetically and I shake my head, "You've spent years watching me do that stuffy Mikey and I know that you can do it,"

"You know that you can't keep us apart, right?"

Donnie takes another minute to think his answer through because he knows, "Yeah, I do, but that's a point I'm willing to try and make because whether Leo is in his right mind or not, I still think he needs a reality check,"

"He's different," I mutter, thinking about my older brother. 

"Heh, you're telling me," Donnie agrees, "He's too different though he was timid. His words were him, but they weren't. It doesn't make any sense. I'd probably kill Karai myself for what she did but considering the job is already been done I can't really do anything" 

"We can't be apart," I change the subject again, trying to ignore the aching my chest, "Especially when I know our baby girl is gonna be here soon," 

"And when that day comes, you will be the first I call," he tells me, him knowing it isn't good enough, "I have to go now, Mike," 

"Donnie, please, come back," I croak, gripping the phone tighter and for a second, I could have sworn I heard something crack. 

"I love you," 

"Donatello!" I shout before he hangs up and I throw my phone against the wall, fighting my tears so hard that I feel a ball of rage rising in the back of my throat. 

I stand up, heading straight for the stairs and immediately zooming to the top, looking around for the person who I knew was the blame for this. I heard the shouting getting louder the faster I moved and I was actually stomping when I walked and in the living room, I saw my brothers arguing on about something I couldn't give fewer shits about and by the time Leo saw me approaching him, he wasn't ready for the swing I took with my fist.

"Mikey!" I heard Raph shouting and when I bucked my legs and kicked my feet, the only thing I remember seeing and hearing was glass shattering and loud crashes. 

My body was vibrating all the way to the tips of my fingers and in front of me, was a giant hole, a broken window, and possibly a destroyed front porch. Leo was lying in the snow at least a yard away from the cabin and from the hole, I jump out, catching about thirty inches of air. 

Leo slowly stands to his feet with puffs of white dust falling off of him and he's huffing out large breaths of air with clouds of fog appearing in front of his face which twists into pure anger and I don't regret my actions one bit. 

I felt a hand on my shoulder when I landed on the ground and my instinct was to fight, and I did. Grabbing the wrist of the stranger, I yank them over my shoulder and they tumble into the snow and I see that it's Raph, "Get out of my way!" I shout at him and he jumps up, looking a little flustered himself. 

"Mike, I know you're fuckin' pissed but you can't do this!" 

"The hell I can't!" I growl at him and the expression on Raph's face drops, "He's the reason for Donnie not being here with us, Raph," the tears in my eyes were there again, haunting me and beating me up and I point at Leo across the yard, "He's my best fucking friend, and it's your fault that he's gone, dude! It's your fault that he's in Japan and never coming back!" 

"Mike, please," Raph was begging me but I didn't care. 

"I don't wanna fight you over this!" Leo yells, fists clenched at his sides and his pants were soaked from the snow, "I'm fucking sorry, Mikey, but we can't do this-- I can't control my strength, I don't wanna hurt you,"

"Hurt me?" I cackle like a maniac, throwing my head back as if what my brother just said was truly a joke, "You think you can hurt me? That's really funny, Leo, really--" I pause, wrapping my hand around the chain of my nunchuk, "Really funny!"

"Mike, he's tellin' the truth!" Raph shouts, trying to grab me, "If you fight, then I fight, please,"

I turn my head up at my mate, "If you don't get out of my way-- then you'll be next," I warn him, and slowly move past my brother, twirling my weapon skillfully in my hand, over and under my fingers and into the air. 

"I won't tell you again, Michelangelo," Leo says but his voice is lower than before as if he was trying to warn me off with his intimidation but none of it is working nor will it ever. 

"You don't tell me what to do anymore," I simply say before running and jumping into the air again and when I almost land on my brother, swinging the object in my hand he dodges every shot and tries to leg sweep me but fails and I launch myself at him completely blacking out again. I ignore the screams from behind me and before I know it, I'm triggering the scythe in my nunchuk and it pops out. 

Leo kicks me off of him and I flip into the air and land on my shell, "Enough!" he shouts but I don't listen, "Enough of this Mikey!" he spits at me. 

I could feel the energy in my body charging up and I slam my fists on the ground, creating a wave of snow and rocks. It opens halfway across the ground and splits with a loud crack, "It's your fault he's gone!" I swing my arm again, allowing the chain on my weapon to stretch so far that it wraps around Leo's ankle and I yank so hard on it that he falls on his ass. I then make my move and jump on top of him, wrapping the chain around his throat and locking it in place. 

"M-Mike!" he chokes, trying to get his fingers underneath the metal link around his neck. He pulls and pulls on it as I stare down into his eyes and he's actually pleading and pathetic looking in the face. 

I grip the chain and force him onto his knees, "Donatello is gone, because of you! Because of your fucking antics, because you didn't listen to him when he told you to stay! You aren't loyal, Leonardo Hamato!" I lean down, tears spilling down my cheeks, "And you definitely aren't my brother anymore!" I shout in his face and the expression my brother gives me nearly makes me stop but the tighter I pull the chain, the more I don't wanna let go. I was tired of the drama and stress just like Don was and now I understand, I see it. But I see it in a different way. 

Leo chokes out again and the white of his eyes was turning red and the smell of blood was lingering in the air and up my nose. My grip on the chain never let up until I felt a pair of arms wrapping around my body and pulling me away from my brother, "He's had enough, Mike, enough!" Raph says into my ear and I try to get out of his arms. 

"Let me go!" I thrash, clawing at his arms and I drop the chain. My cheeks are still stained with tears as I yell and try to get away, "Raph!" 

"Mikey! Would ya please calm down?" my brother holds me in place and I start to sob again as Leo coughs harshly to get air after being choked. 

"Let me fucking go!" I cry lowering my hands over my face, finally giving up the fight and breaking down. 

"Jesus, Mike," Raph says, turning me around and holding me close to his chest and over his shoulder, I see Cade standing in the giant hole in the side of the cabin but he doesn't move or say anything but in his arms, I see my bouncing nephew. I hug into Raph tighter and continue to cry. 

_We can't be apart._

The words repeated in my mind. 

_I love you._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, man. I love super emotional Michelangelo. I love it when he gets angry especially and then when he cries nobody can stay mad at him and he's so precious and underrated. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this one because even if it was me writing this, it was regardlessly sad for me. I miss Donnie as much as Mikey does and he's right, they can't be apart nor will anyone be happy until everyone's together again. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


	44. ᵀᵉqᵘⁱˡˡᵃ Sᵘⁿʳⁱˢᵉ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this episode, Raph is able to calm Mikey down and then do the same for Leo but in a much different, wholesome type of way and things turn for the worst when another stranger is brought into their lives.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸᴵᴵᴵ

ᵀᵉqᵘⁱˡˡᵃ Sᵘⁿʳⁱˢᵉ

**[ Raphael ]**

I've never seen Mikey likes this. I've never seen him so deep in his emotions and broken and I too blamed Leo for this shit. I blamed him for a lot but then I showed sympathy like the fuckin' softie I was and I couldn't help it. I loved Leo, I love Mikey more, but I felt like Leo and I have been through more emotionally with each other and I sometimes keep findin' myself leaning on him.

It was nearly daylight and neither I or Leo have left Mikey alone since he threw down outside. He nearly killed fearless and it was honestly a little scary but completely refreshing for me. Once I got him back inside and up to the bed, he hadn't let me go. I was lying down with him and he was huddled up at my side with his head on my shoulder and buried in my neck. When Mikey died and came back as somethin' more, he not only changed but something deep inside of him gave him the little boost he always needed growin' up. He'd always let me push him around and sometimes I only did it because I wanted to rag on someone who wouldn't dare fight me back. But now, the tables have turned and everyone is either dead, half-dead or just slowly draggin' the fuck by and it was frustrating me. 

I let the soft sounds of Mikey's breathing relax me but Leo was here too and he kept his distance. Especially when Mikey refused his offer to carry him inside. Mikey may be an unstoppable force to reckon with, but he kept his emotional baggage and sense of humor and that I am thankful for, though he's more dangerous than I am and I thought I'd never fuckin' say that. 

"Ya know you can sit down, right?" I tell the brooding bastard who was standing next to the undraped window. 

"I do enough sitting" he refuses and I roll my eyes, tryin' ta stay calm considering I have a sleepin' mutant on me. 

"Then what _are_ ya gonna do?" I ask and Mikey moves closer to me, his arm stretched over my shoulders and around my neck. He truly didn't wanna let go, nor did he want me to. I was stuck here until he was ready to move again. 

"I should talk to, Donnie,"

I glance over at him after nuzzling the side of my little brother's head and he churrs happily in his sleep and I nearly smile because doin' this just brought me back to when times were better. When we didn't worry about the drama and bullshit. If we never moved into that apartment back in New York, this shit would have never happened and we'd still be happy. Sort of. 

_I regretted it all far too much._

"What do ya plan on sayin' to him?" I tilt my head a bit, knowing he knows I'm looking right at him, "I hope you've got some legendary apology hidden away in that shell of yours,"

"I don't know what I've got but I do know one thing-- his words, they keep going around in my mind and the more I fucking think about it the more it drives me crazy. It seems like no matter what I do, I'm letting someone down, Raph. I can only imagine what Sensei would think if he was here to see all the damn mistakes I've made," 

"Look," I breathe, givin' Mikey a quick check before movin' out of bed and replacing my spot with a rather large pillow that he takes eagerly once I'm out of reach, "I know you hate feelin' like some royal jackass, but fuck, man, we all make mistakes. I know I don't say it enough and shit, maybe I should, but why care so much about what dad would think? He was the guy who raised us, but that doesn't mean we gotta live and do shit for him. I loved him just as much as you did, as much as we all did, but you've gotta get that crap outta your head, Leo and start thinkin' for you, and only you," 

_God, I felt like a goddamn therapist. But Leo needed this. He needed to hear the truth._

"I hate myself for making Donnie so upset. I never thought in a million years that he would just get up and leave one day because he's so fed up. I didn't think our group was that broken," he lowers his head, deep in thought. 

"Are ya even listenin' to me?" I go to stand next to him and with this bein' said, I have ta actually look up to speak directly with him.

"I am!" he sighs, frustrated, "I've come to realize that I never took Donnie's pregnancy seriously and I wasn't even there when he gave birth, and that's telling you something-- right?" his blue eyes glare from the moonlight as he peers down at me, "I always end up fucking something up and I've done it so much that he's finally fed up with me. My own mate, my genius," Leo frowns. 

I rack my brain for somethin' I could possibly say after his own words and I can't really figure out how to say what I wanna say. I couldn't even figure out who to be mad at. I wanted to protect everyone, I wanted everyone in this little circle we called **the** fuckin' family to be whole again, but I didn't see that happenin' anytime soon. 

I lightly tapped Leo's arm and he looked at me again, "Do you remember when we used to go above ground without Splinter knowin' and it was just you and me?" 

"Yeah, and when Mikey caught us trying to sneak out he wanted to come with and I said no," the edges of my brother's lips curl up into a small smile as he remembers how stubborn Mikey is and always will be, "He got mad and literally went to wake Donnie up to tell him about what was going on and when he did that--"

"You caved in and let em' both come with us and since then, we kept doin' it until we met April,"

Leo's smile grows at the memory and then he frowns, "Things weren't the same after that,"

"Oh, no, course not, considering Mike's ugly mug made her faint," I tease, and with that Leo cracks and even bigger smile and chuckles briefly. 

"I miss her, you know?" he says and I nod, immediately knowing who he's talkin' about. 

"I do too, man, I do too," I agree, "But hey-- I still wanna beat the piss outta Casey though,"

"He's probably all alone after our last encounter," he grins, "The woman he was seeing I'm sure is terrified now and couldn't take surprises like myself,"

"He's a douchebag-- doesn't give a fuck about his kid," 

"Which reminds me," Leo turns, "What're we gonna do about the decision with Codey?" 

The subject of this kept coming up since we spoke about letting the Tribunal raise our nephew, but I wasn't as keen on doin' it like my brother's thought I was. I actually thought of somethin' a bit better. Before leaving the room, I lean over Mikey and give him and a quick kiss, hoping that he stays asleep until morning. 

Leo follows me when I go downstairs to find Cade in the living room, sweepin' up the glass from earlier. I couldn't even ignore the hole in the wall it was that big but luckily the owner of this fine establishment doesn't care about holes, only fuckin' glass. 

"We need to talk," I tell him only earning a glare, "About Codey,"

"What about him?" Cade questions, continuing to sweep which quickly irritates me and I snatch the broom from him but gently propping it on the wall next to me. 

"What're your plans with Lillian?" 

"I don't know," he shrugs, walking into the kitchen, "Why does it matter and what does it have to do with Codey?"

Leo stays silent but following my lead, "Because, we wanna make sure he at least has a mother figure when we leave for Japan," I confess and Cade pauses before taking a drink of his water. 

"What're you saying?" 

Leo steps in, "We think it's best if you'd take care of him. We originally planned for him to live in Japan with the family of the Tribunal. They are wonderful people and have taught us a lot over the last fifteen years, but we were thinking that maybe if he stays with you, and we allow you to adopt him, then he has a better chance at a normal life," 

"Have you forgotten that neither of you or me lives a normal life?" Cade says, finally doing away with his water bottle, "What makes you think I can give that little boy a normal life?"

"Because you're responsible," Leo tells him, not holdin' back his honesty because he and I both knew it was true. We were incapable of bein' responsible around another human. 

Cade laughs and I look at him, tryin' my hardest to be fuckin' serious about this, "We aren't playin' games here. We honestly want you and Lillian to take him in before we leave,"

"Lillian and I won't be doing anything together," he clarifies and now I'm confused. 

"What the hell does that mean?" I scoff as if I didn't just hear that. 

_Those two were inseparable, unless--_

Cade doesn't stop staring at me as he speaks, "I thought Lillian was someone I could depend on because of her ancestry. She comes from a long line of fine women, fine men, and fine fucking people, but that doesn't mean she's perfect because not everyone in the family seems to follow the same rules,"

I squint at him and next to me, Leo is looking confused as well, "What, so you and her ain't together anymore?"

"We are, I haven't said anything to her. I haven't said anything to anyone except for Donatello,"

"About what?" Leo questions, uncrossing his arms. 

I waited to hear what I knew he was going to say and I honestly wasn't in the mood for this. 

"Lillian came onto your brother here," our friend points out, but motions to me and I roll my eyes at his words, "He nearly kissed her from what I was told,"

"What?" Leo gushes but with a little bit of amusement in his tone. 

"And you are a fuckin' liar!" I accuse with a loud outburst, "She nearly kissed me, her fuckin' hands were all over me!"

"Because you let her!" Cade shouts back, "You fucking let her!"

I push past Leo but he grabs me by the shell and pulls me back, "Don't, we don't need this right now, do you or you," he gestures towards Cade, "Realize that?"

I shake my head, "Lillian was afraid of me," I say ignoring his constant glare I'd like to beat off of him, "We were just talking to one another, so, I showed her that there ain't nothin' to be afraid of and I allowed her to touch me, but not in the way she attended," 

"Why the hell did you let her touch you?" Leo mumbles to me, eyes looking dark. 

"Because, when we were talking-- she was tryin' to be like all sympathetic and shit, and when she reached across the counter to touch my hand, she got scared!" 

"See," Leo glances at Cade, obviously trying not to think more into what I just said, "This wasn't on Raph, so don't blame him,"

I clenched my fists and thought up somethin' that I was hesitant on saying at first, "If I wanted your girl, I would have taken her already despite her bein' afraid of me,"

The expression on Cade's face twists but then the grin I hated returned, "Oh, like how Donatello had no problem getting on his knees for me?"

The entire room fell silent and next to me, Leo's breathing slowed and the grip he had on my shell tightened, "You're bluffing" my brother said with a simple voice. 

"Now, why would I bluff about that?" the bastard continues to grin at me and my brother and I knew then that this was a big fuckin' mistake. 

"Let's go, Leo," I put a hand on his chest but he's as still as a boulder, "Leo!"

My brother blinks and glances down at me for a moment until he leaves the room without a word. I quickly look at Cade, "You're lucky he didn't rip your fuckin' head off,"

"I'm lucky _you_ haven't yet," he states and I agree with him. He is. 

"Look, I'm equally as mad as Leo right now, but for once, I've gotta put that shit aside, alright?" I say to him with an outreach of my hand, "I've got too much to worry about and one of them is gettin' Leo back to normal and then gettin' us to Japan, so what's it going to be?"

Cade takes his time answering me, "I can help with both," he pauses then grips the edge of the counter, "As long as you stay away from Lillian," 

"I told you already!"

"I know what you told me and--" he sighs, "I've been through this so many times and I look at you and your brothers like regular people, like friends, like family-- and with her, I just wished it wasn't one of those things again. It ain't you but I just don't trust her,"

"You have a right not to, but let's talk business,"

"Business?" he laughs, "About the kid, right? If you want my honest opinion, I think adopting him would be a great beginning for me, for my life and maybe it'll keep Lillian in line because she too is waiting for a chance to leave Homer,"

"So, you will do it?" 

Cade grins, "On one condition,"

"Oh no," I roll my eyes. 

"You let me come to Japan with you," 

"But why?"

"I was originally from South Korea on my mother's side, so technically I'd be in my homeland, plus, I and you are kind of linked together, wouldn't you say? On top of that, I don't think you will be able to make it without me all the way over there," he winks and I shake my head walking away. 

"Hey--" he stops me, "About Leo, I know that Donatello left one of the mutation samples here with me, but I, unfortunately, do not have much experience with that type of science, so, I decided to fly in someone who does,"

"Are you fuckin' nuts? You can't just bring a total stranger into this situation!" I begin to raise my voice as panic runs cold in my veins at risk of bein' exposed. 

"He isn't a stranger, Raphael. He's my brother, I'm sure you will like him and if not well, then join the club, not many people do," he laughs and I look at him skeptically. 

"Fine but--"

I'm interrupted by a call from upstairs and it's Mikey shrieking out my name, "Raph! Raph, come quick, Leo passed out!" 

"Fuck," I mutter before running out of the room with Cade fast at my heels. I got to the top of the stairs and in the hallway, my brother is face down on the floor with Mikey at his side trying to wake him. 

I immediately flip him over to check his face and luckily I see no blood, "The fuck happened?"

"I-I don't know, I woke up, looking for you and when I came out, he was like this!" Mikey panics bringing Leo's head into his lap. 

"Raphael," I hear Cade say to me, "He isn't breathing" 

I turn my head and watch as my friend checks my brother's pulse with his wrist and that's when I go into a panic, "Leo," I lightly tap his cheek with the palm of my hand, "Leo, fuck, get up!"

"W-Why isn't he breathing!" Mikey starts to cry and shakes our brother by the shoulders.

Cade performs a typical CPR routine on Leo's chest with no luck, "Mike, I need a knife, can you please go get me one?" he asks while still pumping his arms over my brother. 

"A knife? W-What the fuck do ya need a knife for!" I yell at him and I slap Leo's cheek again. 

"Just please, go get me one!" Cade raises his voice and Mikey jumps to his feet to head downstairs to the kitchen and within seconds he comes back, nearly tripping up the stairs and falls to his knees next to me and in his hand, he gives Cade a long knife that was made to chop fuckin' vegetables or something and then Cade glances over at me, his expression hard with worry and concentration, "Give me your wrist,"

"What?" 

"This is the only way I know how to get him breathing again, now give me your wrist, we don't have much time!" he admits and I hesitantly stretch my hand over to him and he takes it, positioning the bladed knife right at my forearm and slices a long but thin cut into my skin and at first I expect it to hurt but it doesn't. I felt nothin' but pressure which for the first time in my entire life, scared the shit outta me. 

Cade puts my arm at an angle where my blood can drip down and fall right into Leo's welcoming mouth which he forces to open carefully and when he's done he rips some material off of his own shirt and wraps my arm with it. I blink with confusion but also thankfulness. If we didn't have our vampire friend, the fuck would we do? 

"That totally wasn't gross but also appetizing at the same time," Mikey jokes and I glare down at him, making him flush deeply at my demise, "W-What I mean is, is he gonna be alright?"

Cade doesn't answer either of us for the next sixty seconds or so but when he's about to, that's when Leo's eyes pop open and he turns into a coughing fit as relief rushes over me. A bit of a smile creeps up on my face when he looks up and sees me, "What happened?" he coughed, tryin' to catch his breath. 

"By the looks of it, you fainted," Cade states, "You seem to be severely dehydrated, Leonardo and on top of that your heart stopped which could be for numerous reasons,"

"It stopped?" Leo questions with fear laced in his words, his eyes meet mine then Mikey's and he nods his head our brother. 

"We thought we lost you," Mikey sighs, wrapping his arms around Leo's neck and lying there for the next few seconds. 

As we gather ourselves from the floor and help Leo back into the bedroom, I'm finally coming to thought with the final verdict on what to do, but I'm not only worried now, but scared shitless. Leo was always healthy-- he never did that before. Not like this. Never like that. 

Looking out the windows, the sun is finally coming up and the rest of us without my sickly brother gather downstairs in the living room again, "What's our options here?" I say letting the words fall effortlessly from my mouth and Mikey glances up at me with the worry of his own. 

As Cade is cleaning his hands with a wet towel he takes a moment to think on my words, "We only have one real option here and I don't really think it's our best one," 

"I'll risk anything to get him back to who he was," I promised and I felt Mikey squeeze my hand with praise when I admit to my words. Our lives were all over the place again and for only a second I thought things would be better when Leo got his memory back and Donatello lived through the birth of our daughter and then nearly gettin' shot, but as the sayin' goes, nothin' never fuckin' lasts and it was eating my alive. I wanted to be happy with my brothers, with my mate, with my family but I couldn't do that now even if we didn't have shit botherin' us. Donnie was gone, he was done with us. He wanted us to learn 

Just then the doorbell rings and Mikey jumps with another shriek, "Oh, no, we gotta hide!" he says, pulling on my arm and I stare down at him again then at our friend who nearly laughs.

Cade shakes his head, "Relax," he consoles, "You won't need to hide around my brother,"

"Brother?" Mikey asks with a confused tone and then looks at me again and I shrug my shoulders, hoping that Cade was right about this dude, because I wasn't in a fightin' mood.

When Cade goes to open the door, Mikey stands close to me with both hands wrapped around my arm and waits as the stranger is greeted with a hug and kiss on the cheek. The guy walks in and is about three inches shorter than Cade but the color of his hair immediately catches my eye. It's styled up in a bright but flaming red tone and the tattoos on his skin automatically tell me that this dude was definitely Cade's brother, or at least his twin. He looked nothin' like him but he was oddly similar and from what I heard, he's got some kind of accent I couldn't pin.

Cade brings his brother into the living area, holding one bag in his hand, "These are the men I told you about," Cade points out and the look on the guys face is priceless. 

"Woah," the ginger freaks and slowly comes forward to get a better look at me and my brother, "So, you weren't lyin' huh? Damn, and I had a bet with Troy and everything back home,"

I felt an immediate frustration with this kid when he spoke but I kept to my peace and let him admire the mutants in front of him and when he met my eyes, I could see an obvious nose piercing including an eyebrow, lip, and ears. 

"Be nice, would you? They aren't really used to disgusting freaks like yourself," Cade teases and the redhead bursts into laughter. 

"Oh, I'm sure," the kid gushes while waving his hand in the air and then he smirks at me, "Do you and this little dude have names?" 

Mikey is the first to speak when he unhooks himself from my arm, "Michelangelo," my little brother greets with a flashy smile and I could already see a deep connection between these two that I didn't like, at all, "But the ladies like to call me, Mikey!"

"Oh yeah?" the guy laughs and Mikey joins him, "Well I guess that's somethin' we've got in common huh, it's nice to meet ya, Michelangelo, I'm Aiden, or better yet, Cayden's better looking adoptive brother!" he wiggles his pierced brows towards the other pale freak in the room. 

"Oh, please," Cayden rolls his eyes like the drama queen he is and takes the bag his brother brought in downstairs to the basement. 

"And what about you, tough guy?" Aiden says, raising a brow at me with an included smirk and then I see the color of his eyes and they match the deep garnet red of his hair. 

"What about me?" I tilt my head at him. 

"A name, do ya have a name?" he asks all smooth like, and then it hits me, his accent _was_ familiar. 

"Are you from Russia or some shit?"

Mikey slaps my arm with a loud pop, "Raph!" 

"I am, actually-- thanks for noticin' but I wasn't born there or anything-- my bastard of a father gave me this voice while my mother was a street walking whore that left me in a basket the night I was given away-- but yes, yes, I am from Russia! Vladivostok to be exact my green friend," he smiles hugely, and Mikey giggles quietly next to me. 

"I'm Raphael," I finally admit and Aiden nods with improvement while stroking his hairless chin. 

"Wow, haven't heard that name in a long time-- in fact, I haven't heard those types of names, in like ever," he confesses with a playful shrug. 

_Ugh._

"They were named after the cultural renaissance painters, Aiden," Cade says coming back into the room, and during the rest of the conversation, this new guy and Mikey make small talk on and off and even laugh at one another from time to time. 

I didn't like him, but I'd have to deal with him. At least until Leo is better and that's if he gets better and if not, then I'll do whatever it takes to make him better again. 

With or without Donnie. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	45. ᵀʰᵉ ᴿᵉᵗᵘʳⁿ ᴼᶠ ᴿᵉᵈ ᴿᵘᵐ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this episode, a steamy phone call leads to devastating but confusing news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, hello, I have returned, yet again!
> 
> Before you get into this one, I'd like to talk about a few things. 
> 
> I have had a few requests from not only one but a few people who read my series about the pairings in this novel and I'd like to discuss this with my readers before we go any further, like, book three further!
> 
> Since the day I got into TMNT ( Turtlecest ) I have always loved Raph with Mike and Leo with Don. But my favorite is Raphangelo. In this novel, from the very beginning--including the first book, I've told people that I originally planned for this series to be about them, only about them, but it quickly turned into something more that I've learned to love a lot. I don't want to make this note too long but--
> 
> I will not change the plotline plans for anyone who just randomly gives me a request. I will take suggestions, I freaking love suggestions and feedback but someone asking me to change a plan in the plot will not happen. If you don't like the plotline or the pairings in this series then you do not have to read, I would completely understand. I will not be blocking anyone, I will not be hating on you. 
> 
> I try my hardest to give everyone respect and love even if I don't know you. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and share my endless amount of obsessive-ness that I have for my four sexy turts. They've made my life so much better and the story I have behind my reasons, still makes me feel warm inside. 
> 
> For any further questions, feel free to ask, suggest, or just talk to me within all the social media I've put in my bio or just comment down below. 
> 
> I won't keep you guys any longer, I know you're just 'dying' to read the next chapter and I've kept you from it for too long! I enjoyed writing this one but the ending-- ugh. 
> 
> I love you guys, thank you for fifteen-hundred hits I never expected things to go this far. 
> 
> Cowabunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸᴵⱽ

ᵀʰᵉ ᴿᵉᵗᵘʳⁿ ᴼᶠ ᴿᵉᵈ ᴿᵘᵐ

**[ Michelangelo ]**

"So, why exactly do you need his blood?" I asked curiously to the brother of our friend as he pulls the sharp end of the needle from Leo's arm and patches it up with a brightly colored bandaid. 

"Well," the redhead pauses just before checking the syringe, "In order for me to figure out what's going on with this guys body-- I'm gonna need a sample of his plasma and the serum, and this just gives me both at the same time," he smiles, pulling the rubber gloves off of his hands with a snap. 

"How do you know so much about this stuff?" Leo questions before I can and I cross my arms stubbornly and wait for our so-called-new-friend to give us the explanation that I deserved. 

"I worked alongside Cayden a lot when he was in college, but I veered off towards the nerdier side of science while he got stuck in the nosebleeds if ya catch my drift," he winks at my brother, "Hints why he can heal people so easily,"

"Heal people?" Leo repeats sitting up in the bed but I push him back down by sitting on his lap and facing Aiden. I quickly earn a glare from my older brother and a giggle from our friend. 

"I've never known that douchebag to heal people," I mock sickly and Leo smacks my thigh, "Ow, the heck was that for?" 

"Don't be rude," Leo scolds me and I flush at his stern but indifferent tone. 

"We've always called Cayden the healer of our group, so, when someone is dying or they are hurt, we can always rely on him," he goes on, "Each one of us has our own little name,"

"What's yours?" I tilt my head.

"Well, I get called annoying a lot, so that's probably one of them," Aiden laughs and stands up, carrying a small bag with him, "In about an hour, I will call for you. Until then, be patient. I have a lot of things to figure out. Especially with you," he points at Leo and we both look at each other with suspicion. 

Once I and my brother are alone, I wonder for a moment where Raph could be but then again, I could care less. I was still mad at him regardless of the cuddling I got. I was still upset with Leo as well but, he was sick, so, I had to drop my little act and give him some space from my attitude. At least until he's better, which he _will_ be. 

"Are you okay?" he asks and I look over at him, still sitting in his lap. 

"You're asking me if I'm alright?" I giggle, "You should be asking yourself that, bro,"

"Well, I'm obviously not okay so why shouldn't I ask about you?" he squeezes my hip and I flush again at his words. 

"Um, I'm not doing the best but I'll get better when I see Donnie again," I shrug at him but making sure he knows what I mean. 

"I still need to talk to him," Leo frowns and I nod my head dramatically. 

"Yeah, you definitely do," 

"What am I meant to say?" 

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe a, I'm sorry for turning straight for like ten minutes?" I point out with raised brows and Leo glares at me. 

"Who said I was fully gay?" 

"Ugh," I groan in disgust and try to climb off of my brother's lap, "You're nasty"

Leo wraps his arm around my shell and pulls me back, "Does that mean you're disgusting for always hitting on April?" he peers at me with a smirk. 

I stop squirming and stare at him, "That was a long time ago, Leo,"

"It doesn't matter,"

"It does matter!" I hop off of him, "Whether this crap doesn't matter to you or not, it does to Donnie and if you don't show him you mean business, he will forever be done with us, because of you! Like right now, he doesn't wanna be around us _because_ of you,"

"Mike, we don't live by the same rules as humans do, it's different!" he tries to argue. 

"It fucking isn't, dude! We are turtles, I get that. We are who we are, and you forced us to believe that years ago when we had that chance to be something as real as humans, but in reality-- we are no different than them," I clap my hands, keeping my attitude forward, "I love all three of yous with all of my heart and since this started, we made that step to be committed and you have _not_ been committed!" 

Leo crawls out of bed and I take a step back, preparing myself, "You want me to be committed, huh?" he asks quietly, his eyes darkening.

"Yeah! Because that's how it's meant to be!" 

"Then why don't you ask your boy about Lillian? Why don't you ask Don about taking it in the mouth by that prick downstairs!" Leo growls, clenching his fists, "I am not the only one in this fucking house who made a mistake! Neither of us is loyal, including you!" 

I gasp, "I haven't done anything with anyone except you guys!"

"Enough!" Raph yells into the room, "The fuck is goin' on up here? Aiden is tryin' ta work!"

"Who gives a fuck!" Leo shouts back, obviously still pissed.

"What do ya mean who gives a fuck?" 

I sigh, "Do you two ever stop?" Raph and Leo both look right at me when I speak, "There's so much shit going on and all you wanna do is fucking fight!" 

Before they can stop me, I leave the room, needing to be alone. I go into a bedroom I've never actually been in before and lock the door. The bed was made and everything was very clean and I figured that this will be a nice place to lay low for a while until I'm ready to talk to those assholes again. I fell down on the bed and pulled out my phone, already dialing Don's number. 

After four ridiculously long rings, he answers, "Mike, I was sleeping-- what's the matter?" his voice is raspy and sexy after he just woke up. 

"Sleeping?" I scoff, "It's like, two in the afternoon here,"

"Right, but I'm nine hours ahead of you!" he croaks irritated, but I don't really care.

"I just wanted to hear your voice, D,"

The other side of the phone falls silent and then my brother sighs, "Yeah?"

"Yeah," I lie back, propping my head up with my arm, "I miss you," 

"I miss you," he says and a smile stretches across my face, "Have you and the others figured out the serum yet?"

I rolled my eyes at his question, "Well, the guy Cade flew in is trying to,"

"Guy?"

"Yeah, Cade's brother,"

"Oh, right," Donnie says as if he's reminding himself, "He told me he has a brother and a sister,"

"Yeah, you and that dude really hit it off, huh?" I ask, trying to make the subject in my mind really come through to him. 

"You know huh?" he confirms and I smirk a bit. 

"Yeah, and so does Leo,"

"God," Donnie breathes on the other end, waiting for my next response. 

"How was it?" I bite my lip. 

"What?" 

"You know," I bob my head even though he can't see me, "How was it?"

"You aren't mad?" 

I look around the room, thinking about his question for a few seconds because in reality-- yeah, I was a little angry about _another_ brother getting down with _another_ human. It sounded weird and felt weird in my own head but whatever because even I have had my curiosities. 

"No, not really,"

"Not really?" he repeats after me with a snort. 

"Yeah, I'm sure you had your reasons, like Leo did," I state, and again, the phone fell silent. 

"How is he?" Donnie's questions with a mysteriously quiet tone. 

"Why don't you ask him yourself?" 

"Because I-- I just can't speak with him right now! It's too awkward," 

"He's an asshole for doing what he did, but regardless of his actions, Don, he loves you. He loves us and hates himself for causing this to happen,"

"Can we please talk about something else?" he asks sternly and I sigh, playing with the ends of my mask that is slowly falling apart. 

"Fine, fine, but you still haven't answered my question yet," 

"What-- oh," he pauses, "It was, nice," 

"Just nice or just curious?" I grin knowing that he's blushing right now. 

"Sort of both,"

"Oh come on," I laugh, "I've shown you countless times and I guess it really got to you,"

"Shut up, Mikey!" he groans, shuffling on the other end of the phone and I laugh harder, "It wasn't as good as I thought it was going to be,"

"Why not, did he smell bad or something?"

"No, no, um, it was more of the taste than the smell,"

"Ah, the finisher tasted bad, huh?" 

"Yeah," Donnie answers, dragging the word. 

"Salty or Sour?" I ask trying not to crack myself up. 

"Yeah," he says again, giving me an answer for both. 

"Man," I giggle, covering my mouth, "That dude must not eat enough fruit,"

"Probably," he finally joins me in a laughing fit until things die down again and I bite my lip at a thought suddenly entering my head. 

"So, it's like, real late over there, huh?" 

"Yeah, nearly three now," he answers shuffling around again and my guess is that he's still in bed, of course. 

"Wanna fool around?" 

"Mikey!" he scolds me and I giggle at his response. 

"I'm serious," I look around, keeping my ear out in case of interruptions. 

"We really shouldn't be talking like this right now," he sighs, frustrated and I roll my eyes, "I need to get some sleep,"

"You can," I tell him, sliding down my shorts, "After I'm done with you,"

"Oh," he whimpers on the other end and I grin confidently knowing that I've got him exactly where I need him. 

"C'mon, we're both alone. Right?"

"Yeah," he answers, "But you aren't,"

"I am for now. Plus, the door is locked and I'd rather be away from the others anyway-- it's why I annoyed you so much while you were working on one of your dinky little inventions," 

"Dinky?" he gasps, sounding offended. 

"I always found it really hot when you worked," I purred into the phone, rubbing the pad of my finger over the slit in my lower plastron, slowly working myself up and knowing this won't take long at all until I have my cock out, "It's why I stuck around. I loved watching you work with your tools and get all frustrated,"

"Mike," he whines again, still trying to deny this, but I know he wants it. 

_Who wouldn't want me anyway? A crazy person, that's who._

"Like right now, I'm imagining it. I'm seein' you with your tools, all sweaty and flustered after working so long-- all day," I bit my lip harder, feeling my slit part a few inches, and my heart started hammering in my chest, "You work so hard, so much, and all those times that you'd shy yourself away from us, I'd be thinking about making you feel better,"

"Why didn't you?" he pants and I grin again, leaning my head back. 

"During those times, everyone was still in the closet, remember?" 

"We both were fighting to come out and you knew that, so, I don't think it would have mattered, Mikey," he says, and thinking about it now, he was right. Don was always right and now, I wish I would have. I truly do. 

"I should have, huh?" I giggle breathlessly, "I should have come in there one night and bent you over that desk of yours and had my way with you," 

"God, you sound like Raph when you're trying to be dominant," he pants, shuffling again.

"Is that a good thing?" I chuckle, being able to slip the tip of my finger inside of my slit. 

"Hah, what do you think?" he questions, sounding completely out of breath. 

"I think it's just my world known charm working on you," I tease, tugging on my bottom lip with my teeth and on the other end, I hear a gasp which triggers the release of my cock and my head falls back on the pillow again, "Damn,"

"A-Are you, uh," 

Wrapping my hand around the base of my erection, I give it a slow stroke, "Now I am," 

"I figured you'd already be doing it," 

"Nah, I was slowly going at it, you know? I never really take things slow, dude, but we _are_ having phone sex, so, why not savor the moment?"

"I-I really like when you talk, Mikey," Donnie churrs and I tug at my cock again, "I like hearing you t-talk to me,"

"I bet you do, Donnie-Boy," I release a churr of my own mixed with a laugh, "Into that dirty talk, like me,"

"Uh-huh," he hums. 

"You using your fingers, D?"

"Y-Yes!" he gasps out and I thrust my hips up, forcing my dick through the grip of my hand. 

"Good, that's what I want. How many?" 

"O-Only one for now,"

"Do another," I demanded with a whisper, staring down at my throbbing erection, and at the tip, I see my pre-cum making an overdue welcome. I lick my lips and smear it all over myself, "You've always been the most flexible out of us, so, I'm sure you could handle your whole hand,"

"Fuck," he groans pathetically and I work my fist faster, dragging my fingers down the moist base of my shaft, and with that, I let my eyes shut, imagining my nerdy brother fingering himself. 

"You said you like hearing me talk, but when you curse, Don, it's like music to my ears," I tell him and he hums at my words again, churring into the phone. 

"F-Fuck, Mikey" my brother whines out my name and I feel my body quiver all the way down to my toes and up the curve of my spine. 

"I hope you're imagining those fingers being my dick," I bite my lip again, darting my tongue out to wet my mouth for the millionth time, "Because if I was there, I'd be inside of you, so deep, balls deep, Donnie, pounding you, fuck,"

"M-Mikey, ngh! I-I'm gonna cum!" he churrs out his warning and I suck in a sharp breath through my nose, squeezing my eyes shut and flicking my wrist even quicker. I'm arching my back and lifting my hips up from the mattress, seeing every little snippet, image, and thing go down in my head, giving me that last push. 

"D-Donnie, ah, I'm gonna give you that c-creampie you ordered!" I moan with an open mouth, feeling my cock throb in between my fingers and I'm spilling out over my stomach, which creates a pool of my jizz in between the creases of my plastron because I was really trying to avoid getting any on this bed. Cade would have my nuts in a sling if I did, considering this is probably his bed. 

On the other end of the phone, the only thing I hear is the soft breathing of my brother, and one of the biggest smiles I think I've ever had creeps on to my face, "I didn't think I um," he swallows his breath, "I didn't think I needed that,"

"Well, now you do," I point out teasingly and lick my fingers to clean up the remaining mess, "You should uh, probably clean that up, unless you'd like me to,"

"I wish," he sighs, "However, I feel more tired and that's your fault," 

"I miss you, D," I tell him before ending the conversation altogether. We say our goodbyes and I frown when I stop hearing his voice. I lay my phone on my chest and breathe in deeply before rising up from the bed to pull my shorts back up and right as I stand, I hear my name being called from downstairs. 

I roll my eyes at the voice and collect myself with a quick look in the mirror before leaving the room and jogging down to the basement, where I find both my brother's but Leo is sitting and he doesn't look well. Raph glares at me when I enter the room but I shrug him off and look at the redhead sitting at the desk. 

"What's the matter?" I look at everyone with wondering eyes. 

"We did some research on the serum," Cade answers with arms crossed and looking serious. 

"Where the fuck were you?" Raph questions but again, I ignore him. 

"And?" I keep my stare on the other two brothers in the room. 

"To keep the explanation short, the serum in Leonardo's blood is slowly deteriorating his cells," Aiden holds up a glass slide of a liquid sample that's all black and purple, "This was a sample of Leo's blood alone, and eventually-- this is what his entire blood count will look like without immediate change,"

I look at Leo, pulling my brows together with concern and then back at the slide, "What does that mean though?"

"It's killin' him, you idiot!" Raph barks, punching the concrete wall and it cracks along the center.

"Raph!" Leo quickly scolds and glances over at me with saddening eyes, "It's true, Mike,"

"But we can help him, right? Keep him alive, right?" I question thoroughly but with panic. 

"We can, but only for a short period of time," Cayden answers for me, "My blood will only make him weaker, but Raphael's on the other hand or even yours for that matter will keep him going a little longer than we can. But the serum eating away at his nerves will soon be too strong to act on and we have only but two choices," 

"The only choice is him livin' you dick!" Raph snaps again but this time his voice is louder, "No other fuckin' choice, but that one!" 

"Raphael, I already told you the risk!" Cade snaps right back. 

"What's our choices?" I muttered, clenching my fists at my sides and I felt my heart ache at the words. 

Cayden slowly came forward to stand inches from me, "If Leo continues to consume blood for the disease, he's at risk for becoming weaker and suffering more long term, kind of like chemotherapy,"

"The more blood we give him, the more we'll be feeding the serum," Aiden jumps in, "It's kind of like a parasite in a disgusting type of way," 

Cade gives Aiden a sharp, but annoyed look and then turns back to me, "Our other choice puts him at an even bigger risk. We've never actually seen such a thing before and we've lived a long time on this planet and gone a long way when it comes to medical concerns, but this, it even bypasses what immortality can give him,"

"What?" I shake my head with confusion, "Does that mean we can't save him if he dies?"

"It means that if we try and save him, it would mean we would have to inject venom while he's _still_ alive," Cade explains but looking at Raph this time, "It's one way we never try to pursue," 

"Why not?"

"Because Mikey-- it fuckin' hurts, it's horrible!" Raph says and I look away, reminding myself to try and forget the evil memories of Raph after he became what he is now. 

"Unfortunately-- your brother is right. It isn't a nice feeling and I bear the regret of committing such action on him while he wasn't sick. But, if we risk doing that to Leo, there's a chance the venom won't work, it will probably kill him a lot faster in fact because of his own mutated blood and the serum together," Cayden sighs, closing his hands over one another and in my eyes, I could feel the tears already spilling over. 

"It's kind of like one big battle to see who wins," Aiden tries to joke but nobody laughs at his attempt, "You either win or you lose on this one and the chances of winning are ninety to a million, and that's never, ever a good fight," 

I glance at Raph, feeling the wetness on my cheeks, "What if we use our venom?" 

"We thought about that. But both of you are still so very fresh. So, we are unaware of how the effect would be," Cade says, walking back over to the desk. 

"But," I blinked rapidly trying to keep my temper down, "Raph used his on me!"

"That's true, Mike," Cade nods, rubbing his chin, "But, you weren't sick. Just dead," 

"This is bullshit!" I yell, "Are we even gonna try and save him! I've already lost Donnie, the fuck am I gonna do if I lose another brother, huh? Dad is gone, April is freaking dead and we're giving Codey away! All of yous are just pussies!" I shout even louder and turn to leave but before I do, I punch the wall just like Raph did, but with the impact, I leave a hole the size of my fist.

Raph grabs my arm and yanks me back down the stairs, "You aren't going anywhere, you understand me? We are packin' are shit and goin' to fuckin' Japan to be with Donnie so you can stop whinin' so much! Leo is fuckin' dyin' and all you can care about is who you're with and how you feel about this!"

I turn and sideswipe my brother right in the jaw, "You wanna know something?" I look around the room seeing the surprisement in everyone's faces and then my eyes meet with my mates and he looks genuinely hurt and completely angered, "We may be brothers, but we sure as fuck aren't lovers,"

I pull myself out of Raph's grip and disappear from the room, needing to be as far away from my brother as possible. The trip we planned to take, the bullshit I would have to endure was going to be smothering but tolerable. I could feel my respect for my mate slowly dropping and it was breaking my heart piece by piece and I didn't know how much longer I could handle the separation, the arguing, and change. 

_I wanted it to be over already._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	46. ᴸᵒᵛᵉ ᴵˢ Fᵒʳ Sᵘᶜᵏᵉʳˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this episode, things carry over to Japan where Donatello takes a journey to somewhere special and ends up seeing an old friend.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸⱽ

ᴸᵒᵛᵉ ᴵˢ Fᵒʳ Sᵘᶜᵏᵉʳˢ

**[ Donatello ]**

The place where I wanna be is right in front of me. The fruity wind, the cherry blossoms, and the cultural structure of every single building that I pass or see from the view. It never got old from the moment I saw it until I left that one unfaithful day. 

But now, now, I had bigger problems, "Hi, Sensei," I greeted my father's grave with a warm smile and a hand full of flowers that I thought were perfect for him. Yellow seemed to fit him in any situation and this was a situation where it did, "It's been a long time and I would have come sooner, but, life has really grabbed me by the tail and I don't know how to get unstuck," 

I slowly lower myself down onto my knees, making sure to spread out the ends of my kimono and I carefully place the flowers in front of the grave, trying to keep the sad smile on my face. It was a rather fake one, but I couldn't just come here with real happiness. 

"I can't speak for my brothers," I glanced down, putting my hands in my lap, "They should be here, I know. And I also know that whatever has brought me to this state of emotions will only confuse and cloud my vision for whatever else life has to throw at me. You'd probably say that, wouldn't you?" I questioned the stone, knowing it won't answer me back, but it felt nice, "I wish you were here so you can meet your _grand_ _turtle._ I'm naming her after the ancient chi master you taught me so much about. The books you gave me, those really old ones. I couldn't pass up the opportunity with Mei Pieh Chi and she'll forever be known as our little Venus," I said, placing my hand on top of the stone, rubbing my fingers flatly down the engravings, "Because of you, Dad"

"You have a way with words, Donatello," a familiar voice spoke and when I turned around and saw the face who matched the pictures in my head, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. 

"Usagi?" the smile on my face was real this time when I saw my rabbit friend and by then, I couldn't stop myself from running forward and wrapping my arms around him, "I can't believe-- God, I can't believe you're here!" I sniffled, not realizing that I was actually crying. 

"It's been a long time, my tall friend," he smiles up at me and hugs back as equally tight. 

"When did you get in?" I pull back, collecting myself and wiping my eyes underneath the frames of my glasses, "I mean, like, have you been here this whole time?"

"Sort of, and sort of not," he admits with clear happiness and I gave him a curiously questioning look, "I'm here on my honeymoon,"

"Honeymoon-- wait, you got married?" I tilt my head, "To who?" 

Usagi's face lights up at the question, "Gen,"

My eyes widen, "Holy crap! You and Gennosuke? I didn't think Murakami was even-- well, you know, like that!" 

"I had thought the same thing--" he speaks softly while lowering his ears, "But things do change, Donatello and this definitely was one of the things that changed for the better,"

"I wish I could say the same," I frown. 

"I just wanna say that I am sorry about Sensei Splinter," he mimics my frown and I felt him squeeze my hand, "I wish I could have been there, but things-- things have truly been all over the place with the wedding and of course, old faces and new enemies,"

"It's fine, really-- we were already kind of broken before our Sensei passed," I admit, looking over at the gravestone again. 

"It has been no secret in the temple when Gyoji caught your two brothers necking in the garden," Usagi smirks at me. 

"It has also been no secret that he threw my brothers out afterward," 

"I heard that too, but after The Ancient One found out about it, he set new rules in the grand temple for those who have opinions on same-sex relations. The Ancient One judges no one," my friend smiles again and on his back, I see the familiar wakizashi Usagi always carried with him. It would be a little odd if I didn't see him with it or any weapon for that matter. 

"So, besides the wedding-- what else has happened while we've been apart?" I press him as we begin to take a walk down through a pathway that leads us back to the temple where I'm currently staying.

My friend and I spend the next two hours talking little by little about everything that has happened in the last few years, including my brothers and me, my sexuality that he relates to and knew right from the beginning and all the death, the trauma, and most importantly, Venus. 

"Is that her?" he asks when he sees the egg inside of the incubation dome and I nod my head, delicately running my finger over the glass frame, "It's beautiful, Donatello,"

"Will you be here when she comes?" I can't help but wonder because now that I know he's here and he's happy-- I want him to be with me in case anything goes south with my brothers. 

"I will be if you want me to be," he gives me a final smile and after another hour, Usagi and I share a bottle of saki and he travels back home to his own temple where he and his mate are currently honeymooning at. 

Once alone, I tinkered with a few things in the new lab I put together and when I was fiddling around with a security panel I planned to install, I noticed something within the incubation dome change. I dropped everything in my hands and my tools tumbled out of my lap with how fast I stood up. Inside the dom and beneath the flickering light, I saw the egg wiggle and move. My eyes felt like they were going to pop out of their sockets from what I was seeing and on the very top of the shell, the egg cracked about three inches. 

I practically leaped into the air at the sight in front of me and in my pocket, I went to grab for my phone and when I tried calling Mikey, something flashed on my screen. It was a calendar reminder that today marked Leo's birthday and my heart sunk into my stomach. I tried calling Mikey three more times after that and got no answer. It wasn't late in America, nor was it early, so he couldn't be asleep.

I looked back at the egg and so far, it hasn't cracked an inch further, so that meant this was going to take a day or two longer, luckily. I took this opportunity to run into the kitchen and grab a bowl of water because I'm gonna need it when my little amphibian arrives. 

I turned the knob on the sink and the water started pouring out of the faucet and into the large wooden bowl and once it was full, I wiped my hands dry with a dishtowel. I turned to go back into the lab when the sound of a door closing caught me by surprise. I gripped the edges of the bowl tightly until I decided to put it down and wander back into the living area. The moonlight was pouring in through the wide windows and the sliding doors that went out to the backyard pool were nearly open. 

I look around, waiting and listening for any sudden movements and in my pocket, I reach and find my bo and pull it out. Still listening to my surroundings I press the automatic button on the handle of my weapon and my bo stretches out to its full length and sparks with energy. I grip it tight and prepare myself for any more _surprises._

"Don," I jump, swinging my bo all the way around and the end gets caught by a much thicker hand and I release a large breath of relief when I see my brother Raphael. 

"W-What?" I muttered, "What're you doing here?" 

Seeing him again after a week was more of a fresh breath of air, but he didn't look happy. Which wasn't new, but it also wasn't good, "I'm not the only one who's here," he adds with a creeping frown and I slowly turn around to follow his eyes and I see Leo right before me and my knees nearly buckled right out from beneath me. 

I didn't know whether I should run at him, or be angry at this point, but either way, I couldn't stop myself from doing what my heart wanted. I threw my arms around his neck and with a weak attempt, he hugs me back, barely touching my carapace, "I'm glad to see you too," he manages to cough out and I quickly pull myself away from him to get a good look at his face. 

He looked pale, a greenish pale and the darker circles forming underneath his deep eyes filled me with complete concern, "What's wrong with you, are you sick?" I touched his cheeks and his forehead, while brushing my fingers down the bridge of his snout and it felt dry, without moisture. 

"Yeah, he's really sick, D," Mikey spoke, making me snap my head in his direction and when our eyes met, I saw the tears streaming down his cheeks and I figured that maybe he was crying because of how long it's been since we have seen each other or it's because of what the heck was going on. 

My little brother came forward and hugged at my chest, sobbing against me, "Can you tell me what's going on?" I ask Raph who lowered his head with crossed arms. 

"I'm sure Cade and his brother will be more than happy to tell ya," he spits, sounding unbearably bitter and I nod my head, shaking with every sob that came from Mikey's mouth. 

In through the front door and into the light, my friend and a stranger walked in, holding a bag in each hand. The red-eyed one looked right at me, "You must be, Donatello," he greets with a thick accent.

"I am, and you are?"

"Aiden," he grins momentarily until Cade clears his throat, "Aiden Murdock," 

He was as equally inked up and pierced as Cayden but I didn't get a good look at him, nor did I care, "I'm waiting on an explanation here," I point out at the two. 

"Donnie, while the brothers get settled in, can we speak together, privately?" Cade politely but sternly asks me and I agree with silence and before I exit the room, I give the top of Mikey's head a quick kiss and I release him. 

Cayden and his brother follow me into the lab where I checked on the egg again and still, I saw no progress being made and for a moment, I collect myself with a quick inhale and exhale, "So, are we gonna talk or what? Because this unexpected visit has truly made me one big mess and I'd like to check on Leo,"

"That's what we wanna talk to you about," Cade clarifies with me while telling Aiden to put the bag down and open it. Inside, after unzipping it, Aiden pulls out a few tubes of what looks like blood and in the others, it's something else and I recognized the glass slides. 

"I don't know if you were told or not, but Leo was injected with a parasite," Aiden puts it on smooth and Cade grabs the slides from him. 

"What're you talking about?"

"The serum," Cade sighs with irritation, "My brother here is trying to say-- the serum is more of a parasite than a mutational disease," I watch in silence as he holds up the tube of blood that was labeled with an L on it, "This is your brother's blood, and if Aiden here without being a dipshit will demonstrate for me, I can show you exactly what's going on,"

Aiden rolls his eyes at his brother and pulls out the familiar green syringe from the duffel bag and with a quick drop of the ooze into Leo's blood, I watch with a bolt of curiosity as the serum devours every last inch within the glass vile. I come forward, snatching the vile from his hands, "But this would mean-- that would--" I stammer, unable to come up with the words, the answers swarming in my head. 

"We've already discussed this with the others, but, Donnie, this serum, whatever it is, whoever made it and wherever it's from, it's killing Leo, and we won't be able to save him," Cade confesses with sadness laced in his voice. 

"N-No, that can't be possible, h-have you tested it with your own blood? O-Our blood isn't the same as yours, as humans!" I try but he sighs and nods his head. 

"We've even tested it on Lillian," 

"We have very little time until we can figure out what to do," Aiden admits, looking right at me as I feel the back of my neck already getting hot with sweat, "I suggest you spend as much time with your brother as you can before it is too late," 

"We can either try and save him while he's still alive, or, we can use the mutated blood in Raph or Mikey's veins to keep him going for a little while longer, but, it won't last, Donnie," Cade says, trying to get me to look at him, but I can't seem to rip my eyes away from the vile. 

"When you say you're going to try and save him while he's alive, that means, change him, right?" I question quietly but keep my cool tone at a low. 

"Yes," Cade answers, "But, we're still risking his life even then because, whatever this stuff is, it doesn't mix well with our venom, with your brothers' venom and if our venom _can't_ save him, then, there's nothing more we can do,"

I grip the glass vile in my hand and I curse silently at myself for not being there sooner, for leaving and being so selfishly involved with my own issues and what Leo did with Karai. I would never be able to forgive myself if Leo dies because of this, because of her, because of me. 

"H-He can't die!" I sob, clutching my hand at my chest and squeezing it tight, "Leo can't die, he can't!" 

Cade looks at Aiden miserably and attempts to pull me up from the ground, "Listen to me, we will keep trying-- I promise you. I give you my word to, whatever happens, I will be there and I will be at fault for it, but for now, you need to go be with him," Cade tries, gripping my arms to lift me up, "Please, Donatello," he begs. 

I don't remember leaving but when I found myself at the bedroom door where everything started, my hands and feet were moving on their own. I twisted the knob, taking every step as slow as possible, and inside, everything was still pretty much the same as we left it. 

I looked around the room taking in the cream-colored walls and dragging the tips of my fingers across the soft bedding covering the mattress and at the foot of the bed I stopped moving and frowned at the memory. It was a good memory and far too amazing to forget but it hurt more than I should let it. 

"Leo," I called, knowing he was fresh out of the shower. 

"Yeah?" he answered, exiting the bathroom but holding onto the doorframe for support and I hesitate to look at him as he walks in and sits down on the bed, "Everything alright?"

His skin was still damp from the water and the towel hooked around his hips seemed like a good distraction for me right now, but for more of a, I'd-rather-avoid-looking-at-your-face-distraction.

I nervously fiddled with my own fingers, "I'm not so sure anymore,"

"They told you huh?" he asks, tilting his head off to the side and I finally gain the courage to meet his eyes and I immediately flushed at the contact. I missed him more than I'd like to admit and the news I've just learned only makes me miss him more, even though he's here, he's right in front of me, "I'm fine, Donnie,"

"You're not," I interrupt, squeezing my fingers and looking down again, "You're getting worse,"

"But it's okay," he sighs, "Whatever happens," Leo takes my hand, "I'll be okay with it,"

"No!" I pull away and his lips turn down into a tight flat line, "You may be okay with this, but I'm not! And I can speak for all of us! Raph definitely isn't okay-- Mikey is crushed and me, what the heck am I meant to feel? I don't even know, but I do know that I don't wanna lose you because if I do, there's nothing!" 

"Don--"

"No, Leo!" I shout, "I will tell the others to go ahead with the change, there's no other way!"

"We don't know if that'll work or not," he sighs again.

"I don't care," 

"Don't be stupid, Donatello!" he yells at me, standing up, "The others told me and you that there is a big chance I won't survive the change! And no matter what they do, I'll be suffering either damn way-- and this is my mistake, it's my fault that I'm sick and it's just something I have to live with and it's something you've gotta get over,"

I shake my head, rubbing the palm of my hand flatly over my face, "The day I left, Mikey called me," I confessed with a weak laugh, "He was devastated, he was hurting and crying to me to come back. But I didn't. I couldn't because I was so mad at you for doing what you did," I look right at Leo as I'm speaking and his icy blue eyes stir with emotion, "He told me we couldn't be apart. He said that weren't the same without each other and during that phone call, I didn't wanna believe him. The only thing I wanted was to be alone, to be away for my own selfish reasons and you," I point out clenching my fists, "You wanna tell me that you'll be okay with leaving? With dying and leaving me! Leaving us to fend for ourselves!" 

"Donnie, please," he begs, tears clear in his eyes, mimicking my own. 

_"We can't be apart,"_ I tell him,"You can't leave me because nothing-- nothing will ever be the same again!"

Leo reaches his hand out, touching my cheek and I nearly break down from the touch, "We won't," he lies and I throw myself into his arms and begin to sob. His arms wrapped around my shell and pulled me into a hug that I melted in.

For the rest of that night, we had no interruptions. We stayed up, talking and cuddling like a real couple. I told him about the progress of Venus and he was equally as happy and then I mentioned Usagi which left him a little speechless. Besides that, I felt like nothing could touch us right now and I was glad of that. 

When Leo closed his eyes and finally fell asleep, I was touching all my favorite bits of him and kissing them. I didn't want this night to end, but happiness, it doesn't last forever even while you're happy and that's the bit everyone hated. That's the bit that I now understood.

_Love really was for suckers._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	47. ᴴᵉᵃᵛᵉⁿ ᴰᵉˢᶜᵉⁿᵈˢ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this episode, it's Leo's birthday. Donnie fixes breakfast and he and Raph discuss with Leo what he wants to do for his special day and when he makes his decision, memories are brought back. Raph and Mikey spar off, and a special appearance comes into play of one they lost and loved dearly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, Moon Children. (I've made my decision, that is what I will call you from now on!)
> 
> I enjoyed writing this one so much, especially the dojo scene, ugh! 
> 
> I hope this one brings some tears, some laughs, and maybe a little fright so buckle up buttercups!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸⱽᴵ

ᴴᵉᵃᵛᵉⁿ ᴰᵉˢᶜᵉⁿᵈˢ

**[ Leonardo ]**

Japan, here we are again. 

This place was the beginning of my life even if it started somewhere else a long time ago and looking at the view now as the sun creeps over the mountains, I couldn't believe I was actually here. It reminded me of so much. So much I'd rather forget and others, not.

Taking the hilt of my blade, I use it to slowly stand and turn back towards the temple and in the doorway by the pool, I caught Raph watching me and for only a moment we shared a look that didn't last long until he lowered his head and disappeared inside. 

I didn't understand him anymore and frankly, I didn't care to at this point. I didn't have the strength for another fight and for my final days here on this earth, I'd like to spend it without negativity. However, the thoughts pulling at the back of my mind to cater to him bugged me. Since he became the monster I'd rather not be, he didn't sleep and when he ate, he did it when we weren't around and for that, I understood why nor did I wanna find out how he ate his food or putting it better, _drank._

He's become as bitter as Mikey and as emotional as Don and that was a side of Raph I rarely ever saw, that I thought I'd never see and a part of me loved it and then another hated it because we fought more than we did as kids. Everything ended with a fight or some emotional baggage I had to carry for him. He hated emotions, he hated feeling something and he hated loving someone and since we were young he had always been bad at showing it, but I'd never tell him that because he already knew it. He knew the truth and that's why he always ran from it. 

When I walked in through the sliding doors, Raph greeted me yet again with one of his stare downs but then he said something that totally threw me off, "Happy birthday," 

I stop, glancing over at him, "Birthday?" 

"Have you forgotten?" Donnie asked with worry as he exits the kitchen, holding a glass of orange juice and I eyed him, "Today is the eighteenth, Leo," he frowns. 

"So it is," I agreed, completely forgetting about today being _that_ day because it was just another day in my opinion. It was a day that I thought was made for people who celebrated the joy of aging up or earning the luck of that day being all about them, but for me, I didn't want that. I wanted to be treated like it was any normal day but living in a family where one specific brother had to have birthdays like all the other human-like-birthdays, made it quite difficult to just forget. 

"Yeah, so, I'd act like you remembered before Mikey wakes up," Donnie says, "Plus, I made some breakfast and you're gonna eat it," he turns to go back in the kitchen and for only a second, I shared another look with Raph and he nods. 

"You need ta eat," 

I don't say another word until I'm sitting at the dining table shoveling scrambled eggs into my mouth, "Raph, do you think Mikey will be eating?" Donnie questions our brother and in my head, I see things I'd rather avoid. I didn't think Mikey would be eating this type of food ever again to begin with. 

"Probably not," Raph says, sitting in the chair across from me, "If I'm not, he won't be,"

"You have a new diet," I comment and he glares over at me as Donnie sits down as well. 

"He used to eat more food than all of us combined in a week. It's odd seeing him so, tamed?" Donnie scratches his head to think of the right words to say and I could agree with him. 

"He hasn't mentioned anything about his new diet," Raph says in quotations on the word diet, "I could vouch for it, considerin' he hunts when I do,"

"Hunt?" I tilt my head, "You guys don't actually kill people right?"

"Course not," Raph rolls his eyes, holstering his sai, "We kill animals,"

I nearly choke, "What?" 

Right as Donnie is about to take a bite of bacon he stops, "Like, for their blood?"

"Yeah, that's how Cade does it," Raph explains, "We go in the woods and hunt, just uh, without the fuckin' guns n' shit,"

I put my fork down and cough a bit, "Wait, so, the blood I've been drinking isn't animal, right?"

"No, it's mine and Mikeys,"

"That doesn't really help," I push my plate away.

"You're going to eat more than that," Donnie scolds and I sigh, "Leo,"

"I'm not really that hungry," 

"You have to keep your strength up," he argues, taking an actual bite of his own food. 

"I don't see how ya eat that crud anyways," Raph waves his hand around the table in disgust. The smell of the food alone was actually pretty nice until you saw it up close. Donnie was an excellent cook, but since this serum was injected into my body, I haven't really been up for my usual four-course meals and I didn't think I would be for a while. 

"Well, if you don't wanna eat, then what do you wanna do?" Donnie asks after finishing up with his own plate and I glance down, "It being your birthday and all, we can do whatever you wanna do, okay?" he smiles at me, squeezing my hand underneath the table and I see Raph cringe at the both of us. 

"I'd like to go see dad today," I tell him and he nods with clear excitement, "But before we do, I wanna go into the dojo,"

"For what, Leo?" Raph questions with annoyance. 

"We haven't practiced in a while,"

"Leo, you are in no shape to be throwing down moves," Donnie says but I'm already standing up and walking out. 

"Get Mikey up. You have five minutes," I warn them and without another word, I leave, still balancing myself on the hilt of my blade. I didn't feel up for anything extreme, but I needed a warm-up. It had been a long time, and right now, I didn't feel like myself and I figured that this would help. 

Inside the dojo, I took the opportunity to undress properly and sharpen my weapons while I waited for my siblings to gather in. I took in the sight of my naked blades and breathed in at a relaxing pace as I slowly dragged the cleaning cloth down the sharp edges and watching the light from the outside glare off the Hamon. I did this with both blades and when I felt that they were clean enough, I readjusted the ito wraps and tightened up the ends where it didn't hang as low when swung through the air. 

As I lowered myself down onto my knees, I felt a little light-headed but I ignored the feeling for now and kept my focus on the small bit of meditation filling the room before Donnie entered the dojo, with Raph and Mike in behind him. 

"Happy, happy birthday, Leo!" Mikey sings as he skips into place and I smile at him. 

"Thank you," I lay out my weapons in front of me, "Did you bring them?"

"Bring uh, what-- oh! Right, yeah," Mikey nods dramatically while pointing both hands at the weapons on his hips, "Good, now, all of you, kneel," I command and my brothers obey with my words and shockingly Raph gives no fuss about it.

"What's the plan for this session, Sensei?" Donnie questions with a mischievous grin on his face.

Looking ahead, trying to focus less on his knowing smile and ignoring the fact that he called me Sensei and enjoyed it way too much, I stretch my legs and stand on my knees, "First, we will begin with the basics,"

"Leo, this is stupid, we already know how to do this crap," Raph complains as I knew he would.

I stand, bringing my blades with me as I move, "Fine since it's so stupid-- Mikey," I look at my younger brother and he manages a smile, "I want you to take Raph down,"

"What?" Raph scoffs. 

"This should be good," Donnie mouths off to himself and I give him a silent agreement of my own. 

"I want each of you at one end of the room," I say and they listen, and I walk over to Raph, carrying on, "Now, Mikey-- let's pretend Raph here isn't actually our brother right now," 

"Oh, how fun!" Mikey bounces on the tips of his toes and I couldn't help but laugh at his excitement because I too was wound up for this. 

Placing a hand on Raph's shoulder, I tilt my head thinking about something a little daring. "Let's pretend he's Toshiro," I say and the room falls quiet as expected. 

The look on Mikey's cheerful face changes and I slowly back away as Raph gives me a deep glare, but keeping his focus on our little brother, "Let's not," Raph disagrees. 

"This will help him," I say going back to my spot and kneeling again, "Now, sutansu!"

My brothers listened to my demand and got into position, keeping their legs apart and arms strongly locked with a vision for anything to be thrown at them. 

"Don't hold back," Mikey chirps in a deep tone to Raph, where our brother smirks in response.

"Not in my ages,"

"Tatakai!" I shout and it begins as I and Donnie observe from afar and from across the room, Mikey runs at Raph full sprint, taking him on and jumping into the air where his blow is avoided. His spins and twirls the long chain in his hand once he's landed after the dodge and Raph goes in for the kill, swinging his sai and buckling his legs at Mikey but being the wise turtle he is, that I knew he'd always be, he nails his opponent by throwing the end of his nunchuck, stretching the chain out and it clanks together when it wraps around Raph's legs and forces him to crash to the ground. He falls face-first into the dojo matt and Mikey jumps onto the back of his shell, keeping him from getting up. 

"In yo face, in yo face, gotcha Raphie!" Mikey cheers on, taking in the glory of his winnings as Raph on the floor growls in defeat, "I win!" Mikey sticks his tongue out just as Raph sees a potential opportunity of weakness and grabs Mikey by sliding his sai between the crease of his elbow and forearm, forcing him to flip forward and slam down onto the ground. In the other hand as Raph now sits on top of Mikey he holds his sai to our little brother's throat, panting. 

"I win," he says lowly and warningly as they share a long look before I decide to call it quits.

"That's enough for now," I tell them, "Back to your positions before you two start making out," 

"Not a chance," Raph remarks as he stands and returns to his spot next to Donnie, leaving a pouting Mikey still on the floor but eventually he gets up and returns to his own spot as well. 

"You both did good," I commend my brothers, "Especially you, Mikey with your technique. And Raph you saw the weak point in Mikey's move and you took charge and was able to take him down with no problem," 

"There are always weak points in the things Mike does," Raph accuses playfully but bitterly and Mikey silently mocks our brother with his hand. 

"Now, Donnie," I say with a smile as he slowly rises to his feet, bo in hand and fully prepared, as always, "Can you show me a supin?"

"Hai," he agrees, spinning his bo slowly at first then speeding it up, taking one step at a time to familiarize himself with what he's doing and practicing. 

"Supin and Panchi," I demand, and he obeys, spinning his weapon skillfully and thrusting the end forward, followed by a stiff punch and then another to the opposite side, using both arms and fists to boost his strength and stance, "Now you move quicker, spreading out your surroundings. Show me both moves with a haikikku,"

Donnie listens obediently and I loved watching him move after my every word, just like I loved watching Raph work out while he wasn't looking and Mikey being so observant and smart. Thinking this now, I realized it was me who was losing focus, and ahead of me, Donnie cleared his throat, out of breath. 

"Anything else I can do, Sensei?" he questions and I blink a few times. 

_Did he already do what I asked him to? Did I really just zone out that much?_

"Show me again," I ask, then add, "Please," 

Donnie nods at my plea, following the steps I gave him before but when he thrusts his bo forward again, he jumps into the air, leaving it with a sharp but high kick to his invisible opponent. I smile hugely at his finish and in return he flushes deep when I start to clap my hands, followed by Mikey who was eager to give our brother some credit because, with Donnie's brain and focus, he had the highest kick of us beat, leaving me in the dust with my own record. 

"Very good," I stand again, my blades in hand, "These are just simple practices but it gives me that one piece of home we can't get back in Manhattan,"

"It's actually pretty fun!" Mikey agrees with a bright smile, "I always enjoy kicking Raphs butt,"

"Just like I'll be kickin' yours later," the heated turtle in the room snapped and Mikey gets quiet again and on his face is an obvious red color. 

"As I was saying--" I glare at the both of them, "It reminds me of who we are, who we always will be and can be, who we can make Venus out to be,"

At that, Donnie gives me one of his biggest smiles and I share the happiness with him, "I can't wait," he agrees and I nod my head, gripping the hilts of my blades again. 

"Why don't you show us some moves, fearless leader?" Mikey says and I move into my own position, already planning what I wanna do and perform but when I walk into the middle of the room, I start feeling light-headed again and in front of me, I look to find my brothers, but they aren't there. I see someone else, someone I've known my whole life. 

"Dad?" 

"Leo," he says, sounding unlike himself, "You okay?" 

I dropped the blade in my left hand, rubbing my eyes, "You aren't real," I swing the weapon in my right and he backs away, looking exactly like the person I grieve so much for, "You aren't fucking real!"

"I-I think he's hallucinating" 

"Disarm him, we have to disarm him," the lookalike says with panic in his blisteringly fading voice and I take a step back husking out incoherent words, my vision getting really blurry and distorted. 

Suddenly the weapon in my right hand is taken from me and my knees fall forward, making my legs feel numb and I wanna cry out for my brothers, but they aren't here just this wannabe of my father and his illuminating eyes. Both mock me as I collapse weakly to the floor and call for anyone, anything to help me out of this nightmare but nothing comes, not even heaven. 

I felt hands on me, scratching and prodding at my body and touching my face, slapping me but I couldn't snap out of this, whatever _this_ was and when I finally give in and close my eyes, everything disappears. 

For a long time, I see nothing but black and smokey colors that reminded me of a foggy rainbow and then, I awake in a field. A field I knew. A field I was familiar with like so many other things. 

I stood up in a hurry, looking around and falling back down and when I dug my fingers into the green grass, I quickly noticed that my hands and the rest of my body were back to normal. My kind of normal and in front of me, across the field of flowers I saw him again, my father. 

"Why're you doing this to me?" I ask, keeping my voice low, and across from me, I watch as the rat smiles at me. 

"My son, I want you to rest now," he tells me and I stumble back trying to stand again.

"Y-You aren't real!" I actually shout this time and I watch as my father sighs and begins to walk forward to reach me and when he's close enough, I try to step away but he grabs my hand with a warm smile and I swallow a cry when I actually feel his skin on mine. 

"It's okay Leonardo," he promises me and I can't stop myself from throwing my arms around his smaller body and he welcomes my hug with one just as tight and at this point, I'm crying and I can't hold the tears back any longer. 

"I-It's really you!" 

"Yes, my son, please, calm yourself," he whispers to me and when I pull away to look at him again to make sure this is actually real for the final time, he caresses my face and I sob. 

"How are you even here?"

"I'm here for all of you, in spirit," he answers still touching me.

"Spirit?" I look around at the field, the sky, and notice how everything is a never-ending loop of beauty and destruction, "S-So, this isn't real?"

"It's as real as you want it to be, my son, so please, calm yourself. I want to talk to you about some important things," he gives me that familiar stern look that I've missed seeing every day and I nod my head, following his lead to kneel down in the grass, unable to take my eyes off of him, "I see that you've been making a lot of mistakes with your brothers here lately-- why?"

I sigh, unable to believe what I'm hearing or even seeing but hell, I guess I saw this coming and I needed it to because I never thought I'd see my father again, "I haven't been faithful to either of them like I should have been Sensei. I've been spiraling out of control because of the baby on the way. I've been so rebellious and careless since Donatello told me about his pregnancy and sometimes I wish it didn't happen because I feel like I'm not ready,"

My father eyes me for a moment before saying anything and then he takes my hands again, "Leonardo, let me ask you something--" he begins, sharing warm eye contact with me, "When you and your brothers were babies, do you think I asked for you?"

"Well," I started. 

"Did I ask or wish to become a father to four children all at once?" he then frowns, "Most importantly did I ask to become this?" Splinter motions to his body with a sharp claw, "No, my son, but I had to be ready no matter what. I had to learn whether I wanted to or not and with that and keeping my head held high and my heart open to learning new things, I fell deeply in love with the idea of being your father and now, I wouldn't change it or regret it for the world,"

"But-- why? We were such a pain to raise," I lower my head, but he forces me to look at him.

"Leonardo, all children can be complicated to raise, and yours will be too, so do not think it will be easy-- because it will not and I can't wait for you to experience all the joy and laughter she will bring to you, my son," he smiles up at me, "You must guard her with your life as I did you and the others. Don't ever let her go," 

"Sensei, why does this sound like a goodbye?" I ask on the verge of tears again. 

"Because, my son, they need you,"

"I need you!" I sob into his shoulder and his arms around me again, tightening and pulling me closer to his much smaller body, and the smell of him only made it worse. I didn't wanna go. I didn't wanna leave him. 

"Be strong-- be focused, never lose focus, and please, tell Michelangelo that I love him," my dad smiles at me one last time until I start feeling and watching him fade away. 

I fall forward, grabbing and gripping at the grass, "Sensei," I exhaled sharply, trying to crawl and run after him, "Dad!"

I yelled after him, reaching into the sky as his ashes vanish before me and then I start slipping away too. I watch as my fingers distort and separate right before my eyes and I shout for my father louder and louder but I get no answer from him not wanting to leave yet and eventually, the field disappears. The grass beneath me dies and wastes away like burning paper in the wind until a hole of darkness swallows me and I start falling, unable to make a sound. 

"Leo!" someone shouts, making me dizzy again and I feel the wind in my face the cooling numbness of the tips of my fingers and toes, "Leo, come on, wake up!"

My eyes flutter open and I start coughing really harshly and for a second, I thought I saw blood fly out of my mouth. I felt arms on either side of me, holding me down and I cough harder, gasping and struggling to breathe and above me, another pair of arms came down to put something over my face, and then I could breathe again. I felt the little tubes being stuck up my nose and I sucked in the fresh oxygen, coughing again. 

"He's alright, he's alright!" more voices came crashing down on top of me and I fluttered my eyes again, seeing a bright light above me and then came Donnie. He hovered over me, caressing my face. 

"You scared me," he said on a shaky breath, pressing our snouts together to nuzzle me and the only thing I could focus on was my own breathing as Donnie churred happily against me. 

"W-What happened?" I croaked, resting my head back on whatever I'm laying on and when I looked around again, I was no longer in the dojo but in a room, I've never seen before. 

To my left, I saw Raph's bothered stare and the words that came out of his mouth sent a shiver down my spine, like I didn't already know, "Ya died,"

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	48. Sʰᵉˡˡⁿᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leo wakes up and Mikey is soon able to remember why seeing Splinter was so special to him. Aiden and Mikey connect on a different level and Raph man's up and admits that he still loves and always will love his mate but instead of speaking it, he shows it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, it's here!
> 
> Ah, I firstly wanna apologize for taking weeks upon weeks to get this one out. If you saw my Author's Note/Update thing then you'd know what's been going on. 
> 
> Lots of depression and mind games but regardless chapter forty-seven is here and I really hope you enjoy it because I definitely did. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸⱽᴵᴵ

Sʰᵉˡˡⁿᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿ

**[ Michelangelo ]**

"I saw him," Leo said dryly before taking a sip of water and I looked at him with wonder, but knowing who he was talking about.

"Saw who, Leo?" Donnie asks, cleaning the blood off of our brother. 

"Sensei," I answered for him and from across the room Raph stopped what he was doing to turn and look at me, "I've seen him too,"

"What?" Donnie eyes me, "What do you mean you've seen him?"

"He means that we've seen dad, in spirit," Leo admits, "I saw him when I passed out again and-- he was asking me all these questions and--" my brother begins to weep right in front of me and I give out a deep frown, knowing exactly how he's feeling. I watch as Donnie hugs him and Raph hasn't stopped staring at me since the mention of our dad was brought up. 

_He's probably wondering why I never told anyone about seeing him, but I wanted to keep that to myself in case anyone didn't believe me or thought I was just dreaming._

"Leo, I know you're upset, but you really need to consider drinking more blood," Cade interrupts my thoughts and I blink at the mention of the substance as he holds out a metal canister in his hand and unscrewing the lid. 

"I don't want any more of that!" Leo shouts, sitting up from the table, but Donnie stops him. 

"Leo, it'll keep you alive," his mate tries to tell him while keeping a firm grip on his shoulder. 

"It isn't keeping me alive!" Leo coughs, inhaling on a strangled breath, "It's killing me faster you idiots!" 

"You need to calm down," Aiden warns him, "His blood pressure is rising and I'm not so sure that we will be able to stabilize him for the third time," he tells Cade, and my stomach tightens at the permanent thought of Leo not coming back the next and final time.

"You have to keep drinking Leo," Donnie assists, keeping our brother down on the table. I take a deep breath then come over to his side, taking his hand in mine and I focus my mind on the single energy pinpointing to his heart and brain and when I touch Leo, he grips my hand tightly enough to show me that what I'm doing is working and as I listen to his heart thudding away in his chest, I can feel every nerve in his arm coming alive.

"Mikey-- the hell are ya doing?" Raph asks me, but I don't pay any attention to him. 

"He's helping him by the looks of it," Cade assumes, checking the monitor attached to my brother by needle, "He's stabilizing him,"

"How?" Donnie shakes his head, watching me then Leo then back to me again.

Leo looks up at me and I immediately am able to see what he saw. I could smell the rich but musky scent coming from our Sensei, and how his arms felt around my brother. I could feel the pure, raw emotion coming from him, and when I stared into my brother's eyes, I felt tears streaming down my face and I let go and had to leave the room. 

I could hear someone following me and in my head, I hoped it was Raph coming after me to see what's wrong but when I heard the sound of my name being called, my chest swelled up. I slowly turned and saw Aiden standing there and I clenched my fists at my sides, automatically being hurt that he wasn't the person I wanted it to be. 

"What happened in there?" he asks me and I look away tilting my head. 

"Too much," I answered him truthfully but unknowing of how to explain what I felt when I touched Leo, "I don't know,"

Aiden follows me out by the pool, keeping his distance, "Well, I know how it feels to be confused and maybe a little hurt, so-- you can at least try to tell me," he says making his accent seem sharper than usual and he smiles at me.

"You wouldn't understand," I tell him before looking at the pool, letting the small waves of water relax me.

"Try me," he challenges and I come to a near smile myself when he gives me the dare. 

"I miss my father, I miss my brothers and what we had months ago," I admit beginning to mutter off about the subject, "I've never been able to talk about it with someone else and when my Sensei was alive he didn't exactly agree to what we were to one another and when he did, it was too late," I look down at the water again, sitting down and sticking my feet in. 

"Can I ask a silly question?" he asks, taking a minute to answer but when he speaks I could feel his voice growing closer and I knew that he was only inches from me now. 

"Silly is an understatement with me, dude," I joke, "But sure,"

I hear him inhale on his last breath, "How did you and your brothers come to, you know?" 

"You mean how did I?" I laugh at him, "I don't know really-- I just know that I didn't know that I felt that way till Raph kissed me the first time and with Don and Leo, I don't exactly know how those two fell for one another. We all love each other but I feel like they had a much more complicated coming-out party than I and Raph did," I smile at the memories. 

"I figured it'd be you making the moves in that relationship," I hear Aiden mumble, him knowing I'd hear his comment and then I turn my head to look up at him, his bright red eyes and hair being the first two things I notice about him and then how his skin is so pale it sparkles. 

"You weren't the only one," I then giggle, standing up, "I don't think my life has changed any faster than that day. I discovered what too much was and then I died, came back as this" I motion towards my body, "And now I can see into the eyes of others and their spirits,"

"You can also control the emotions of others," he points out and I look down at his ripped jeans, trying to distract myself from the obvious. 

"Yeah, maybe I can,"

"You can!" Aiden argues, stepping closer, "Because I can," he says grabbing my wrist, "But it doesn't work on other bloodsuckers like ourselves,"

Looking at his hand on me, he lets go when he notices that what he's trying to do isn't working and backs away as if he overstepped his boundaries, "So, there are others like us?"

Aiden then smiles at me, "Yes, wait until you meet our cousin Troy. He's uh, he's got special abilities,"

"How special?" 

"Not as special as the Chi shit that Cayden tried to explain to me. I mean, we're vampires, but the stuff you guys can do is serious magic," Aiden nods at me and I smile to myself knowing that we are more special, but regardless vampires are pretty cool too. 

I bite my lip, seeing his eyes again, "Can I ask you a question now?"

"Depends," he answers, stroking his chin like he's thinking real hard about this and then he laughs, "Of course, shoot, dude,"

"Your eyes, they are red," I say not looking away and Aiden blinks at the overwhelming amount of pressure I'm probably putting on him, "Cade hasn't really explained much about how our eyes work and I see his and my brother's change from time to time," 

"There's not really much to explain, and he doesn't talk about mine a lot," 

"Why?" 

Causing him to blink again, "Well, when someone like us," he motions towards us both, "Has red around the eye, it means we drink more than what we're supposed to,"

"I don't drink often, but Raph does it more," I shrug looking away at the thought of him, "His diet is probably a lot worse than mine now,"

"I'm sure Cade has gotten the both of you used to an animal diet,"

"Isn't that what you do?"

"No," he says a little too quiet, "Cade tried to get me to follow those rules but not every one of our kind can be so keen to following rules of their master,"

"Master?"

Aiden laughs at my curiosity and I can already feel myself becoming flushed with embarrassment, "Well, Cade likes to call himself our creator and not master, but I say master because it sounds more, eh, I don't know, dirty?" 

The color on my cheeks deepen and I start laughing with him, "I like the sound of a master, which would mean Raph is mine,"

"Did Cade not create you?" 

"That sounds so weird," I laugh again, "But no, when I died, it was Raph who had to do all the work in that department. It was said by Cade that with his blood and Raph's venom, that was their only shot at bringing me back,"

Aiden looks at me with a look of mysteries, like he's brainstorming without saying too much but making it obvious enough to know that something serious was just triggered inside of him, "I'll be back if you wanna chat again, don't hesitate to let me know, Mike," he winks at me, and I tilt my head and watch as he walks away and meets Raph in the doorway ignoring his presence. My brother gives the guy and cut-throat-glare and shuts the door when he comes out on clenched fists. 

_Oh, god. What now._

I drop my stare and turn back towards the pool, watching the sun that is now sitting just above the horizon and from behind, I could hear my brother's rather large footsteps coming straight for me, "Before you say anything-- I'm not talking about this," I warn him off with the wave of my hand. 

I hear him scoff, "When did you plan on tellin' me about dad? What about your fuckin' ability to control emotions?"

I look at him, anger running cold in my veins, "Were you eavesdropping?" 

"Yeah, I was! So what, I wanted to know why the fuck that kid ran after you,"

"Probably because you didn't!" I shove him in the shoulder and he glares at me. 

"I was going to, Mikey-- but Leo he's sick!" 

"He's fine!" I shout, then realizing what I said, "For now,"

"You're being selfish again," Raph sighs.

"Fuck you," I curse at him, wanting to get away from my brother I turn to leave but he grabs me by the arm and I look right up at him, "Do we have to do this again?" 

"You keep running from me we won't ever be able to fuckin' solve this issue that's been goin' on between us!" he spits, keeping his grip on my arm firm. 

"What's there to solve, Raphael? What issues?" I pause, "Oh, I know! The one where you've totally lost interest in me!"

He looks at me with confusion and the anger in his eyes swirl around at my words, "The fuck are you talkin' about?"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, so do not give me--" 

I'm cut off by his lips on mine and for a second, I don't realize what is happening until I'm practically melting into the kiss. I wanted to be mad at him, be furious, or maybe not speak with him for a while and maybe he was right. Maybe I _have_ been selfish this whole time, it just makes me so mad when someone says that. I wanted to punch my brother for even interrupting me, but he was touching me and that was a start. 

Not expecting it, I felt his hands move to my hips and I whine when his fingers dig into my skin, "You think I've lost interest in you?" he asks, inches from my lips when I pull away to look up at him, "Do ya think I don't want you anymore?" 

I look away and swallow my pride, "I-I just figured you didn't find me attractive anymore," 

"Oh, Mikey," he chuckles, and I'm a bit in shock, "You're so naive sometimes, ya know that?"

_Did he really just laugh at me?_

Before I can say anything else, his lips are back on mine and with shaky hands, I press the palms of my hands against his chest, feeling the deep, hard, scars that are etched into his plastron. I take in every inch of him and drink up all the attention as much as possible because who knows when this will happen again. Moving my hand up, I rest it on the back of his neck, pulling his mouth even tighter against mine. A deep growl erupts from his throat, but I don't allow him to let go of me just yet.

I wanted him, I wanted him to say he wanted me, like the first time we ever kissed. Ever since I explained it to Aiden, I for some reason couldn't get it off my mind, and luckily I could feel it again. Our lips moved against one another in perfect rhythm and at this point, I was ready to go. I needed him now and I was going to get my way whether he liked it or not. 

"Raph," I breathed, collecting the spit from my lips with my tongue and when I look around at our surroundings I nearly forget where we are and that we basically just made out in the opening where anyone could have caught us. Like Aiden. God, that would have been embarrassing.

"Say it, Mikey," he whispers to me, my eyes glazing over as I look up at him with such lust and desire. I could feel the adrenaline in my veins spiking and I gripped his hand in mine. 

"Want you," I bashfully said, "But not here, somewhere else,"

"Why not? We live here," he wonders bluntly.

"I-I know, but, I just wanna be away from this for a bit," I swallow again, rubbing my thumb over my brother's knuckles nervously and I look back up at him, "I want you all to myself, no crime against that, Raphie," 

"Fine, we'll get away from here, but where?" he questions already pulling me away from the back yard and down the small pathway that led deep into the forest. 

"I don't care where we do it, the woods? Doesn't matter," I giggle, being all excited and giddy to finally get some alone time with my mate. 

"You're just eager," he rolls his eyes with a scoff, gripping my hand in his as we continue to walk, stretching about a mile before we finally stop and when I look around, the path had ended ages ago and everything around us were just green patches of low and high grass with tall trees and vines wrapping around the trunks and dark bark. The tropical flowers peeking out from the little nooks of nature keep catching my eye when I turn around, my fingers still linked with my brothers.

"I've never really noticed how beautiful this place is until now," I muttered in pure awe, listening to the distant noises of birds and other animals I can't quite describe. 

"It is, huh?" Raph agrees, hovering over me and pressing his lips to the back of my neck, trailing down the curve of my shell and I felt the spark of electricity that went down my spine set me off. 

I reached around and grabbed my brother by the arm and practically threw him on the ground with a minor growl of my own. I immediately climbed into his lap, clawing at his chest when our lips connected again. His big hands were rough but smooth to the touch as he ran his fingers up my thighs to pinch my tail that was already out, wiggling with need. 

I churred into the mouth of my lover feeling the tip of my tail being squeezed and stroked. I ground my hips forward and back, earning the sensual low groans that I craved from him. I shoved at his chest and he lied back, causing my head to spin from how fast we were moving but I couldn't stop and my strength mixed with his was overbearingly impossible to avoid, but so good at the same time.

I felt his fingers digging at my clothing but mostly paying attention to my pants, I heard the sound of a rip and then I was naked and he was too. We were in the middle of nowhere basically and the daring taste behind his lips was the only thing fueling me to not care who hears or sees, though I cared for the respect of my other siblings, including the new friends we've made. 

I stuck my ass out, moaning at the sensitive pressure being put on my tail, all while receiving an approving alpha-like growl from my mate which only made me want him more. I felt a burning sensation somewhere inside of my body that is needing to be filled and I knew then that I was done with the foreplay. At least for now. 

"R-Raph, no more teasing--" I gasp, feeling the rough fingers pinch the tip of my tail again and I writhed my hips against him, "P-Please!"

Looking down at my mate as I sat in his lap, the only thing he could do was grin up at me and say absolutely nothing before kissing me. Our tongues touched, sending another electric shock down my spine and creating impossible images in my head, and between my legs, my erection was growing hard and impatient with this game that I should have expected.

_Fuck me already._

"Stop bein' so eager or I won't," he laughs into my mouth and I whine, knowing damn well he'd be able to hear my thoughts, "I'm tryin' to make this last," 

"When since do you care about making it last?" I blink, flushed, and irritated while digging my fingers into the painted scales of my brother's shoulders. 

"Since now," he growls, lifting me up against his chest and bending his knees in such a way that I knew what was coming next and it was exactly what I've been wanting this whole time. I was so spoiled and sometimes I really freakin' hated it, but while I was with him, I didn't think I cared. I wanted eyes for him and him only.

"Just please," I begged again, hooking my arms around Raph's neck and grounding my hips against his body and groaning at the raw friction being created between my cock and my mate's plastron. 

Between my legs, I moved my hips again, feeling the desperation behind my movements but feeling so bad and also not wanting to care. Thinking this, I realized I had way too many built-up emotions, and this was going to easily allow me to let go of them. But I then decided to take matters into my own hands and say screw it. 

I pushed the palms of my hands against Raph's chest, earning a lingering glare from him as I forced him to lie back again. I kept one hand on him in case he wanted to sit up which wasn't happening again, and the other wandered down between my spread but trembling thighs, and I didn't see it, but I was nervous for some reason. Being this close to him again didn't feel the same, but it did? Why was it all so confusing? He felt different but the same. I felt different but the same. I didn't wanna think about how different everything not including us felt, but I couldn't help but notice the change. 

When the tip of my mate's member found my opening I was stuck in a silent moan for over a minute, feeling him stretch me out to a full after every disappearing inch. I breathed out a shaky whine, finally letting him go and allowing his cock to guide freely inside of me. I felt the power in my veins already rising and my strength locking into place. By now, being on top I would have felt tired already and maybe even my knees would have given out but now, as I said, things were different and I don't think I could ever stop or get tired. 

"Christ, Mikey," I heard my brother say before I began to move my hips instinctively and sensually. My own undead heart was hammering away in my chest when Raph grabbed my sides, pulling me down on his length, "Fuck, missed ya so much," 

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying not to bust so quickly but I felt it. This wasn't going to last long-- but I knew we could go again, and again without fear of fatigue or needing to recharge like a pack of batteries. I moved faster, biting my lip and focusing on the way I thrust and rotated my hips, earning another low growl from my mate I went quicker, harder and I churred, and loudly too. 

"R-Raph!" I whimpered, keeping myself as steady as possible with my hands resting on my brother's chest, "I-I can't, ah!"

On my ass, I felt him spank me and I whined out with a cry feeling the sharp thrusts of my brother taking control. His large hands dug into the fleshy muscle of my hips and fucked up into me with a growing rough pace. When I opened my eyes to look down at him, his own face was just as twisted with lust and pleasure as mine should look. His eyes were spot on looking back up at me and when he bit his lip and pinched my tail again, I churred the loudest I think I ever have. 

"That's it, Mikey" he panted, not removing his eyes from mine, "I know ya wanna finish, so cum for me, I'm right behind ya," 

I managed to laugh at his words, "S-Shut up!" I said, swatting his chest playfully, and shortly after, Raph wrapped an arm around my waist and flipped us over, and instantly he was thrusting into my body at lightning speed. I tried to keep my grip on his shoulders, but my mind wasn't allowing me to be in control of myself anymore. I felt that special bubbling in my lower abdomen and the sparks of electricity again, "R-Raphael, w-wait!"

"Cum!" he demanded, "You're an eager little bitch, Mikey! Don't play and change on me like this just because you don't wanna stop!"

"But I-" Raph hovered over me, fingers buried in the dirt on each side of my head as he thrust into me, earning cry after cry from my lips. The look in his eyes was evil, but a delicious type of evil and I wanted to give him whatever the fuck he wanted. My hand was practically dragging down my body until I found my cock, stroking it, and focusing on the thrusts that weren't my own, "O-Oh god!" I churred, throwing my head back while biting my lower lip so hard it would probably split into. 

"Good boy, fuck, cum for me!" he praised me while I felt his lips nipping and sucking at my throat, and my other hand gathered on the back of his neck, keeping him there, not wanting him to stop touching me as I reached the point of no return. I came between us, thumbing the slit of my cock and literally being able to taste my own cum on my tongue from how high I busted. 

"R-Raphael!" I churred, feeling his hot breaths of air on my throat as he too was close. Too close. I kept my legs spread out, reaching both hands around his larger frame and grabbing at his behind, automatically being able to feel the impossibly strong energy surging through his body as he reached his end. 

I could feel the warm, wet, heat coating my body from the inside, and finally, I was fully satisfied. I then curled up into my mate's arms and hugged him with an unforgiving grip, never wanting this moment to end but knowing it will because we will have to go back eventually and deal with the stress of our brother being sick or maybe never being okay ever again. 

"You're awfully quiet," he mutters above me, tracing the pattern on the back of my shell. 

"Sorry-" I picked my head up from his chest, resting my chin there, "Just thinking"

"About what, you're never like this, especially after-- _that,_ " he laughs for only a second and I smile at his glowing face that I rarely have seen in the past few months. 

"About how you were right. I didn't wanna stop," I point out, looking off at some random tree, "I don't think I'd ever want to stop being this close to you with no distractions,"

Raph's face then shows concern and I frown at him, "Mike, I know we haven't had the time to be together, but from now on, I'll try my hardest to show I love ya a lot more," 

"But?" I cock my head to the side, knowing there is more. 

"But what? There is no fuckin' but," he denies. 

"Raphie, there's always a but, now what's the catch?" I grin, leaning up to his face. 

He tries to avoid my stare, "Stay away from that redhead,"

I pull my brows together in confusion, "Why?"

"Because he likes ya, that's why"

I giggle, "No he doesn't!" 

"Bullshit!" he accuses and I stop laughing and glare at him. 

"If that's the case then Lillian likes you," I lean up sitting on Raph's lap again, crossing my arms. 

"Oh, please," he shakes his head, "I don't care about her, but stay away from him!"

"He basically lives with us, how the hell am I meant to do that?" 

"I don't care how ya do it. I just want ya to stay away from him because I'd rather not get in another fuckin' argument with Cade about him and his weird family members," 

I roll my eyes at my mate and lean down connecting our lips again, "And we aren't weird?" 

"I didn't say that," he shakes his head, but I cut him off, kissing him again, rubbing the palms of my hands over his chest. 

"No, but you sure thought it" I teased him then bit my lip thinking "Can we go again?" 

Raph just looked at me and smiled without saying a word and kissed me again. 

By the time we were done and ready to go back home, it was dark outside and my phone had been blowing up the entire time we were gone but I didn't bother calling Donatello back since we were coming home anyway. Me and Raph walked hand in hand and I reminded him that he owed me a pair of pants once we got back and he just laughed, so happy of himself that he destroyed a favorite pair of mine. 

Once we got back to the temple, we were shocked to find out that the place was actually pretty quiet. I decided that now would be the perfect time to change since nobody was around and when I got back downstairs, Raph was nowhere to be found so I tried his room, he wasn't there, and then I heard some commotion going on in the lab. 

I hurried into the room, finding the rest of my brothers and my two friends surrounding Leo on the table where we left him and his heart monitor was causing a constant beeping noise to spread out through the room. When Donnie looked up and saw me, I immediately could see the tear stains on his face. 

"Where were you?" was the only thing that left his mouth before he began sobbing again. On the table, I couldn't hear my brother's heart anymore, I couldn't feel how warm his energy was-- like it always was. From where I was standing he was cold. His body and soul were cold. 

Raph glanced down at me with tears in his own eyes, as if he was scolding me or something. 

"We did everything we could," I heard the sound of Cayden's voice and I felt a piece of me break away causing me to become unable to move. 

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	49. ᴮˡᵒᵒᵈ ᴿᵉˡᵃᵗᵉᵈ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chaos continues in this episode of Pick Your Poison, Donnie grieves, the long-awaited arrival of Venus is over and another home is destroyed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, I am back again. 
> 
> It's been a long two weeks (I think) since I last posted and I can't be bothered with finding out but I'm super happy to finally have this one out there in the opening and my ideas are coming into play and I hope you all enjoy them!
> 
> For further questions, concerns or suggestions use the social media listed in my bio to contact me or drop a comment down below and remember to leave kudos if you haven't already. 
> 
> (Super cringe, I know,)
> 
> Cowabunga! 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸⱽᴵᴵᴵ

ᴮˡᵒᵒᵈ ᴿᵉˡᵃᵗᵉᵈ

**[ Donatello ]**

I thought I would never feel it again. The pain of loss, though I saw this one coming. I just didn't wanna believe it. I didn't wanna care or think about it. I wanted to avoid it at all costs but it came at me anyway because this type of pain was a type that no matter how far you ran from it, it would always find a way to catch up to you. The farther you went, the distance you made, it would always find a way. 

"Donnie," I heard the faint sound of my little brothers voice and then his cold hand on my shoulder, "Donnie, I know you don't wanna leave, but I need you to eat, bro,"

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to blink away the white puffy spots in my vision from not sleeping in the last twenty-four hours. Looking at Leo's body and watching how his chest didn't rise and fall anymore, made me realize for the one-thousandth time that what happened, did happen and I couldn't stop it. It made me realize that I failed as a doctor, a scientist, and most importantly a brother to keep my Leo alive a little while longer until we found a way. 

_**Was** there a way?_

The tears had stopped long ago but I couldn't move from my spot. I didn't know what I wanted to do anymore. I had spent my entire life thinking about what I needed to do, what I had to do in order to keep my family safe, my home stable, and to be the best inventor my brothers had ever seen and most importantly to be the smartest son a father could have ever wanted. I had spent all that time thinking and not worrying if or when I'd ever stop thinking about things and for the first time in my life, I found the source of it. I found the cause and the main organ of my own emotional destruction and had finally stopped thinking. 

"He won't move," someone said, someone who wasn't my family, "We could carry him,"

"We have to keep trying for him," muttered another as if I wasn't here. 

The surface of Leo's skin was getting colder by the hour and the dried blood that had fallen from his lips seconds before his final breath mocked me and made whatever part was left of my soul ache. I found a new meaning behind grief. Behind grief and or pain and this, I couldn't imagine it any other way. 

When I finally looked away from my brother's corpse, something else inside of my chest was there. It was a giant black hole that needed to be filled again. I saw Mikey in the corner, arms crossed, never taking his eyes off of me and Aiden and Cayden were here too but when they noticed me finally breaking away they acted as if they were just staring at me the whole time trying to figure out how to fix whatever it is that is wrong with me. 

The first few words that slipped from my mouth were only a croak, "Where's Raph?"

Something in Mikey's eyes changed when I mentioned his mate and then he slowly came forward, avoiding the body that I'm still attached to, "He had to cool off, so I told him to go get some air,"

I slowly turned my head, cocking it off to one side, unable to move from the hardwood floor. My knees burned when I finally tried to stand and only succeeded with the help of my brother who looked emotionless. He showed no signs of anything and for that I envied him, however, I knew he was feeling something only just not showing it which he was good at, unlike Raph. 

When Mikey touched me, I could physically feel how he was trying to cheer me up. I managed to show him a glimpse of my fake smile, but for only for a second before I wanted to fall right back down but he caught me again, wrapping a muscular arm around my waist. I blinked a few times, clearing my vision before squinting at the light outside the tall windows, realizing that it was early in the morning and not night anymore. 

"How long have I been here?" I asked, not caring who heard but needing an answer. 

"All night," Mikey said, still holding me up by the arm and waist with a frown clear on his face, "You need to eat something"

"I'm not hungry"

"Then maybe some water, dude, I won't take no for an answer," he gives me a stern expression and I glance towards my brother's body again, cringing at the unbearable sight and turning away with a small sob. After another minute, Mikey is able to pull me out of the room and towards the kitchen where he makes me sit down at the table and drink a glass of water which I down in a matter of seconds. He then joins me at the table, eyes light with concern, "You gotta tell me what I can do,"

"Nothing" I answer dryly while staring at the empty glass of water and Mikey takes that as a hint of me wanting more and gets up to get it. 

"Don't say that," he shakes his head and sighs, putting the now filled glass back on the table, "I-I wasn't here, I need to know what happened! Cade and Aiden kept telling me it's best if you told us, but Raph, he--" Mikey pauses and stares at the surface of the table, "He couldn't believe it,"

"It wasn't special, Mikey," I remarked, wrapping my fingers around the slim glass, "About twenty minutes after you and Raph disappeared h-he um, he went into cardiac arrest,"

"Again?" Mikey exclaimed. 

"No, this was the first time and without the required equipment, we weren't able to stabilize him again. Aiden had mentioned that if it happened again, we wouldn't be able to stop it from going further and at that point I just wanted to go ahead with the change but Leo refused, he didn't wanna be one of those things," 

"Did they give him the venom after?" 

"No," I shook my head, "We need both of you for that," 

"Then let's do it right now!" Mikey stands up, "Before it's too late,"

I grab him by the wrist, "Cayden said it was,"

"Bullshit," he curses and I glare up at him before standing again, "It isn't like you to just give up, Donatello, now come on!"

"Mikey!" I shout, allowing tears to fall down my face, "I gave up when his heart stopped beating-- because now, I don't have anything left to give," 

The expression on my brother's face was pure defeat and confusion, but my crying didn't make him give up because he was stronger, much stronger than any of us alone and when he walked away to go back into the lab, I felt something inside of me change. I could feel strange energy coming from an unknown place. I channeled my Chi and followed the source which led me to my bedroom where I kept Venus. I stopped keeping her in the lab about a day after my brother's traveled to Japan because I felt a little territorial with her being around others even if they were her blood. I guess that was apart of being a parent. 

As I drew closer to her incubation dome, I noticed that the crack on top of her eggshell was a lot wider and a piece on the very top had broken and fallen inside. My eyes felt like they were gonna pop out of their sockets as I stared at the trembling egg. I swallowed thickly at the thoughts swimming around inside of my head and quickly reached inside with both hands, opening the dome and lifting the egg up into my palms. It felt so warm and oddly soft for such a hard structure. It was the first time I had held her since she was born and my heart only sunk deeper into the pits of my stomach when the thought of Leo came to mind again. 

I sniffled a bit and tried to get my emotions under control until I felt the egg in my hands tremble again and inside, I could feel and hear movement. I immediately went for the door, heading downstairs and going straight to the lab, where I met Raph, blocking my way. 

"Get outta my way" I managed to say but he wouldn't budge. 

"Why is she out of the incubation? Donnie, you know that's dangerous!" he growls, treating me like I don't already know these facts. 

"Move," I glare straight at him, considering me and Raph's height, "Please," 

He sighs and finally does what I ask, but follows me into the lab where I find the rest of the household. I try to avoid the way Leo looks, or maybe try to forget that he is gone for now. At least for now. I had some small hope he'd come back, I just didn't know-how.

"Donnie, you should be resting" Cade suggests and I ignore him, moving over to where Mikey is standing and I bring a smaller table into the middle of the room, more closer to Leo's side. 

"One of you, do me a favor and reach into the small fridge by my desk and get the bowl of water I've stored and put it here," I say pointing to the middle of the table in front of me. 

"D, what're you doing with Venus?" Mikey questions, eyeing my shaky hands. 

"It's time," I finally answer, watching Aiden fall through with what I requested. 

"The water is awfully warm, what do you need it for?" he asks, as I place the egg inside of the shallow pool of water inside of the bowl. 

"I won't be needing it," I interrupt, rubbing the edge of the egg with my pointer finger, "She will,"

"Wait," Raph says, obviously averting his eyes from our dead brother, "W-Why are we doin' this here, couldn't we have waited?" 

Mikey smacks Raph's arm, "D, said it was time, which means we all have to be here, regardless if Leo can-- speak for himself," my little brother trails off. 

I keep my eyes on the cracking egg and I smile a bit, "He wasn't here for the birth, but he _can_ be here when she comes into this world," 

"So, this is really happening?" Raph steps closer to me and Mikey, who hooks his arm around mine, keeping me from falling over. 

"Would you like us to step out?" Cayden questioned sincerely and I quickly shook my head. 

"N-No, you both can stay"

"How'd you even know she was ready?" Mikey said into my ear and I shrugged my shoulders.

"Something kept telling me that this _was_ the right time, that this was the right decision, like, she was somehow calling out to me," I answer just as quietly but this time Mikey doesn't respond but keeps his eyes focused on our daughter's egg that wiggled another crack into its surface which led all the way down the middle to the very bottom and split open. 

Next to me, I heard a faint gasp but I wasn't sure considering I couldn't break my focus from the thing in front of me. It was her and as soon as she broke out of her protective shell, and fell into the small pool of water, I could feel myself crying again. The small cries coming from the center of the room had my heart repairing itself but not fully healing and her size alone gave me that small push to smile for real this time. 

"Don?" the faint sound of Mikey's voice fades in and out of reality and suddenly I'm not here anymore. I'm not in the same room, I'm not in the same house and at this point, I'm not even sure I'm on the same planet anymore but when I finally fully open my eyes again and stare ahead of me, I see him, I see my Leo and he's smiling.

"Leo?" I say allowing the words roll off of my tongue and once they're out, the sound echoes all around me and when I see my surroundings, I feel the heat on the back of my shell from the sunrays and the crunch of the grass between my toes when I walked closer and in a light blue blanket, wrapped up, I saw our baby girl. 

I wondered briefly why blue, but then I realized who I was talking about and smiled at him but for only a moment, "I'm glad you're here," he confessed, our eyes meeting and I frowned. 

"I should be saying that to you," I reach out, caressing his cheek and swallowing thickly before he mimicks my upside-down smile and glances down at Venus who's listening intently to her parents' conversation. Her eyes give out the brightest swirls of color between yellows and blues and her skin mocks our olive cool tones including the hints of darker greens. She was truly beautiful and anything unlike what I expected her to be. I knew she would be something special, but she was something more than special.

"Beautiful," I said in between tears, feeling them roll down my cheeks. Venus stretched out a much smaller hand towards mine and when I went to touch her, someone else grabbed my hand, someone with a much furrier hand. I froze in place and I could feel my heart beginning to pound heavily on the inside of my body and my eyes followed up the arm of the hand who touched me and I met my father's eyes. 

"Donatello," he greeted me with a warm smile and I couldn't speak, I only heard the thudding in my ears and the pounding of my heart that sounded off against my rib cage. 

"H-How?" I stammered, unable to move and for a minute I glanced at Leo who kept the same expression, the same frown while looking down at our daughter, "How a-are you here?"

"I could ask you the same question, my son," he grins, still holding my hand and I realized that it was true, I could feel him, smell him this close and everything my brothers were saying was true, "I figured it was the time that you and I meet again,"

"F-For what?"

"I wanted to let you know that you aren't the failure that you think you are," he says, looking down at Venus, sharing that smile again, "None of my children are failures, and you are my brightest of them all and now, I need you to listen, I need you to promise that no matter what happens, you won't give up. Your brothers need you, your daughter needs you and most importantly, _you_ need you," 

"B-But Leo," I nearly sobbed as my father's hand came to rest at my cheek. 

"You _will_ see your brother again," 

I blinked, trying to focus on what's real and what isn't, "How?"

"Someone in the family has a gift," he answered, smiling at me again. 

My eyes focused in on Leo and this time he too was smiling and I was utterly confused, "Donnie,"

"Leo," I whispered, my voice shaking. 

"Don!" the voice was different this time and this one didn't sound like my Leo, "Donatello!"

Fluttering my eyes again, the field and flowers were vanishing and disappearing right before my eyes and then he was gone, they both were, she was and I was back where I started. The lab.

"Donnie, somethin' is happening!" shouted Raph who finally snapped me back into reality and I looked up, realizing that Venus wasn't where I last saw her. 

_Someone in the family has a gift._

The words echoed in my head, giving me short glimpses in time of blue flashing lights and memories I haven't thought of in a long while but trying to fight my way back into reality made me feel more disconnected from myself than to my brothers. I felt weak and completely drained.

"Come on, Donnie, you gotta get up!" Mikey yelled, sounding faint. I hadn't realized what happened until something hit me across the face and I yelped in pain. My eyes flew open, and just a few feet away I saw flames and fire. There was a crack in the frame of my glasses and I could barely see. I immediately started coughing because of the smoke and tried getting up until I was being lifted and I saw Mikey again, "Fuck, you're okay" he exclaims. 

"What happened?" I coughed again, using Mikey's shoulder to balance myself. 

"I-I don't know, dude," he looks at the temple which is now burning to the ground and a thought came to me and my mind flew into a panic. 

"Where is she!" I grabbed Mikey by the arms, wide-eyed he stares up at me, "Where the fuck is Venus, Mikey!" 

"I don't know!" he shouts, "E-Everything it e-exploded, I couldn't see anything! I don't even know where Raph is and my phone, I don't know where my phone is," 

I run my hands over my head, feeling the flood of anxiety wash over me, "We have to find her,"

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	50. ᴰᵃʳᵏⁿᵉˢˢ ᴰᵒᵉˢ ᴺᵒᵗ ᴰᵉˢᶜᵉⁿᵈ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the explosion, Raph sets out to find Venus when he runs into a type of trouble he soon regrets on every level.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The long-awaited Chapter Forty-Nine is finally fuckin' here, my children!
> 
> Greetings, 
> 
> I am back and finally posting again. I wanna apologize for taking so fuckin' long to get this one out to you all and that's IF you're still reading or going along with this. I am currently going through some things that haven't allowed me to be in such moods for writing or being creative and we all know what that can be like on many occasions. 
> 
> I don't know how long the final chapter for this book will take me to get done, but I'd like it to be longer than this one considering its only 2,300 characters and counting but it got the job done. 
> 
> I am also currently working on another series that isn't apart of any fandom at all and hopefully, you will read that too. In my next series, I will be formally introducing my OC Cayden as the main plotted character instead of some side-fling like in this one along with my new upcoming created female OC. 
> 
> I've always wanted to do a story where he is featured as the main priority and I'm super excited about that! 
> 
> For questions, concerns, and judgment then please use my Ask.FM listed in my bio here on AO3 or simply just comment down below and I'll get back to you as soon as I can but I will answer faster if you use Ask because it's one notification away and zing! Anyway-
> 
> Thank you again for meeting me this far (if you've gotten this far that is) and I love you all. Let's finish this one and it's onto a remake, or maybe, a third book. (insert winky face here)
> 
> I'll cya in the next one. Cowa-fucking-bunga!
> 
> \- Hydrakinz

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ˣᴸᴵˣ

ᴰᵃʳᵏⁿᵉˢˢ ᴰᵒᵉˢ ᴺᵒᵗ ᴰᵉˢᶜᵉⁿᵈ

**[ Raphael ]**

The only thing I could hear was the loud thuds of my feet smacking against the muddy grass as I ran. My breath was quick but not forced. I was moving as fast as I could, which in this case, being immortal, was very fast. 

I had to find them, her, my brothers. With the smoke in the air, their scent was masked and I couldn't find any trace of them in the explosion. People would think that finding someone would be easier this way but it wasn't. It was earlier in the morning and the fog was rollin' in and I couldn't help but worry if I'd ever find them again. 

"Donnie!" I finally stopped and yelled out, my voice stretching far and my breath hot and heavy making my nostrils flare with worry and frustration as I looked around, "Mikey!"

I waited a second before calling out to them again in case anyone responded, but I got nothin' back and my nerves were beginning to fry me to the bone. I was in the jungle for more than an hour and came up empty-handed. 

"She could be dead"

"Shut up!" I growled at my own thoughts and that's when I saw him again, or it, me. It looked like me. But it wasn't. I couldn't make much sense out of it, and I have yet to bring it to Cayden's attention because I know he's got bigger problems right now, "I don't have time for this shit,"

"Awh, because you know it's true?"

He was mockin' me-- or, I was mockin' me? It was confusing as fuck seeing yourself talking back to you, but when he was there earlier, in the lab, no one else noticed him but me so that was a relief on its own. Maybe I was just goin' bat shit crazy or this was all apart of my abilities I couldn't control any fuckin' more. 

"None of it is fuckin' true, now leave me the fuck alone!" I shouted at the make-believe-doppelganger who looked better than I did probably. Especially now.

"It'd be better if you'd just accept my presence, Raphie because I'm not goin' nowhere,"

I swung at the figure but my fist connected with nothing but a black shadow that disappeared, thankfully- then came back in a different place, leaning on a tree across from me with a sinister grin on his face, "I can't be seen talkin' to a fuckin' shadow,"

"And why not?" he rolls his eyes, "You're already seen as the fucked up one anyway"

"Fuck you!" I yell, stomping straight past him.

I get far enough away when I finally stop hearing his thoughts but they remain in my mind until I catch the scent of something unknown. The smell lingers so far that I end up drifting further and further away from the temple and when I finally stop, I find myself at the edge of a waterfall that drops straight off into a large pond. The air wasn't as foggy as before and the sun was really beginning to come out which again, you'd think meant good news. 

Scanning the trees, I listen closely to my surroundings, forgetting for a solid second that I was out here looking for my kid. My actual kid. It sounded weird rolling off my tongue or even in my head but regardless of the oddness, I liked it. I liked the thought of me finally being able to say that I have a daughter, Venus. 

_"Hey, Raph,"_ came an echoing voice, making me quickly turn around, but seeing that nobody was there. I was immediately confused. It had to of been my thoughts fuckin' with me again. My new _friend_ who looked just like me had a way of playing games with me but the only time he was really about to take control was when I hadn't fed in a couple of days. The weaker I was the more I became someone else. 

In the bushes, I could hear somethin' shuffling around and when it heard me coming closer, it ran in the opposite direction. I even tried to track it and came out empty-handed again. I figured that it was some kind of animal I didn't recognize but the voice made it a little too hard to believe that it was some trick, at least realistically. 

From behind, I heard footsteps, fast ones but before I could react, I flew forward, scraping my knees across the ground and digging my fingers into the dirt and when I finally flipped myself around and stood up, the remaining gravel in my fists flew everywhere and I was fuming because I officially realized that someone, _not my mind,_ but someone was fuckin' with me. 

"Alright, you motherfucker!" I shouted, clenching my fists tight, fingers curling around the base of my sai's and preparing for another blow, but it doesn't come. The only thing I hear is distant laughter and I'm back to being confused until the laughing isn't so far away anymore. It gets closer until I see _him_ walk out of the trees, slowly step by step and he stops, standing right at the edge of the cliff I was on from before and grinning at me, he tilts his head, "Leo?" 

"Hello, Raph," he greets me like it's some family fuckin' reunion. 

I stare at him unable to figure out how he was standing in front of me right now, "Y-You're alive,"

"You sound disappointed, brother," he fakely pouts, showing off that shit-eating grin again. 

"Shut the fuck up! How are you alive! You were dead!" I pointed the tip of my weapon at him, not knowing whether I should put them away or keep them in case he tries anything else. "I saw you, y-you were fuckin' gone!"

Leo takes a step forward, acting as if I'm not willing to hurt him if he pushes me again, "I guess the venom worked, yeah?"

"No, that wasn't the fuckin' venom, it wasn't the blood either! The whole place exploded! You're lucky ta be alive right now! I haven't found the others, and I'm lookin' for Venus," I growl at him, holding my protective stance in a locked position, not moving.

"Venus?" Leo repeats, his words sounding like more of a snarl or scoff, I couldn't really tell, "She saved me," he says and as I look at him, I notice that his left eye was now red, instead of blue.

"The fuck do you mean, she _saved_ you?"

"I mean, she _brought_ me back. That's pretty explanatory, right? Do I need to go further?" he questions with a sarcastic tone laced in his deeply figured voice. 

I shake my head unable to fuckin' comprehend any of this shit, "How the fuck did she bring ya back, she's just a baby!" I shout, standing up straight, finally deciding to put my weapons away. 

"She's special," Leo simply says, "Our daughter is so very special and this world has _yet_ to see it. And so do you, Don and Mikey." 

"Leo, ya aren't making any fuckin' sense!"

"What a _surprise,_ I'm not making sense to the great Raphael," he claps sarcastically at me and I could physically feel my anger being fueled with every quiet smack of his hands. 

"Tell me where the fuck she is, Leo, or I swear ta christ--"

"Or what? You'll fight me? I'd love to see you fucking try you big headed idiot," he smirks, and I could feel the sting of his words hitting me in the face like a ton of bricks. 

I shake my head, standing up straight allowing my inner energy to flow through my veins and cool my temper, until I felt a hand on my shoulder, but I didn't flinch or turn to face the thing I couldn't smell. The thing that only existed in my mind. 

"Why not fight him? You could really do some damage here"

Ignoring the shadow I stare dead at my brother, "Fighting you would be a waste, Leo,"

"What?" he tilts his head at me, obviously in shock at my comeback. 

"I'm not fighting you today," I grin smugly at him, lowering my weapons, "Now, you can either tell me where Venus is, or you can walk away and never come back and I'll find her myself,"

"Man, Don will not be happy about that,"

"Never come back?" he repeats, mocking my knowing glare, "Is that just what _you_ want or is that what everyone would want?"

"Don't turn this around on me," I say not breaking our eye contact, "I've seen what you can become when you're like this,"

"Wait, you have?"

"You haven't been much of a leader in months and I could keep pilling on the other fucking times ya haven't been there or even made the effort like I have!" I shout towards him but he doesn't look affected by my words or threats. 

"You're amusing when you have so much to say, Raph," he sighs, glancing at the ground and then up at the sky, showing off the change in his eyes. Leo's left eye was now red while the other remained blue, but a much brighter yet neon blue, "This wasn't meant to happen, you know?" he declares finally lowering his head to look back at me and I just stare at him, "Me and you, you and Mikey- fuck, me and Donnie, all of us, we weren't even meant to be a thing. Just a fuckin' myth. Even our goddamn relationship is a myth,"

"You're talkin' nonsense, ya know that?"

"Maybe," he laughs shrugging his shoulders and as he does this, I see something evil behind his eyes, behind his smile that I knew once before but now only knew as a strange thing.

"Maybe?" I step closer, "Enough of this bullshit! Where the fuck is Venus, Leo!" 

When I raise my voice at my brother, my head suddenly began to hurt and when I say hurt, I mean really hurt. It throbbed harshly in the back of my skull and the moment I released the slightest sound of a whimper, Leo was there, he was in front of me now, but not for support, but for something _else._ He wrapped his hand around my throat and I could feel myself getting weaker by the second. I was suddenly on my knees, unable to breathe and when I looked up at my brother, there was nothing but that fucking grin on his face. His eyes were glowing down at me and so were the colorful patterns swirling around his body that looked to be his Chi. 

"L-Leo!" I choked out, not understanding how he could possibly be stronger than me. Or maybe I did, I didn't know what he was or who he was considering he didn't look nothing like me or Mikey or even Cade at this point. I reached up, grasping my fists around his wrist, tightening my grip and when I tried to pull his hand away from me, the more the back of my head throbbed. 

"You will no longer be worthy enough to carry these abilities," he says to me sounding strained but empowered and as I choked on my own breath, my knees were digging into the dirt below and over Leo's shoulder I could see my shadow mocking me with sad eyes. 

_What did he mean by that? The fuck was he talkin' about?_

"Leo!" I tried to scream but as soon as the word left my lips something inside of me felt like it was being tugged on, ripped away, like someone or something grabbed my heart and was trying to take it straight from my body and when I looked up again, I could physically see and feel myself being drained and then, he let go of me. 

Gasping for air, I fell to the ground, landing on my fists and I began coughing harshly. I didn't feel anger, I didn't feel anything except for my own heart pounding in my chest. When I looked up to find my brother, he wasn't there. He was no where in sight. 

"Raph?" a voice called closing in on me and I flinched when I felt the pair of hands on my body, "Hey! Hey it's me," Mikey cooed, caressing my face and trying to get me to focus on him and it takes me a minute but when I see him and the drowning blue pools of his eyes, a flood of relief washes over me and grab on to him. 

"Mike," I sigh, throwing my arms around his shell and tugging him closer. 

"Is he alright?" the thick sound of Aiden's accent was loud behind me and when I finally got to my feet, holding onto Mikey's shoulder, I saw Cade and the look on his face was different than all the others I've seen him give me and then Donnie walked up beside him. All of them were covered in tar, including myself and in my brothers arms I saw what I was looking for all along. 

"Venus, she's-"

"She's fine, she's okay," Mikey says into my ear, bringing my head closer and then he winces pulling away, "Raph, you- you're really hot, like, you have a fever," 

"Cayden, what is going on?" Aiden asks him, but he doesn't respond. 

Our eyes meet and I'm just as confused and right as I'm about to ask what the fuck is goin' on, Cade steps forward, staring right at me, "I can no longer hear your thoughts," 

"What?" Aiden grabs his shoulder, "That can't be possible, right?"

Cade moves closer to me, watching my face like he's looking for something, "You are no longer of our species," he mutters as Mikey steps away from me. 

"H-He's normal," my brother whispers like I can't hear him. 

But I definitely could and they were right.

_I wasn't one of them anymore._

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ


	51. ᴺᵒᵗ Sᵒ Sʷᵉᵉᵗ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On this final heartfelt episode of Pick Your Poison, the boys find closure in an underground militia bunker and Raph spills the news about Leo and the truth unfolds about how he's suddenly a normal turtle again while the others, including their daughter, remain untouched.

ᴾⁱᶜᵏ Yᵒᵘʳ ᴾᵒⁱˢᵒⁿ

Cʰᵃᵖᵗᵉʳ ᴸ

ᴺᵒᵗ Sᵒ Sʷᵉᵉᵗ

* * *

> **[ Donatello ]**

* * *

If things weren't crazy already I'd say they just got even crazier. It was official. Leo was gone. Gone again but for a different reason. He kept leaving and disappearing and I think I was finally beginning to accept it and just ignore the cycle he kept me looped in. I was insane to think it would stop. Insane to think things would get better. I always thought it would, especially after Venus was brought into the world, but I was wrong. Wrong again. 

"Where the fuck are we going?" 

"Somewhere safe, Raphael," Cayden answered my short-tempered brother who didn't look much like my brother anymore. I've never seen him so weak, so calm but- not? It was a sight for sore eyes I'll tell you that. 

"Somewhere safe," Raph mocks under his breath along with a dramatic eye roll. He kept hanging onto Mikey for support but he too seemed different and a little off. 

"How's the trail coming along Aiden?" Cade calls ahead and from above, his brother jumps from a tree branch and lands on his feet in front of us which causes a loud thud when his leather boots smack against the drying muddy ground. 

"It's cold," the redhead answers with smugness laced in his sharp accent as he dusts off the dirt from his jacket, "The only thing I keep pickin' up is the stench from a bunch of different type of animals and perhaps shoe prints from the late nineteen-eighties," 

"Can you at least track the prints?" Cade continues pointing East, "I have a good feeling that someone around here in this country got a little paranoid and built an apocalyptic bunker a few decades ago," 

"Wait, hold up," I interrupt, tightening my grip on the blanket in my arms, "You're telling me we're looking for a freaking bunker? Like a war bunker?" 

"Possibly, yes," Cade says without looking at me and then he walks off, going in the direction where he pointed. 

"We can't go in one of those, are you nuts!" I shout after him and Venus shifts in my arms, making me realize that I need to control my temper. I reach up, wiping the sweat from my forehead with the back of my hand, "Look, we've been walking for over an hour. We didn't even try going back to see if the car survived the explosion,"

"And risk exposing ourselves, Donnie?" Raph snaps, "Ya think just because we live up in the fuckin' woods they won't see a big ass explosion and flames goin' up in the sky? There has to be at least a dozen police back there," 

"And what if there wasn't?" Mikey adds, creating his own interrupted speech, "Why was there even an explosion in the first place, dude? What happened with Leo?"

"We aren't talking about Leo, Mikey," I practically scold him and he gives me that stare I hated getting from just about anybody. 

"Why?" he scoffs, "Because he's gone again? Vanish, poof!" my little brother spits with his tongue out making the noises to what it sounds like when someone _disappears_ in the movies. 

"Mikey we aren't doing this now, so, would you please!-" I begin but he starts laughing like a mad man and walks away, excluding himself from the possible argument we were beginning to undergo.

Cade sighs when my little brother stomps past him in a rage, "You don't need to be running off, Michelangelo,"

Mikey stops and gives off that look again, "You don't need to be telling me what to do pencil dick!"

A few feet away I hear Aiden crack up at my brother's insult and I roll my eyes in the process, "We aren't getting anywhere arguing! Now, are we gonna find this place, or not?"

"Yeah," Cade answers my forward question without breaking eye contact with my brother until Raph lands a hand on his shoulder and tells him to let it go before something else bad happens, "We'll be heading for the rest of the path and see if the tracks lead east to south and maybe we'll uncover something and if we do, I and Aiden will scout back to the temple and see about the car,"

"You'd do that?" I couldn't help but ask him as I caught up and joined him in the walk as Venus squirms in my arms for obvious reasons.

"What will she eat?" he smiles at me and then down at her right as Raph steps into the conversation and slaps a hand on his shoulder again, mocking his grin. 

"Are we done mingling and wasting fuckin' time, now?" his grip on our friend's shoulder is a point to be taken and then best forgotten so we continue up the trail, eventually catching up with Mikey who is swinging from trees like a monkey and scouting off ahead of us with Aiden.

It was another hour before we actually found something valuable and Cade was right. There _was_ a bunker and before I brought Venus inside, I made him and the rest of our little team make sure it was safe and luckily it was. It was quite large inside and rather spacey. It wasn't the nicest place in the world but I didn't care. I've seen worse and even lived in worse before all this. 

_Before her._

After Cade left again and took his brother with him to keep his quiet promise, I settled in, rearranging what little furniture was inside this place. There were two beds, one twin and full size and they were in mint condition which was pretty surprising to me. 

"Is she alright?" Raph questioned while leaning against the doorway and when I looked at him, I had noticed that his eyes were green again and not some other stupidly bright color that didn't make any sense. Though during the time I didn't mind it. 

I give him a small smile, ignoring the pressing thoughts in the back of my mind, "Yeah, she's okay. I picked up some banana leaves on the way here and cut those up. She seemed to love them like I knew she would," 

Raph entered the room and looked down at Venus who was sprawled out on the twin mattress and napping face down. I made sure her blanket was covering her up real good incase she got cold and when Raph reached down to touch her, she hugged his large hand and I saw the grin on his face stretch out wide. 

"She's really somethin' ain't she?" he says and I agree, sitting down in the wooden chair next to the bed and its rusty frame. 

"She had one hell of an entrance that's for sure," I point out, looking into the darkest corner of the room, "Though Mikey's curiosity has me by the neck," 

He looks right at me when the words come out of my mouth and the only thing I can do is just avoid his eyes, knowing he won't wanna talk about Leo, but I needed to know.

"I thought ya said we weren't gonna talk about him," my brother dissolves my guilty conscience.

"I thought that too. But I can't help it after all the hours that have passed, its the only thing I keep thinking about," I answer, leaning my shell back against the chair, hoping it can handle my weight, "Plus, for the past year, everything that has happened, it's like we brush it off or ignore the reality of it,"

"Should we name them off?" he asks and I meet his eyes, unsure if he was being sarcastic or not.

I shrugged my shoulders and reached over to brush my fingers across the hard surface of Venus' much smaller carapace, "First was when we fell in love with one another," 

"I think we took that by storm, don't cha think?" he jokes and for once I smiled and agreed with him, "We got this far by the string of it,"

"Others would say we're disgusting"

"Others can kiss the underside of my shell, Donnie," he remarks and I go to roll my eyes, "We don't live by human rules and if we did, I don't think even _then_ we'd abide by em' we'd still be us, just less green"

"Oh shut up," I say with a near laugh in my voice and then I continue, "Our Chi,"

When I mentioned the subject of our abilities to Raph, I could feel the energy in the room shift uncomfortably, "Yeah, what about it?"

"Complicated," I muttered, "So damn, complicated, Raphael,"

"When Cade said that back at the waterfall-"

"Which bit? A lot of things were said," I interrupt, fiddling with my belt. 

"About me not being like him anymore,"

The conversation soon falls flat and I slowly stand up, "You can't be serious about that. I thought it was a joke of some sort,"

"When the fuck does Cayden joke about shit? Leo fuckin' did somethin' ta me and now-" Raph pauses gaining some distance from our daughter's bed, "Now, I can't fuckin' feel anything!"

"That can't be possible," I murmured, knowing he won't hear me, "We have to run some sort of test on you, figure out if maybe they really are gone,"

"I know my body, Donnie! I know because I no longer thirst for your or her blood," he snaps while finally looking at me from across the room as he speaks, "I don't know how or understand it, but he did somethin' ta me, he took away everything-- everything that I was, that I thought I didn't need to be until now. It's like I feel fuckin' empty almost,"

I was quick to cross the room and throw my arms around my brother's neck, "You're not empty! Don't say things like that," I scold him, tightening my grip and I hear him sigh allowing his breath to sink into the flesh of my neck, "You're still Raph, at least to me,"

"I'm not the me _I know_ ," he says, not hugging me back and I step away, meeting his eyes. 

"We will find a way- if there's a will there's a way, Raphael," I promise just before a cry from the other side of the room interrupts us. 

I immediately let go of my brother and come to Venus' side, lifting her up and on to my chest, making sure her blanket comes right along with me, "Is she okay?"

"I think so," I answer, "We don't have any formula, so, I don't know how we're going to keep her nutrient up to date," 

Worry fills my mind when the words leave my mouth and by the look on Raph's face, he too is worried about what we're going to do, considering every single time we bunk down somewhere, it either blows up or gets overrun by some military militia that nobody knows about or is unable to defeat except for the ones they are coming after. 

"It's fine, we'll find a way to get some, me and Leo--" Raph stops talking mid-sentence, and I hold Venus tighter at the mention of our brother, "We had uh, we had some money stored, I can always give that ta Cade and--" 

"No, need," our friend says entering the room, staring at us both, "Aiden is out there filling Mike in with the details for what I'm about to tell you,"

Raph's head snaps up in his direction, "What'd you find?" 

"First things first, I would never take your money-" Cade points out, "Because I know you guys need it, way more than I do, and secondly- the explosion wasn't as bad as we thought. In fact, the radius blew up as far as the lab and maybe the living room? The noise did cause the police to come crawling and thanks to Aiden, he got them to walk away from the situation with a few mind tricks,"

Looking and feeling surprised I couldn't help but ask, "So, we can go back?" 

Cade looks at me with sincerity and smiles, "Not tonight, but not to worry- for the next week or so, I'm willing to provide you all with whatever you need, especially the little one. Me and Aiden are gonna keep an eye on the temple until things cool down and then when I think the time is right, we all can go back and see about moving back in,"

"She needs specific things," Raph speaks up, glancing at me and back to our friend. 

"You'll see that she will have them and until then, we need to talk about Leo," 

The energy in the room changes again, but thickens as the second's tick by and when Venus finally stops squirming in my arms, I realize that she was looking up at me at the mention of our brother, "What about him?" Raph asks.

"We need to discuss what happened," Cade answers and I finally seat myself back down but on the bed this time, eager to hear this conversation but considering how Raph felt, I didn't wanna push him into telling me like I know how Cade will. 

"I was on my way ta find her," my brother points at the little turtle in my arms who is hugging and holding onto my arm for dear life, yet looking so peaceful while she falls back asleep, "I ran into him back at that waterfall- surprised the shit out of me," Raph laughs, but only for a second, "I thought he was dead like we all did, but no-- he was alive, the bastard was and looked perfectly fine, like nothin' that happened didn't happen and he was different,"

"What do you mean by different?" I question delicately. 

"He just wasn't the Leo I knew," he looks at me, "The Leo we all knew," 

"Did you two have a fight?" Cade continues, urging Raph to continue and I already knew the answer to his question. It was the most typical question of them all. 

"Yeah," Raph nods, nervously twisting the sai in his hand, "We did, but it wasn't like all our other fights, this one was different- everything about him was different- except for the way he looked. He looked exactly like himself, besides the eyes, somethin' about his eyes were new," 

"Glowing?" Cade spoke again, writing mental notes in the back of his head. 

"Yeah, but nothin' about em' was good. He didn't mean well, he wanted ta fuckin' kill me back there, that's how--" my brother pauses again, looking down, gripping the weapon in his hand, obviously feeling humiliation, "That's how I ended up like this,"

Cade stroked his chin with wonder and slowly backed up into the doorway in a heap of thought, "He touched you, correct?"

"Course' he fuckin' touched me, tha prick nearly strangled me!" 

I looked away for a moment, allowing the sight of Venus to take me away from what memories threatened to wash over me. The image of when Leo's hands were wrapped around my throat in our old dojo. When he was on top of me, throwing punch after punch, unable to stop. I saw something in his eyes that couldn't be tamed or controlled.

"What happened next, Raph? I need details," Cade pushes, snapping his eyes away from my brother and to me with one stiff glance.

"What's any of this gonna fuckin' solve, huh?" 

"A shit ton, now tell me what the fuck happened, I need to know more!" Cade begs harshly and then allows his eyes to soften when he sees Venus again. I'm sure he gave me a mental apology for cursing so much in front of her and I was thankful for such manners coming from someone I didn't know everything about, at least yet. 

_But I couldn't say much considering what we did back in Alaska._

"There's not much else ta say except when he grabbed me, it's like he sucked the life right outta me, I don't fuckin' know, alright? I don't know," Raph shakes his head and quickly leaves the room, as I figured he would. 

Rocking Venus in my arms, Cade looks at me again, knowing the final thoughts on my mind, "You'll see him again,"

I released a small laugh, "I don't think I will,"

* * *

ᵀᵒ ᴮᵉ Cᵒⁿᵗⁱⁿᵘᵉᵈ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings, Moon Children. 
> 
> Here we are, another end, another final chapter to yet another book in my series. 
> 
> If you've made it thus far, then I applaud you. Especially if you're here all the way from Book One. 
> 
> When I started this series, I was absolutely infatuated with the idea of these four special boys. I still am regardless of my disconnection that I've been trying to fight against for months. I fell down a hole without motivation and I spiraled out of control and didn't write anything at all and I'm still there but not at the same time. Every writer gets like this and every writer gets stuck sometimes. 
> 
> I wanna thank every last person who has commented or remotely read this story with or without knowledge of who it's about, what it's about or what it was even going to be because at first, I had no fucking clue what I was doing or where this was going to go. I knew I enjoyed my turts, but I didn't think I'd ever be writing a story about a potential incest plot. And I don't regret it one bit. I've learned so much from writing this series and one of those things is acceptance and truthful love. 
> 
> It takes dedication to get this far, and anyone can do it and I'm so happy I can end this one on a better note than I thought I ever would or could due to my recent difficulties. 
> 
> I'm unsure when I will continue this series, but if I had a date set or even an idea in mind, I would like to remaster this series, redo it in a better light and perhaps choose a much more detailed path for Donnie, Mike, Raph, and Leo to fall in love with one another. 
> 
> Next time around, I'd make it a much slower burned story than this one but we shall see. 
> 
> Again, I wanna thank every last person who has taken the time to read my story and for my lover supporting me all the way through and reading gay smut without an issue, I love you. 
> 
> Use my Ask.FM that is here on my AO3 Bio if you have any questions, concerns, or judgment or simply just comment below!
> 
> Thank you. 
> 
> \- Hydrakinz


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